http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:sappy-fire&section=today deviantART RSS for by:sappy-fire en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Fri, 11 Dec 2009 21:14:37 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/16879499/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/16879499/ Thu, 14 Feb 2008 10:55:28 PST
The Interventions of Edward Forrest is on hiatus while I pull my grades up (I made a 2.955555555 last semester, so I had to appeal some scholarships). I have the first couple chapters written, and a number of other chapters mapped out (the same old excuse...planned but not done).

My roommate is moving out, and my girlfriend is moving in, so I'm happier...but something's just not right; some people have been walking around in masks lately. I try not to let it bother me, and cling to the true friends who don't.

Refunded my Comic-Con tickets, because I could use the money for better things; also, next year is going to be huge because it's going to be the 30th I think (or 40th *shrug*).

I have a couple other things I could talk about, but I have to go study for a biology test tomorrow...it's about the peeneys and vaginas...and postsynaptic terminals, the excitatory/inhibitory responses, and other neuron/action potential stuff...

Peace
-Willum

]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/13657503/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/13657503/ Sun, 08 Jul 2007 10:55:50 PDT
I have another short story/arc type story to write called Lost Songs (working title). I may put some scraps of that up soon.

Life's going allright.

-Working my way to going to the gym every day or two
-About to start working full time at the hospital again to get some more money before summer ends and fall semester starts
-My consciences have been oddly quiet as of late
-I shaved my head, so I got the hawk now...I may take pictures. I can still part my hair down the middle and almost make it look normal, heh.
-I'm in the middle of planning an art project for myself. I want to at least have started before summer ends.

That's about it for now. Comment with what's going on in your life/recommend a drink (alcoholic or not doesn't matter) or food that you think is good. Me and the girlfriend tried making coconut shrimp the other day. It was awesome, but would have been perfect if we had something we could control the temp. with (our stove only has off and "up")

Peace out.

]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/11114571/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/11114571/ Tue, 19 Dec 2006 09:19:53 PST
Here's a boredom-induced quiz of aweful...

Stolen from lyonlamb, who stole it from raedoe...

1. Open your library, put it on shuffle, press play.
2. For every question, type the song that's playing.
3. When you go to a new question, press the "next" button.

Opening credit:
Been Through the Storm - Busta Rhymes

Waking up:
Stand Up and Holler - Junior

First Day of School:
The Downward Spiral (The Bottom) - NIN

Falling in Love:
Vice President Fruitley - Eels

Fight Song:
Crying Like a Man - Joseph Arthur (hahah!)

Breaking Up:
Better of Two Evils - Marilyn Manson (kinda funny)

Prom:
Everything Zen (acoustic) - Bush

Life:
Broke - Modest mouse (nice)

Mental Breakdown:
History - Joseph Arthur

Driving:
Enough Space - Foo Fighters

Flashback:
A Million Miles Away - Offspring (good one)

Wedding:
Clawfinder - Rammstein (eh?)

Birth Of Child:
End of the World (acoustic) - Cole (hahahah!)

Final Battle:
Bulletproof - Los Lobos (lol, no complaints)

Death Scene:
Lover Lay Down - Dave Matthews Band (hmm...not bad)

Funeral Song:
I'm Lost Without You - Blink 182 (Also good)

End Credit:
Farmer Chords - Ben Gibbard (eh...)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So...good news/bad news, kids...I haven't been updating, obviously...I failed Chemistry (D's don't count toward your major), I'm gonna be homeless in a week and a half, and I have to write an appeal for my scholarship for the scholar's college. I'm writing alot in a book, I'm writing all my short stories in it, so it will essentially be an anthology of my works over however many years...plus new ones, so they're mixed in kinda randomly at the moment.....and that's just about the only good news...*shrug*...sorry. Not my proudest moment, I know...

]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/9991998/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/9991998/ Wed, 06 Sep 2006 18:49:06 PDT
Ask me some questions or something, so I can feel important and alive again... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/9051688/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/9051688/ Mon, 12 Jun 2006 22:10:39 PDT
[link]osted=1#post627797

Pictures there...I would've taken a LOT MORE, if they didn't have staff members dressed like normal people...they were DISGUISED so people didn't take pictures of the shit...jeez!

Gone almost 2000 miles from home...here in Dubois (not doo-bwah, southerners, doo-boys), Pennsylvania. Not looking forward to reaching my aunt's...she's a crazy bitch...especially after having such a great time at my uncle's.

-Willum...they had some great punk shit in the gift shop, too...imported from england...and expensive...I just got a DVD, it's good. ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/8854581/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/8854581/ Tue, 23 May 2006 13:20:26 PDT
May 7th...I noticed a spide bit on my leg...holy crap, better take care of that... 2 days later it was hard and kinda...well, it popped to reveal purulent (pussy...not the kind women have...puss-E) bloodiness...the next day, after I thought it was getting better I got a fever, and it got bigger...finally went to the ER after 4 days.

They did some bloodwork and cut open said "spide bite" which ended up being staph infection. They were about to let me go when they said 'wait...hmm...holy dear mother of sweet jesus, you have to stay the night"...because my white cell count was 25...normal human count is 11. Apparently the infection reached my bloodstream and my whole body was infected.

So all thursday night and friday I get to go insane in a room...mostly in bed...but the food was good enough. Saturday around 4 PM I go to surgery because there was another abscess (sp)...deeper in my leg, and apparently a tunnel going up my leg where it was trying to kill me via some artery or something...so I'm in and out of it for the rest of the day, up all night...going slowly insane and my hair's all dishevaled because there was a staph infected bump on my head...which probably reached my brain...and they cut the hair around it and packed it as well as the new hole in my leg.

Monday came...and I felt new levels of pain...and realized I was in fact alive and in existence...apparently, after surgery, the surgeons pack things like what I had in my leg tight with stuff to stop it filling with blood and whatnot...they keep promising me a loratab an hour before the packing change, because it hurt like shit when it was a 1 in cut that was 2 inched deep...now it's about 6 inches long and 4 inches deep...with a tunnel buried there, that is also packed...so yeah.

no loratab, I just wake up 2 minutes before the chick walks in, and halfway through, I reach that plateau of pain (some of you have to know what I'm talking about), where you feel so much pain, you can't see hardly, you can't feel anything else in your body, and your breathing stops altogether, making you feel a thousand pounds of imaginary pressure on your chest...then, while I'm floating through this abyss of pain, and I can vaguely hear my skin plucking free from the gauze that it's tried to heal itself to in the past 2 days, I feel something warm...then the pain that I was feeling through my entire body was washed over in fire...that's right, I jumped from that plateau to a new level of pain, where everything slowed down around me, my heart pumped like someone was trying to squeeze it, and my eyes were looking into the abyss that was my soul...as dramatic as all that sounds...imagine it, and you'll be getting warmer to what I was feeling.

Afterward I was exhausted enough to pass out...for a couple hours. Then I got out that Monday (15th, so in the 4 and a half days I hadn't set foot outside that room), and the next day I dreaded going to the Physical Therapist (which I have to go to everyday so they can change that packing in my leg as it slowly heals from the bottom up), and although it hurt pretty fucken bad, it didn't hurt nearly as bad as I thought...

Now here's the copy/paste part...a little out of some order, but oh well...

...I feel kinda light headed right now...like I almost have a headache, but not...(probably from the antibiotic I gotta take everyday)

I wanna go to Vienna, because there's a solo exhibition for H.R. Giger starting tomorrow (today actually) through October. *sigh*...I'm probably not going to make it, though...*shrug* oh well.

The hole in my leg is getting smaller, and it doesn't hurt nearly as bad as it used to...maybe a combination of less exposed nerve and developed tolerance to pain. I still gotta go to Physical Therapy everyday so she can pull out the endless line of scarves from my leg, and a couple rabbits...maybe a pidgeon or dove or something, and pack some more in there. It used to be 10cm long, 5-6 cm deep, and have a 3 cm tunnel from the bottom running up toward my junk/artery of impending death...but since, it's about 7.3cm long, 4.2 cm deep at the deep end, and 2cm deep at the shallow end, and no tunnel...but random tender spots as nerves regrow and don't have skin grown over them yet...yeah, it's like a daily dose of pain to wake me up for my day. *shrug*...maybe this will give me character, or something...

I haven't written anything since last week...but I started writing an account of my fever dreams and whatnot, for continuity and humor/amusement. There's a good number of stuff I wanna write, but sitting here with an aching leg-hole, I'm just not feeling it like I need to...*sigh again*

Got some problems, too...nee... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/8263775/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/8263775/ Sat, 25 Mar 2006 10:07:15 PST
....incredible amounts of ass were kicked by the concert. Saul Williams opened for them...he is the greatest rapper. Ever....look him up. He's also a writer and poet, and since NIN is going to be in Bossier, he's reading some of his stuff at Barnes & Noble tomorrow (today, Saturday) at 2 PM...I got work to do so I can't make it...otherwise, you bet your ass I'd be there.

....putting my resume' together for applying at the hospital, and I got a house to live in. 225 dollars a month for rent, 150 for utilities (between 3 people), and about 85 for cable and internet (add 40 dollars for a wireless router)(between 3 people)...everything's starting to float in line...

April 5, if I can get enough people to go, I'm going to see the PM5K concert...and I gotta get up to Bossier some time and see the Stay Alive movie...don't gimme that crap about it going to suck, I gotta see it anyway...and I gotta buy a USB remote for the lappy.

That's enough...I'm going to finish up my resume' and watch a movie.

-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/8137942/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/8137942/ Sun, 12 Mar 2006 09:36:43 PST [link]

Go there....it's funny.

copy/pasted story of today (Saturday, whatever)
It starts with me having to clean my girlfriend's bathroom in her suite because she bought me at the male auction last month...so anyway, get done with that, and now i have to walk with her to the library and carry a bunch of books, etc...

so on the way we pass this big square encasing for generators, etc for the library, and there's this girl leaning against the wall crying and she starts limping to the door. I say to myself "what the hell?" and feel the need to help her because I'm a certified nursing aide with first aide certification, etc...and don't want her to drop dead from whatever is wrong with her...

anyway, I ask what's wrong. She kinda stammers, and says "I...I fell". I look her over, and the first thing that came to mind was she has some boyfriend or something who beat her or pushed her down the steps or something. So I try to get her to talk a little as we get to the library, and I stay with her as my girlfriend goes upstairs.

The library didn't have a first-aid kit at all...so I ran all the way back to my dorm and grabbed my first aid kit, and drove back to the library. The lirarians say they gave her a couple bandaids and she left. I run back to my truck and drive around the back of the library to where I found her, and this little gate door is swung open, whereas it was closed before. I, being the paranoid spic I am, wrapped my hand around my pocket knife with the other hand and went in.

Over 3 metal steps and in a little alcove of the place are her, another girl, and a greasy guy sitting there fucken cooking meth and rolling a fucken half dozen joints. I see all the materials out there like a fucken martha stewart special, and the guy had a knife. They all look at me like I'm the cops, and I lean down to the chick and say "listen, I don't give a fuck what you kids are doing back here, but let me see your cuts" and I give her alcohol wipes, etc...then tell them "hey, be careful back here...and don't be TOO fucken stupid" then I walked away...

....damn kids...lost a little bit of the little bit of faith I had in humanity.

Other than that, making cookies with Stacy tonight, and drinking Friday night with friends, that's about it...I got psyc homework to do tomorrow.

...oh yeah, April 05 (yeah, 04-05-06) Powerman 5000 is playing at Juanita's in Little Rock at 9 P.M. $15 general admission...I want to go, and I was going to, but a few days later I found out about a good friend's birthday suprise party/drinking with friends fest the same night...god dammit, I dunno what to do. I'm not sure how many more chances I'll have to see PM5K, and I know this is a one time party chance to drink with a lot of friends....*sigh* comments?

That's it...have fun.
-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7745309/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7745309/ Sun, 29 Jan 2006 19:43:30 PST
....I know, alot of you older DA members are noticing, as well as I am, the constant and rapid decline into shit on DA over the past...*shrug* 6-12 months?? Anyway...I just can't take some of the shit people call art now...like taking a photo of a piece of wood?...what the fuck? No offence to anyone, especially whoever did this piece I'm about to talk about...but the person who "submitted" it for deviation of the day....is just asking for a brick to the head...

...it's a piece...of...WOOD! and whoever "submitted" this thing (not the deviation itself, the "submit" to deviation of the day) says something along the lines of "it's simple. it's spartan...(something or other about it being deep)"...it makes me want to stab myself in the eye with my favorite pen, take a snapshot of it...and call it "the pains of being a writer" or something...then I'll be in TWO shitty categories here...and probably a plethora of noobs, teenie boppers, and failures in life telling me how true it is...and some hidden meaning I wasn't even thinking about portraying, meaning to portray, or caring about portraying...

It's about thought, people...as a writer (or I'm sure painter...don't try and interrupt people who take "snapshots"), you learn to NOT think in the inital "birth to art"...but it takes refining...you have to wipe the blood and goo from that baby after you give birth to it.....(and eventually eat it...yeah, dead baby joke in the middle of my serious rant...heh...by the way: what's red and crawls up your leg? answer at bottom)...so if you actually call something finished art...don't be half-assed about it...it shouldn't be something you can do a dozen of in a day...eh, whatever...I'm done with that.

.....bored...waiting for my text and traditions class to get here in an hour or so...had to read boethius' consolation of philosophy...it's allright...but too damn dull....

...16 days until the 7 1/2 month anniversary of my parents having sex...yeah, I was a premature baby *shrug* somewhere around 7 1/2 months....oh well. I hope I don't have to do anything that weekend...like classwork...*yawns*

I'm gone now....flame me, you emo terrible "deviants" you
-Willum...the Mexican writer who's achieving the dream..."drink yourself to death, THEN get famous" **thumbs up**
P.S. What's red and crawls up your leg?.....a homesick abortion
What's funnier than a dead baby?.....a dead baby in a clown suit
What's blue and yellow, and sits at the bottom of a pool?.....a baby with slashed floaties
What's red and yellow, and sits at the top of a pool?....floaties with a slashed baby.
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?....a douberman in a playground
What did the quadrapelegic baby with downs get for x-mas?.....cancer (or a dead puppy, cancer is funnier though)
What's worse than a trashcan full of dead babies?....the one at the bottom is still alive
...what's worse than that?....he had to eat his way out
....what's worse still, if there is something possible?...he went back for seconds.
How do you make a baby float?...........one scoop ice cream, two scoops baby.


.....FLAME ME! I have thousands of them! **shakes a fist to the sky**

UPDATE: My sister is here now...show her love, unlike you all show me! She is and needs encouragement so she can find her muse.

....*shrug*...now I'm off to get some editting down ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7646479/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7646479/ Thu, 19 Jan 2006 08:27:11 PST
....I know, alot of you older DA members are noticing, as well as I am, the constant and rapid decline into shit on DA over the past...*shrug* 6-12 months?? Anyway...I just can't take some of the shit people call art now...like taking a photo of a piece of wood?...what the fuck? No offence to anyone, especially whoever did this piece I'm about to talk about...but the person who "submitted" it for deviation of the day....is just asking for a brick to the head...

...it's a piece...of...WOOD! and whoever "submitted" this thing (not the deviation itself, the "submit" to deviation of the day) says something along the lines of "it's simple. it's spartan...(something or other about it being deep)"...it makes me want to stab myself in the eye with my favorite pen, take a snapshot of it...and call it "the pains of being a writer" or something...then I'll be in TWO shitty categories here...and probably a plethora of noobs, teenie boppers, and failures in life telling me how true it is...and some hidden meaning I wasn't even thinking about portraying, meaning to portray, or caring about portraying...

It's about thought, people...as a writer (or I'm sure painter...don't try and interrupt people who take "snapshots"), you learn to NOT think in the inital "birth to art"...but it takes refining...you have to wipe the blood and goo from that baby after you give birth to it.....(and eventually eat it...yeah, dead baby joke in the middle of my serious rant...heh...by the way: what's red and crawls up your leg? answer at bottom)...so if you actually call something finished art...don't be half-assed about it...it shouldn't be something you can do a dozen of in a day...eh, whatever...I'm done with that.

.....bored...waiting for my text and traditions class to get here in an hour or so...had to read boethius' consolation of philosophy...it's allright...but too damn dull....

...16 days until the 7 1/2 month anniversary of my parents having sex...yeah, I was a premature baby *shrug* somewhere around 7 1/2 months....oh well. I hope I don't have to do anything that weekend...like classwork...*yawns*

I'm gone now....flame me, you emo terrible "deviants" you
-Willum...the Mexican writer who's achieving the dream..."drink yourself to death, THEN get famous" **thumbs up**
P.S. What's red and crawls up your leg?.....a homesick abortion
What's funnier than a dead baby?.....a dead baby in a clown suit
What's blue and yellow, and sits at the bottom of a pool?.....a baby with slashed floaties
What's red and yellow, and sits at the top of a pool?....floaties with a slashed baby.
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?....a douberman in a playground
What did the quadrapelegic baby with downs get for x-mas?.....cancer (or a dead puppy, cancer is funnier though)
What's worse than a trashcan full of dead babies?....the one at the bottom is still alive
...what's worse than that?....he had to eat his way out
....what's worse still, if there is something possible?...he went back for seconds.
How do you make a baby float?...........one scoop ice cream, two scoops baby.


.....FLAME ME! I have thousands of them! **shakes a fist to the sky** ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7381815/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7381815/ Thu, 22 Dec 2005 11:39:34 PST Secrets and whatever progress I have, I'm gonna post the first three chapters...yay, I know, right?

I don't have any internet for the lappy, though...so I'm going to either find some way to transfer the stuff to this comp, or take it to a trendy cafe downtown so I can steal wireless and post it later...Be warned, if I steal wireless, I have to post all three at once, so don't flame me please...

...look at me, typing as if anyone reads this...or anything of mine *shrug* heh...herry krishnas to all, and to all the head of Jack White....seriously...he looks kinda like the devil.

Anyway...I'll probably steal the coffee shop internet and post it all, because there's a couple things I need to download while I'm at it.

Okay...go be merry, because I couldn't give a shit what religion you are...they all dictate togetherness...except christmas...it's turned into buying people shit....well, buying people expensive, shitty shit...so just don't be a deutschbagge (spelling, I know...it's intentional).
-Willum...herry krishnas!

EDIT: I posted the first chapter, fully edited and whatnot...here:
[link] ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7295675/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7295675/ Mon, 12 Dec 2005 20:06:17 PST
...I made a B in my 5 hour class, yay...and my philosophy class worries me now...I might have a C in it, but worst case scenario, my GPA is 3.0 or higher, so that's no worry...and I made a 100% on my psyc final, so yay...

...My muse went home already, and I'm going home in 2 days...so yay for that, too.

I'm looking forward to getting so much writing done...at the least, I'm going to edit so fucken much of Secrets and a couple chapters of Otherworld...I really just need one of those writer's vacations...where they go out in the middle of nowhere, stay in a cabin and write...that'd be nice.

Note to self: GET OFF YOUR ASS AND GO CHECK THE HOSPITAL TO SEE IF THEY'RE HIRING....you lazy cunt.

Much love
-Willum...I'm mean to myself. ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7219912/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7219912/ Sun, 04 Dec 2005 12:02:25 PST
....Got a big research paper to do, and a LOT of studying...and no time to post any of the writing I've done...(see when I say it like that..."any of the writing" it sounds like a lot, no?...actually just 2 pieces....*shrug* had to shoot myself down before I started flying too high)

*sigh*....I'm pissed off at my dad right now. Really fucken pissed....He was out of work for 2 months...because he had a chunk of his colon removed. Granted he milked it for an extra week for Thanksgiving....but while out of work, he used his saved up sick hours...so he was getting paid for 40 hours a week....for 8 weeks....320 hours of pay...now you may be wondering how much he gets paid....well, he's a mailman, who is a retired Air Force...he's been a mailman for about 5 years.....he gets paid ROUGHLY 20 dollars an hour....so...320 hours....at 20 dollars an hour...6,400 dollars.....for sitting on his ass as it gets fatter from him not working....and he treats me like shit for asking him for some money. Not a hundred dollars or anything, just enough to get gas, some food, and have 20 bucks left in my wallet for emergency....because my checking account has to last until I get a job...and that money is used for emergencies...but my GOD DAMN CARD doesn't work right now....becase the people at this stupid ass school are just plain RETARDED! They sent a letter...to my HOUSE (where I won't get it for a week or 2), saying I didn't sign the "terms and agreements" paper...when I clearly fucken did...TWICE, because the lost it the first time...and the paper said my account would be unable to be used on campus (as in my declining balance for lunch and shit) if I didn't sign the one they sent me within 15 days....I get it to them on the 14th day, and my card is already turned off...now, you have to understand something. My student ID....it is also a checking/debit card for my bank....and those fuckheads turned it all off...so my bank is unreachable now...and I swear to christ I'm going to kill them if it doesn't get working before tomorrow...

anyway....I hate my fucken father because he's greedy...and he tries to "teach me a lesson" by making me suffer through something....and he has no qualms handing out this money to perfect strangers (my friend got 20, my girlfriend got 40, and 20...2 different occasions....)...but I get it? no...it'll spoil me or something....legally, he is worth more to me dead....but I didn't just say that, because that's wrong....not literally....but I guess morally.

On top of that, he belittles me...I'm used to it by now....but this weekend me and Stacy went to Canton, TX for this huge flea market with my friend Cheech and his girlfriend. So we come back and eat dinner with dad before we leave to come back home (because home is where your heart is....and it's definitely not at my father's) and, again, foreword is needed here....I need to see a doctor, because there's something wrong with my arms....it's like I'm a fucken leper...there's a big patch of dry, sore skin on the inside of my left elbow, and on my right wrist there's this rash looking deal on top of my scar from hot sauce (yeah, hot sauce so hot it gave me a chemical burn...ask me if you wanna know the story), another dry patch on the back of my left hand, and about 4 or 5 sores between my two arms. and my knuckles are extremely dry....my right eye is always dry, itchy, and kinda irritated....and I need some sort of medicated chap stick for my lips because regular shit isn't working for some reason.... (there, I said it...I'm starting to look like a sith or something...and on top of that, my tooth that I had to get a cap on from a skating accident 7 years ago is kinda off color from the rest of my teeth...I fucken hate people)....anyway, dad said some stupid ass remark about the shit on my arm...I can't remember it, because I don't want to...but it was offensive....and he kept talking shit during dinner...with my fucking girlfriend right there. I stayed quiet, ate quickly, and couldn't help but saying "you're an ass...and I'm feeling an incredible urge to stab you in the eye", then I quickly packed our shit in the truck and left.

While I was putting the last of the stuff in the back of the truck he came out and said "did I offend you? Is that why you're leaving?"....not in the caring way, but the "did I piss you off, wussy!" way...so I said "we were going to leave tonight anyway....and yes" so we left, and I'm still pissed off at him...


.........anyway. I see I did a good rant there...you don't have to bother with all that, but I guess you read it all if you're at this point right now. *shrug* fuck it, I'm apathetic...and I'm happy being with my muse, so don't worry about me.

I'm going to go work on my paper.
-Willum...**would definitely shoot li... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7061761/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/7061761/ Wed, 16 Nov 2005 08:27:42 PST
...So much work...I don't have time to write...but thanksgiving coming up, God I hope I can churn a pile of work out...considering I have 2 papers to do over the break...one HUGE one, and one les huge one....*sigh*....

.....my relationship is a huge bag of crazy....well, to put it in comical terms, it's 20 gallons of crazy in a 10 gallon hat. I hope she doesn't read this, because she'll worry...but seriously...I'm fucken crazy (some of you know exactly how), and she's a little crazy....but it kind of ecclipses my HUGE amount of crazy to make some death ray.....or something **forgot what he was talking about**

....today's the day I can sleep in...but I did so too much...I woke up at 10, and I have class in half an hour now......I have a huge fucken test Thursday (tomorrow), and the same day I have to turn in a proposal for said HUGE paper...and rewrite a paper for the class I have a test in....luckily, my 2 other classes I took tests in within the last week, and did well on them....so fuck whatever else Im doing in there this week.....it's HELL week, man...hell, week.

**just thought of the movie Platoon**...good movie.

Alright...I'm out of thought for now. Sorry I've been a lazy bastard with my writings...but I can't help it right now...I can't write on my off time because I'm not in the right mindset....so I play videogames occasionally...and that kind of takes up the rest of the off time...then my muse/wife takes some more (not in the bad way though), my friends take up the rest....and studying takes up more than is available....sorry, buddies....that makes no time available...

I PROMISE I will do SOMETHING over the break this next week....

-Willum...scouts honor **bloody hands salute** ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6940084/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6940084/ Wed, 02 Nov 2005 21:39:32 PST
..oh yeah, and tomorrow I'm going to be an extra in a movie HBO is filming here in town...I'm going to be in a RAVE scene...and the movie is starring Tia Moury (spelling...*shrug*)...I guess the other twin didn't wanna do it...the funny thing is I was at one of many Halloween parties last weekend, and she showed up with her little bodyguard guy....I thought it was someone DRESSED as her...I was like "that's kinda original, I guess...but not very creative"...then felt a little dumb when they told me it WAS her, so I said fuck it and drank more whiskey and cheap cola...more whiskey than cola though...BTW, I was Robert Kennedy and my girlfriend was a dead hooker (we won most politically incorrect with that shit), and on Halloween, we went to classes as JFK and Jackie-O, seconds after assassination...everyone liked it...we're the best...worst, couple ever, lol.

I'll try and post a pic or 2 soon...and I'm going to go pass out now, and call time is noon, and I have a 9 AM class...so fuck everything else right now...I need some sleep.
-Willum...**hums a Gabbian chant** ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6862379/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6862379/ Tue, 25 Oct 2005 08:24:03 PDT
...got papers upon papers ot due....and no time for writing damnit....damn girlfriends making you tired with love and sex and whatnot...

...I'll write more soon, I promise. Thanksgiving break will be nothing but writing for me.
-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6570783/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6570783/ Thu, 22 Sep 2005 08:11:12 PDT
....yeah, I've been better for a little while...just too lazy to update.

sorry....
-Willum...**feeling fine** ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6507271/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6507271/ Wed, 14 Sep 2005 21:24:18 PDT
....I'm sick....damn it...

.....dilemma's of going to class or not going to class....fuck

-Willum...god damn my eyelids are so hot.... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6437372/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6437372/ Tue, 06 Sep 2005 23:40:27 PDT


....another short post. Went to Sport-a-Pack for a couple rounds, then went to the Ramada Inn for a Japanese punk band called Peelander-Z...and they were FUCKING. AWESOME....PERIOD!



First this band (2 guys) named Bones plays......and they kinda sucked. No offence to anyone who is, but they looked like retarded (as in "Baby has Downs" retarded) Mormons...and he sung something about his peepee, and playing with it, and smoking weed and seeing a monkey jerking off while he was making out with some chick, and the monkey turned him on.....*shrug* it was inaudible mostly...and he played the same 4 chords on bass, and the drummer kept staring at him to see his cues for shit....*shrug*...OH YEAH!...a toked out trannsexual (named Chris, for anyone who cares) was going nuts dancing in front of the stage.



....so after that fiasco...PEELANDER-Z set up, and started their show...WHICH WAS THE FUCKING GREATEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN.....crazy shit!...one point they did a song called Steak and they rock out, and the lead singer, The Toothless Man, AKA Peelander Yellow, says "punk rock jump!" and they synchronized jump...then he says (keep in mind he's Asian)..."Oh, I'm getting so very hungry" and they have signs, held up by The Lord of the Wrestling Ring, AKA Peelander blue (I think), and one side said "STEAK" and the other side said "MEDIUM RARE" and Toothless Man screams "How would you like to eat your steak!!!?" and everyone in the audience screams "MEDIUM RARE!!!" and throws up the horns, fists, or whatever you wanted (we threw up the Shocker a few times)...and then the finale of the first set was fucking insane...they had people come up and they 5-second taught them the chords and drums they were playing, and Peelander Red (I can't remember his name, damnit) jumps off the stage and they have people playing, and The Lord of the Wrestling Ring throws up a sign that says "DON'T THINK TOO MUCH" on one side, and "JUST FEEL" on the other...and it was fucking insane!....they set up bowling pins, and Red and Yellow got down while Pink (their promo chick) held a spotlight for them...and then Lord of the Wrestling Ring held up a sign that said "LET'S BOWL!" and they set up 6 pins and Red threw Yellow into them in the audience...and everyone's still playing and rocking out....good God it was a fucken joygasm....seriously.



...we came back right after their 2nd set was over (we had to escape Rev's stalker and drop Stacy off because she has a yoga class in the morning), and me and Quirk got drumsticks (from the rocking out) and had everyone sign them....fucking awesome night.



......guess it was a little longer than I expected...*shrug*...night, I'm gonna go shower.

-Willum...oh, I bought 2 of their CD's, P-Bone Steak and another one (Stacy took it to her room for me)(edit: Dancing Friendly is what it's called)...go to

[link]



...GOODNIGHT! ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6324280/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6324280/ Thu, 25 Aug 2005 11:27:58 PDT
...I've found a muse...she's the greatest*sigh*...
Gone now.
-Willum...much love ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6265133/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6265133/ Thu, 18 Aug 2005 19:42:14 PDT
....packing everything. Done with the Lappy and all my movies, games, etc....now I have to do laundry, including the sheets I bought for my bed. That and get everything around the house...towels...toiletries, etc...

Can't wait...but I don't want to as much now...friends and people telling me they'll miss me and whatnot. *shrug*...haven't been worrying about anything...now I have about a dozen people telling me every day or so they're going to miss me and I'll be GONE....as in...well, NOT THERE...odd thing having people kind of transition into the "you don't exist anymore" mode a couple days before you ARE gone...

...and C'MON, I'm moving an HOUR away!...*shrug*...people. That's all I got to say on that one.

...well, actually that's all I have to say period. Goodnight for now.
-Willum...bored...packing a little more ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6174174/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6174174/ Tue, 09 Aug 2005 00:05:45 PDT
...too long without writing...I'm starting to feel a dragging melancholy...well, simply, I'm feeling down. I really need to write more...I'm feeling a little useless, and my thinking has been off...more abundant, yet out there...just weird sometimges. I'm also seeing visions alot, like my imagination goes into overdrive and makes me daydream for a bit...

...note to self: buy pocket notepads...all out. Wash truck and check oil, etc...haven't in a while.

...the only thing keeping me from going insane has been Katamari Damacy. That horribly simple, yet completely awesome game from Japan, with simple dubs and 20 gallons of crazy in a 10 gallon hat. You only use the 2 joysticks (this is on PS2 and DS only, by the way, PS2 for me...) and all you do is roll up stuff in a giant ball, called a Katamari. The story is the King of All Cosmos (your father) destroyed the stars without realizing it, so you gotta collect junk on earth to fix them (well, make new ones). You start out small, but eventually have to roll over the ENTIRE earth for the final level....picking up giant squids, buildings, jumbomans (some giant robot), clouds, tornados (eventually), people (hilarious...they scream horribly), trees....islands....EVERYTHING! It's simplicity is its genius...and by God, it's GENIUS and a great thing...so shell out 20 bucks (or less, if you have one of those smaller game shops, or don't mind used)...and wait until November, when the sequel, We Love (Heart) Katamari...which will probably also be 20 bucks upon release like this one...do it, you'll love it....unless you're a Communist.

...I'm done now...I'm gonna go force some writing, even if it is bad to force it...because I need to get back on the path...I've been wondering (yes, I'm aware of the spelling) too much....*sigh*
-Willum...I need a drink...throat's...so...dryyy... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6033217/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/6033217/ Mon, 25 Jul 2005 18:55:05 PDT
...Yes, I know, it saddens me, too...all the time I have and it just own't come to me...STILL. Ive just given up; the only way to stir my writing now is to basically be engulfed in flames by setting deadlines to write something, or edit Secrets. For instance, I'll kick myself to get so many pages done by Friday...and it usually ends up, I gleefully write all of them the night before on and after midnight.

...yes, I said, gleefully...forgive me.

Well...besides my writing (or lack thereof), my life's doing allrig-...wait, it's not going allright *sigh*. It's....there *said almost hopefully*...It's just not...anything...worthwhile, I suppose. Just waiting....finding things. I found this offer on my college look-for-ways-to-get-me-money search engine (very good stuff...I can't wait to apply to some more of the writing and poetry type scholarships...getting money for writing?....wow)...anywho, the offer is 500 dollars to write a blog 2 times a week of 250 words each for 6 months. I know...no sweeter gig than that, right?

....this could be my first opportunity to get paid to write...except for those 2 instances where I wrote a poem for a friend to express love in words he couldn't find (...I know, I'm such a martyr, sacrificing my soul for some kind of chivalry...*shrug*), and for another kid's English class.

....I've spoken too much already. Go have fun...I'm still in this damned writing funk. Have fun.
-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5967134/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5967134/ Mon, 18 Jul 2005 10:37:25 PDT
...I had a medical list of problems (not literally medical, but medical problems always come in lists...whatever)...but now it's had a good cut on it...so I'm doing better...

....the bigger problems still remain...but I can deal with a couple of them....I just need to quit being stuck in this funk on writing....I don't have time to do nothing...damn it all.

*shrug*....I need a drink.
-Willum...a little better every day ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5946255/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5946255/ Fri, 15 Jul 2005 21:44:20 PDT
....*sigh*...fuck. I just...

....fuck it.
-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5846541/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5846541/ Tue, 05 Jul 2005 11:18:34 PDT
.....We went to the largest flea market in the world on the way...in Canton. I bought 2 copies of the death of superman comic...one the normal, opened one...and one the commemorative one that comes with the comic, some commemorative stamps, a poster, the mourning black armband, and a print of the obituary in the Daily Planet, unopened...

....yeah, I know that's kinda geeky, but fuck you nay-sayers....*shrug* I might try to put it on Ebay or something.....*shrug again* or I might tear it open and ruin it's "market value"....heheheh...funny shit, yeah....

....I'm going to go unpack, take a shower, and get some lunch....
-Willum....*yawn* ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5805197/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5805197/ Thu, 30 Jun 2005 19:27:17 PDT
.....that's all. *shrug* I'll have the lappy...but only for typing and editting on Secrets and whatnot....so.....

.....see ya in a week.
-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5777692/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5777692/ Tue, 28 Jun 2005 01:50:13 PDT ....a tad bit hungry...not so much, though...
....THIRSTY!...GAH!
...about to go to bed...I know, I'm surprised, too. It's only 3:50....really early for me.
...going insane...
....correcting myself...AM insane...
...impatient, I'm going down to my mother's house this weekend, and the final issues are being ironed out tonight, at a BBQ...
...going to bed now...
...-Willum....so thirsty.... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5305888/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5305888/ Sat, 25 Jun 2005 01:49:42 PDT
...Alright, no bullshit anymore. Some of you who are reading this...yes, you **points** you know who you are...You see this!? All of this? Everything under these words...that list? The picture? The submissions? The little facts sheet above? **points up**...this is my MIND. Everything that is here is exactly where it belongs...NOWHERE ELSE! If you don't like it...GET OUT OF MY MIND! Be glad any frustrations I have over ANYTHING stay here....and here ALONE. I let the fury burn here...in this bonfire safely in my mind, so it doesn't turn into a raging forest fire...where the forest is OUTSIDE...

...now pay close attention to this little bit...

....Projection is a keen tool of the writer, the painter...the sadist, the masochist...the arsonist, the rapist...the killer, the poet...and of me. I fit into some of these categories...you know them, you don't know them. This is MY MIND, remember that...I PROJECT annoyances and grief...hatred, pure rage, every mundane problem that makes me pissed off...into here...and whatever vessel I come across that makes that glass overflow...it all gets poured out onto the head of that topic....
...to put it simply...everything that makes me angry throughout the day, week, or month....it builds up. Why? Because I'm an angry person...I accept that, I nurture it, and I let it fester sometimes...until finally something comes along, and it's just a LITTLE thing that makes everything topple...and the thing that's at the top immediately focuses EVERYTHING towards it....

...If you're still not getting it....DON'T TAKE THIS FUCKING SERIOUSLY! THIS IS *MY* *MIND*...I PUT HERE WHAT I *DON'T* WANT SOME PEOPLE TO SEE...SO AGAIN...IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT...GET. OUT. OF. MY. MIND!

-Willum...I'm thirsty...and kinda exhausted now...
P.S....don't ask for an apology...or atonement...I have to seek that on my own....**gone**
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Update:

......wondering if people actually read my journal posts anymore since I started keeping the advisory at top....*shrug* oh well, if not....then nuts to them.

....more editting getting done. A couple short prose submitted, and I need to write an other chapter of Otherworld, along with the three or four ideas I have and need to incorporate in it.

....thinking about another book. Why the hell you might be asking....well, why is because this will be a work of slight unfiction.....with a slight creativity to it...maybe a screenplay. It's going to be a biography (of sorts) of a couple kids (well, not really kids, they were kids...and in biographies that's where you start)...so anyway, it's an interview (of sorts...again), and I'm not going to divulge MANY details now...or soon, because I still have to write Otherworld of course. But I'm going to call it "5 Hours With a Stranger"....nice title? I actually think so, because it came to me in a daze while I was thinking of something to write...so just know I got something up there festering into a book....or something....maybe a tumor....

Going down to my grandmother's house in a week with a couple friends (2, maybe 3 if we can get ahold of him!), for 5-6 days....that'll be good for getting out of this city...it sucks you in. Plan on taking the Lappy and getting a lot of stuff done while not driving and being down there in general....**crosses his fingers**

...that's enough for now. Have fun.....and that's whatever you were talking about for ya.
-Willum....the Mexican who doesn't need sleep....sleep is for babies and the dead... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5284719/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5284719/ Fri, 06 May 2005 13:02:52 PDT
Took the English/Literature AP test yesterday...yeah, it was kinda easy, but I rushed through the 3 essays so I could leave...had to go a good 25-30 minute drive to Haughton for their little health fair for CNA...*sigh*.

I did a couple of "projects" for a certain great friend of mine...I'll scan the 2 paper-style ones and submit them...I've been thinking about doing this for a little while, and she gave me the initiative, so many more thanks and much more love to her...cuz I did it for her birthday, and I'll wait a week or so and submit them...to not ruin the suprise.

Doo do doo do do doo doo...boredom.
I said I was going to start my new novel yesterday...but when I finally sat down and said "NOW...I write"....I didn't write. So I was thinking anywhere between 2 and 4 AM tonight....*shrug* you know I don't sleep...it's wasteful and boring...

Done now...I gotta go see a friend and finish up that package for that special twin of mine...(yes Ximena, you! you can giggle because I said package...lol*shrug*)
-Willum, the Mexican that is still glad he finally finished his other story...oh yeah, I finished the overall editting (making it all the same font and size and whatnot) and it's 185 pages...woohoo. Now I just have to spend those boring June nights editting it all the way. All my work will then me complete...aww crap, I'm ranting again *GONE NOW*

Edit: the title is because our dumbass cha's and daddy's money's voted WHITESNAKE-HERE I GO AGAIN......as our Senior song....Christ! Unless we're going to have stripper's come down on streamer's like a SWAT crew during graduation....NO. That and c'mon, they could probably call them up and they'd PLAY it for us...they're all HAS BEENS now...*sigh* stupid other 2 factions of the senior class ruining the lived of our apathetic, yet pissed 3rd faction...

Oh yeah, that *points up* and I wanted to say that Secrets will be alot longer when I'm done editting...I'm going to lengthen the first 10 chapters or so...and overall, it'll probably be about 220 pages...maybe a little less (gotta aim high you know...)*gone for real now...* ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5266929/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5266929/ Wed, 04 May 2005 16:37:21 PDT
...I start my newest story either today or tomorrow...

...goodbye.
-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5258624/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5258624/ Tue, 03 May 2005 17:33:36 PDT
**looked through 2 big binders of pictures**...I noticed something. It doesn't really bug me...just gets me to thinking....

There's almost a full binder of photos before I was born...with my mom, Pops, and my sister Brandi (8 years older than me...we have different dads). I was looking at said photo album...and there are so many happy photos. Pops was slim, or slimmer in some later cases, and handsome, my mom looked happy with him and my sister...and they were all just really happy.....even though Pops had a mustache (who thought that was a cool thing?...well, he's an easy rider, so whatever...)...

...After I was born...there's happy photos at first...'cuz I'm a baby...and families should be happy in photos with babies....anyway...eventually, the phots are farther apart in time...and when I was in 2nd grade my parents divorced...and from there, there aren't any more photos.................

...I don't want to hear that crap "it's not your fault...it's not to do with you"...I don't know what I'm ranting about...my parents' divorce or the fact everyone's happiness started steadily declining shortly after I was born...I can vaguely remember being in kindergarten and shortly before of them fighting in the living room...and my sister would take me into her room and we'd play board games or with dolls (yeah, I played with dolls...if you had a sister who was 8 years older than you, you would too...so shit on you) and they'd be yelling...alot.

The one time I remember clear as crystal....I was in 1st grade, and my sister had a friend over to spend the night...I think my mom was drunk...or drinking, or whatever...and her and my dad were arguing like crazy...and at one point my dad calls me, so I go to the living room. He kneels down and grabs my shoulder (not harshly...just in the telling way...) and says "you know' I'LL always love you, right?"....I started crying and ran back to my sister...and she held me...........why am I remembering, much less reliving this?.....*sigh* **indifferent...I don't cry...not anymore**


...........I've lost all reason as to why I started typing this......*oh well*...I guess look for some random pictures....*shrug*
-sometimes you just don't wanna.... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5243260/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5243260/ Mon, 02 May 2005 00:50:42 PDT
...My God it feels so fucking tremendous...last chapter is done...only thing left is a finale chapter X to close it out, drop the curtains, and raise the lights...

*sigh* fucking temendous...again.
-Willum..DONE, BITCHES!

Last Chapter here...
35-Red Sky-pt. 1-[link]
35-Red Sky-pt. 2-[link]
35-Red Sky-pt. 3-[link]

P.S...Give me some love!! God dammit I want to be loved...so give it!! **hug to anyone who wants it**NOW... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5148704/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5148704/ Thu, 21 Apr 2005 13:09:12 PDT
Mood: *shrug*
Listening to: Natural Anthem-Postal Service right now
Reading: ...either Paradisium or Through the Looking Glass
Watching: ...Fight Club

So...2nd of three parts is submitted on my final issue...I only have about 4-5 pages left to type. THEN THAT'S IT, BITCHES. Well...a finale, only because I feel it'd be nice and a good afterword...but THAT'S IT, again, BITCHES!

...I've got so much planned for Otherworld...it's gonna be good, trust me...

I guess I'm done now...I'm just fucking with these special privileges...

-Willum...FUCK...I said it!

Bloobity bloobity blah...here's the latest...LAST issue of Secrets

part 1-[link]
part 2-[link] ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5141451/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5141451/ Wed, 20 Apr 2005 17:45:04 PDT
...but I guess it's true that pain and discomfort brings art. I'm going to be done with pages 5-8 (or 9, I have a spot I'm going to seperate to submit here) and I'll submit it when I'm done...

...and it's completely done in my head, and I must say I'm very proud. I need to hurry and type the rest out so I can get it in its prime...

...be warned. After I'm done, MAJOR editting is going to be done between the 1st and the 20th issues...I repeat, MAJOR editting between 1-20...mainly content and overall length...it's going to be longer, better, and more precise to the plot. Believe me, it's for the best. If you Absolutely want a copy of something or other...probably the entire story before editting when I first finish and after editting probably towards the end of the summer, then email me at WWonka9484@yahoo.com and we can work something out...*shrug* it's like preaching to hobos...you think they're there, but in actuality they're drinking their change away in front of their carboard boxes...

Anything else? Hmmm...ahh yes, I'll probably do the first 2 chapters of Otherworld before I start editting Secrets too heavily...and I guess that's it. *sigh* I'm ready to graduate...one month and counting...

Gone now...typing.
-Willum...ALMOST DONE, MA!! ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5062913/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5062913/ Mon, 11 Apr 2005 17:32:11 PDT being the great badass he is...has given the last chapter a soul...

I'm running on all 12 cylinders now...all 2 tracks, all systems go...all ammo full, and the body counts reset for best mileage...

...I'm workin, bitches!
-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5030195/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/5030195/ Fri, 08 Apr 2005 17:30:46 PDT
...perras tonto...esa me trae sin cuidado.

............

...Yeah, just practicing...I gotta finish learning...I'm understanding more than I can speak...*shrug* half my family keeps saying I should learn Spanish and speak it and be proud...the other half says I should just learn if I have time...and that I'm among the first to go to college...so I've done well enough WITHOUT it...*sigh* I still need to learn...

Sorry for no more story...I swear to Christ I can't find the time to do it...I'm about to mutilate myself so I'm strung up in bed, so I HAVE to type it...that and I have TWO, not 1...DOUBLE THAT, novel-stories I have to write...I literally HAVE TO. They're sitting up in my head, and I have 2 pocket notepads FULL of material for them...specifics, character bio, chapter ideas, settings, descriptions...dammit I need to get my ass in gear...

...I need love...

...Sorry, had to get that out...pay it no mind. **strums his fingers on his desk**...well, I guess that's all. I tried to type some out, but nothing came...oh, and a request...gimme a title. For the last chapter; I have a paragraph or two, but I need a title. The last one was Jude, for the Bible reference (last book before Revelations...), and I need an apocolyptical title...I was going to name it simply apokolups (sp...I know, too lazy to remember/look it up) for the Latin apocalypse...please help, title's give the soul a name...and without a name, a soul can't settle. Something classy, if you can. Hopefully, much thanks.

...estoy fuera.
-LUM...much love.

edit: silly french motherfucker...trying to hack my computer. Anybody wanna fuck with this froggy prick...

82.224.108.12

...I love my security. Just pops up and tells me these things...and asks if I want their information...to which I say "hells yes", and poof...there it was "France...blah blah, wee wee...all his french information"

That's all...If you are French (French Canadian is all cool, though), do not partake in the reading of my material...because I couldn't care less...the only good Frenchman was Volltaire...and that's because he was as smartass and evil as can be...not pompous.

Again...I'M OUT, BITCHES! ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/4604987/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/4604987/ Thu, 17 Feb 2005 08:35:16 PST
-Willum... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/4346818/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/4346818/ Mon, 17 Jan 2005 20:30:26 PST
...Check this person out! because I said so. She is my friend Gabby, but not the French Canadian buddy Gabby, the Hispanic from Texas Gabby...so if you know French Canadian Gabby, here's another one who is my friend, so be nice and go send her a hello and a comment or 2...because if you don't, you're a dirty communist!

-Willum, the- GAH, MY HEAD!! I got a headache from playing Vampire: The Masquerade-Bloodlines on PC...I'm a video game whore...and now I suffer... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/4132613/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/4132613/ Thu, 23 Dec 2004 00:58:13 PST
-Willum...the "it's not gonna get done....I gotta find some time to copy and paste it, and I DON'T have time right now, because I'm working 78 hours this week (that's not a typo either...)..."Mexican ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/4011713/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/4011713/ Tue, 07 Dec 2004 14:26:03 PST [link]

... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3984318/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3984318/ Sat, 04 Dec 2004 00:45:47 PST ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3984194/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3984194/ Sat, 04 Dec 2004 00:11:09 PST
You guys haven't, by chance...seen my story, have you?? **bites his lip**..........

....because...uh...I can't find it...I seriously can't

Awww Jesus...dammit, dammit, dammit!!!!

If there's a new journal right after this one with a bunch of dots...that means I'm fucked...

*sigh* fuck... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3959624/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3959624/ Tue, 30 Nov 2004 20:11:00 PST
*shrugs* my research paper's done.........and now I'm reading Pride and Prejudice for my Literature class...but in another 2 weeks I'll be out for Christmas...and I GUARANTEE I'll be done and WELL into editting by New Years...

...gonna go watch my Stephen Lynch: Live at The El Rey DVD now...goodbye.
-Willum, the Mexican who can finally stay awake at night...seriously. For the past 2 months I've been dead tired...and slept ALOT. Last night I stayed up til 3, then woke up at 6:30 like NORMAL...YAY! ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3779506/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3779506/ Sun, 07 Nov 2004 19:06:19 PST
...you're probably saying to yourself "He's copping out...making excuses for possibly not making his deadline." Well, I have t do a research paper, an essay, read half of The Poisonwood Bible (all for my Literature class), and a shitload of clinical preparation (for my CNA [certified nurses assistant] class), and currently have to compile a bunch of shit for college, finish memorizing my lines for the play next week, and make money to save so I can have money when I need it...and I shall need it by X-mas.

So...many burdens=delayed novel. I'm sorry...a thousand times, many of which are to myself and the evil dwelling in my mind (laugh if you'd like...it's really loud in my head...and kinda chaotic for the most part), and I promise it'll be done within a month or so...I SWEAR it WILL be done when my research papers and essays and preparations and book readings are behind me...*sigh* I'm shit...

-Willum, the Mexican who is falling apart at the seams...well, scratch that. He's falling apart, ripping new seams....... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3328102/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/3328102/ Thu, 09 Sep 2004 20:10:55 PDT
I'm playing Silent Hill 4 right now...don't expect anything from me for the next week or two...yes, that means the final issues as well.

BUT..I do have a slew (sp...) of gorey pictures from the disaster drill this year. If you look to your left (if you're on my main page...if you clicked this from your devwatch, shame on you...go to my main page and see what is to the left) you'll notice me with a gashed cheek...that was last year. This year it's an.....eh, I'll let you see when I get the pictures developed...until then...anticipation!

-Willum, the Mexican trapped in his room....of DOOM! ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2946576/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2946576/ Fri, 23 Jul 2004 01:26:42 PDT one )

Anyways, I'm almost well into issue 34, and I must say there is a fairly good amount of plot and action and whatnot, so you guys are gonna like it...those of you that read it. BUT I'm not going to post it when I finish it **dodges the stones and random objects thrown at him**. I'm going to finish all THREE issues...yep, there's THREE more including 34. So there's 34, 35, and the Afterword I suppose...not really an afterword, but a "whatever the hell it's called you put after as an ultimate type conclusion"...one of those. Anyways, I'm going to finish those three, than probably post them in their respective order of each half issue...with probably 2 days between each issue...

Than after it's all done, I'll do something special for some people...take a break (though I don't deserve one, I know...) and then start EDITING. That will include greatly lengthening the first dozen issues by about 4 pages per issue average...Some changing around so all of my plot makes sense (because I've read things that contradict...though I doubt it's even noticable...I'm going to be tough on myself...like always)

Alright, done now...it's 3:30 in the morning, my throat is dry, I'm hungry, and my jaw is sore as hell because the pain killers I took haven't kicked in...and to top it off, I'm too fucken hyper and giddy and chatty and whatnot. Goodnight to all.
-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2833475/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2833475/ Thu, 08 Jul 2004 13:02:35 PDT
...I have a problem with that. I've only LOVED 2 females in my life. The first was when I was in middle school. Her name was Crystal, and I knew her for about 5 to 6 years before we became a couple. It was all good times, and we would constantly sit places and just be there...together. After seven months (that's a long ass time when you're in middle school...) I thought everything was great, and it WAS. BUT....yes, there's always a but, things started getting a little bumoy. I tried my hardest to spend more time with her, because it was I believe the summertime, and my father was out of town, so I was staying with my sister, and since we're both young, we don't have much means for transportation. So after much careful planning, my sister was going to take us to the theater, and I had everything planned, money saved, the whole nine yards...then on the day or 2 before, I found out it was her grandmother's 90th birthday that day, so I was cool with postponing it 2 weeks (because that was the next available date)...so the NIGHT before, I'm uber happy at my sister's house and whatnot...and I'm talking with her on the phone, and we were both happy, and she said to hold on, because there was a knock on the door. I heard some little chit chat, and she came back and said...:

"Hey, (I can't remember he name...some friend of hers), just came by and invited me to her birthday party tomorrow, so I don't think we can go to the movies tomorrow..."

I kinda sat there a moment, wondering what the hell just happened...a MONTH of planning, and my patience, all for her...wasted in about 5 minutes.

"So...you're going to that tomorrow...? Okay, I guess I'll talk to you later, I'm going to go now..." and I hung up. I couldn't see her any more. We met through our church, and I haven't been back to that church but 3 times, 2 for Christmas services, and 1 for my sister, when she started finding religion again...I wrote her a letter telling her I was going ton see her anymore, I started going to a different church, then stopped because that church was very fake...if you know what I mean by that. I only talked to her 1 more time after I broke up with her, and that was when my best friend said she wanted to talk to me.

I called, with no real intent of fixing anything...she seemed fine enough, I could tell she was hurt, but after talking a few minutes...she brought up her friends, or cousin, or both...something that was unimportant to the conversation, and was basically blowing me off again...in mid conversation...so I broke away and hung up...and haven't talked to her since.

So...the other was KB, but that story's alot shorter. I fell in love, very stupidly. We got really close...I went aaway, out of town for vacation, and when I came back...we were nothing to each other. It was like she didn't know me...so I eventually siad fuck it, and stopped caring...and we haven't talked since...


Don't ask me why I put all this here...it just kinda came out...maybe I can learn from it....maybe I'm just a pathetic writer...I need to kinda just get rid of all those obsessed in love writings and whatnot...

...holy shit, I have to get dressed and go to work...damn rants and losing track of time.
-willum... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2812847/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2812847/ Mon, 05 Jul 2004 21:16:09 PDT
...I came down here to Texas (about 6 hour drive, not TOO bad) for the 4th of July to see some family...I promised I'd get the rest of 33 underway and done...and I will shortly after coming home.

Getting my wisdom teeth removed next week or two...so that'll gimme some days off to do alot of writing...but I'm not quite sure how it'll be affected by drugs...well, oh well, nevermind with that oen *shrug*

Gone now...nephews and relative kids screaming and playing and crying and hurting and falling and screaming and yelling...damn kids.

-Willum ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2636487/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2636487/ Fri, 11 Jun 2004 13:07:32 PDT
I promise to all you guys and myself that I'll write more and put all the things I've already written up here for all of you to do with what you will...

I'm going to go now...my LJ needs updating after a month...it feels like it was longer than that...I was really bored in my insomnia nights...

Gone now. Love to you guys.
-Willum, the Mexican who loves you...still ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2035229/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/2035229/ Thu, 18 Mar 2004 07:17:29 PST ...here goes:

1. WHAT TIME DO YOU GET UP? 6:30 for school...I'm always up by 8 no matter what...I don't sleep much.

2. IF YOU COULD EAT LUNCH WITH ONE FAMOUS PERSON, WHO WOULD IT BE? Tim Burton...just talk about his crazy visions...maybe Danny Elfmon shows up with his latest music score.

3. GOLD OR SILVER? Silver.

4. WHAT WAS THE LAST FILM YOU SAW AT THE CINEMA? Butterfly Effect? I believe it was that...good movie.

5.WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW? Hmm...the views on Adult Swim? (was Invader Zim, but that's gone now...)

6. WHAT DO YOU HAVE FOR BREAKFAST? not sure...last time I did I think it was a PB and J...I'd love to have biscuits and gravy, though...

7. WHO WOULD YOU HATE TO BE STUCK IN A ROOM WITH? somebody who wants to kill me slowly?...or somebody who constantly sings...(heheh, Hitler...**shakes his head**)

8. CAN YOU TOUCH YOUR NOSE WITH YOUR TONGUE? No...and I probably looked funny trying it in this library...

9. WHAT INSPIRES YOU? Music...and gently breezes out in fields at night.

10. WHAT IS YOUR MIDDLE NAME? Alberto!...sometimes it's just Albert *shrug*

11. BEACH, CITY, OR COUNTRY? beach

12. FAVORITE ICE CREAM? cookie dough!

13. BUTTER, PLAIN OR SALTED POPCORN? Butter

14. FAVORITE COLOR? Dark, shiny blue...

15. FAVORITE CAR? 1968 El Camino prostreet...with above color.

16. FAVORITE SANDWICH FILLING? Peanut Butter...with Jelly

17. WHAT CHARACTERISTIC DO YOU DESPISE? Caring too much...and caring too little.

18. FAVORITE FLOWER? The kind that looks pretty...

19. IF YOU HAD A BIG WIN IN THE LOTTERY, HOW LONG WOULD YOU WAIT TO TELL PEOPLE? Until I'd bought what I've always wanted...do these friends not see the news?

20. FIZZY OR STILL WATER AS A DRINK? Fizzy...

21. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR BATHROOM? What color ISN'T my bathroom? Horrendous wallpaper made of other wallpaper fragments...and blue.

22. HOW MANY KEYS ON YOUR KEY RING? Four.

23. WHERE WOULD YOU RETIRE TO? some rural place in Mexico...maybe on one of those cliffs with a huge house that overlook the ocean.

24. CAN YOU JUGGLE? No...

25. FAVORITE DAY OF THE WEEK? The one that has the most fun...

26. RED OR WHITE WINE? White...

27. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY?My best birthday to date...friends, then went to Bennigans.

29. SAY SOMETHING NICE ABOUT THE DEVIANT YOU COPIED THIS FROM: He is the epitome of badass.

30. WHO DO YOU LEAST EXPECT WILL COPY THIS?
Anyone...

31. PERSON YOU EXPECT WILL COPY THIS FIRST? Nobody... ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1868019/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1868019/ Wed, 18 Feb 2004 17:29:41 PST
Go visit me! Do it now! I miss you...please? FINE! Go away...blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

I need to enter one of my poems for some contest for Creative Writing...I'm off to look through my gallery!

Goodbye
-Willum

GO HERE NOW!:[link] ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1784523/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1784523/ Mon, 02 Feb 2004 18:18:58 PST
I want to finish these drugs so I can go to the gym and work out...I feel so damn lazy. **shakes a fist at his damn ears for getting fucked up** I always knew they were against me...

That was stupid...I'm going to go. MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 2 DAYS (Wednesday, the 4th)...Mmmm, banana cake...

I'm going to do some random shit and hopefully talk to my best friend Carrie because I love her and she makes me feel so good when I talk to her...*sigh again*

I'm out...
-Willum, the bad side effect Mexican
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Go to my Livejournal...if you want. If not, then don't...dammit [link] ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1784418/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1784418/ Mon, 02 Feb 2004 18:00:29 PST
I want to finish these drugs so I can go to the gym and work out...I feel so damn lazy. **shakes a fist at his damn ears for getting fucked up** I always knew they were against me...

That was stupid...I'm going to go. MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 2 DAYS (Wednesday, the 4th)...Mmmm, banana cake...

I'm going to do some random shit and hopefully talk to my best friend Carrie because I love her and she makes me feel so good when I talk to her...*sigh again*

I'm out...
-Willum, the bad side effect Mexican ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1758067/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1758067/ Wed, 28 Jan 2004 17:29:29 PST
I almost fell asleep while typing...then I get bored, then tired again, then I get all stoned...then calm and tired again.

I don't know anything to say...I'm about to go get something to drink...these pills are great.

Have fun
-Willum
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I have a livejournal! It's at [link] ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1706025/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1706025/ Mon, 19 Jan 2004 10:19:52 PST
I fell in love with my best friend...and Christ help me, I can't take it...she's dating someone (even if he is a jackass) and I don't want to hurt her...she's come to me for so many problems and so much advice. And I know she loves me, but it's more of a " I'm better than a friend" love...I want to cry right now, but I can't...**starting to get kinda angry at himself**

I'm going to stop before I brood on it more...

Quote of the entry:
"I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you,
I know you were right, believing for so long."
(bonus points for name of the band...*sniff*) ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1697637/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1697637/ Sat, 17 Jan 2004 20:58:37 PST
Not much else to say. About to submit the story and poem along with it. *sniff*

I love you guys **hugs to everyone he loves** ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1670198/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1670198/ Mon, 12 Jan 2004 18:18:13 PST [link]

Mood: bummed and tired...

Listening to: just watched a George Carlin comedy special...sadly fell asleep toward the end *sigh*

Thoughts: I'm really pissed off and tired at the same time...my ears still fucking with me, and I too tired to be really angry about anything..and that makes me bummed.

I'm gonna go now...changing up some colors and whatnot on my LJ page. ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1660989/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1660989/ Sat, 10 Jan 2004 22:48:41 PST
Mood: anxious and frustrated!

Listening to: shitty late night television...holy shit, I just forgot what I was watching by thinking about this...*shrug*

Thoughts: I CAN'T FUCKEN STAND AOL ANYMORE! It won't let me sign up for a livejournal account...and half my windows won't load!...I need help...

Important stuff: Nothing...I need a new computer...and a new internet...FUCK!

I'm leaving...probably going to write a little...ONE MORE THING! MY FUCKING LEFT EAR IS RINGING AND I'M PARTIALLY DEAF IN IT...**rubs it like crazy**

Quote:
"...WHAT!?" ]]> ~sappy-fire http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1632349/ http://sappy-fire.deviantart.com/journal/1632349/ Mon, 05 Jan 2004 07:56:03 PST
!!! INSTRUCTIONS: !!!
1. Copy this whole list into your journal.
2. Bold the things that are true about you.
3. Whatever you don't bold are false

--
orig. from from `carrie

[[ ~Raz-X- ]]
--

01. When I was younger I made some bad decisions
02. I don't watch much TV these days
03. I love psychodelic mushrooms
04. I love sleeping
05. I have loads of books
06. I once slept in a toilet
07. I love playing video games
08. I adore marijuana
09. I watch porn movies
10. I watch them with my father
11. I like sharks
12. I love spiders, I think they're adorable, especially the ones with bright colours on their backs
13. I was born without hair and I still have no hair
14. I like J. Bush (George W. Bush?)
15. People are cool.
16. I have changed a lot mentally over the last year
17. I have jacuzzi and a Porsche
18. I have a lot to learn
19. I carry my knife everywhere with myself
20. I'm really really smart!
21. I've never broken someone's bones
22. I have a secret
23. I hate snow
24. I drink only milk
25. Punk rock rules!
26. I hate Bill Gates!
27. I love Chinese food
28. I would hate to be famous
29. I am not a morning person
30. I wear glasses
31. I don't need glasses, except sunglasses
32. I have potential
33. I'm pure Japanese
34. My legs are two different sizes
35. I have a twin(mentally)
36. I wear a padded bra
37. I can ramble on about absolutely nothing
38. I'm left-handed
39. I hate llamas, but I'm one of them
40. I don't like horror movies
41. I suck at climbing, but I love it anyway
42. People hate me usually.
43. I love pop music
44. I hardly ever go to bed before midnight
45. I hate parking fines
46. I know national anthem of my country by heart
47. I know more than two languages
48. I spend too much time on the computer
49. I often want to throw out the computer in a window
50. I live on a ground floor
51. I don't like chocolate
52. I'd like to be more original
53. I've lied
54. Cocks are my favorite birds
55. I want to conquer the world
56. I wonder what happens when you die
57. I've read all books about Harry Potter
58. Eat your dog!
59. I love to exercise.
60. I hate chemistry with a passion
61. I love to write!
62. I like changes!
63. I hate going to class
64. I am afraid to die
65. I hate dish washing
66. My hair is long, brown, and incredibly curly
67. My nails are nine inch long
68. My favorite color is black
69. I like to sleep on the floor
70. I am hopeless at cooking
71. I sucked my thumb when I was little.
72. I should be doing somehting else rather than writing this
73. I am online a lot, but not in MSN
74. I hate government
75. I don't have a girlfriend/boyfriend
76. I'm too nice for my own good.
77. I love to read, I read as much as I can.
78. I don't trust newspapers!
79. I like debating
80. I live in a vagon
81. I clean my room once a month
82. I'm scared of american fast food
83. I have a third eye
84. I love Mozambique
85. I don't trust any religion.(I have my doubts...but I also trust some to an extent)
86. I used to play with barbies because all the other girls were doing it
87. I wanted to be a super hero when I was little.(still do...)
88. I like listening to wind chimes
89. I'm very disorganized
90. My hair is long and straight
91. I earn a lot
92. I don't like spicy food
93. I keep a diary
94. I can't do cartwheels
95. I am very lazy.!
96. I'm sarcastic
97. I think my hair is annoying
98. I'm very sensitive
99. I love being "ab-normal"
100. My left eye is violet and my right eye is a light blue.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Now...wasn't that just lovely? There's so many "sortas" and "kindas" on there...too bad you can't italicize if it's partly you...or maybe I need to do three of these, heheh...oh nevermind, maybe one person who reads this will get that...*shrug* too mant secrets...oh well...**off to eat some breakfast/lunch...whichever seems better** ]]> ~sappy-fire