http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:sizzlysatine&section=today deviantART RSS for by:sizzlysatine en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 22 Dec 2009 11:20:05 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/12962961/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/12962961/ Tue, 15 May 2007 08:21:41 PDT
So it's between the Sony Alpha, and the Nikon D40X. I'm leaning toward the Nikon. Any suggestions would help though.

Also it's summer and I made all A's this past semester. I am very proud and very excited about fall. This summer should be fun b/c I love where I work. I am excited about the beach vacation w/ Rossi. And I will probably get to go to Disney World w/ my best friend Kelley!

It should be a great summer!

]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/10415960/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/10415960/ Mon, 16 Oct 2006 18:22:25 PDT
Me and Dad went to 5 points and I got a few pictures of the homeless people. One guy kept saying he was a Legend. The story is that he won and Olympic Gold Medal like 20 years ago for wrestling. We are skeptical. But he was hard to photograph b/c he kept moving, so they probably didn't come out. He kept going on about he knew what he wantd out of life and he wasn't a stranger, he was a legend. I just went with it. Then he went to shake my hand and I knew I had to, but the he kissed my hand!!!! HAhaha, I felt kinda dirty. It was an odd experience I hope to not repeat anytime soon.

But I know I definitely got some damn good shots of Dad and some strangers at school. I will post those as soon as we get them finished in class. We already developed one Roll today so I hope we get the prints done sooner than when it's actually due.

Well, that's about it.
-Emma

]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/10373577/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/10373577/ Thu, 12 Oct 2006 19:54:25 PDT
Watkins College of Art and Design in Nashville, TN. We are going to visit it on December 2. Then if I really do like it then I'm going to apply for next fall!!

The photography requirements are a portfolio, pick and theme and submit two photos under that theme, an abstract photo, and a conceptual self portrait. I have some idea floating around for all. Then write two essays, one on...something and the other on why you picked that theme and anything I want the people to know about those photos. Haha, pretty easy right?

I'm really excited about it though. Ross would move up there with me, so I wouldn't have to be without him.

That's about it for me, wish me luck!

]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9988204/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9988204/ Wed, 06 Sep 2006 13:16:35 PDT
Now, they aren't the best quality just b/c they are scanned from slides. But you can tell that the original picture/slide is good from these. The original slides are really quite amazing. These are just not as sharp and a few are a little darker than the originals. So I apologize for that, it's the best I can do.

I hope you guys enjoy!

~Emma ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9750830/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9750830/ Wed, 16 Aug 2006 16:39:57 PDT ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9580506/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9580506/ Wed, 02 Aug 2006 18:52:09 PDT
And I see people just loving it.... Not that I mind. I know my own skills. Also I'm taking a class and I have been doing very well with exposure.

I dunno...I just dont get it. All I know is that I love photography. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9545732/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9545732/ Sun, 30 Jul 2006 17:52:24 PDT
So I show up not knowing what to expect and the photographer hands me a Canon Digital camera with this huge lens and tells me to shoot. I got to shoot whatever I wanted, and he'd also give me stuff to photograph to help him. He looked through them periodically and he said they were good. He also said I have a good eye!!! So he's even including them in with his and they might actually end up in the photo album the company usually makes the couple!!! How cool is that? I will also get a disc so I will definitely be putting some up here.

So good things are happening around here lately. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9380471/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9380471/ Fri, 14 Jul 2006 22:28:46 PDT

I put up some new pictures. They were taken w/ my 35mm recently. Naturally more turned out very well, but they look shitty on the CD but great on that glossy paper. DAMN.

Anywho, Love you all! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9146214/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/9146214/ Thu, 22 Jun 2006 09:28:56 PDT
Well...to get right to the point. My cousin Tim died of an OD. He was...my age, just graduated. Back in the fall he went to Bradford for his addiction, came out and he was better. I sent him letters while he was there, and I sympathized with him. I heard from my mom how much he'd appreciated that. Then I saw him at Christmas, but I was so out of it from being sick...I dont remember much. Saw him at Easter recently. He wasn't even the Tim I've always known. He was hyper and he talked to Ross alot about drugs. It really saddened me to see him like that.

He's been working with people who do drugs and his brother Chris warned him about it. Then his family confronted him last night. He got angry and said he was gonna move out today. They found him in his room this morning. The funeral will probably be saturday or sunday. Meg is even coming home early in order to be there.

So b/c of all the recent events, plus Meg coming home, I've decided to postpone the desperate search for a job. If I actually got one then I'd have to have this weekend off, then next week to see Meg, then whenever to get my teeth out. So is it really worth it? I dont want to have to work around a schedule next week in order to see my sister. I mean, I can wait another few weeks for a job so that I can see my sister before she leaves for a year. I dont care if I can't pay bills or if I have no gas money. It'll be worth it in the long run.

On a happier note. Last night Ross took me out to Brio for a fancy dinner. We got all dressed up! Then we went and ate cheesecake and cupcakes at B&N. It was an overall good night...I'm glad we did something like that.

Well...I'm gonna go. Oh yes, I am going to see that photographer guy today about a job. I'd be an assistant to one of his 3 photographers he has working for him. Then eventually I'd start taking pictures with them, and maybe even do a wedding on my own. I'll find out more today. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8830005/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8830005/ Sat, 20 May 2006 22:13:46 PDT
So exciting things to come. Hopefully I got some good shots while I've been home. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8671556/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8671556/ Thu, 04 May 2006 12:06:14 PDT
so...6 random things about Emma:

1. I love my family...alot. I'm a major home body.
2. I love love love white wine.
3. I love just about anything gothic.
4. Death and the afterlife have fascinated me lately.
5. I would DIE without my Ipod.
6. I'm actually starting to love my photography. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8647058/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8647058/ Mon, 01 May 2006 22:34:55 PDT
Hopefully all the new ones are good. I think they continue to get better. I'll probably continue to put lots up for a few days to come.

So enjoy! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8591559/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8591559/ Wed, 26 Apr 2006 12:31:32 PDT
Easter weekend I took many pics w/ my moms 35mm...so I hope to get those developed soon and put them up. I hope a few turned out decent.

Also next weekend when I go to visit Jason I should be getting photoshop...then maybe I can learn how to work it and maybe it'll help me.

Who knows.

The point is...hopefully I'll be able to put up something new soon. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8443149/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8443149/ Tue, 11 Apr 2006 21:30:29 PDT
Also I got the ok from mommy today that Ross could come this weekend for Easter. Yay, not only do I get to go home, but Ross gets to come as well. He's very excited. Hopefully we can hang w/ Hannah Saturday night some time. Then Sunday is Church, the Easter Bunneh, and going to Gran's to eat ham and yummeh foods. Yay Yay Yay! i'm super excited! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8338588/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8338588/ Sat, 01 Apr 2006 22:41:29 PST
I'm exhausted as well as sick. I totally threw up during my firt flight home...not fun. I hope I feel better tomorrow.

A picture post will be happening soon. Also I hope to be able to send the stuff I got for a few of you out after my next paycheck.

Love you all. Em. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8273353/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8273353/ Sun, 26 Mar 2006 10:09:38 PST
I will be taking many photos, and hopefully a few will be worthy enough to be put on here. So...I'll hopefully be posting many photos when I get home next weekend.

<3 ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8161091/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/8161091/ Tue, 14 Mar 2006 16:24:05 PST
Anyway, check them out. They rock!

Hopefully I'll continue to regularly put up new stuff.

~Em ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/7814439/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/7814439/ Sun, 05 Feb 2006 23:18:12 PST ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/6983182/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/6983182/ Mon, 07 Nov 2005 16:59:25 PST
1. I one day want to be a Physician's Assistant.
2. My step-dad abused me...both physically and mentally. (wow...I don't think I've ever even thought that sentence.
3. At this moment I finally feel in control of my current life situation, yet I truly do hate the situation I'm in. If I could go back to two weeks ago...I would.
4. I love to read, I have about 10 books that I own that I have yet to complete.
5. All I want is to be in someones arms...to finally be happy and loved and content with my life.
6. I feel as if I'm never good enough for some people. And I hate that I get judged so quickly when I'm not even known.
7. Sometimes I want to just run away and start over. Where nobody knows me, or my past, or anything about me. To start fresh.
8. I would commit suicide if I didn't have music in my life.
9. I drive a champaign (?) colored Nissan Maxima...2002 model.
10. I miss my family more and more every day.
11. My favorite movie is Garden State.
12. I own 256 books...not including yearbooks and dictionaries and schoolbooks.
13. Sometimes I feel like I have no control...like I'm slowly going crazy.
14. I'm not a big junk food person. Honestly, I don't eat chips or cookies or any of that crap. It's weird. Maybe that's why I'm not fat.
15. I have so many health problems that sometimes I wonder if I'll die young.
16. I love money, and yet I despise it.
17. I never seem to be satisfied w/ things. I can't seem to keep a job. I constantly have to have nw music. A new show. Things have to constantly be changing or I freak out.
18. Later in life I want a cozy little house, w/ a little girl, and for it to be a home...I want it to have all the things I didn't have growing up.
19. I want to get out of Alabama.
20. I'm quick to share about myself and my past, but I'm slow to call anyone a true friend.

The only person I can think to tag is Hannah. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/6752663/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/6752663/ Wed, 12 Oct 2005 21:18:44 PDT -Emma ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/6176482/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/6176482/ Tue, 09 Aug 2005 08:02:47 PDT [ ] am in between
[ ] am short

[ ] am a blonde
[ ] am redheaded
[x] am a brunette
[ ] have black hair

[ ] have blue eyes
[ ] have brown eyes
[x] have green eyes
[ ] have hazel eyes
[x] have grey eyes
[x] and wear glasses
[ ] and wear contacts

[x] have braces (get them off my B'DAY)
[x] have freckles
[x] have piercings
[ ] have tattoos

[ ] have long hair
[ ] have short hair
[x] have mid-length hair

My nationality includes:
[ ] chinese
[ ] indian
[ ] taiwanese
[ ] japanese
[ ] hispanic
[ ] nicoya
[ ] puerto rican
[ ] chicana
[ ] italian
[ ] scottish
[ ] filipino
[ ] dutch
[ ] french
[ ] german
[ ] irish
[ ] greek
[ ] portuguese
[ ] polish
[ ] korean
[ ] jamaican
[ ] canadian
[ ] lithuanian
[ ] native american
[ ] russian
[ ] british
[ ] danish
[ ] african
[ ] scandanavian
[ ] armenian
[ ] finnish
[x] other (I dunno my nationality)

My favorite color(s) is(are):
[x] red
[ ] pink
[ ] yellow
[x] black
[x] green
[ ] blue
[ ] white
[ ] silver
[x] purple
[ ] brown
[ ]orange

Some things I've done/played include:
[x] soccer
[ ] cheerleading
[ ] dancing
[x] lacrosse
[ ] field hockey
[ ] hockey
[ ] football
[x] softball
[ ] wrestling
[x] gymnastics
[ ] track/cross country
[ ] basketball
[ ] baseball
[ ] golf
[ ] playing in the mud
[x] playing music
[x] hiking
[x] kayaking
[ ] camping
[x] horseback riding
[x] marching band

I am sometimes:
[x] annoying
[x] talkative
[x] shy
[x] funny
[x] serious
[ ] bubbly
[ ] spazzy
[x] fun-loving
[x] laid back
[x] strict
[x] hyper
[x] weird

I like _____ music:
[x] rap
[x] rock
[x] pop
[ ] country
[ ] hip hop
[x] r&b
[ ] slow jams
[ ] Christian
[x] classical
[x] techno
[ ] oldies
[ ] the 80s
[x] punk
[x] Metal
[ ] reggae
[x] Goth
[ ] Latin
[ ] 90's Grunge
[x] musicals

The pet(s) I have is (are) a:
[x] cat
[x] dog
[ ] lizard
[ ] rat
[ ] ferret
[ ] rabbit
[ ] fish
[ ] bird
[ ] other

Clothes I like to wear are:
[x] plain t shirts
[x] sweatshirts
[ ] stockings
[x] high heels
[ ] boots
[x] sneakers
[x] jeans
[ ] pj pants
[x] boxers
[x] underwear
[ ] dresses
[x] mini skirts
[x] long skirts
[ ] watches
[ ] necklace
[x] hoop earrings
[ ] toe socks (So cooomfy)
[x] flip flops
[ ] halter tops!
[ ] stilletos
[x] shorts
[x] sleeveless shirts

I like to wear my hair (in a):
[x] down
[x] ponytail
[ ] pigtails
[ ] messy bun
[ ] half ponytail
[x] scrunched/curly
[x] bun
[ ] crimped
[ ] with a bandana
[ ] French braids
[ ] lots of little braids
[x] Gel
[ ] hat
[ ] messy hot guy hair
[ ] sex hair
[ ] fauxhawk

I'm mostly labeled as:
[ ] goth
[ ] emo
[ ] prep
[ ] punk
[ ] hippie
[x] nerd
[ ] ditzy
[ ] hyper
[ ] happy
[ ] everything
[x] I hate labels! I'm just me!!!
[x] I have no idea

I eat:
[x] dessert every night
[ ] no meat
[ ] diet stuff
[x] healthy foods
[x] junk foods
[x] a lot of carbs
[x] lots of meat
[ ] salad
[ ] seafood
[ ] Mountain Dew

A typical friday night:
[x] mall with your friends
[ ] partying
[x] watching movies
[ ] going to the club
[x] staying home
[ ] babysitting
[x] hanging out w/ my friends
[ ] hanging out w/ your boyfriend/girlfriend
[ ] working while your friends are out having fun

Currently I am:
[x] in a relationship
[ ] single and loving it
[ ] crushing
[ ] single and looking for someone
[ ] just broke up
[ ] im not sure

Online, I use:
[ ] lol
[ ] sup
[ ]
[ ] lmao
[ ] stfu
[ ] ty
[x] j/k
[x] ttyl
[ ] g2g
[ ] ^^
[ ] T_T
[x] x_x
[ ] ^_^
[ ] o.o
[ ] x3
[ ] "LOLZOHEMGEE"
[ ] knai

I have :
[x] been kissed
[ ] lied to my best friend
[x] dyed my hair
[x] dressed punk ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/6168433/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/6168433/ Mon, 08 Aug 2005 12:10:26 PDT
If you would leave the classroom, repost this. It doesn't matter if you're straight, bi, or gay. It doesn't matter if you're catholic or not. Everyone is a human being and deserves happiness.


sooo, I'm watching Garden State. This is the ONE movie that never fails to make me so happy and filled with hope. It also, never gets old at all. I don't know why this movie is so special or amazing..maybe b/c this guy has lots of problems, but he finds his happiness in the end. So. maybe that means I'll find my happiness in the end.
I'm nervous about many things right now. This whole PA thing is new and foreign to me. I have to change my major so I get to talk to my new advisor sometime soon, but it's all so confusing. I have to take certaing tests I've never heard of, I have to apply for PA school and it's very competitive, I have to have experience...they suggesting shadowing a nurse or EMT, and other stuff...it's crazy! I'm also very nervous about my new job. It's just that initial...awkward...having to get to know everything nervous stage. I mean, once I get the hang of it I'll be fine...but my first few day I'm going to be miserable. At least it's only about 4 hours a day...not too bad.

I keep going back and forth on being happy or really depressed and scared about school. I mean, I love learning and school and I want to be a PA. But...I'm nervous about meeting people and getting to class and how it'll be and doing homework and keeping my GPA above a 3.0 (I have to in order to get into the PA program). Daddy did send me a sweet email when I voiced my doubts:

"I have no doubt at all. They are just very smart nurses. You don’t have to be a genius to be one.

I think you should seriously pursue it – the health professions are practically recession-proof and have a great future in this country thanks to aging baby boomers and a growing population.

As Voltaire said, “Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd.”

If you weren’t nervous about it, I’d be more worried.
Dale"



Mother is going psycho. She might have a slight reason...but not this much. She's really making my life hell. Which, in turn, makes me not want to ever go home again. I am going home on my birthday b/c I want to see my friends and damnit I want a birthday present!!!!

Ah...on that subject... Emma's Birthday is in 8 days! the big 18!!! I can buy porn, vote, and buy and AK-47. Yay. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/5597025/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/5597025/ Thu, 09 Jun 2005 09:10:58 PDT Mood: pissed off
Reading: Jonathan Carroll-Outside the Dog Museum
Watching: Amelie

My parents are pissing me off...I wish I was at work!

It's cool that I got a free week...that's cool. I like it lots.

Daddy found a VW 99 red Jetta for sale...I want it, but prolly wont get it.

]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/5079916/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/5079916/ Wed, 13 Apr 2005 16:11:46 PDT
You all should go to my lj and check out my prom pictures...they're B-E-A-UTIFUL!!!
Anyway..catch you all later!
Em ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4852768/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4852768/ Sat, 19 Mar 2005 09:19:45 PST
[ 1 ] First grade teacher's name: Mrs. Morris
[ 2 ] Last word you said: Ok
[ 3 ] Last song you sang: some Phantom of the Opera song no doubt.
[ 4 ] Last person you hugged: Ben!
[ 5 ] Last thing you laughed at: my dad dancing/singing in the car
[ 6 ] Last time you said i dont fucking remember: I don't think I've ever said that phrase....oh well.
[ 7 ] Last time you cried: ummm...prolly a week ago. Not too bad!
[ 8 ] What's in your CD player: A Perfect Circle, Emotive
[ 9 ] What color socks are you wearing: black argyle!!!
[ 10 ] What's under your bed: boxes and boxes of stuff
[ 11 ] What time did you wake up today: 6:30 a.m.
[ 13 ] Current hair: brown w/ growing out blonde highlights. And curleh!
[ 14 ] Current clothes: jeans, etnies, green shirt, fox hoodie...and on
[ 15 ] Current annoyance: my hair isn't dry yet
[ 16 ] Current longing: *sigh* to be eating. haha
[ 17 ] Current desktop picture: this fairy picture...very pretty
[ 18 ] Current worry: hmm...this damn term paper
[ 19 ] Current hate: My step-dad...
[ 20 ] Current favorite article of clothing: prolly my brand new jeans!!
[ 21 ] Favorite physical feature of the opposite sex: tummeh!
[ 22 ] Last CD that you listened to: It's been A Perfect Circle since last night
[ 23 ] Favorite place to be: big city, like boston. Or here at daddy's.
[ 24 ] Least favorite place: Home in the afternoons after school.
[ 25 ] Time you wake up in the morning: 6:00
[ 26 ] If you could play an instrument, what would it be: I can already play clarinet which I love...and also Violin
[ 27 ] Favorite color(s): green, purple, black
[ 28 ] Do you believe in an afterlife: No sure where I stand on that.
[ 29 ] How tall are you: 5'11
[ 30 ] Current favorite word/saying: any curse word...'specially "fuck"...or maybe "thats gay" hahaha
[ 31 ] Favorite book: Sleeping in Flames by Jonathon Carroll or Red Dragon by Thomas Harris
[ 32 ] Favorite season: Spring, early summer, and fall
[ 33 ] One person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to: Ke'Ala
[ 34 ] Favorite day: hmm prolly Friday or Saturday.

[[[ FUTURE ]]]


[ 35 ] Where do you want to go: College...Las Vegas! umm, Europe
[ 36 ] What is your career going to be like: something that interests me, something I love. Also, something where I can help ppl. Make a difference.
[ 37 ] How many kids do you want: 1, so that I can give them all the things they need and deserve and I didn't have.
[ 38 ] What kind of car will you have: prolly an SUV...like a Sante Fe!

[[[ HAVE YOU EVER... ]]]


[Gotten in a fight w/your dog/cat/bird/fish, etc]: hmm nope
[Been to New York?]: yes yes
[Been to Florida?]: yes yes
[Been to San Diego, Cali?]: nope, but one day!
[Been to Hawaii?]: nope, but seester has
[Been to Mexico?]: nope nope
[Been to China?]: haha nope
[Been to Canada?]: nope
[Danced naked?]: haha...yea
[Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day]: hmm it wasn't crazy, but I do dream things that eventually happen.
[Had an imaginary friend?]: nope, I dunno why...if it wasn't real then I didn't want it.

[[[ RANDOM ]]]


[Do you have a crush on someone?]: mayhaps...shhhh haha j/k
[Worst feeling in the world]: depression...deep deep depression where nothing seems to get better.
[What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning?]: the fact that I dont want to go to that horrid school.
[How many rings before you answer?]: depends on if I'm close or far from the phone.
[Future daughter's name]: I like the name...shit...what was it...*thinks* OHHHH, Aurelia!
[Future son's name]: Lucious or Lucien/Lucian
[Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?]: When I was young it was a bunny. A couple years ago it was constantly a bear. Now it's nothing.
[If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be?] hmm Forensic Scientist...the ones on site. or...geneticist...or neurologist...making new discoveries and such.
[Are you a lefty, righty or ambidextrous?]: Righty
[College plans]: duh!
[Piercings]: ears...though I think they're grown up. I'd like an eyebrow ring, but my familiy would flip!


[[[ THE EXTRA STUFF ]]]


[Do you do drugs?]: only the prescribed ones
[Do you drink]: haha yes...sometimes
[Who are your best friends?]: Meagan, Ben, Jason, Hunter, and Sandi...and Tiffany...and Seester. And Tim.
[What kind of Shampoo and Conditioner do you use?]: currently Pantene Pro-V or Matrix.
[... ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4823015/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4823015/ Tue, 15 Mar 2005 18:54:22 PST . Are we friends?
. When and how did we meet?
. Do you have a crush on me?
. Would you kiss me?
. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
. Describe me in one word.
. What was your first impression?
. Do you still think that way about me now?
. What reminds you of me?
. If you could give me anything what would it be?
. How well do you know me?
. When's the last time you saw me?
. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
. Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?
. How have I affected you?
. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
. How long do you think we will be friends?
. Do you love me?
. Would you hug me?
. Physically, what stands out?
. Emotionally, what stands out?
. Do you wish I was cooler?
. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?
. Am I lovable?
. What do you think my weakness is?
. Do you think I'll get married?
. What makes me happy?
. What makes me sad?
. Do you think I could kill someone?

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF:
» I died from suicide:
» I said I liked you:
» I kissed you:
» I lived next door to you:
» I started smoking:
» I stole something:
» I was hospitalized:
» I ran away from home:
» I got into a fight and you weren't there:

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY:
» Personality:
» Eyes:
» Face:
» Hair:
» Clothes:
» Mannerisms:
» Family:

WOULD YOU:
» Be my friend?
» Lie to make me feel better?:
» Spread rumors about me?:
» Keep a secret if I told you one?:
» Loan me some cash?:
» Hold my hand?:
» Take a bullet for me?:
» Keep in touch?:
» Try and solve my problems?:
» Date me?:
» Love me?: ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4703595/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4703595/ Tue, 01 Mar 2005 15:26:25 PST
On to other things. Life has been quite sucky for the past...oh...month! Well...I've needed something, something to change and I knew that I was gonna do something big/drastic and I think I finally figured out what it shall be. Well, prom, for some unbeknownst reason is really really important to me. Scott can't come, he asked. So...all this time I'm thinking, it'd be so very perfect if Tim could come! Well, I talked to Dad and he said that money from my accident is mine to do w/ as I like. Well, he said to think of this for 2 weeks and if I still want to, then he'll help me use that money to buy a plane ticket. HE WILL HELP!! OMG, then Tim could come and omgosh...I'd be so happy! I mean, lately I've just been so depressed. Honestly, nothing ever seems to work out for me...EVER. and if this were to happen, I think maybe I could make it through the rest of this horrid senior year. Ya know? So...here's to hoping. Though, I know it'll never work out b/c nothing EVER works out. I dunno, We will see!!!! Anyway, gotta go study for 3 tests. Later! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4622290/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4622290/ Sat, 19 Feb 2005 13:18:22 PST This morning I randomly woke up at 8, although I went to be around 12. Mom came in my room and said that we had to go to Lincoln to take Mike a resevoir for his insuline pump. So, we get ready and go do that, I had to drive. Then we went to IHOP and ate breakfast/lunch. It was ok, IHOP isn't my favorite place, I'm not big on pancakes. Then, we went to the Mall and I picked up Michaels phone. He got lucky that the ppl got it for him. Then, we went to Wal-Mart, where I saw Mrs. Joy...my old babysitter. It was cool to see her, I haven't seen her in sooo long! She's pregnant again and her daughter is almost 3. I enjoyed seeing her. We get home and I see that I got a letter from UAB, I freaked and ripped it open. Well, I didn't get accepted to the Honors Program like I wanted. I'm rather...very much so upset about that. I really wanted in and I probably didn't get in b/c of my stupid grades and my stupid ACT score. Gah...it's not even fair! I'm sure Carlin and Ashley got in *sigh*. I was having such a good day too, *big sigh*.

I guess I'll go now, before I get more upset. Later. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4592275/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4592275/ Tue, 15 Feb 2005 18:54:51 PST I'm working on fixing this.
later
EDIT: They're back *wipes sweat* YAY ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4512115/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4512115/ Sun, 06 Feb 2005 13:08:48 PST Anyway, I watched all 3 movies. Of course I loved Shakespeare in Love...I never doubted it. Anchorman was very funny and I liked all the cameo appearances, nice.
I just got done watching Wimbledon. All I can say is...that's one I'm going to have to buy. It was rather bittersweet. I loved the movie, it was amazing, and very well done on the tennis stuff. But, it just reminded me how much I used to love Tennis. I mean, it was the one sport that I could do and that I loved. I always wanted to be on the High School team but either Mike said I couldnt do it or mom said we couldn't afford it. Therefore I never tried, but I know I could have done it. I mean, what do you do when a parent doesn't even support you? Gah...and I've wanted to play tennis again for months now, this just makes it stronger. Yet, I dont even have my racquets if I were to want to play. Meg took them for some odd reason...and all my balls too. hmm, I'll have to get those back.
Anyway, I guess that means I'm a tad depressed...perhaps more than a tad.
mom and mike are in Fort Payne...they'll be here around 5...which sucks.
I'm out. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4487300/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4487300/ Thu, 03 Feb 2005 10:10:25 PST music: singing in the rain
mood: beyond miserable

I'm...as my mood said, miserable! Yesterday I started a book and I finished it this morning...how sad is that?! Also, I hate that I've been so sick and weak and tired that I haven't talked to Tim much. Like last night, we didn't talk long b/c I was so tired and that upsets me.
My parents go out of town this weekend. Yippee...I guess. I'm supposed to go to daddy's, but may not b/c I'm sick and Carla is getting over TB, so I sure don't want to get her sick or anything. So I might be staying here. I also don't want to go to the Grandparents b/c they're older and I SURE don't want to give them anything!! *sigh* It might be a boring weekend alone for me.
If I feel the way I do tomorrow, then I won't be going to school. I whole week of school missed, damn!
Anyway, I'm starving, later. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4477910/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4477910/ Wed, 02 Feb 2005 08:18:18 PST
Well, Yesterday I thought I'd never get better in order to go, but I finally got better. Then during the concert my nose started running and now it's all stopped up. I didn't go to school, again, today b/c I feel rather crappy. Mom is making me go to the doctor later on. Hopefully they'll figure out what's wrong with me.

I finally scheduled an orthodontist appt. haha she said that since I hadn't been in so long I'd have a 30 to 40 minute appt. JOY! Also, the ppl at the Kirklin Clinic finally called and we scheduled a tilt table test. The soonest they have is March 17, that that's when I go. But I do get to miss school. yay! Mom goes to Kansas City next Sunday and comes home on Thursday. Then today when she called to get off work for my tilt table test she found out that they're going back to Kansas City at that time so she can't take me. That makes me uber sad b/c she won't get to take me.

Also, in pointless exciting news. I am updating and playing around on the laptop...tis a tad bit hard to get used to, but I'm not so bad at it. though I can't get the wireless mouse to work...oh well. I like the laptop, I shall steal it!!! Mwahahahahahahaha.

Well, i'm off to shower and to the doctor. later. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4468783/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4468783/ Tue, 01 Feb 2005 07:02:48 PST Music: Green Day-Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Well...what am I doing home? Well, I'm sick. I thought I'd be fine today, but I guess not. During 1st period I started getting really nauseated. So, I went to the bathroom and if I had eaten anything this morning...I would have thrown it all up. More like I was dry heaving, not so fun. Then I called mom and she's like...can't you just stay? Well, NO...not when I feel horrid. I also felt really dizzy...and right now I feel nauseated, but there's nothing to throw up.

well, what am I doing on the computer?! Well...really I don't know. I'm hoping I'll start feeling better...doubtful. This appears to be the same thing I had before Christmas and right when school started back. What's the deal?!!! Fine, I'm going to go to sleep now. Later.

OH, Josh Groban concert tonight. I'm going no matter how crappy I feel...NO MATTER WHAT!!!! *sigh* I hope I feel better. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4440726/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4440726/ Fri, 28 Jan 2005 20:49:15 PST I didn't go to the Prague Symphony Orchestra OR Jupiter Sunrise Concert.
Tomorrow I go to POTO w/ Meagan and Tiff, fun. Then to House of Chen for yummy food.
I'm depressed
I'm tired
Later ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4404491/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4404491/ Mon, 24 Jan 2005 16:32:53 PST Everybody around me is happy, full of life. Yet, here I am, as always, constantly depressed. Sometimes I think I've found something to make me happy, but who am I kidding!? It's never really what I think it is. I make mistakes, I do things that make me so ashamed of myself. It doesn't help my peace of mind either. Everybody around me is happy, why can't I be happy?
I hate relying on a pill to make me happy, but what else am I to do? I can't seem to find happiness anywhere...it never lasts. I really feel like I'm going crazy, like one day I'll lose it all and be put in some psyche ward. Wouldn't that be humerously ironic?
I can't seem to work or accomplish anything. I'm giving up a trip to europe. Thinking about moving across the country. What the hell is wrong with me?!!! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4371013/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4371013/ Thu, 20 Jan 2005 17:19:27 PST We expected him to die...b/c he's old and he has lots of medical problems, but we didn't expect it so soon. I miss him already...but he's been out of it for a while. I remember visiting him when I was young w/ seester, I remember the stories he told, I remember how he loved to make us chicken (it was so good). They were so loving and I loved to visit him. I wish I could have seen him one last time before he died...just to tell him I loved him.
*sigh* I can't even concentrate enough to do my homework...so none for tonight. I wish Tim was here! I wish I could just hug him close. I can't even seem to cry...mom has been yelling and everything is building up, I can't find release...I'm going to explode.
The funeral is Saturday at 3...visitation starts at 1...it's being held in Gadsden, not B'ham.
I feel so numb...I guess I should go eat. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4343772/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4343772/ Mon, 17 Jan 2005 14:40:02 PST All I've done all day is laundry...and dishes. Gah, I wish I had my car! I would have gone to the bookstore or ANYWHERE...damnit!
Everybody has been gone most the day. Mike and Will went to see Series of Unfortunate Events. I'm currently watching Bebop, I'm on episode 4...methinks. Soo good stuff it is. Yes yes yes.
*goes to watch more* Later ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4329054/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4329054/ Sat, 15 Jan 2005 18:22:46 PST We also went to see "In Good Company" it was very good. I just love Topher Grace!!!
The whole day was rather depressing. We went to all these places that Tim & I went to...it shouldnt have upset me so, but it did. It just made me miss him lots. Also, the movie talked lots of marriage, it just made me want to be w/ Tim that much more. *sigh*
I guess I'll go eat now. Later. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4293832/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4293832/ Tue, 11 Jan 2005 11:34:04 PST Music: Clubbed to Death, from the Matrix

Yea...didn't go to school today either. I actually made a box pizza for lunch, then watched 3 episodes of Sex and the City. But I then stopped watching b/c I got depressed. Don't get me wrong, I love the show. Just, I get jealous b/c they date guys and they get to kiss the guys and see them and hug them. It just makes me miss Tim that much more. My current goal is to have enough money to go see him this summer for...a week or two.
I have finally gotten over my deep intense depression, but I still feel odd and a tad lost in my life. I still don't quite feel comfortable...but I'm getting better. I do know I won't ever be like I was in my life again...I guess that's the way it goes?!

On to happier news. I should go back to school tomorrow. OK...not the happiest news, but it's news nonetheless. I really need to get back motivated w/ school. I do NOT need to slack this semester...which is what I'm wanting to do. *slaps self* Nein! I'm ready for college...but then again I'm unsure on where I'm going to college. Why must everything be so hard? OH well...I'll decide and figure something out.
Later ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4283771/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4283771/ Mon, 10 Jan 2005 06:54:32 PST Also, my side hurts REALLY bad.

Anyway, first off, I love my wonderful boyfriend Tim more than anything in this world. He's so wonderful and supportive and loving. I couldn't possibly ask for anything more. I just know I'm going to spend the rest of my life with him.

I don't have much else to say. I'm gonna go and try to sleep some more since I didn't sleep well last night. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4237536/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4237536/ Tue, 04 Jan 2005 12:51:07 PST Music: Martina Topley-Bird "Anything"

I have never been so sad in my life. I have never cried so much in my life. I have never not wanted to get outta bed, or stayed in bed until 1:30. I have never been so depressed that I didn't eat (I've only eaten a bowl of cereal and some ravioli the past two days). I have never felt so lost, so empty. I have never missed anybody this much. I've never lost so much sleep over being depressed. I feel weak, I hate it. I feel stupid, I hate it. I wish Tim was here.... ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4227554/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4227554/ Mon, 03 Jan 2005 08:38:31 PST
I just got the call that Tim is safely back in Vegas, twas good to hear. I won't go into boring detail of what we did everyday. We saw the movies Blade Trinity and Meet the Fockers, both very good and funny. We watched King Arthur, Emporer's New Groove, Dodgeball, American Wedding...and many more. We ate at Macaroni Grill, Landry's Seafood House, Subway, Panera Bread, IHOP, and...maybe that's it? If I told you about what we did everyday, it wouldn't seem like we did much, but it was so much more. The first two nights we stayed in Meg's dorm, the last two nights we stayed in a hotel. Dad and Carla and many of Meg's friends met Tim, dad seemed to like him. They got along well and I was so happy about that!

The thing on my car...*fumes* it wouldn't start on Thursday night after we got to Meg's dorm, then it started Friday morning. Well, we were going to go to Brookwood and out to eat later but when we wanted to leave it wouldn't start. Jamie Bartell, Meg's friend who was there, said it was my battery. Well, it was too late on Friday and nobody was open. So we borrowed Meg's car and saturday we went w/ dad to get a new battery. While we're waiting for the battery to be put in they call and say it's really my starter and it'll cost 300 dollars! Well...we had to have it fixed, I felt bad. They told me that it won't always start b/c this things that catches when you start the car is slowly wearing out, so...i have an unreliable car purdy much. Poor van is slowly dying. That is why we couldn't come to J'ville...we really wanted to and Tim was SOO upset that he couldn't meet everybody. He will be back eventually and you all will meet him then. OK? I felt bad that we couldnt come, but what could I do? I didn't have my car Friday or Saturday.

I think I spent about 200 dollars during his visit. I paid for some stuff....when he'd let me! grrr. I bought him a cd though, then I bought my self the first season of SATC (It made me happy when I was sad about him leaving), I bought these cardboard star lantern things...they're SO cool, I bought a castle calender too...purdy cool I must say.

*sigh* he's gone and I miss him more than anything. It was amazing to have him here! After I finally got over the shock and got used to him, I loved it. No matter what we did, we had fun. Even if we were just lazing around or sleeping, it was all amazing. I mean, sometimes you're just with someone and everything just clicks, so perfectly! Like you think I'd be shy and feel weird doing certain things around him...I wasn't. I could eat around him and not feel weird. We could talk about anything and it was all so comfortable without any work at all! I really couldn't believe it. I loved hugging him and I loved how he smelled (hehehe I got one of his shirts and can smell him, hehe). And you all know how I'm always freezing, during the time he was here...I was never really cold at all. Gah, everything felt so perfect. I was so happy and content and...I love that feeling! I miss him, I miss touching him. He was tall...hehe, my head fit under his chin...twas funny. I can't explain what I feel for him or how he makes me feel. Just...it seems right, ya know? Like, when you know that something is perfect for you and you know that once you get it your life will be perfect...that's him...now all I gotta do is wait. That's the hard part. Well he supposed to call me back at some point. Sorry for being boring. There may be more to say on this subject...but I can't remember everything. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4097732/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4097732/ Sat, 18 Dec 2004 19:05:14 PST
I checked STI for my grades, here they be:

Alg 3-92 78 on exam
AIDE (duh) 100
Anatomy 92 85 on exam
Jazz band (duh again) 100
History...? (should really be an A b/c most of my tests were A's)
AP English...? (hopefully should be an A...I think he showed me an A)
Shakespeare...? (should have an A)

Tomorrow my familia is going to Douglasville, yes! We are going to eat at Olive Garden then go shopping and such. YAY. I am excited, I may be sick but by GOD I'm gonna eat and eat and eat.
Well, gotta go take more cough medicine. later ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4087470/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4087470/ Fri, 17 Dec 2004 10:56:23 PST Since there's no more exams I can get back to writing wonderful poetry. I have 3 to submit sometime today...I'll get to that shortly.
Today or tomorrow I'm taking the Batvan to get an oil change and new wipers and such. I actually cleaned it out today too, you can see the floor!!
Monday go to the doctor...or maybe today or tomorrow. Also gotta get my hair done at some point. Tuesday is JCOC/Key Club helping out thingy. Then right after that rush to Grandmothers for Christmas get together. Wed...Phantom of the Opera? Thursday...noffing. Friday...somebodys house. Saturday somebody's house. Sunday I should be at dads. WOOTOR!
Tim comes on ze 30th, unless it changes AGAIN. grrr. Thats in, uses fingers AND toes, 14 days!!
Anywho, I'm out of things to ramble about. Later guys! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4059590/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4059590/ Mon, 13 Dec 2004 16:42:12 PST I feel like shit peeps...did I just say peeps? OMG, i'm really sick
BUT, i have to study for anatomy...screw anatomy, screw you all
I'm going to bed...forever. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4043256/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4043256/ Sat, 11 Dec 2004 14:59:04 PST But, Ugh, America is such a horrid place. I am disgusted with it, I'm disgusted by our leaders and all that we are responsible for. I am almost ashamed to live in this country. We do so many horrid things and never think twice about it. Our leaders keep us in constant fear...and they thrive on it. They thrive on the stupidity and niavete of Americans. What's worse is people completely fall for it...even intellectual people! *screams*
Like, in Bowling for Columbine, he goes to Canada. Canada has just as many...prolly more guns than Americans and you hardly ever hear of death by shooting. It's rare. People there also keep their doors unlocked all the time...they aren't afraid of anything!! America isn't like that...no, we're a fucked up country that believes whatever our conservative leaders tell us, it's disgusting!

Onto other things before I make myself more angry. I can't figure out what to write my Elk's (MVP) scholarship essay on. It has to be about what secular leader of the past we would want to meet and what we would talk about and why. Well, I would choose Michael Moore, but can't. I have no idea who. People out there....help me with suggestions!
Also, I've been avidly studying my anatomy, seeing as I have that huge test in there both Monday AND Tuesday. I have to make a good grade!

I'm feeling much better, but am still a tad sick. Hopefully I will be all back to normal Emma mode by Monday. Well...later people! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4037035/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4037035/ Fri, 10 Dec 2004 17:50:39 PST Before that...I told my dad about Tim.......but not how we met. Needless to say...he wont talk to me now. I don't know whta I did wrong!!! I'm so upset! There's nothing wrong w/ anything I told him and he says he has to "broode" Well...I kept asking him if he was mad at me and he wouldnt respond. Then I got mad and said I did nothing wrong...well...he says "I know" so what did I do? What happened? GAHHH *sobs*
So..now things are uncomfortable and I dont even want to leave the room. Daddy had a christmas paraty tonight, and after we got home..he didn't even go!!!
What have I done?!
Nothing EVER works out for me..I'm so tired of it all. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4029764/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4029764/ Thu, 09 Dec 2004 18:36:16 PST
Also, Tim obviously went to class and didn't inform me. I tried calling him 40 minutes before class and his phone was off. Then I got on the phone w/ my sis and I couldn't call him. You think he could have at least informed me...damnit...this is not a good night.
I have a horrid headache on top of it all. I'm going to bed all, goodnight. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4027508/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4027508/ Thu, 09 Dec 2004 13:56:59 PST Mood: Bleh...sick and in pain

Well...today everybody said I looked much better. My nose wasn't as stuffed up. But...my ears are still stopped up, and I now have a cough that won't go away. On top of the still being sick...I currently have a headache. So..I think after what little homework I have...I'll be going to sleep.

Today, I called Tim around 12:30...actually before that time. He was STILL AWAKE!!! and it was 10 in the morning his time!! He's so crazy...he needs to get a better sleephabit. But anyway, when I called him, Meagan also talked to him, then Ben, then Brian. hehehe...it was funny. Meagan really seemed to like him...and his voice. She really wants to meet him, which is a good thing. I certainly want my friends to like my lovely Tim!!!
Let's see...back to the countdown...18 days until Tim comes, or thereabouts!!!!!

Must go pick up Will from Boy Scouts. Later peoples! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4020818/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4020818/ Wed, 08 Dec 2004 16:40:44 PST
I just almost choked on the snot/mucous running down the back of my throat, dead serious. And tiffany laughed at me about it haha it is kinda humerous.
ANYWAY, gotta go eat...be back later. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4020697/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4020697/ Wed, 08 Dec 2004 16:26:58 PST Oh well, you all can just deal with it. I'm gonna be like Emily Dickenson and have the first line of my poem be the title...take that BITCH!

Well...I'm still sick. I woke up this morning w/ my left ear stopped up, I could hardly hear. Then Dr. Rhodes made fun of me, but got serious and told me to go to the doctor. Then, my right ear got stopped up...I was miserable.
During 4th nothing funny was happening, but I kept laughing at the stupidest things...which made Beyin laugh at me. Oh well...at least we all got a good laugh.
Then mommy checked me out in the middle of 5th!! YAY, I came home...layed down...did homework...got online...did more homework...and fell asleep. I'm awake again though b/c supper is soon, but after my little hour nap...I almost feel worse. BLEARGH!! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4011584/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4011584/ Tue, 07 Dec 2004 14:09:21 PST Music: Josh Groban-Believe, and the sound of my sneezes.


I cannot seem to stop sneezing. Ugh, I feel so horrid. My eyes are watering, my nose is running and I'm sneezing, my throat hurts and feels horridly funny, and I am really flushed.
After school Dr. Rhodes told me to go home, feel better, and to not get near him. hehehe, I love him. Tomorrow after school I am going to talk to him about my essay for the UAB Honors Program. Yep Yep.

IT'S INSANE!! It is 74 degrees outside! It was hot all day. This morning it was storming and the prediction was that there'd be lots and lots of tornadoes, but...none yet and it's not even raining! It's all sunny and blue skyed outside, it's so lovely. I like this weather!

Tim comes in...20 days...or therabouts. The countdown begins now!! Woot Woot *dances around in all my sickness*
Also, my mom talked to Alfa insurance and they said that we turn in two estimates and they will write me a check for the amount and just give it to me!!!! That'll be...possibly close to 4,000 dollars...or less, but still!!!

Oh yes and today I had my interview at Food Outlet. She just hired 3 ppl, but she said she doesn't always keep all 3 and she said she would call me if she had an hours to give me. Then she said if I hadn't heard from her in a couple weeks to call her and maybe I'll have a job by the 1st of the year! So...I rather like a job around the 1st better than now, but I'll take almost anything.
So...methinks that's it. Later People! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4004546/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/4004546/ Mon, 06 Dec 2004 16:14:44 PST Current Mood: very depressed

Well...I am happy...happier than I have been. Yet, almost everyday I cry about something...usually I have good reason...but still, something's not right there. I'm sitting here crying now, over something that most people would find ridiculous, but it's so important to me!! *sigh* I dunno...it's always something, always something bringing me down. I don't know why I can't seem to grasp happiness for a prolonged amount of time. I don't know why I must doubt so much...grrr...

Tomorrow Tiffany and Heather will be back at school!! I missed them more than anything in the world. I really didn't miss anybody else though, and I don't want everybody else to come back to school, things were...peaceful. Our group, what was left, Meagan, Hunter, Jason, and I got along perfectly. it's so amazing!


Jupiter Sunrise, Steal Me:
Sleep in the grass in a blue field
The fireflies blinking past Orion
All sprawled out beside the bikes, the wheels still spinnin'.

I know a shortcut along the stonewall where
Evergreen soldiers point their branches for a child-like mind, like yours and mine to follow.

C'mon, Steal me
C'mon Steal me

I drew a map so we can get home or maybe come back here in the summer.
But I'm not sure how to draw a path to get to moonlight.

So, tonight, these stars can shine as our halos and the pine trees watch over like guardian angels,
protecting a perfect love between twilight and all of a lifetime of yearning.
I wont be awake for much longer
So c'mon, steal me. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3993260/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3993260/ Sun, 05 Dec 2004 07:58:58 PST So, fill it out...PLEASE!!!
(A) First, recommend to me:
1. a movie:
2. a book:
3. a musical artist, song, or album:

(B) ask me three questions, no more, no less. Ask me anything you want. But try & make it scandalous!

(C) go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends to ask you anything... if you want.

My parents woke up this morning, showered and went to Cracker Barrel. They kindly woke will and I up as they were leaving. Pissed me off b/c I wanted food too! Oh well, we showed them, we went to Burger King for Breakfast.
Also, interesting commercial I saw this morning. They're having a video game awards thing on Spike TV...hmmm maybe it'll be good, maybe it'll suck.
Anyway, I think that's about it for now. Later ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3990746/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3990746/ Sat, 04 Dec 2004 21:19:27 PST
I rented the Stepford Wives and the Whole Twelve Yards.
I have only watched the Stepford Wives. FREAKY MOVIE, at first I hated it and it weirded out/scared me, but then the end was actually good! There is hope after all!
Tomorrow I shall watch the other movie

Also, tomorrow we're putting up Christmas Decorations! WOOT WOOT, I cannot wait. I don't think I've ever been this excited about the Holiday's andChristmas! It will be so good and I'm so happy this year!
Well, that's all for now ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3980543/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3980543/ Fri, 03 Dec 2004 14:33:43 PST
Today was Friday, so that means I have a WHOLE weekend ahead! Tonight I'm going to a "ladies tea" with my mother at my grandmother's church. There's food involved...I couldn't resist!!! hahah
Then tomorrow Meagan and I are going shopping at the mall for "our angel from the angel tree". It's part of Key Club and we all got an angel and it has presents that needy kids want and we buy them so they'll have Christmas. We're going to get those items...along with shopping and seeing a movie. hahaha, we're milking it! I'm also sure some DDR will be involved.

Anywho, I guess that's about it. The Band at school is in NYC, obviously, I didn't go. I've already been, figured I wouldn't spend 750 dollars to see something I've seen before. Plus, I'm paying off that Europe Trip.
Later Guys! ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3975438/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3975438/ Thu, 02 Dec 2004 19:41:38 PST I flipped and went into fangirl mode. I love Josh Groban so much and I heard a song and almost started crying. Will said I looked like I was about to cry. I seriously was. Nobody's music has EVER touched me like that. I was floating on a cloud.
Then...I read something...I shouldn't have read it, should have known. NO, I never thought it'd be that. I almost died. I did start crying and still am crying. I went from being so happy and now I feel so low. But you know, have you ever been w/ somebody and you simply KNOW that you aren't meant to be together? Maybe you like them and even care deeply about them, but you know for certain that it's not meant to be. That you two don't connect and mesh in that way that the person you are meant to be with will connect and be perfect foils of each other. You just know and that thought bugs at you and eats at you until you take action.... There's my reasoning, for all the world to see, to try and understand. I can't take back anything I've done in the past, but I sure can change my future if I know things arent going in the right direction. I, as a person, have a right to that...and nobody will ever take that away from me.
I'm gonna finish watching Josh Groban. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3972759/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3972759/ Thu, 02 Dec 2004 14:07:08 PST
Anyway, on to more exciting things. I got my package!!!!! Nobody, but one, will understand that. I was sooo happy and sooo excited and everything in it was sooo wonderful. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3931063/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3931063/ Sat, 27 Nov 2004 11:05:39 PST Also, Rammstein has a new CD out! called "reise, reise" which means "travels, travels" yep yep, quite awesome so far of what I've heard. "loves german"

Anyway, My sister and I are going to see After the Sunset today and to the galleria again. It'll be my second time this weekend. OH well, like I care cause daddy gave me 20 dollars. mWAHAHAHAHA. Also, seester's friend Susie might be coming with us...she's uber nice and such so I'll have a good time.
That's about it. I started a poem this morning, so it should be up by tonight or tomorrow at the latest. ]]> ~sizzlysatine http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3916100/ http://sizzlysatine.deviantart.com/journal/3916100/ Thu, 25 Nov 2004 10:35:02 PST Not much has happened...I got 150 pageviews. WOOT.
I finally submitted more poetry...hopefully there will be more where those came from.
I get to go to my daddy's today, after eating at my grandmothers. Yay for daddy.
I love Tim sooo much, I cannot wait for Christmas when he gets to come and visit. I wish he was here right now.
Well, must go get ready. bye bye ]]> ~sizzlysatine