deviantART: by:sergiofx

http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/13243198/ Wed, 06 Jun 2007 18:27:25 PDT

Links

My Dark Art
My Airbrushing
My Misc
My Designs
My Scarps

Thoughts

It's 3:19 am. I shouldn't be sleeping if that's what you're thinking. I should be doing my projects. Yet, here I am, sitting, not doing anything important... Just wondering...

I look at my room, couple of posters above the computer table where I am sitting now, a busted Pentium 4 that I should fix soon is right behind my laptop, 4 remotes next to me: TV, DVD, AC and an old one that I am tired to figure out what is it used for. You know, the usual room. Couple of clothes here and there, some projects, oh, and a fish that I have been neglecting for a while... Poor thing, haven't changed her water in about three weeks... "Swimming in my own shit" she must be thinking... Or is it a "he"?

It's calm in here... my own world. No one would get in unless I welcome them. My refugee from the world, my own sanctuary. I guess the consequences of my life put me in a lonely room for nearly all my life, and I got used to it. I can't tell if me having intimacy issues (ask those who are close), is a bad thing, or the fact that I feel free in my own space is the bad thing. I just know one thing. This is me.

I am watching a show that is supposed to show you how to make it in the big leagues... How to accomplish your dreams, and supposedly, be happy. I find myself being pulled into two different directions, both on the negative side. One would be the resentful emotion that took hold of me most of my life, that low self-esteem, the "I'm never gonna make it" side of me, while the other direction takes me into rage and anger at the structure I live in, the one that forces me to chase my dreams, that plays tricks with my mind and makes me believe that to live, I have to start living...

Which one is it? Should I or shouldn't I?

We fight correct? It's nature's law? 'The survival of the fittest'? (sorry baby doll, I know you hate this quote) We fight for our rights, we fight in the E.R to save a life, we fight to make our dreams come true, we fight for our love... Anyone wondered who is it we are fighting with? Who is the enemy?

Is sadness the enemy? Is it death? Why do I fight to survive? What's so appealing about surviving?

It's circular isn't it? Life, Survival, the Continuation... whatever you want to call it. We survive to keep surviving. It's one day at a time, until we die. Sure, it does seem like a pessimist talking, it does look like I am wearing a "I am a mis-understood teenager", but is it not. I do see the bright side of life, I do enjoy when there is a time to enjoy, I do know that waking up and knowing today you're gonna look in the eyes of the person you love is more than enough, but at the same time, it's like something must be taken, so that another must be given.

Life has to take something from me to make me enjoy what she is going to offer. I can't say that this isn't fair, because I never read once, not in any religious, scientific or paranormal book about anything that even resembles the life of: "Life is supposed to be fair!" That's what makes me wonder when people go around saying: "It's not fair!"... Exactly who said that it's supposed to be?

But where am I heading? Where will the road take me next? I know I have so much ahead of me, I look at my mother's life and see her ups and downs, where she was and where she is now... Life takes you places you never thought you'd go.

I myself, in my 21 years of living, was born in a civil-war that lasted 5 more years since the day I saw light, I witness the divorce of my parents after us changing three houses by the time I was 8, I cried silently in my bed when a girl broke my heart when I was 12, I hugged my best friend at my father's funeral, and felt that nothing means anything anymore, even though 5 days before, I was surprised to how little my father meant to me. I survived so far more than 20 car bombings, including 2 about 1 KM away from my house, and 2 near by university. I survived a devastating 1 month war last year....

I guess it's safe to say that I don't know what the word "peace" means. And I am not talking about the political one, I am talking about feeling safe, safe in your country, safe in your house and safe in yo... ]]> ~sergiofx 2 DDs, 200+ watchers & 20.000+ P.views http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12899996/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12899996/ Wed, 09 May 2007 13:16:15 PDT

Well, seems 2 is my lucky number these days

So yesterday I come to DeviantART as usual, only to be hit in the face with a whole lot of Favs and Friends watchers. I was shocked at first, then realized that one of my work must have been picked as a Daily Deviation. And right I was, it was this picture

Suggested by

& Featured by

So thank you guys

It made me really happy becaause this isn't my first Daily Deviation, so it kinda proves that the first one was picked by chance. Also, the fact that this picture has the style I am trying to get better at is also a plus and makes me want to create even more of this style.

Anyway, thanks to everyone who favorited this piece, those who checked my gallery (more than 36.000), those who watch me (exactly 226 now) and commented on them. Thank you all.

Oh and sweetie, I know you suggested a different one not one week ago, but its all good

I love you.

For commision work - Contact me at sergio_halaby@hotmail.com

]]> ~sergiofx I seem to look like a terrorist http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12878579/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12878579/ Mon, 07 May 2007 16:42:48 PDT

So here are two funny stories that happened to me and my girlfriend, two nights in a row.

The first one happened last night, we went to Mcdonalds and as I was driving into the parking, I realized that I needed to change my shirt, and luckily, I had a clean one in the car. So Mirna took it and we entered Mcdo. to head for the bathroom to change. However, it seems that we entered in a rushed and suspicious way, so what happened next was very funny. As we got near the bathroom, Mirna took my black shirt from her purse and gave it to me, and I went inside. About 4 mins later, two managers came into the bathroom i was in, while I had already changed and had my old shirt on the counter. The first manager stayed outside, while the second one looked in awe (I saw him in the mirror) at my shirt, and he just went into the cabin next to mine, without saying anything. 15 seconds later, he goes out and looked again in fear at my shirt, wanting to say something but didnt. It was abovious he didnt do anyting inside the bathroom, he was just checking what I have under the shirt. lol. Then, he went outside, and as I did, Mirna told me that while the manager was inside with me, the other one was asking her quesions like: "Can I help you?" and she said: "I am waiting for my bf to come out." So he said: "And the what?"

It was really funny, putting fear in the heart of people hehehee.

The second similar story happened today, while we were driving into the parking of CityMall (Geant). There are those security guys that check if you have a bomb inside your car or something (no one trusts anyone anymore). So me and Mirna and Dina were inside, and it seems that the thingie that checks for bomb was giving mixed and suspicious signals. Add to that, we had plenty of stuff in the back. So the guy asked us to pull over. And we did, and he started check the whole car. I looked into the device he was using, and at some point, it indicated that I have TNT in the car, and at other times, it indicated that its too late and we have run. I am serious. I actually read: "Overheat! Stay Away!" I was laughing so hard on the inside, but has to keep my innocent look. The thing went on for about 15 mins, and he just kept going over the car, inside, outside, the tires, under... And nothing seemed to make sense. Then, he told me I can go. So I was like: "wtf?" and he said: "it seemed that there is a bad rotten smell in the car, thats why the device is giving mixed signals."

Another day in the life of a terrorist right? It was fun as well

Anyway, what else?

I saw Spiderman 3 two times at the movies, but not because I wanted to, but it just happend. I didnt like it the 1st time, and it was worse the 2nd time. Not to say that the battle scenes werent amazing and almost never-before-scene, but the story itself was kinda bad. Three villains in one movie it too much, it felt like they just threw Sandman for no reason at all. Venom needed a loooot more time, and they wasted soo much time on scenes that were not necessary at all. Goblin Jr. was great, I love Harry. Of all three villains and one hero, Venom stole the movie, but he deserved the whole focus, not the last 30 mins, so that was a big let down.

The good thing is that I went into the movie not expecting much, because I saw the trailers and realized he movie is over-packed. I have to look forward to Shrek 3 and POTC 3 now, not to forget Transformers and Die Hard 4.0

]]> ~sergiofx Updates http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12632460/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12632460/ Tue, 17 Apr 2007 13:24:36 PDT

I know I have been rather away from DeviantART, but that's because they are worring us down with university work. It's kinda stupid, but what the heck...

Well, nothing really important have been happening in my life recently...

I watched 300 3 times already at the movies and I MIGHT watch it one more time, I don't know, it depends. Its an amazing movie, one of those slashers where you just want to sit down and watch blood pouring out, heads/legs being chopped off in Bullet-time, Heroes screaming their lungues out... Not a historical movie 100%, not a move that makes you think, you just go in there and have a great time watching some of the best Hand-to-hand battles ever witnessed.

I am obsessing about "Shadow of the Colossus" at the moment, its a rather old game (last year), but I just got the heart to finally dare myself and go after the damn 16 Colossi. If you aren't familiar with it, you are a lone traveler on a horse with a dead girl. You arrive to this magestic place where it seems there is way to bring back the souls from the dead. However, to do so, you must 16 Titans roaming the land. The game does nothing else. You ONLY have to kill them. No minions to kill, no guards on the way, nothing. All you have to do is find each Colossi and kill him. But here's the best part, finding the Colossi is 1/3 of the work, finding a way to get on him is the other 1/3, and killing him is the rest. Its just an amazing game, all you have on your back is a sword and a bow/arrow. You can imagine what an engine it has. It is definitly one of the most artistic games I've ever played.
Mirna came over to my place today to help me kill the 3rd one, we were right on top of his head smashing him in his weak spot, when...... yup, the electricity went out!! Don't you just love Lebanon?? It was damn 6pm! So because of this, am gonna find a way to hook the UPS to the PS2, so that it never happens again....

What else?

Well, I'm really missing creating new work, I have a lot in mind, especially now I have the basics in 3D max, I just want to start creating my backgrounds like buildings and such, and combine it with Photoshop to see where it gets me.

well thats it for now, gotta go back to my projects now.

Commission work ~ contact me at sergio_halaby@hotmail.com

]]> ~sergiofx Lebanese DevMeet = 24th March! http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12170835/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12170835/ Tue, 13 Mar 2007 16:00:17 PDT

Taken 100% from

this goes out to my lovely fellow lebanese deviants.

DEVMEET ON SATURDAY 24TH OF MARCH 2007

and myself have been wanting to do this for a while and im sure a great number of you guys agree to this!

now for details:

WHERE? in Jbeil, (Byblos) at the old souk.
WHEN? saturday 24th march (thats the sat after this one) at 3 o'clock.
WHO? lebdev? welcome!

All of this is mildly discussable. all those with cars please do tell so we can arrange transportation. worst case scenario we meet at a Connex station and take a bus there. it's Cheap and SAFE.

will be in Jbeil starting 1 o'clock, so early birds are welcome but i suggest for those of you who dont have work to sleep in

Any suggestions? comments? plz let me know!

Its high time we got off our asses and did this, ppl!
lets giv Bassem a break for once and organize it ourselves!

ill b honest, i miss you guys and i really want this to work, so ill b awaiting your opinions...

]]> ~sergiofx Two tags http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12068922/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/12068922/ Mon, 05 Mar 2007 14:35:37 PST

I have been tagged by `Cedarseed so here goes

Rules:
The player of this "game" starts with the topic "6 weird habits/things about yourself" and people who get tagged need to write a journal about their 6 weird habits/things as well as stating the rules clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "you are tagged" in their devpage comments and tell them to read yours.... "

1. When I see a movie at the cinema, I usually get obsessed with it (if I end up liking it), using wallpapers from the movie, downloading trailers, listening to the music... It goes on for about a month

2. Between 6 girlfriends in my life, only 2 were younger than me.

3. I have a thing for quoting movies, especially disney ones. I don't know if I get the sounds correct, but my girlfriend always laughs so thats what counts the most.

4. I would walk naked in the street but won't ever sing in public.

5. On message boards all over the internet, I am much more cocky than I am in real life. Its fun

6. I cant seem to think of a 6th one

And she didnt tag me with this, buuuut, oh well

Rules
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesnt make sense. NO CHEATING!
4. Tag 5 people.
5. With the answers, give your own comments on how it relates to the questions.

HOW ARE YOU FEELING TODAY?
AcDC/ Highway to Hell
hahahaha, perfect fit

Well its kinda true actually.

WILL YOU GET FAR IN LIFE?
Korn - Another Brick in the wall
Damn... I'm not gonna be something special am I?

HOW DO YOUR FRIENDS SEE YOU?
RedNex - Wild and Free
Weeeell... not really.. I'd like to be though

WILL YOU GET MARRIED?
Staind - Outside
Oh, guess this means I wont? I'll always be outside? Or is it I'll sleep outside the room, aka the couch? mmmmm

WHAT IS YOUR BEST FRIEND'S THEME SONG?
Placebo - The Bitter End
yea, works here too

WHAT IS THE STORY OF YOUR LIFE?
Placebo - Song to say goodbye
Oh man!!! I love this song, and more than often, I felt this song is for me... wow...

WHAT WAS HIGH SCHOOL LIKE?
The Cure - Burn (The crow soundtrack)
hahahaha, yea, I BUUURRNEED highschool

HOW CAN YOU GET AHEAD IN LIFE?
Rammstein - BENZINE
Oh yeaaaa!!

just put the fuel and lets DRIIVE!!!

WHAT IS THE BEST THING ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS?
The Rasmus - Shot
mmm, doesnt really work here, but I guess we are loyal to each other?

WHAT IS IN STORE FOR THIS WEEKEND?
Scorpions - Send me an angel
heyy, cool

an angel is coming this weekend....

TO DESCRIBE YOUR GRANDPARENTS?
Royksopp -Triumphant
well, its only music, but does have that oldies feel to it

HOW IS YOUR LIFE GOING?
GNR - Dont cry
holy shit.... no comments....

WHAT SONG WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Reamon - Supergirl
NOOOOO!!! I"M A SUPERMAN!!!

... ]]> ~sergiofx Everyday for six years! http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11987633/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11987633/ Tue, 27 Feb 2007 13:13:10 PST

[link]

Just go look at it... its breathtaking....

The eyes... never changing... always sad...

oh wow.

.

]]> ~sergiofx Heaven on earth... no really... http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11904343/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11904343/ Wed, 21 Feb 2007 05:35:09 PST

Two night ago I came back from what you can say a sureal dream.

I went last thursday to Dubai to spend the weekend with my sweetheart (=corpsebride00) and her family, and boy, it was just amazing... no... not amazing... it was... sdfjhsaisd... (sorry, i had to make a new word!)

So this is the first time I actually travel, you can imagine how excited I was and how great it felt. I loved the feeling of my "first time", because I enjoyed it to the maximum, and I know the wonder feeling of traveling will fade away the more I travel (which am planning to).

The adrelanine rushing as the engines' noise rises, looking at the city at a 45 degree angle... looking at the land from 23000 ft.... and above the clouds, as the sun is setting at around 6pm... I wouldnt know where the earth ended and heaven began... Its like all one mesh of colors, a painter's work.... God must be a painter...

So I made it to dubai, a bit of problem finding the hotel, and then, there she was

On the balcony, waiting for me... according to her, this is one of the few times she saw me smile the way I did. I can't tell you how my smile looked like, but the feeling was overwhealming... seeing her, waiting for me like that, after a whole week of missing her... It was more than I can take.

Spending so much time with her was a kind of a bad idea, because I got so attached to her and so used to her around me, that I am missing her more and more now. I know these are vacation weeks, and they are rather perfect as opposed to real life, but living with her showed me that its very easy having her around my life so much. Like, I am the independant type, from the time I was 8, i had my own room, and I am usually locked inside it, and inside my own world. When outside people come in, I dont feel comfortable, even among friends. If they stay too long, I start feeling like i am choking. I was afraid I would have this feeling after spending 5 days with mirna, but I was so wrong. The more I spent time with her, the more I wanted to. She's just amazing in every way. There is nothing better than waking up in the morning and see her sleeping on the bed next to mine, or feel her hand waking me up in the morning, or actually giving her a kiss even before opening my eyes... (ok, so it wasnt ONE kiss... but you get the idea..)

Dubai.... what can I say? I loved every inch of it. the people, the mood there, the malls, the streets, the signs... I loved it all... The fastest growing tourism attraction is a small description. EVERYwhere you look, you see a new compound coming. People building like crazy, malls, hotels, houses... everything you can imagine, and more. It was just amazing to see such new creations, its like city of the future. Forget other cities, I am telling you, Dubai is the real deal. There is a new sky scraper that I saw today in an email, it has 50+ stories, each one revolves independitly from the other. You can see the sunrise when you wake up, and it slowlsy continues turning until you see the sunset in the evening, without making you feel bad or anything.

All in all, it was without a doubt the best weekend of my life. Without mirna, I would have had fun, but not this much. Mirna being there made it at 90% better. Thank you sweetheart for who you are and for giving me the best time ever.

~sergiofx Three, Third, Trilogy, Trinity, Tripod?... http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11759158/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11759158/ Sat, 10 Feb 2007 11:10:34 PST

Any more words that refer to the number Three?

So, what is it with the number 3? Well, its here again... Feb 10!!

Feb 10 is the day that marks my anniversary on DeviantART. Yup, THREE years already!!!

I was looking back now to the journal I made one year ago, to say I have been staying here for TWO years. Wow... such a long time ago!!

So, i'm gonna keep it short.

I'm here to thank you again for the wonderful time that I spent here. Thank you for every comment, every joke, every critique. All the favs and watches, even the competition that I was a runner-up at. The support from you during the July war 06 and everything that followed.

My first and latest deviation

and

and all that is in between

My time on DeviantART equals my time in real life. I have spent just as much in both worlds, and I love them both. Ok ok... I love DeviantART a bit more...

So, that's all for now.

Thanks for Everything again

Sergio Halaby

oh and, the movie 300 will rock my life around!!! CANT WAIT!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!

sorry, had to.

]]> ~sergiofx The Future... (new plans added) http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11625913/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11625913/ Wed, 31 Jan 2007 05:25:37 PST

*EDIT*
new plans added at the bottom!

Well, you know as they say, "if you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans..."

I guess it's true to some extent, I mean, people make plans all the time yet they end up with totally different ones. Sometimes that's good no?

So here I am, telling you about my plans for the future...Why?

Well, because my past fews days have been really boring and my present can be sum up with three words: "Writing this journal!" So that makes my future the most intresting thing...

Ok let's see.

- Movies wise:

I am really looking forward to seeing these movies in the near or long future:

Blood Diamond
Ghost Rider]
300
Shrek the third
Spiderman 3
Pirates of the Caribbeans 3
Transfomers!!!

Live Free or Die Hard
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
The Simpsons Movie!!!!!

Rush Hour 3
Resident Evil: Extinction
National Treasure: The Book of Secrets

Artisticly wise:

I am thinking of starting a monthly journal or deviation, don't know yet, where it will only be a written thesis. This will hold some of my philosophical ideas that I usually tend to think about in my free time. Philosophy has been a major part of my life (Got an A+ on my philosophy course), and I think its time to share these ideas with you. They will range from the nature of reality, to Theology and how I see God, to simple explanations of various emotion feelings, such as desire, love... There will be plenty of stuff and each topic will come once a month. We'll see how that goes.

I still have a lot of ideas for new deviations, they keep bouncing in my head. I am just trying to concetrate on a certain style where I can really develop myself and shine the most. I love dark art, and I love sureal/fantasy art. So I want to try to find a way to combine the two... Will keep you posted on how that will work out.

Relationship wise:

I am planning to be with Mirna till forever. Hopefully it will work out, even though there are a lot of outside "interferences", I just hope we make it through them. Its easy actually, we just need to stay focused...

Family wise:

Well, the plan was my sister was to get married on July 7 (07 - 07 - 2007), but I think she will postpone it till September. I will be walking her down isle, in a full suit. lol, It will be weird, but it still a long way from now, so i'll worry later

Technology wise:

I am planning to get my hands on Windows Vista as soon as possible. Of course it might take time for it to get "legally" to my country, but I will get it. But now that I think about it, when Windows XP first came out, I almost threw my computer out the window. It sucked big time before Service Pack 2, nothing was compatible with it, even the OS itself had a lot of bug.. So what do you think? I shall wait a year before I get it. Perhaps when Photoshop CS3 is out of its Beta, I will get them both (since Photoshop is Vista compatible!)

I WISH I can get my hands on the Playsation 3. Its coming to Lebanon in March with its second release worldwide. Actually, getting my hands on it will litterarly be the closest i'll get to it lol. Even if I managed to raise 1200$ to get it (this is the price in Lebanon), I won't be paying so much money on Original Blu-Ray discs... and by the time they figure out how to crack them, I would be broke

So, i'll write another journal perhaps in 2009 saying I bought a Playstation 3.... can't wait!

Music wise:

There were plans to go to the Dubai Desert Rock Fest in March, but, things got complicated a bit and now its off. Oh well... hopefully something "better" will come in its place (person concerned knows what i'm talking about!)

***NEW PLANS!!!***

Traveling wise:

If everything works out perfectly and no one burns down the airport (DONT ASK), there might be plans for me and mirna to be in Dubai from Feb 17 to Feb 21. The plans so far is for Mirna to go to her home in Bahrain on Feb 10 or something, stay with her family for a week, then, all of them, leave to Dubai on the 17th, as will I from Lebanon,... ]]> ~sergiofx Burton Fans! http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11341251/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11341251/ Sat, 06 Jan 2007 18:57:06 PST

Me and my lovely girlfriend =corpsebride00 were talking the other day on how much we adore Tim Burton with passion, so we thought about starting a group here on DeviantART.

And so we have.

Today was the official opening of the club, and already, we have 9 members, which is great.

If you are a Tim Burton fans, head over to the club and join in. You can add your own work that is related to Tim Burton movies, or just watch what other members can come up with.

See you on the other side

~Burton-fans

]]> ~sergiofx 2006: Best Year of my Life http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11210075/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11210075/ Wed, 27 Dec 2006 10:42:19 PST

Phew, what can I say?

This is, without a doubt is the busiest, most amazing, most surprising year of my life. Combine all the years I lived before, they wouldn't match up to this one.

Lets see...

Of course, the most obvious and the most important one that happened is the ONE thing I was looking for last year, which is my finding love. I kinda blew that, It didn't work as planned. Cause I didn't exactly find love, I found something else. Something far bigger, far better and far more surreal than anything I ever thought of. I heard of love before, I read about it and saw it in movies, but no one told me it can be this big. And yes, it's even bigger.
March 15 2006 was the day my life changed forever, because it was on that day that me and another soul decided to take a chance on this thing people call love, and I'm so glad we did. This goes to the love of my life, my partner in crime and my best best friend, the one I can rely on, Mirna. (=corpsebride00) My love, thank you for giving me this year, and I cannot wait to spend a million other with you, in this world or the next.

Plenty and plenty of things happened with me. It was unbelievable. And though some of them were bad at the time, I realize how big and how important they were, because they helped me a lot, in ways I'll never figure out.

The Bad Parts:
Lets see, I got bit by a spider, I fractured my rib, I cut my two legs in two different places while playing sports, bleeding very badly, I survived a war that happened in my country, I heard the bombs falling and felt what its like to sit around waiting for death. I lost contact with one of the most important girls in my life. I had to watch the girl I love leave on a bus to another country, and didn't see her for 2 & 1/2 months, and I missed her more than I ever missed anyone. I received a letter that we have to evacuate our home, the house I lived in since I was 8, because they want to "redecorate" the street I live in, (which happened today afternoon by the way).

The Good Parts:
I fell in love... does it get any better? Also, my sister got engaged and they set a date for the wedding, which is 7 - 07 - 07 (how cool is that?), I met amazing new people, seriously, I am so glad they are in my life. I won't name names, cause I know I'll forget some, but I thank them all. I won at a contest here on DeviantART, I was the runner-up and I won a big ass poster and deviantDOLLARS and a 1 year sub. I got a lot better at university, finally got to the courses where I can show my real talent, instead of drawing a line here and another there and call it "Design". I'm getting good grades and people are noticing my work, so it's amazing. I realized I have fans I didn't know about, lol, my all time favorite line is: "Man, I saw this picture and loved it, but never knew you did it!!" Music to my ears! Also, I kinda got discovered, lol, thanks to ~ViviPhalloids and ~hAzArDoUs-ChEmIcAl (thanks guys), thought one of the works didn't work, it doesn't really matter to me. I got a new laptop and a new phone (which was a gift from the love of my life). I stopped having nightmares, but I still have insomnia..

First Time Things
I hope I can remember all the things I did for the first time.

OK, I'm a bit ashamed to say this, but I got my first kiss this year, I played a Final Fantasy game for the first time (FF X-2), I went Christmas shopping, I quit a job, i got a spider bite, I witnessed a war, I went to the Canadian Embassy, I went to the airport alone, I won a contest, I printed one of my works, I sat on the sea shore with a girl in my arms, I dated someone younger than me (

), I used two of my artworks for a project assignment.

01. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before?
Already stated above

2. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Nope. No one, but one got married

3.Did anyone close to you die?
No.

4.What countries did you visit?
Still in Lebanon. Didn't move an inch.

5.What would yo... ]]> ~sergiofx One Fact http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11139893/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11139893/ Thu, 21 Dec 2006 14:46:25 PST

I have a black heart

.

]]> ~sergiofx Missing Art Creation http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11019374/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/11019374/ Sun, 10 Dec 2006 15:59:29 PST

As you already know if you read my last journal, they are burying us with projects at the university. This is getting ridicilous.

The most I am upset about is the fact that I don't have time to work on a new artwork anymore. I have a lot of ideas in my head, so many things to create, from all styles. Photomanipulation, to Space Art, to Scenery... But I just don't have time, and I miss it.

I miss sitting down on my pc and just get lost in my ideas, possibly surprising myself a bit cause I didnt know I can do this or that... Then upload the finish work and waiting to see if anyone will comment on it... I miss it, and I know that the projects are just gonna keep getting worse and worse.

I barely have time for myself, and when I do, I usually try to go out with some friends or with mirna, so that I would see how life is happening, then I come back to my projects.

The days are the same to me, I even wake up sunday mornings to work on the projects.

Lets not forget, I absolutly hate these projects. I have no freedom whatsoever, except maybe in my web design course, which is really amazing and I am getting straigh As. Tomorrow I have my mid-term exam, I hope i keep this grade. Other courses are well, not so bad, but still, they are strangeling us.

I especially hate it when there is a jury. Not cause of the pressure or anything, but because each teacher has his own style and likings which they let affect their judgments of the works, and we end up sitting in class, watching the jury debating amond themselves whether its a good work or not. One is saying "Amazing", the other is saying "Horrible!" And really, I am not making this up. One teacher told us: "I want to congratulate you on the great work! amazing!" and after she left, the other stood up about 30 mins later and said: "This is horrible! I have no problem failing the whole class because I did it once and I'll do it again! I will not pass you if you keep this horrible job!"

So... what the fuck am I supposed to do? Who would I believe?

I don't know... just some random babling...

Anyway, I seem to find myself lately to be surfing around DeviantART and other Art websites to look at artworks, to feed my eye, cause I really need to see such things on a daily basis, or else I go nuts. I am truly addicted to art. I mean, there are pictures and artworks that litteraly make you stare at them and want to get lost in this amazing world...

Oh, I found two hours of free time on tuesday, and found some money in my pocket, so I took this a chance to go and do my hair in braids, something I kinda regret now. Not because I don't like them, on the contrary, everyone seems to like them a lot, but because I spent two hrs of my life in front of a mirror while a woman was tearing my living soul from my body, I litteraly felt like someone was holding me from my hair and dangling me over a cliff, I spent the night in pain and didn't sleep at all cause my hair is really thick, and, I spent 30$. So yea, I could have stayed and create something on my computer instead of wasting my time... oh well... never again I guess... might post some photos of my later when I find my cam.

Later

Sergio

]]> ~sergiofx Thoughts of the Month http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10899874/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10899874/ Thu, 30 Nov 2006 09:39:54 PST

This is a long ass journal, don't bother if you don't have the energy

CSS Journal
As you can tell, and if you don't then you seriously need help, I finally joined the "CSS" world of deviantART. I thought hey, since I am subscribed for a year, might as well make the best out of it.
I didn't like the fact that CSS codes were available at first, because well, it is turning DeviantART into Myspace. But hey, since I am going to be uploading my personal website portfolio soon, might as well forget that this website is an art website, since this is what the admins want. So here goes, took me around three hours to make, with all the mistakes and the uploads and stuff, but i am perfectly happy with the way it is. Please share what you think...

MY BIRTHDAY
Well, this month was my birthday, it was november 3rd. Now, on that specific date, i was sick of course. Why? I don't know, maybe its because i am 21 now... so, I was sick and didn't go to university, and during the day, jorj (~jorj0) tells me that he is coming over to see how I was. So the door knocked and my mom opens the door, and here comes in jorj with mirna (~corpsebride00), and she is holding a small cake with a candle on it, the candles with the sparks, the ones you try and try but fail to blow out. It was a really nice surprise that I didn't see coming. Mirna went more crazy it seems, cause she had bought me a cellphone (Sony Ericson), and an Album for Michael Jackson (Thriller), which has a really nice design and some new features. Jorj got me a "Sexy Girl" key chain which am not ashamed to say I DIDNT use!

The next two days, I was feeling better, so i had the energy to take my new found money (from my aunts) and buy that laptop i really needed. Indeed i did, I bought (and using it now) a Toshiba Tecra A8, 1GB RAM, 1.83 GHz, 90GB HD, 15:4HDD screen, fingerprint ID and an upgradable board. It cost me around 1800$, but I am paying 60$/month for 3 years, so it will become 2100$ or so with intrest. I am loving it actually

Very nice machine.

My sister had the funniest gift, she bought be a Superman comic book which had the comic of the recent movie "Superman Returns" and some other tales. I am not really a fan of Superman, and no one seems to notice when Superman returned, so did Clarck Kent, but whatever I guess. The reason she bought me that is because I have a thing for the Superman Logo.

SUPERMAN LOGO EXPLANATION
And the reason I like it is because if you look at it >

its an S inside a diamond shape. Now, my name is Sergio (starts with an S) and Mirna's last name is Almaz, which means in English: "Diamond"

So there you go

an S inside a Diamond and you get

btw we found out this by mistake! so it's cool.

UNIVERSITY
Well, it seems that they decided to rape us in university. And if you undestood: "we will give you so many projects you will see the sun rise three nights a week, no time to go out with ur friends, no time for urself, u barely have time to eat and you will think that spending time on the road from university to ur home is a waste of time" than you are correct, cause this is what i meant! This semester is a living hell! SOOO many projects to do, its unbelievable. for two weeks straight, I would sleep 10 hrs all together. I would wake up at 8 on sundays to work, I barely spent time with my girlfriend, I didn't see my friends. It was incredible.

WORK
Well, either I made a deal with the lord of darkness to send me people with jobs for me in exchange of my soul, or something happened, cause all of a sudden, work is raining on me. From small logos and websites creation for people at university, to an album cover for a local band. But hey, i am not complaining

So the latest and most important project now is classified, but I can only tell you that its for a local band called: "Kaoteon" and I am designing their artwork co... ]]> ~sergiofx Another stolen Quizz http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10856541/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10856541/ Sun, 26 Nov 2006 12:41:12 PST
Stole it from

HONESTY SECTION-

01. Honestly, what color is your bra (or undershorts if you're a boy)?
black...

02. Honestly, whats on your mind?
Get ur ass off DA and go do ur projects

03. Honestly, what are you doing right now?
Starving...

04. Honestly, do you think you are attractive?
not really... but I have a certain charisma

05. Honestly, have you done something bad today?
well, it was at 2am last night, so yea... (a 360 turn with my car, on purpose, nearly died with three guys in the car, it was fun!!!)

06. Honestly, do you watch Disney channel?
yup, and Cartoon Network

07. Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now?
no, not really...

08. Honestly, what makes you happy most of the time?
knowing people are thinking of me while am not there

09. Honestly, do you bite your nails?
never have, never will

10. Honestly, do you want to see someone this very minute?
yup... badly

11. Honestly, when is the last time you went to Taco Bell?
Taco Bell?

12. Honestly, are you in denial?
I AM NOT IN DENIAL! NO! NO! NO!

13. Honestly, where would you rather be right now?
Italy, in a cafe trotoire, with my gf, and my harley is parked next to us.... akh ya albeh

14. Honestly, do you like someone?
yes i do....

-ANGER SECTION

01. What do you do when you're mad?
Break stuff, it ranges from glass, to wood to bone.

02. Ever made anyone cry when you were mad?
yes i did... am sorry

03. Do you swear when you're mad?
hohoooooo

-CRYING SECTION-

01. When was the last time you REALLY cried your heart out?
two years ago, when my dad passed away (the last I cried till today)

02. When was the last time you cried yourself to sleep?
three years ago i think, not sure, but it was during that time

03. Do you still cry when you get an injury?
nope...

04. What usually makes you cry?
death it seems (only happened once), and before, when i was heartbroken.

-HAPPY SECTION-

01. Are you usually a happy person?
lately I have been, and by lately i mean 8 months... Gee, i wonder what happened...

02. What can make you happy?
Mirna mostly, and surprises...

03. Does being with your friends make you happy?
everytime, I LOVE hanging out with them

-SELF-ESTEEM SECTION-

01. Do you believe in yourself?
yes and it is a VERY recent thing..

02. When people say they think you are good looking/pretty, do you agree?
I think they're on crack

03. Are you one of those people that thinks they are ugly?
I dont really think about it to be honest...

-DA SECTION-

01. Why did you join dA?
To get better at art and share it.

02. Are you addicted to deviantART?
its more than an addiction... am having an affair with deviantART.. (sorry baby

)

03. What type of people were you hoping to meet?
artists... I ended up meeting crazy people, which turned out to be better!

04. Are you looking for love on dA?
hell no!

05. What do you think of the person that tagged you with this evil survey?
technically she didnt tag me, I stole it, but still, she's a pretty cool/funny/cute/deep/creative/weird/excentric/hillarious/small chick, so she's great

]]> ~sergiofx Finally, a good night sleep. http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10675399/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10675399/ Fri, 10 Nov 2006 02:29:38 PST
Well, this past week it was a living hell. I had SO muc projects to do, it was unbelievable.

I am not saying I dont like it, I like pressure and I work great under it. I also like what I'm doing, ok strike that, I am in love with what I am doing, so that's why I think i can still have the energy to sleep less than 8 hrs combined in 72 hrs.

From website designing, to page layout, to creating a stupid poster for a stupid marathon, it all came down this week. Tuesday night, I actually slept at 6 and woke up at 8.

But its all worth it when you go to class, present your project, and ALL the student (one at a time), tells you that your work is so great, you should hang it on a wall or sell it. That alone yesterday made me feel amazing, it was the Fallen Angel that I last did, which was used as a mag. cover for the project. Let alone the fact that someone told me recently that basically almost everyone (students) in the graphic department know about my work, even though either am not friends with them, or I dont even know them, and some really hate me for it. lol... It's stuff like these that make me really go on and want to create even more, the fact that people know about my work without me actually promoting them... It's just a deviantart page, (and not a good page).

So anyway, last night was project-free, so i took the time to go out with Mirna whom I have spent nearly 3 hrs with this entire week. We went out and celebrated ~jorj0's birthday, (happy birthday again man), and thats about it, went back at around 2 am to get a much needed sleep, and today i woke up at 10:30. Its weird, I didnt know the world looked like this for a long long time

Well, for people who arent in my country, things arent very stable here, its like we are sitting on a gunpowder barrel at all times. Something big is coming, from the inside this time. I won't talk politics, just wanted to point out on the sad and frustrated mood that has overcome the Lebanese people. It's like, you walk down the street and you cant even find a single person laughing, not even smiling. Its like there this is shadow all over Lebanon... Very very bad.

Oh right, I forgot to tell you

my birthday was last week, last friday exactly, on the 3rd. So here i am sitting in bed in my pjs, my second day of being sick, and here comes mirna and jorj coming into my room without any warning, carrying a small cake with one of those candle you can try to blow out, but you can't. lol, i was really surprised. So mirna bought my a cellphone. Let me type that again. Mirna got me a cellphone. I swear this girl is crazy. She got me a Sony Ericson/mp3 player with a 2.0 megapx camera. It's amazing! She said she was lost between an iPod and a cellphone... Don't you agree? Isnt' she crazy? but I still love her nonethelss.. lol... (I adore you baby girl).

Well, that's about it for now. Sorry for talking too much, but its been a bit long and I wanted to update you on everything

]]> ~sergiofx 11 secrets http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10558415/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10558415/ Mon, 30 Oct 2006 11:05:03 PST RockstarVanity's journal.

The rules:
List 11 things you want to say to 11 different people.
Don't say who they pertain to.
Feel free to comment, but don't confirm or answer anything.
Never discuss it again.

[01]
You're my reason to be, you're the only reason to be. I can't seem to understand how I was breathing before, I don't know how I will breath after...

[02]
Do I still exist in your world? Should I be mad at you, or fall into missing you?

[03]
I'm the only one who understands when people judge you by your looks. but then again, lets face it, I wish i can stop looking... and I'm the only one to tell you: "you're not pretty, you're beautiful!"

[04]
I'll try to become the artist you never bothered to be. I'll try to take a different path...

[05]
Get the fuck out of my life... please.

[06]
Thank you for everything you've done, even though I don't say it, I do feel it. You put your life aside for me, and I don't know how I should repay you. I don't think my words will ever be enough, but don't worry... I will show you one day...

[07]
I want you to be my futur best-man, if that ever happens... but Shhh, don't tell the others, they'll hate me.

[08]
Why do you look at me so? Your eyes tell me way more than you want me to hear.

[09]
You just fell in a world I cannot follow, and I have not seen you ever since... It's such a shame... you could have been so much better... I will never understand why you didn't open up to me enough so that I'd understand why you do what you do... forgive me, I could not follow.

[10]
Where are you? Do you exist in the other world? Were you old enough to start existing? I don't know you, you know me.. I have this feeling that you were my brother.. I would have loved to meet you.

[11]
I'm glad I didn't get involved with you... you showed me that clearly the other day, even though we laughed about it.

]]> ~sergiofx a not so lucky week... http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10435509/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10435509/ Wed, 18 Oct 2006 15:07:40 PDT
I didn't have a good week, lets say, on the luck-wise... I don't know exactly what is going on, but it seems that someone put a spell on me or something. so if you are reading this, mr. who put the jinx on me, am gonna kick your ass very soon!!!

It started with both my screens dying on me, when i had a university project, on the same night. Imagine, what are the odds that your TWO screens go dead... so now one is in the hospital getting fixed, the other is way too old for me to give a shit...

My week didn't get better, from getting hit from behind while driving, nothing big, to get a flat tire while going to the university on a different day, to waking up late instead of organizing my time cause the alarm clock didnt go off, and my mom forgot her own son was still sleeping, to getting a rather small knee injury tonight in the try-outs for the university soccer team, which am having second thoughts about it now, not because i suck, but because i know myself, if i am not addicted to the thing, i won't put my heart into it, and i will get bored rather fast. I'll have to see...

So what else?

The storm that took Lebanon by surprise was rather nice, it was extremely violent and am sure all my lebanese watchers agree with me. The good part was that me and my girlfriend were sitting near the sea and we were watching the storm getting closer from afar. It was the first time i actually see something like this, and i knew saturday night was going to be stormy, cause what we saw in the distance was rather amazing and strong. It was just beautiful watching a thunder storm without worrying about getting wet, but then of course, we did, but it doesn't matter

it seems am talking a lot fast and randomly, but i dont really care, cause i have been out of internet since the storm, and i have been living with the real world for nearly 4 days, which is FAR too long for me... now i feel like i am home

There are a lot of personal art projects in my mind, and am kinda thinking of doing something daring which i will keep to myself now, but i just need to fix the damn screen, get everything back in order, finish my late projects for uni courses, and the am back on track.

well, that's about it for now.. I guess i'll see you soon, hopefully from my normal screen...

oh and, of course, i wanna thank my supergirl for allowing me to use her laptop to finish some projects during this weekend.. I love you sweetie...

Alla 7akim btw!!!!

]]> ~sergiofx The bad, the good and the GREAT news! http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10216204/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/10216204/ Thu, 28 Sep 2006 14:52:14 PDT It's been a long time since I write anything here, I guess I didnt have much to say, but recently, things have moved rather fast, which is always good for me.

To start with some bad news, last tuesday (last week), I fractured my rib..
I was playing Basket with some friends, and this really huge guy who was playing with us for the first time hit me accidentally with his elbow, and here i am now.
It's not that big, I didnt think of it much at first, but by saturday, the pain was getting worse, so i went and got an X-ray and it was fractured, so now am living on painkillers. The bad part is that this has to heal on itself, and it will a longer time than any other bone in the body, because it moves everytime, well.. i breath. But there is nothing else to do..

A good news is that I am a runner-up in the Renaissance Comic Strip contest, which is really great news for me

I got the news about a week ago or less, but tonight I got my prize, which is the 1 year sub, also i will get a move poster from Miramax and 20 deviantDollars... I only care for the 1 year sub... I'm really proud that I did win the runner-up, first time I actually win a contest here on DeviantART.

GREAT news, mirna ~corpsebride00 FINALLY came back on Sunday, I went and picked her up from airport and we spent the rest of the week, till today, everyday together... I've seen her this week more than I have seen my mother who is sleeping in the next room, and everytime I send her home, I feel i miss her... I don't know if that's love or obsession, but it's working either way

One last thing, ever since Dina ~petitemistress suggested a halloween party for Lebanese Deviants, I've really liked the idea, and already had a costume in mind, lol... so am thinking seriously about it and I am going to talk with Bassem `blackzer0 and see if we can organize something big and fun. So, what do my fellow lebanese think? Was Dina thinking good when she came up with the idea? let us know if you would actually come... DISGUISED!!!!

]]> ~sergiofx Kool Kwiz http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9887087/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9887087/ Mon, 28 Aug 2006 16:40:44 PDT JemimaAslana

Whats your name spelt backwards?
oigres ybalah

What did you do last night?
went out with the guys, played 15 rounds of pool, duncin donuts then came back to chat with my sweetheart

The last thing you downloaded onto your computer?
Google Eart Pro (don't worry, for free on limewire)

Have you ever licked a 9 volt battery?
Yup.. tasted like a 12v one

Last time you swam in a pool?
Last year

What are you wearing?
Topless with shorts.. going to bed

How many cars have you owned?
None

Type of music you dislike most?
Arabic music...

Do you have cable?
Yes

What kind of computer do you use?
Penitum 4, 512 Ram (I know), 2.6 Ghz... LCD screen 15"

Ever made a prank phone call?
Yea, it was hillarious

You like anyone right now? In love...

Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?
Not in a million years...

Furthest place you ever traveled?
yea, never left my home country... I hate that

Do you know all the words to the national anthem?
What's a national anthem?

Shower, morning or night?
usually nights.. but from time to time, I shower in the morning...

Best movie you've seen in the past month?
A lot actually... The Skeleton Key, The Machinist... and i forgot, but there are plenty...

Favorite pizza toppings?
Pepperonni

Chips or popcorn?
Popcorn

What cell phone provider do you have?
Alfa

Have you ever smoked peanut shells?
Nah....

Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?
Oh yea sure... cause you know, am hotter than hot.

Orange Juice or apple?
Pineaple.

Who were the last people you sat at lunch with?
My mom and sister, yesterday

Your favorite chocolate bar?
KitKat

Who is your longest friendship been with and for how long?
Charbel. I've known him since we were both 6, we are still friends, after 15 years...

Last time you ate a homegrown tomato?
I hate tomatoes

Have you ever won a trophy?
Yup... in soccer a long time ago.. it was real fun..

Favorite arcade game?
None

Ever ordered from an infomercial?
Nope

Sprite or 7-UP?
I bleed 7-up.. no really, am drinking now as i am writing this...

Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school/work?
Yea sure, i went to a private school, so i wore a uniform all the time..

Last thing you bought at Walgreens?
huh?

Ever thrown up in public?
Came close to once...

Would you prefer being a millionaire or finding true love?
already found my true love, next on my todo list is becoming a millionaire..

Do you believe in love at first sight?
No.. its called passion at first sight.. love needs time

SpongeBob OR Jimmy Neutron?
BILLY!!!!!

Did you have long hair as a young kid?
I do now.. does that count?

What message is on your voicemail machine?
Dont have any

Where would you like to go right now?
Italy

Whats the name of your pet?
no pets...

What kind of back pack do you have, and what's in it?
Who cares?

What do you think about most?
Coming up with ideas for new dark works... they are having a fight in my head, need time to get them in order..

Now its your turn.. write here on in your journal this Kwiz...

]]> ~sergiofx My "artistic" life http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9859922/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9859922/ Sat, 26 Aug 2006 09:04:42 PDT
well, its been a while that I have been silent, even though I haven't been busy in my real life, with the war, my sweetheart not here and well, sick of going out with my friends and doing the same stuff all the time..

The reason is because I have been having a bit of an artistic block, of which the reason hit me today.

When I first started working in dark arts, or art in general, I would go around deviantART, looking for stocks. I would like an image, perhaps the pose, or get inspired from what others did with that same image, and I would get it and start working on it, see what theme works best for the stock.

Later, and till now, I got enough of the stock pictures that were offered here, and I started picturing images in my head before I saw the pose... Its like, first, the pose in the stock inspired me, now, I think of a pose in my head, and go on an internet quest to try to find it. This became a problem the more my images became complexe, and I realized at most that most of my pictures aren't coming out like I wanted them, because of lack of stock images. It really annoyed me.

Now, I dont even have the energy to go looking for a stock, it was taking a lot of time and most of the time, I would come out with nothing. Even some people (my sweetheart), suggested a few theme ideas, but I was unable to do them because I would never find a good pose. Even if I was going to use that pose for referance, not just as a stock...

So today, I got off my lazy ass and went to my CD provider, and bought Poser 6. I don't have any experience with this program, but I have seen an artist here that combines Poser and Photoshop, and from what I saw, he only uses poser as a model, then works everything in photoshop, from colors, to shapes to background. I liked the idea, and thought I should do the same.

now of course, I was trying hard to buy ONLY Poser 6, but I couldn't help not buying Final Fantasy VII for my Ps2 as well... hehehe..

So, am gonna go into poser and try to learn a much as I can, because I am sick of the lack of stocks, since they are mostly in my head...

Maybe I will be more active once I get used to the program, and learn how to pro-create along side photoshop. I think its the best way to go...

Well, that's it for now.. keep creating people

]]> ~sergiofx Happy Birthday Corpsebride00 http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9555397/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9555397/ Mon, 31 Jul 2006 14:35:47 PDT

Can please everyone go to my sweetheart's page ~corpsebride00 and wish her a happy birthday?

Please!!!

Its her birthday today, August 1, and I thought she's be happy if everyone just wished her a happy one...

So again, happy birthday my love. I wish I was with you right now to celebrate it

But Its ok, we always have next year!!!!

I love you!!

]]> ~sergiofx The Price of Freedom? http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9384308/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9384308/ Mon, 17 Jul 2006 11:14:47 PDT
For those of you who don't know (doubt there are many), Lebanon has been under the Israeli siege for the fourth consecutive day.

Wednesday morning, Lebanese party "Hezbollah" took two Israeli soldiers as captives from the borders. Couple of hours later, Israeli troops invaded Lebanon from the south, by land, air AND sea.

After the fourth day, Lebanon is now an island. They bombed EVERY bridge there is that connects Lebanon to the South, they bombed the two roads that ties Lebanon to Syria, They bombed our ONLY international airport, and about 5 sea ports.

As I said, Lebanon is now an Island, reaching out for help from anyone and everyone. But who's answering right?

My take in this journal is NOT to get some sympathy from anyone, because, well, that means nothing to me. I just want to make it clear, that Lebanon is NOT paying the price of freedom, because in 2000, Israel did leave the South of Lebanon once and for all.

On an ordinary day, the leader of Hezbollah decided (probably after having a bad dream) he should destroy every chance of living in a normal Lebanon, and crossed the borders and took two Israeli captives... Why? They want to exchange them with Palestinian captives that are held IN Israel.

Does something sound wrong to you?

For the end time in History, (1982 & 2006), Israel invades Lebanon as a retaliation for attacks FROM Lebanon to Israel. Am I siding with the enemy here? I seriously doubt that... What I am doing is laying the facts.

And the facts are that Israel NEVER attacks Lebanon for no reason at all, and NEVER invades Lebanon just for the fun of it, something they did TO EVERY OTHER ARAB NATION! If Hezbollah didn't want to stick his head up Israel's ass, we wouldn't be in this mess, and that's why I do not blame Israel for what they are doing.

Yes, they are taking it overboard, yes, they are destroying my country, but its MY fault as a Lebanese, and I am paying the price of what Hezbollah did. Where is the justice in that?

From the moment I became politically intrested in Lebanon, at the age of 11-12, I knew that there is something terribly wrong with this country, and that something is called: "Hezbollah".

Why take Israeli soldiers, hide them in LEBANON, to free some Palestinian captives? As a Lebanese first, and Arab second, why the fuck should I care about Palestine? Yes, I am Arab and saying this loud and clear: "FUCK PALESTINE!"

I am thinking about the Palestinians who took over my country in 1975, which literally ruined and fucked my country by starting a civil war, and I remember Israel coming into Lebanon in 1982 to "wash them away". What did Palestine ever do to me as a Lebanese that makes me give a fuck?

And for Hezbollah and everyone who is WITH Hezbollah, I seriously hope this is end for them. Because, you morons, until you can go out on your "quest" to have the "Oumma", close the fucking borders and fix Lebanon!!! Its Lebanon that is being screwed from every other direction, and instead of easing things, Hezbollah decides to be Israel's left hand and help with the destruction of Lebanon. And trust me, where we are now is FAR from over. Things are only to get worse... and for what? Palestine? Give me a break.

Last but not least, I wouldn't worry much if I were you. Being Lebanese by definition means being a survivor. That's why the rest hate us, because they can't bring us down, no matter how much they try to. We will step over (and spit on) this obstacle, and we will come out on top. We have done it before and we will do it again. Thats what Lebanon is, and that's why I love my country. Just look at the people, you don't see fear in their eyes. That's because we know how to handle this, and we will ALWAYS be around, something I don't wish for certain parties...

One last thing, please (Lebanese people WITH Hezbollah), don't try to come here and tell me I am wrong and try to convince me, because, frankly, I don't give a shit what you think

]]> ~sergiofx Spider Suspect http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9304291/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9304291/ Fri, 07 Jul 2006 17:01:29 PDT
My Dark Art | My Airbrushing | My Misc | My Designs | My Scarps

~jorj0 did this, after I told him what happened with me and the white spider.. lol, this was so funny, I just had to put it on my journal, and ask you all if you could just go to his page and show him some love..

hehe, thanks jorj

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Fuck Parental Advisory

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Clubs that actually took me in

http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9259325/ Mon, 03 Jul 2006 10:05:11 PDT
My Dark Art | My Airbrushing | My Misc | My Designs | My Scarps

So... who here got bit by a spider before?

*Sergio stands up....

Yup, I got bit by a spider, and it's a really amazing feeling, not the pain, the lump or the medicine I have to take, but the fact that something that I feared for so long happened to me, but it wasnt nearly as scary as I thought it would be.

Saturday night we went to "Rock Nation", a small rock festival in my country. Yea, i didnt it like it, but whatever..

Nearly around the end, I was sitting on the grass with ~corpsebride00 when I felt something with long thin legs walking on my back, under my shirt. I knew immediatly it was an insect. But didnt know what it was. I started searching my clothes, and it disapeared for about 15 seconds, only to see it later on my leg, so I squished it with my hand and threw it away.

It was all ok, until I went to sleep and wake up early yesterday, only to see this huge red lump on the right side of my hips, with what seems to be a purple bite right in the center. I didnt think it was important, perhaps just a moskito bite. But at the end of the day, I started to get a fever, and was really really tired, out of the ordinary, and I actually went to sleep from 11:30pm (first time this early in ages) and walk up today at 10am!!! almost 11 hours of sleep!!! I got up and looked at my hip, only to see that the lump got WIDER, BIGGER, more RED, and it reached the inner side of my right leg, and almost hit my crotch (not hitting at "important" items thank god!!)

So i knew it was somthing serious and went to the Dr. and he agreed that it was a spider's bite indeed, and it was rather serious... He gave me a few medications to take so that the inflammation wont get worse...

Now, am in a fever, really hurting and aching, but still, feeling really amazing!!

I mean, I just got bit by a spider for christ sake, something most people would faint at the even thought of it (how are you doing =hereditarynarcissism

), and I am just here talking about it

Its really great....

Of course not that great when I think that it could have been a seriously poisioness spider and would have killed me, but still, I am here and feeling great

Spiders, am gonna kick your ass from now on!!! What doesnt kill you only makes you stronger

(ok, so its a small spider bite, but humor me here!!!)

http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9168283/ Sat, 24 Jun 2006 11:02:45 PDT
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Unbelievable!!! She has done it again!!!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!

This girl is just amazing!! Seriously!! She has bought me ANOTHER subscription, for one month!!! wow... and i have been so inactive lately for university work and all that...

Sara (=hereditarynarcissism) I dont know how to thank you my friend...

You've been my biggest suppoter ever since we met in the forums... you're just... no words...

Please people, just go over there and thank her, show her (and her new cute tattoo) some love... Give her a hug, a kiss, whatever comes to your mind... She deserves it and more

Thank you again...

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Fuck Parental Advisory

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Clubs that actually took me in
... ]]> ~sergiofx An 'Apocalytpica'n Xperience http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9026759/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9026759/ Sat, 10 Jun 2006 10:16:15 PDT

" lalalaaaalalaa.....and nothing else matterrrrrrrs...."

oops, sorry... I am still under the influence (NOT THAT!!) of last night....

so, lets play a little game here... Its a riddle...

What has NO elec. guitare, NO bass player, NO keyboard, NO vocalist, ONE Drummer and FOUR cellos, and can rock the living shit out of you?

yup, one name: "Apocalytpica".

Last night, they made their appearance for the first time in the middle east, right here in Lebanon, not 15 minutes from where i live. I went with my girlfriend (~corpsebride00) and two of our friends, and right at the door, I saw most of my friends from university, and saw Omar (~conundrum66) who still hadn't bought the tickets. We got inside, and two local bands were the opening acts, they started at ~8:30pm. They were "Weeping Willow" & "The Arcane". To be honest, I didnt really enjoy the growling of "Weeping Willow", because, well, I never do. I enjoy music and lyrics, and not some beast on the stage. And trust me, most of the people that were just headbanging themsleves had no clue what Weeping Willow were saying. I freaking hate that. The Arcane were a lot better, they are a gothic band with 3 vocalists, and I really did enjoy their music.

Anyway, we were sitting in the back, just saving our energy for Apocalyptica. And at 10pm, it was announced they are next, so I approached the stage with a friend of mine, (mirna decided to stay in the back with her friend, which turnd out to be a good thing) so we made our way through the crowds, and eventually, got into the bars seperating the crowds from the stage.

What can I say?

The genius about this band is not just the music they play, but because they took the risk to choose another road, and they succeeded, am sure far beyond their beliefs. Four members play the Cellos, and one sick drummer. Who would have thought? And trust, you HAVE to be there to believe that such instruments can play such music. Any band can have an electrical guitar, a bass, a keyboard and yes, they can rock you. But you would be standing there in amazment, thinking: "Are you fucking kidding me? How the hell are you doing THIS with THAT?"

I loved everything about their show. Its rather fitting our small lebanese gothic society, it was not bad. I loved small moments here and there, it was good. For example, it was rather amazing when Eicca Toppinen (blondie) jumped in front of the drummer (who was in the middle), gave us his back, and actually started beating the drums with his bow. I also loved the poor guy who caught the drum stick that was thrown to him, he was standing next to me, but from the moment he caught it, everyone next to him jumped on him to steal it, and he was holding on to it like he was holding on to his own life. It was amazing how stubborn he was, he kept kicking and kicking and protecting the stick.. it was hillarious... Oh right, not to mention that later on, Omar was standing right in front of me! lol, i thought it was funny... he would disapear from time to time, than, suddenly appears... At some point, i didnt know who was in front of me, all i know is that i had my hand on someone's back and i was jumping up and down... lol, it turned out to be him.. (sorry man..lol)

Their show was about 1h and a half, and with the two opening acts, the whole thing was about 3 hrs & 1/2. not bad for 20$.... but you always want more, which is what the crowds were screaming after it was over. So the band came out and played another song.... so the crowd chanted more, and they came out and played another... hehe, this happened about 3 times, finally, the crowd felt it was too much, lol, so they stopped chanting, plus, i dont think they would have listened to us one more time...

Well, that was my night, last night...

Next stop?

July 1: Macbeth
July 8: Lake of Tears

Rockin' summer... and its only the beggining!!! ]]> ~sergiofx 6 weird habits/things about yourself http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9000695/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/9000695/ Wed, 07 Jun 2006 15:46:02 PDT corpsebride00

Rules:The first player of this 'game' starts with the topic "6 weird habits/things about yourself" and people who get tagged need to write a journal about their 6 weird habits/things as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next 6 people to be tagged and list their names.Don't forget to leave a comment on their devpage commments and tell them to read yours.....

so get thinking

1. I sneeze so much its not even funny anymore. I do it only at home though, i can control myself in public. I once reached 26 sneeze in a row, and most of the time when i pass 12, i start sneezing blood

2. Everytime I look at the clock, its either 11:11, or 12:12, or 5:05 or like that. They are always the same numbers, and it freaks me out...

3. I am addicted to KitKat

its crazy, if you cut me, i'll bleed KitKat... trust me..

4. Though I like everything dark, gothic, macabre and whatnots, i find myself laughing hysterically at silly cartoon shows, such as "The Grim Adv. of Billy & Many" & even "Tom & Jerry"

5. I go from not hungry to starving in less than a minute.

6. I would be fliping channels, and reach a scene of a movie, but not watch it. a week later, I would be fliiping channels, i would reach the same channel, with a rerun of the same movie, and it would be EXACTLY the same scene i saw the other time.

7. I dont follow the rules.... (ok, taken from ranya, so shut up) ]]> ~sergiofx Lucky Number Seven http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8787481/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8787481/ Tue, 16 May 2006 10:55:59 PDT nasma didnt want to tag anyone, so i guess i just stole this

Seven things that scare you:
1. Waking up and seeing someone standing next to my bed
2. HEIGHTS!! (but we are working on it

)
3. Dying alone
4. The light

5. Things with more than 4 legs
6. Weird food
7. Silence

Seven things you like the most:
1. Mirna
2. choclate
3. Black clothing
4. Art (mostly dark art)
5. My new cellphone

6. Mirna
7. Mirna

Seven important things in ur life:
1. Love
2. Mirna
3. My artworks (you know what i mean)
4. My friends
5. My family
6. Mirna
7. Mirna

Seven random facts about you:
1. I am one twisted son of a bitch
2. I am starving right now
3. I have insomnia
4. I think the best way to die is getting shot
5. I am really intrested in Philosophy, but hate most philosophers
6. I did NOT like The Davinci Code
7. I have an extremely bad memory!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seven things you plan to do before you die:
1. Travel the world
2. Roadtrip on a Motorbike (Harley Davidson)
3. Have my own Exhibition
4. Get a BIT fatter. just a bit... till i hit 75Kg
5. Shock the world
6. Survive somethng really dangerous
7. Make her happy!

Seven things that attract you to the opposite sex:
1. Hair
2. Sense of Humour
3. View on life
4. Humble
5. Her likes/dislikes
6. NOT being a drama queen (they should all die)
7. Her experiences in life

Seven things you say the most:
1. Enno
2. 3anjad?
3. l3amaaa
4. w 'er
5. ahhhhh
6. hehehe
7. wlek

Seven celeb crushes (whether local or foreign):
1. Haifa

2. Haifa

3. Haifa

4. Haifa

5. Haifa

6. Haifa

7. Haifa

Seven things you u totaly detest:
1. People who think they know-it-all
2. Drama queens
3. Lebanese people
4. Eating
5. Chemistry
6. The way I cant find the thing am looking for, even tho it was in my face for the past 8 months
7. Waking up early!!!! ]]> ~sergiofx Random Thoughts IV http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8429521/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8429521/ Mon, 10 Apr 2006 16:03:46 PDT
My Dark Art | My Airbrushing | My Misc | My Designs | My Scarps

Today's random thoughts

- What a lazy unproductive day.. I fuckn hate it when this happens!

- I can't believe you're mine.

- I dont know why, but recently, Nickelback, 3 Doors Down and Bon Jovi are starting to appeal to me... I wonder....

- Shadow of Colossus is one the best games i've played on Playstaion 2. Buy it NOW!

- Ice Age 2: The Metldown, this thursday. Cant wait!!!

- I still can't believe you're mine.

- If only i can get the time (and engery) to finish these personal projects i have in mind. "Bound" , "Wicked Witch of the West", "Lady Crow" & "Blue Fairy".

- It's 1:57 AM

- I know i am acrophobic (fear of heights), but i'd glady stand on the 8th floor to get a kiss from you

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Fuck Parental Advisory

<------------------------------------>

Clubs that actually took me in

http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8286491/ Mon, 27 Mar 2006 16:04:53 PST
My Dark Art | My Airbrushing | My Misc | My Designs | My Scarps

The problem with living in Anarchism is that no one can tell you that what you are doing is not art. Everything you see around you is accepted as a work of art, whether it was a piss you made on the wall of your building, or the photograph of a chopped of woman you took, its all art to some people.

I made it to a page (by mistake) called : "Murder and Art - The DeviantART Connection" written by one Kit Jarrell, a former administrator on DeviantART. Here is the [link] to the article.

In briefing, the article talks about two cases in which DeviantART members have been involved in real murder. One was a 17 year old girl who was murdered by a former member that goes by the screename "Skullz" (the account has been disabled), and the other is by a girl who goes by the name "Chaos" (same story), that apparently killed her classmate (who was also a member of DeviantART), after leaving threatening comments on her user page telling her that she is going to kill her.

While this is very sad news, i am pretty sure that there is much more to it than just these two cases, and that DeviantART is the home, of in fact, many troubled minds who come here to seek out something they can't find in their lives.

Sadly, on DeviantART, there is no such thing as "its way too much!". Everything is allowed on DeviantART, except perhaps ripping off anothers work, or using pictures without permission. When it comes to these two things, the admins act without thinking twice and rush up to show their powers on the website by their abilities of deleting "illegal" pictures.

When it comes to defining what is appropriate as art, the admins just take a backseat and enjoy the show. There are more horrifying pictures on DeviantART then all horror movies combined, and to make things worse, sometimes these pictures are rewarded by getting more exposure as being the "daily deviation" or even "Print of the Day".

For example, today, I saw the most disgusting, horrifying, mentally disabled picture i have ever seen in my life. Yes, its worse. The picture can be found at this , but please please be careful, the picture is of utmost violence and gore, and its not suitable for underage children! [link]

How can we allow such pictures to be in here, while we all know that it will affect others in one way or another? Is gore really art? Is the fact that someone can pour blood on himself, throw needles right into his face and take a picture make him labeled as "artist"? What is the purpose of such art? Tells me, under which category of art does it fall and what does it represent?
Should we reward today's criminals and mentally disabled by recreating their scenes and label them as "ART"? What is the meaning of this?

But then again, how can we, as members, complain about such scenes when our very lovely admin, +suzi9mm is most famous by her "gore" and "murder" pictures?

Is this a work of art? > [link]

How about this? > [link]

Perhaps this? > [link]

Murder is not enough, maybe Cutting is [link]

Or even, cutting AND incest is Art > [link]

Suzi9mm, or JEN (her real name) uses her super popularity, ( an account with 3,701,962 pageviews & counting) to transmit her images, her twisted ideas and her gore unto people, without any caution on who these people are, whether they are underage, whether they are mentally disabled, whether they are looking for ideas to commit murder, something that has already happened TWICE on DeviantART, and i am sure there are more.

To relieve herself from the responsibility of he... ]]> ~sergiofx Dear Forwarders... http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8154713/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8154713/ Mon, 13 Mar 2006 23:14:40 PST
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Dont you hate those people who forwards mails to your hotmail/yahoo/AOL inbox with promises that the more people you forward to, the more of good luck you will recieve and some shit like that? Check this one out...

dear forwarders
SAY IT WITH ME ...

1) I will NOT get bad luck, lose my friends, or lose my mailing lists if I DON'T forward an email!

2) I will NOT hear any music or see a taco dog, if I do forward an e-mail.

3) Bill Gates is NOT going to send me money, EVER!!!! Victoria's Secret doesn't know anything about a gift certificate they're supposed to send me.

4) Ford will NOT give me a 50% discount even if I forward my e-mail to more than 50 people!

5) I will NEVER receive gift certificates, coupons, or freebies from Coca Cola, Cracker Barrel, Old Navy, or anyone else if I send an e-mail to 10 people.

6) I will NEVER see a pop-up window if I forward an e-mail...NEVER--NEVER!!

7) There is NO SUCH THING as an e-mail tracking program, and I am not STUPID enough to think that someone will send me $100 for forwarding an e-mail to 10 or more people!

8) There is NO kid with cancer through the Make-a-Wish program collecting anything! He did when he was 7 years old. He is now cancer free and 35 years old and DOESN'T WANT ANY MORE POST CARDS, or GET-WELL CARDS.

9) The government does not have a bill in Congress called 901B (or whatever they named it this week) that, if passed, will enable them to charge us 5 cents for every e-mail we send.

10) There will be NO cool dancing, singing, waving, colorful flowers, characters, or program that I will receive immediately after I forward an e-mail. NONE, ZIP, ZERO, NADA!!

11) The Red Cross will NOT donate 50 cents to certain individual dying of some never-heard-of disease for every e-mail address I send this to. The Red Cross RECEIVES donations.

12) Hotmail will not track if I have sent the e-mail to 8 people to see who is still using his account. They will not close down my account, they would have done it already after 3 years from when this e-mail was first sent.

13) And finally, I WILL NOT let others guilt me into sending things by telling me I am not their friend or that I don't believe in Jesus Christ. If God wants to send me a message, I believe the bushes in my yard will burn before He picks up a PC to pass it on!

Now, repeat this to yourself until you have it memorized, and send it along to at least 5 of your friends before the next full moon or you will surely be constipated for the next three months and all of your hair will fall out!

+ ~sergiofx Thoughts of the week + movies + featurette http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8086617/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8086617/ Mon, 06 Mar 2006 17:45:40 PST
My Dark Art | My Airbrushing | My Misc | My Designs | My Scarps

This is a long journal, so, if you are in the mood to read about pretty much everything that's on my mind right now, keep on reading!
these are the topics I will talk about:

Thoughts of the whole week
Coming Soon movies
Featured Artist

Thoughts of the whole week

27/2
Expressing using words. For me, this is the lowest, unmeaning and worse way to express oneself. Words are not powerful, they are not weapons, they are nothing. Sticks and stones.... I can just sit for hours and tell people what they mean to me, trust me, I CAN, but it would all be lies, so what is the point of talking?
I have heard enough promises from grown up, broken promises that is. So much in fact, that i lost count throughout the years. My dad kept promising me stuff and every time I believed him, he would turn and do what he wants, from the time he promised he wont leave us, while i was sitting on his bag of clothes at the age of 8, till the day he told me he was going to change and went the next day and bought a car at the age of 18. I have heard enough people talking in my life and understand they were full of shit to make me hate everything related to expressing with words. AT least writing them could be a better way. I remember I can just sit with people and they would ramble on and on and on about nothing, not caring what I have to think about them or anything, and they keep talking. Its like, i know i can just stand up and leave, and they would continue talking, not realizing they are on their own. But that's the problem with a big talker who is full of shit; he thinks he is alone in the world.
Plus, expressing emotions in words doesnt work for me. Sorry about that (you know who you are), but words are nothing. Its the way you ACT, its what you DO, its how you UNDERSTAND the other that defines if you love him or not. My mom, in nearly 20 years of my life, told me she loves me about 3 times, and I can remember each of them. Does that make her love me less than my dad (again about him) who had basically showered me with "i love you" all my life? Lets see: My mom worked three jobs when dad left, she used to leave at 6 am and return at 5 pm, and still, has time to sit down and correct homework and exams (she is a teacher), and she put me and my sister in a great school, and we both ended up in university of good standards. My sister in USJ and me in AUST. While my dad used to sit around, he worked in 1 job, leave the house at 7 and return at 2, spends money on himself, never thought of buying me or my sister a piece of junk car, while he bought 13 cars in 10 years for himself. So, who loves more? Who showed more love? Who expressed love more?
Please... words mean shit.

1/3
What does it mean being friends with someone from the opposite sex? Does that really work or is it just some kind of fantasy that everyone does but no one talks about?
If i look at my life, there is a pattern in which I see myself friends with more girls than I care to count. It got to a point where it would actually bother me, thinking there must be something wrong with me. But now that I think about it, every girl I was every friends with fell into one of two categories: Either she was someone I used to date and we remained in contact (1), either she was someone I like but can't be with for carious reasons (2).
Basically, its just the same, starting with my liking the girl as a girl, and not as a friend, than it would shift, or more like, I would make it shift into the friendship that becomes really strong later. So, what is this kind of friendship... ]]> ~sergiofx Choices - Part II http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8001736/ http://sergiofx.deviantart.com/journal/8001736/ Sat, 25 Feb 2006 17:48:48 PST
My Dark Art | My Airbrushing | My Misc | My Designs | My Scarps