http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:simon-noir&section=today deviantART RSS for by:simon-noir en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 08 Dec 2009 11:24:08 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/8364638/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/8364638/ Tue, 04 Apr 2006 14:34:05 PDT
I'm looking to get a new car, that means I need money, and that means you should commission me for work.

My car costs around $20,000, so this will be a long process.

But I have nothing to do with my time, so take advantage of my lack of a job, and hook me up with some cash. I'll draw anything, mostly Furres or Alcoholic Santa's, but I've gotten a lot better.
Adult work is cool too, so if you want some yiff... can do.

Send me a note with what you want, and I'll quote you a price. (It wont be a lot)

And Conner, I know it's been almost 2 years, but I'll get it done yo.

~Ciao~
Nate [the trash kitten] ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/8277902/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/8277902/ Sun, 26 Mar 2006 18:51:40 PST
Of course it does, so why the fuck are we being imprisoned? I'll tell you, the greatest enemy of the American people is Religious Fanaticism, the over-zealous Christians. I have no problem with their faith, or their god, but the thing I do have a problem with is their inability to see past the fact that other people might not have the same faith as them, or any faith at all for that matter.

Everywhere I turn I see "God this" and "God that", why the fuck should I care? I don't believe in God, I believe in myself and not much else. The Christians seem to think that everything will be OK once everybody joins their faith. Did it ever dawn on them that the reason that this country is supposed to be so great isn't because of the religion that they force down everybody's throat, but the diversity that is found right here in America.

The different Religions, Beliefs, and Sexual Orientations that are accepted by many are what makes this country such a great place. The problem is that the Bible has invaded the White House, and due to the "Morals" found within its pages, the Christians are ruining the one thing that sets this country apart from the rest of the world. It's a lot like Nazi Germany, where there could only be one people and one faith, and we all know how that turned out.

In short, Christianity has become a Corporation as appose to a faith, and that's wrong.


Please, correct me if I'm wrong… ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/8222822/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/8222822/ Tue, 21 Mar 2006 00:16:17 PST
As one of the last free thinking people in America, it is my duty to inform the masses. Iraq is the new America, and we have become the British.

Think about it, back in the 1700's Britan had a very strong military presence in North America, they were forcing us to do things we didn't want to do, they took away our weapons, they took advantage of us, why? Because they had power. So what did we do? Well, we kicked their asses, that's what we did. We defied the British rule, gathered weapons and troops, used guerrilla tactics, and had violent demonstrations against the occupation. We, Americans, engaged in Terrorist activities against the British.

Now, think about what the Iraqi insurgents are doing... Just think.
They're no different than the Minute Men of the revolutionary war.

We are in their country, we're forcing beliefs on them, we're killing them, we're the British. So what did we expect them to do? Quietly comply with our every demand? Of course not, they got tired of it, and now they're pissed. But for what ever reason, America is shocked and suprised that the Iraqi's are doing this.

AMERICA, YOU'RE STUPID!!!!

If you think I'm just spouting off shit, you're dumb as fuck.
If I'm doing my job right, I will have at least spurred the slightest bit of doubt in even the most die-hard Gee-Dubya follower.

Please, I don't say this to piss you off, I say it because it's true. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/8071111/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/8071111/ Sun, 05 Mar 2006 04:35:31 PST
From beginning to end, there are no words that I can find to describe just how mercilessly horrible this movie was.

Movies based on Comics are certainly taking a dive these days, first it was Fantastic Four, and now this. I will admit that the movie [for the most part] was complete eye candy, with color changing clothing and hair, sword fights, gun battles, and martial arts a plenty. But the movie lacked anything that a third grader could call a story line, and if there was a story in there, it wasn't presented boldly enough to captivate the audience.

Some of the computer graphics were sub-par as well, smoke, fire, breaking glass, and explosions looked like they came out of a PS1 game.

With any luck, humanity will remember Milla Jovovich as Lilu from 5th Element instead of this, it really makes me sad.

The only thing that made going to see this movie worth while was the trailer for the Silent Hill movie [it should be in theatres April 21].

So, take it from me, avoid seeing this movie like it was the plague.

~ciao~ ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7700623/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7700623/ Wed, 25 Jan 2006 01:15:30 PST
This is because my computer has fallen victim to a hard core crash. It simply stopped working, in all seriousness, the fucker wont even boot up. Some sort of System 32 thing is missing and it requires a back-up disk to repair it, unfortunately, I lost that disk long ago.

So, hopefully, I'll have my computer running again next week, and then I can post all of the crappy drawings that have accumulated in my sketchbook.

Ciao for Now,
Nate [the trash kitten] ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7582032/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7582032/ Thu, 12 Jan 2006 10:27:12 PST
I am fairly sure that I am the least pro-active person to walk the face of the earth, and the sad thing is, I don’t feel bad about it. I realize that I probably should be ashamed that I’m a lazy wee bugger, but, for whatever reason, I'm not.

“Nate” I say to myself, “You should go out and look for a new job, that way, you can afford all those things that you need and want.”

But something about what my mind says doesn’t register with me, so, “Brain” I says to my brain, “I’d much rather sit here and waste my entire day playing Resident Evil 4.”

“Nate” My brain replies, “If you don’t get a new job, how will you pay for your next line up of games?”

“Touché” I says, “But with a job, I’ll have less time to indulge in hearty helpings of graphically superior violence and gore.” I then fold my arms and sneer defiantly at my brain. Stupid brain, filled with all of its infallible logic.

But I must be in submission to my almighty brain, for it is much wiser than I, and should be listened to.

For instance, my brain keeps suggesting that I get a car. A reasonable suggestion, but what prevents me from doing so? Nothing apparently, I just lack the personal motivation to go and do it.

Another thing my brain does, is try to keep me from harm. I decide that I want to jump off of my roof, why? Because it’s fun, obviously. “Nate” My brain says to me “Jumping off the roof seems like a bad idea, please don’t do it, for you lack health insurance.”

“Brain” I says to my brain, “I’m going to do it anyway, for not only do I lack insurance, but I also lack anything the resembles rational decision making.”
So against my brains better judgment, I jump off my roof with little regard to my own personal safety.

In case you were wondering, the voice of my brain is played by Liam Neeson, and the voice of myself is played by Sean Connery.

I guess the point of this is, I need to spend more time listening to my brain. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7520416/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7520416/ Thu, 05 Jan 2006 18:38:59 PST
I'm starting a overly optimistic fund raiser to get a new car.
So, I'm turning to the internet for help. It's like donating to one of the various charities out there, only this time you know who the money is going to and what it's being spent on.

Even the smallest of donations will be apreciated, just so long as I don't have to drive that screaming death trap ['80 Ford Fairmont] ever again. I just need to get a car that's a little more 'Fag-Tastic'.

C'mon friends, donate to a greater good, and help me get a car that will get me a hot date.

OH! And if you want something for your money, I'll also be taking comissions...

Remember, this will keep me out of a car that has a strong chance of killing me before my next birthday. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7333163/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7333163/ Sat, 17 Dec 2005 00:58:46 PST
I'm a big fan of Halo, as some of you know, and I'm always flippin' through teh internets to see what kind of cool stuff I can find.

Well I found a french made Fan-Game called "Halo Zero". The instant gut reaction to anything 'fan-made' usually consists of moans and groans in preperation of something truly horrible.

But much to my delight, the game is really well done, and has the actual sound effects from Halo. It's a 2-D side scroller, and seems to have had a lot of work put into it. The colors are bright and vibrant, and all of the characters are well animated.

You can find this game here [link]

If you like Halo, this game is a real treat. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7251329/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7251329/ Wed, 07 Dec 2005 21:40:07 PST
And if that wasn't enough, my hours have been totally cut at work, I'm now on an "on call" status, I have no set hours during the week, so that means I'm not going to get paid. I guess it figures, I'm a pretty lousy employee, I should get fired.

One of my best friends got promoted and is up for another promotion to become assistant manager, and he started the same day I did. I cant help but be a little jealous, I've been working my ass off and haven't gotten shit, but he just does his thing and gets a raise.

I guess No Fear isn't the place for Fags like me, I should probably cut my losses and just quit.

So aside from having no talent, basically not having a job, and being generally ugly, I should skip the rest of my life and wander out into the middle of the feeway and play tag with a tour bus. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7212248/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/7212248/ Sat, 03 Dec 2005 13:18:07 PST I’ve missed out on character design jobs because I lack talent, and people a lot younger than me get them instead. And between my job and working for my dad, I don’t have much time to practice drawing, and when I do have the time, I’m either tired and want to go to sleep, or I don’t have the muse to draw anything. I think I need to go take some art classes or something, maybe then I’ll develop the mad skills required to get a character design job, and then I’ll be taken seriously as an artist.
But then again, I don’t even have the time to work on my comic, much less go to school. I don’t want to be a total burnout, art is my passion and I want to be the best. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/6723176/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/6723176/ Sun, 09 Oct 2005 17:24:19 PDT
Well, Coming some time in November, I'll start posting my new comic. It's called "First Period", and it just a lot of romantic fun. I've been shut down by many publishing companies when the reviewed my comics, so I decided to go for an Internet comic, and see just how well I do.

Well, I don't have my computer yet, I'm using my friends' moms computer, so no posts yet.

Ciao for Now,
Nate [the trash kitten] ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/6383098/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/6383098/ Wed, 31 Aug 2005 22:29:14 PDT
If that wasn't enough, we're very poor, and I'm not getting enough comissions to cover the money we need to pay rent. We also have to register the cruiser and get insurance for it, and we sure as hell dont have enough money for shit like that. With a lot of luck, we'll be able to keep our apartment.

Our computer is down as well, I'm at the Safe House right now tapping this shit out, and it's very distracting with all the people around me.

But on the lighter side of the force, I've been drawing, and I'll have my computer back on the 16th, and I'll be able to post again. I've done a lot of Yaoi that is just wonderful and homo-erotic, I'm sure you'll love it.

Well, Ciao for Now. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/6193319/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/6193319/ Wed, 10 Aug 2005 23:50:36 PDT
In my next email to them, I asked what was wrong with us Fags, and if it was so imoral, why doesn't anyone really give a shit? Here's what I got back:

*Please hold laughter until the end.*

With the preponderance of evidence from God’s Word obviously forbidding homosexuality, why is it gaining acceptance and justification within our society today?

As mentioned previously, there are moral, social, and psychological reasons for homosexuality. It is for all of these reasons, that homosexuality has become one of our society's most controversial and openly discussed issues.

Rejection or ignorance of God's Laws is the foundational reason for all of our society's relationship problems -- including homosexuality. Rejection or ignorance of God's Laws is leading people into many different sins... which harm the family structure and affect the development of interpersonal relationships. As a result, some people in stressed families, develop homosexual attraction, and try to fulfill their needs through homosexual acts.


Society is more accepting of homosexuality, because God's Laws - explaining the way for human beings to meet their physical and emotional needs - are not properly understood or believed. This rejection of God's instructions is partly due to the false teaching of evolution -- leading society away from understanding and respecting God's supreme authority.


Another reason for acceptance, is open discussion about homosexuality, which has led to an increased awareness of human distress. Over time, society has responded to this distress by tolerating homosexual relationships. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5940832/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5940832/ Fri, 15 Jul 2005 09:22:36 PDT
K... I got a story behind this, ready?

My room is innondated with a vast assortment of video games (20+ consoles)
Problem: There is only 12 sockets on my power strip, so I need to alternate plugs some times so I can play different systems.

Last Night I was too lazy to dig around behind my entertainment center to find the power strip so I could plug in my Master System (at this poind I have 3 TV's and 4 consoles powered up) I decided that it would be a good idea to plug the master system straight into the wall by squeezing the wall wart in under the plug that led to the power strip.
I never stopped to think that the wall port was already under great stress providing 600+ watts of power to my gaming shrine. The second the SMS power supply entered the wall port, I was stunned by a beautiful shower of blue sparks. I was in awe, it was so dazzling, but my moment of utter captivation was cut short by what sounded like a shot gun going off in my room, and then the lights went out.

I went into the hall way and flipped the breaker, and then returned to my room to investigate the damage.
My SMS power supply had basically self-destructed, all that was left was the two tines that were sizzling in the wall port, the cable, and charred plastic bits scattered about my room.

Aside from the power supply and a black mark on the wall, there wasn't any damage.

Now here's a question: Does anyone have an SMS power supply they wanna sell? ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5768561/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5768561/ Mon, 27 Jun 2005 05:04:45 PDT
I've been searching high and low for the ultimate gamer beverage known as Bawls (with no success).

But as I randomly decided to go into a 7eleven on Speedway and Campbell, I spotted it, Bawls, and lots of it. I probably wouldn't have seen them if the clerk hadn't been fixing the soda fountain, but as I took hold of one of those bumpy little bottles, I lost feeling in my legs and dropped to my knees. I raised the bottle skyward in an all too victorious pose and shouted "The Quest is OVER!"

The clerk eyeballed me for a minute or two as I made sweet, sweet love to the bottle of the delicious (and rare) beverage. My room mates and I all bought some, but mine was the most important.

I need to explain something. I am a gamer, and a huge nerd, so this drink is an important part of my life. When I moved to Tucson, I expected my drink of choice to be easily located, much like it was in California, but to my dismay, this was not the case. I searched every convenient store and every super market, each time leaving in defeat and dissapointment. I was almost ready to start ordering them off of the internet, but thanks to a clerk that was making my life difficult, I am able to go down the street and buy these blue bottles of liquid bliss.

If you have never tried Bawls, or havent even heard of it, buy some. This will make you forget about every energy drink you have ever tried, it may even make you forget about coffee (maybe). It is made out of Guarna and excessive amounts of Caffeine, it WILL keep you awake, I promise.

We now return to our regularly schedualed program... ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5745740/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5745740/ Fri, 24 Jun 2005 15:06:01 PDT To where, you ask?
Central Tucson, a whole 9 miles north, I'm distraught!
What will I do without the car jackings and gang violence at night?! Why do I have to move to where it's safe to walk around at 3 a.m.? A place where I won't have to worry about getting shot if I wear red?
(I'm in the East Side Cryp hood)

Anyway, I'm opening for comissions.
My new apartment costs more, so I need the money for rent. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5652325/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5652325/ Wed, 15 Jun 2005 02:59:19 PDT
My mom has totally written me off, and she still thinks that I'm only gay because I think it's cool. She say's it's not who I really am, and that I'm not her son anymore.
Well Fuck Her, I'm better off without her anyway.

As for my Dad?
It went how I though it would.
Here's the run down:

Me: "Dad, I'm gay... 'splains a lot don't it?"

Dad: "Yeah...and?"

Me: "So it doesn't bother you?"

Dad: "Nope."

Me: "I just wanted to let you know, I figured it was one of those impotant things that a father should know about his son."

Dad: "I pretty much figured it out when you started 'hanging out' with Jacob every saturday night."

Me: "Oh."

Dad: "Yeah."

Me: "OK then..."

And that was that, I least some one in my family doesn't hate me.

There's only two people on my moms side of the family that don't hate me, my Aunt Karen and my Cousin Emelia. Emelia is a Lesbian, so my Aunt Karen undestands, she was the smart one, both her and Emelia thought I was going to be gay since I was about 3 years old.
Only two of my siblings will talk to me, my little sister Mary-Ann, and my older sister Keri. Sarah and Matthew don't want to have anything to do with me.
But my dads family don't give a good healthy shit if I'm gay, I love them.

But yeah, expect some art from me really soon. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5642362/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5642362/ Tue, 14 Jun 2005 01:15:58 PDT I was really nice about letting her know, and I was even polite for once.

Here's what she wrote:

"I heard about your move. I hope that you find what you are looking for.

As for being gay I am saddened to hear that you think so little of who you really are. Deciding to be gay isn't being true to yourself it's running away. Despite what some people think, gay is not a genetic thing, it's a sexual choice. There is absolutely no genetic link to such a thing. It's a psychological issue that needs to be faced rather than run away and hide behind such a thing.

I do still love you as my son. I will never stop loving you. But I cannot condone it. It saddens me to lose yet another child. But the choice is yours and I cannot stand in the way of your own choices. I just pray that you will never have to suffer the serious consequences for it. It's now between you and God.

I do miss my son for who he really is. I just wish that you really did know who you really were, but it looks as if my influence was not strong enough against the liberal and societal influences. I've always been honest and up front with you and I will not hide now and say it's alright with me because that would be a lie.

I will miss you. All my love,

Mom"

Isn't that the most fucked up thing you have ever heard?
I can't belive that mom is such a bitch!

Peace out yo. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5613939/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5613939/ Fri, 10 Jun 2005 22:19:39 PDT I soon realized that I was alone.

Over the past 6 or 7 months, I've been buisy helping people with their relationships. While doing so, I've neglected my own needs.

I haven't had a boyfriend in a long time.
I miss having someone that would hold still and let me draw them naked. Some one that would fool around or cuddle on the couch with me. Some one that would be there for me when I was down.

I have friends that are there for me, but it just isn't the same. I won't deny that they help me out all the time, but there's something missing in my life, and the sad part is; I know what will fill the void.

I see so many happy couples (gay and straight). I start to wonder if there is something wrong with me, something that prevents my own happiness. Why can't I find a boyfriend?
I don't want to be alone anymore... ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5135773/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5135773/ Wed, 20 Apr 2005 04:00:01 PDT I believe that people have the freedom to believe what they want, but should show respect for other beliefs.

I am pretty liberal in my views, and respect conservative views on various subjects like Guns and the Death Penalty. I like Guns and I think that America is being WAY too humane towards murderers, lethal injection is not the way it should be done, those people should be killed in the most painful way possible.

But there are things that Conservatives do that really piss me off. The way they function gets in the way of peoples basic Civil Rights. The Declaration of Independence and the U.S. Constitution are basically voided by Republicans and no one seems to notice or care.
The Preamble of the Declaration of Independence clearly says "WE hold these truths to be self-evident, that ALL Men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the Persuit of Happiness."
If that is the case, why can't gays get married? Why are people who aren't white the target of prejudice? Why are Christians forcing their religion on people?
Does that seem Equal to you?

It is in my personal opinion that Republicans find the Constitution to be an impedance to "Affective Government". They don't want people to have the rights that they are entitled to. Our president and the Republicans in the House of Representitives prevent us from being a free people. Anyone who can't see this is one of three things: A Republican, Naive, or Stupid... Most likely all three...

Republicans may say "We are defending Morality in America".
Thats Fine, but do it in a manner that does not effect my Civil Rights!
Besides, what is Moral? Depriving us of our Rights? I don't think so.

If we crucified George W. Bush, would it start a new religion?

I'm a Homosexual, I'm not Christian, and I smoke Pot.
I want to get married some day, I want to go to a meditate without Christian protestors outside the Temple, and Pot should be moderated but legal to people 21 and older.

I guess what I'm saying is, Read the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, then think really hard about what I said.

I leave you with some Green Day lyrics.

I wanna be the Minority
I don't need your Autority
Down with the Moral Majority
'Cause I wanna be the Minority ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5030724/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5030724/ Fri, 08 Apr 2005 01:33:19 PDT
But now I've got my muse and I'm drawing like crazy. I'm reworking my comission for ConnerCoon. I felt bad that I've taken almost 9 months to finish it, so I decided to rework it with my more developed skills. I'll post it as soon as I can.

Because I'm drawing so well, I've decided to start accepting Comissions again. Not so much adult work this time, I'd like to be able to post it on DA. None the less, I will do some adult comissions, but I'd like to keep it clean for the most part.

Well, back to work. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5000449/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/5000449/ Mon, 04 Apr 2005 17:58:05 PDT Help me, Help you, Help me get a free Nintendo DS.

Before you think that this is a scam, it's not.
I thought that this was all bullshit too, but my friend Mark was dumb enough to try it, and it FUCKIN' WORKED!!! I can't believe it, I thought for sure he would totally get conned, but he got a Nintendo DS for free, he didn't even have to pay shipping! Can you believe that shit?

All you have to do is create a new email account [in case of spam] Sign up, and then complete one of the free trial offers they have [I recomend the BlockBuster thing] and then you have to get four other people to do it.

And Thats It!

Thats where you come in, use me as your refferal to the site and complete one of the offers.

I'll do a free comission pic for anyone why actually does this. All I need is four of you to do it, and you can go on and have four people do it for you, and then you'll get a free DS [or other system, they have a few to choose from]

It can take over a month to get the DS in the mail, but it's worth it. After all, it's fuckin' free.

Do something for me that wont cost you a thing and I'll draw something for you, I Promise!

Tell your friends.

[link]
Link here.

I swear to God, Satan, Buddha, and every Wican Goddess that this works. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4949559/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4949559/ Wed, 30 Mar 2005 05:23:16 PST
So I have decided to sell all of the images in my gallery.
[not the Fett Armor and not the Freddy Glove]
But basically everything you see in my gallery is for sale. I don't know what the current list prices are on art these days, so just make me an offer.

I put my heart and soul into most of these pics, and now they might actually feed me.

If you are interested in purchasing some original art, note me or reply to this journal entry. Just tell me which piece and how much you are willing to spend.
[the more detailed the work, the more you should spend, lol]

But seriously, I'm so poor, and I desperately need moneys.
Please Help! ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4904438/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4904438/ Thu, 24 Mar 2005 21:12:34 PST
Ich entschied, diesen Journaleintrag auf Deutsch zu tun. Ich verbrachte die letzten Wochen verschiedene christliche Gruppen studierend auf dem Internet, und ich bin zur Zusammenfassung gekommen, daß sie ALLE ESELSCBohrungen!!

Ich wünsche, daß alle Bumsenwürfel wurden, jene Leute piss ich weg zu keinem Ende. Sie waren alle Rassisten und ich könnte nicht glauben, daß sie jeder hassen, egal was Nationalität Sie sind.

Aber ich erhielt rüber sie recht schnell, erklärte ich gerade ihnen, daß allen zum weg Bumsen und nach links Sterben und dann ich sie eine bösee Anzeige auf Deutsch, allen in allen ich eine gute Zeit bumsend mit jenen Leuten hatte.

Enjoy. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4842450/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4842450/ Fri, 18 Mar 2005 01:16:59 PST
Overall, his deviations received 206 comments and were added to deviants' favourites 73 times, while he commented 289 times, making about 0.93 comments per day since he joined DA. This means that he gave 14 comments for every 10 that he received.

His deviation with the most comments is Fred Krueger Would be Proud... with 12 comments, receiving an average of 0.85 per day in the first 2 weeks, while his most favourited one is So God Damn Happy... scary..., with 12 favourites, averaging 0 per day in the first 2 weeks. His most viewed deviation is So God Damn Happy... scary... with 105 views.

4 favourites were given for every 10 comments.

Every 6.1 days he uploads a new deviation, and it's usually on a Thursday, with 16 (32%) of his deviations.

His busiest month was May 2004 with 11 (22%) of his deviations.

The majority of his deviations are uploaded to the Traditional Art gallery (47), while his favourite category was Drawings > Anthro with 29 deviations.

Comments per deviation: 4.12
Favourites per deviation: 1.46
Views per deviation: 39.3
Comments per day: 0.66
Favourites per day: 0.23
Views per day: 6.35
Pageviews per day: 5.71 ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4820269/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4820269/ Tue, 15 Mar 2005 13:46:34 PST
It has been made clear to me that some people are really fucking stupid.

I've been getting emails and such from a bunch or retards complaining about me signing my name as "The Trash Kitten". Why? Because the fact that I am the Trash Kitten hasn't quite dawned on them.
I have one email that says [and I quote] "...the name Trash Kitten belongs to an artist on side7 named Nate Alig, I hope you asked his permission to use it."
You have to wonder if they were smart enough to look at my DA profile, or even pay attention to my email adress, or possibly the message I left on side7 saying that I'm moving to DeviantArt?...morons.

I thank Forsaken-Fox/Foxxian for the inspiration of this rant. No one seemed to care about that name change, whats the big deal with mine? I am the Trash Kitten, I've always been the Trash Kitten, I will always be the Trash Kitten, get a life outside your computer you stupid fat bastards.

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Different Topic.

On sunday I went to a Me First and the Gimme Gimmes show. I've been listening to them for a long time, and this was the first time I would ever get to see them live. The show was more hard core than I expected it to be. Half of the concert hall was a mosh pit, and consisted of around 90-100 people, all running conterclockwise and beating the shit out of each other, and where was I? Right in the middle of it of course, I spent most of monday nursing aches and bruises, and even now the side of my face still fucking hurts from asshole with a mohawk socking me in the face around 3 or 4 times.
I'n any case, the show was awesome, the band rocked, and I had an all around good time there. If you ever have a chance to see Me First and the Gimme Gimmes live, DO IT! You'll have a blast.

Later Days,
Nate Alig [the trash kitten] ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4723125/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4723125/ Thu, 03 Mar 2005 20:32:19 PST
I'm sure all of you have heard the rumor that Spongebob Squrepants is Gay, or that he promotes homosexuality.
One Right Wing Conservative group calls him "...A secret agent of the Homosexual Conspiracy..."

I don't know about you, but I didn't think that us Gay people had the motivation to Conspire against anyone or anything. We don't really care what people think, if we did, do you think that we would be openly Gay? Of course not.

Besides, if anyone in that cartoon were Gay, it would have to be Squidward. He's a forty-something man living in a lavish and clean house, he's a anal retentive artsy fartsy little dweeb, and he plays the fucking clarinet! SQUIDWARD IS THE GAY ONE!

I'm also pretty sure that Sandy is a Lesbian, she's way to masculin to be a girl... yup, she's a total Bull Dyke.

And Spongebob is so straight. He lives in a tropical themed bachelor pad with a pet snail. If he were gay, Gary would be an expensive Cat or Ferret. And look at the way that he dresses! He wears ugly low tops, brown shorts, and a red tie... Brown pants with a Fucking RED TIE! No self respecting gay man would ever wear something like that! Color coordination is very important to gay men, and they wouldn't be caught dead in brown pants in the first place.

And what about Bugs Bunny? He was a cross dresser! A total Drag Queen! And he kissed Elmer Fud on numerous occasions! WTF!?

There are Gay people, there has always been Gay people, there will alway be Gay people. Fucking gte over it! ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4689200/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4689200/ Sun, 27 Feb 2005 23:40:29 PST
I'm never going to date anyone ever a gain. Dead serious.

I'll still be gay [I think] But instead of looking for Mr. Right, I'll just spend my days drawing, playing music, and making my awesome Goth wear.

I don't want to sound cynical, I'm just tired of the pointless search for happiness. I'm broody, dramatic, and given to excessive romanticism. There isn't anyone who should have to deal with me hating myself on a daily basis, I'm destructive, emotional, strange, loud, depressed, depressing to be around, critical of myself and others, and an all around pain in the ass.

I'm just going to be the sexless fag that spends his time designing clothes for other people, and following my girl friends around, telling them what looks good on them, and go shopping with them.

I'm totally OK with this.

I finally got all of this shit around my fucking head, and I'm through. Happiness always leads to pain, so why bother...
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On a lighter note, I'm coming home soon!
I'll be returning from Tucson AZ on the 2nd of march, and all of you who keep emailing me every fucking day will be able to tell me all the shit that cant wait on one of my numerous IM aplications.

God you people piss me off...
Fuck You...
...
...
Just kidding, I love you all. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4658707/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4658707/ Thu, 24 Feb 2005 00:24:20 PST
Some one very important left me a few days ago.

It hurts to think about. But I have to say something, otherwise it will build up inside me and I'll go crazy.

Otter, the boy I loved so very much, called me Feb. 20th, he was livid about my last journal entry, and yelled at me for well over an hour. He was upset that I would even look at another guy. He did it all the time, and not once did I ever get upset, jealous, or angry at him. But when it came right down to it, he decided that he'd break it off with me. For the first few hours, life was a blur. I was pissed, angry, emotionally distraught, heart broken, and hurt deep down.

But now, I miss him. I never felt that way about anyone, and now he's gone.

Just kill me. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4626513/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4626513/ Sun, 20 Feb 2005 02:31:42 PST
Well, Tucson kicks Ass!
There so much to do, and the people here are really fucking friendly. The weather is awesome, actually there is two types of weather here: Sunny and Thunderstorms. And the lightning is fantastic, it so flat here you can see the lighning from 30+ miles away!

They have a weekly Rocky Horror Picture Show here, and it is so awesome. Which reminds me:

Some One Please, KICK Me In The FACE! While I was at Rocky, I saw the cutest, most sexiest, most adorable goth boi. He was so gay, and he was totally checking me out, but did I talk to him? NO! I didn't say a fucking word. Why the hell do I have to be so timid around cute guys?! I wanted to go up to him and congratulate him for being so damn hot, and also to get his number.

I'll see him at Rocky next week, and I'd better talk to him, otherwise I'll kick my own ass if no one else will.
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I'll update again as soon as something else cool happens.

Later Days,
Nate Alig [the trash kitten] ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4595957/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4595957/ Wed, 16 Feb 2005 07:04:14 PST
I hope to have a good time, can't imagine why I wouldn't. After all, there will be the Rocky Horror Picture Show, shows at the Safehouse, and all sorts of interesting punks [and maybe some cute boys] to hang out with.

It'll be a 14+ hour drive from here to there, and I plan to sleep most of the way.

I'll be returning by train on the 2nd of March by train [9+ hours].
I'll try to get online for some updates while I'm down there, but no promises. I'll miss yuo guys [you know who you are] especially Skets. And I didn't forget about you Otter, you have full permission to Glomp the ever living shit out of me [and I know you will].

So, Later Days People

Nate Alig [the trash kitten] ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4534092/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4534092/ Tue, 08 Feb 2005 22:31:10 PST
I have no muse, it's dead, gone, kaput! I haven't been able to draw a god damn thing in weeks, and quite frankly its starting to piss me off to no end!

Now children, it's time to play "Good News-Bad News"

Good News: I'm back home for good now.

Bad News: I'm taking a trip to Arizona in a couple of Weeks.
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I supposedly have a cult following in the Tuscon area, so if any of you are reading this, I'm on my way and I'll be staying with Kaylie Maxon.

I also had my good friend Vanessa leopard print my head! It looks pretty fucking awesome, I'll post a picture of it as soon as I can.

I also need to come out to my dad, being a closet case sucks monumental ass hole. So dad, if your reading this... I'M GAY!

And that all I have to say. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4340049/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/4340049/ Mon, 17 Jan 2005 04:06:48 PST
"President" Bush, where do I begin. He's the idiot son of an asshole, who turns into a whiney little shit whenever attention is taken away from him and his country.

Did anybody notice how blank and emotionless he was when the Tsunami struck India and Thailand? I'm sure he was pissed off about it because some other country outdid America as far as tragic disasters are concerned . So all the worlds attention turned away from precious little Bush's private little war with a country he only had a beef with because Sadam was mean to his daddy.

And when it came to giving money to help rebuild these stricken countries, good ol' George was like "We can give you $17 million, but thats all we can really afford right now."
Well guess what, our fucking president is spending $143 million on his precious Party this week, what the fuck is that self centered Homophobic Fucknoids problem!!? Couldn't we use that money for something worth while?! Like give it to the schools? Or buy body armor for our troops out in Iraq? Or donate to disater relief in Thailand?!! Or maybe we could use it for Cancer and AIDS research!!!! But NO, Bush has to spend it on some fucked up little celebration, paying for food and drinks and concerts and personal security!

I wish I could take all of that money away from him and give it to the people that really need it, and only keep enough to give America the greatest gift ever! A DEAD GEORGE W. BUSH!!!! Buy a gun and shoot the fucker right in the fuckin' face!
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And another thing that bothers me to no end is his problem with Gays getting Married!

He keeps saying "It's Morally Wrong" NEWS FLASH! Morality is based in Religion and there is supposed to be a separation of church and state! There should be a separation of Bush's head from his fucking Body!

Why not let gay people get married? It's not like they're going to reproduce, I guess Homosexuality is a concept that George Bush hasn't quite gotten through that thick fucking head of his. Whenever they show the footage of him coming out of that church he goes to, I secretly hope that in the next few seconds his head will dissapear in a spray of blood, brains, and skull fragments.

At least Dick has compassion for the gay comunity, after all, his daughter is a lesbian.

I'd like to get married some day, but as long as Bush is in charge, that'll never happen.
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*Sigh* In 4 long years all of this shit will be over, and maybe we'll get a president that doesn't suck so much ass.

If there really is a god, he'll put the President out of our misery, the worlds bad enough as it is. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3959840/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3959840/ Tue, 30 Nov 2004 20:38:39 PST
I must share!

Nuttier than a Squirrel Turd...
Fat People are Hard to Kidnap...
Please tell you Boobs to Stop Staring at my Eyes!
Fight Crime [shoot back]
!Warning! I may be a Hazard to your Reputation...
I'm Cleverly Disguised as a Responsible Adult...
You laugh because I'm Different, I laugh because I Farted!
Bush... The Idiot son of an Asshole...
Damn Right I've been Naughty, Now Spank my Evil Butt!
333, half empty or half full?
Stupidity should be Painful...

I thought of these while I was alone in my room, I must be going through some streak of smartness after doing something terribly stupid.

What was the stupid thing I did you ask?
I bought a $179.95 [plus tax] pair of pants...
[yeah... me dumb...] ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3913897/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3913897/ Thu, 25 Nov 2004 01:58:58 PST
But there is this forum you have to go to. It belongs to my friend BaneWulfe, and she has a bitching web site that is terribly cool, and doesn't get the traffic that it deserves.
So go to her website [link] it's bad ass.

You should visit the forum, you can connect with all kinds of artists, you can post your art and get all kinds of feedback on it. Even from artists not on DA, thats what I like about it. All you really need for this forum is an EZboards acount, and you can get that at [link].

Now go my little minions and help bring this awesome forum to life, I command you! ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3904017/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3904017/ Tue, 23 Nov 2004 19:23:26 PST
When I was feeling down and alone, so many of you talked to me and expressed to me that you cared, and many of you drew pictures for me, and it made me feel better knowing that people would take time out of their day to help me.

I want to thank all of you for helping me through a tough time, especially Skets and BaneWulfe, who both showed compassion for some one that they have never met in person. You two are the greatest.

As soon as I have my life back in order, I'll start drawing again. I need to thank some special people, people that make me happy to be alive.

Thanx everyone, fur all of your help. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3875576/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3875576/ Sat, 20 Nov 2004 00:55:20 PST
A rift has come between my Dad and I. I almost never see him, and I dont know how to act around him anymore, it's like I dont even know him.

And I have a love intrest that I don't know what to do about, it's this first female that I've had an intrest in for like 5 years. And I was so sure that I was gay, now I dont even know who I am. It's like I've forgotten who I am and how to love myself, I hate who I am right now, and I just want it all to stop.

I cought myself digging into my arm with a sharp piece of glass, I didn't even realize that I was doing it. I had to wear a long shirt to hide the cuts on my arms, I was ashamed of what I had done to myself, I'm always the one telling people that cutting themselves is self destructive. I am such a hypocrite.

Nothing makes me happy anymore, I sometimes wish that I could just die. What is wrong with me.

My family wont talk to me, it's as if I've done something wrong... I can't help the way that I am, I just wish I knew why they hated me so much. My older sister is the only person in my family that want to have anything to do with me.

It's true what they say, you can have all of the friends in the world and still die unhappy and alone... I guess it's better that way, no one will miss you. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3683594/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3683594/ Wed, 27 Oct 2004 00:30:09 PDT
I never thought this would happen, but it did, I finally got a thousand fucking hits on my gallery!

Well, for all of you patrons and fans of the Trash Kitten, I will now go and draw the 1,000 Hits pic. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3655856/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3655856/ Sat, 23 Oct 2004 12:49:47 PDT
Some of you might have seen a show that was produced back in the 70's called "Bosom Buddies" starring Tom Hanks and Peter Scolari. It was a great show, what with the dressing in drag and all, and was borderline gay.

Well, in my dream, I was playing Peter Scolari's character and I was dating Tom Hanks, but the weird thing is, I never found Tom Hanks that attractive. And the whole time, I was dressed in drag, even during the parts when I was supposed to be wearing normal man clothes, like at the advertising agency and on dates with the character Amy.

Needless to say, it was very weird. After I woke up, I really needed a cigarette, and decided to go for a walk... not sure where I'm goin' with this, but anyway, I'm baby sitting my nephew right now... and stuff...

Bye... ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3653452/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3653452/ Sat, 23 Oct 2004 04:31:13 PDT
I am a pretty tellented actor [I'm bragging]
And I'm pretty [stating a fact]

There was a casting call for a movie in Dallas TX, so I sent in my 8x10's.

I got a call from a casting director at like 7 o'clock in the fucking morning, and I answered the phone like an ass hole. She said she wanted to do an interview, we agreed to meet at a small diner [very cliche] I got ready to go as fast as I could.

I got to the diner, and I see the woman sitting at a table, so I take a seat and we begin the interview.
I didn't go well, I was already pissed from being woken up, and then she started asking all of these stupid fucking questions, I was out of cigarettes, and to make matters worse, I started dosing off in the middle of the interview.

I just need some one to walk up and kick me in the mouth, I have to be one of the lamest people on the face of the planet. What kind of moron blows a feature film interview!?

Oh well, shit happens I guess...

If you see me, please... Aim for my head... ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3624751/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3624751/ Tue, 19 Oct 2004 06:07:05 PDT
A few days ago I was hanging out in a Safeway Parking lot, and this rather large Skin Head started bugging the shit out of me. He was sitting there poking fun at my Pink hair, and called me a Fag about 197,00 times, so I told him to shut his fucking gob.

He got up in my face, and I made some asshole comment about his foul breath and bad teeth, and that pussy ass fuckin' smacked me [and he said I was gay]

I proceeded to sock him in the mouth, and it didn't do much to phase him, so I picked up a shopping cart and threw it at him. Must have been fun to watch, I'm a 6' 2" scrawny bastard, and I tag this Nazi Fuck right in the face with a flying shopping cart. He goes down, and I decide that I don't want him to get up and kick my ass, so I drop the cart on him about eight more times [there was blood involved]

His friends came over to back him up or some shit like that, so I leaned over him and yelled "Congratulations! You just got your ASS kicked by a Gay Guy!"
All of his friends started laughing and fucking walked away!
I had a good laugh about it later...
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Well, I finally got AIM on my machine, so Kyojin and I can finally talk again.

And thats all I have to say tonight... Today [is 6:00 am] ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3539120/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3539120/ Fri, 08 Oct 2004 00:36:38 PDT
I dyed my hair Pink. It looks awesome, I have a picture of it in my scraps gallery.

I will also be taking commissions in the not too distant future, I let them pile up too quickily, and have been busting my ass to get them done, I still have two to finish. I'll get to finishing ConnorCoons commission pic as soon as my computer is running again.

And when my computer is running again, I will be online all the time. So now I can talk to Kyojin and LemurFox! I havent done that in a couple of months, please be patient with me, after all I'm Scotch-Irish so I'm either off causing trouble or I'm pissed [drunk] or sometimes both.

Well, it's late, I'm goin' to bed. G'night everyone. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3272092/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3272092/ Thu, 02 Sep 2004 17:16:40 PDT
Sorry about being away for so long, But I got booted out of my apartment by my bitch room mates [if you find them, feel free to beat them with the hooked end of a crowbar]

That and my computer suffered from some serious spyware, and is now being rebuilt.

But fear not young [or old] ones, I will soon start posting new art, along with some long overdue comission work.

Well, gotta go , I'll post again very soon. ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3000264/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/3000264/ Thu, 29 Jul 2004 23:28:59 PDT Much like emotions, there's so many of them, and each one needs to be handled differently, no two are alike.

It's far too overwhelming to handle. I just wish I could stop feeling, stop all of this pain, this suffering, this torture. The world would be much better off if there was no emotion.

I thing that the most painful emotion is Love, now there's a joke with no punch line. Love only leads to misery. If you love some one, they could leave you, or they could die, and you would be left miserable and uterly alone. And you will feel that pain until the day you die.

And that is why emotions are Bad... ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/2866061/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/2866061/ Mon, 12 Jul 2004 21:41:58 PDT
Here's an update: I am willing to do comissions for video games, but I'm specifically looking for Atari 2600 games and consoles, and Nintendo (NES) games and consoles. I doesn't really matter if the systems work or not, and I prefer the Atari 2600, but if all you have is (NES) thats fine. I'll pay the shipping charges on the systems and games, so it wont cost you anything. And the systems don't even have to work, but the games do.

So here's the game price guide:

Basic Sketch [no ink]: 5-10 games
Inked Sketch: 10-15 games
Color [pencil]: (NES) or 25-30 games
Color [computer]: Atari 2600 or 40+ games

As you can see, it's cheaper for you to pay with games than it is to pay for the comission in cash. And I want systems that people dont even play anymore. For the love of God, the (NES) came out in 1985 and the Atari 2600 came out in 1977, you can't even get these systems serviced anymore. And if you have a system that you just dont want anymore, you can send it to me for free, or I could buy it from you if you want to sell it.

So gimme gimme!!! =^.^= ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/2828676/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/2828676/ Wed, 07 Jul 2004 20:32:22 PDT
But thats cool, at least people are thinking about it. I'm working on a comission for ConnorCoon right now, but if anyone wants to jump on the band wagon and comission me, go fur it, I need the money... I want the money.

But yeah, I'm going to invest in an Atari 2600 'Heavy Sixer' as well as an old NES [god I'm such an 80's baby] that'll be cool, but first I need to take care of bills.

Yeah and stuff.

But seriously, please, if you want to comission me, just do it. I will 'Love you long time' ]]> ~simon-noir http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/2795475/ http://simon-noir.deviantart.com/journal/2795475/ Sat, 03 Jul 2004 13:35:43 PDT
God I'm such a loser....

But yeah, right now I'm listening to the album 'Last Rights'. Mourning my stupidity, and wishing for death to come. I really don't deserve to be alive right now.

But on a lighter note, I'm feeling much better than I was a few days ago. However, I fear that some of the stuff that I've been blowing out of my nose and coughing up, may be pieces of my brain. I can literally feel myself getting dumber, but I feel that I deserve it, after all, I SKIPPED OUT ON F*CKING SKINNY PUPPY!!!!

{I need to get over that}

Now that I'm feeling better, I can get back to finishing the comissions that I let Pile up... But if anyone want to add to my pile, please do [pretty please] I need the money. And remember, all of my prices are negotiable [god I sound desperate]

Anyway, I'm gonna get back to work.

{Note me ConnorCoon} ]]> ~simon-noir