http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:steelxcorpsez&section=today deviantART RSS for by:steelxcorpsez en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sun, 06 Dec 2009 17:09:14 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/24520448/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/24520448/ Thu, 30 Apr 2009 19:25:39 PDT
There is a concert celebrating something, I don't know what it is exactly. I am patrolling the backstage area and find a group of kids hanging out and discover a stage above the stage. There's a curtain to bring in so I do and then set the kids up and fly in something else. It breaks. I am told to fix it. Between each dream I am back on that upper stage trying to fix it.


3 elderly looking couples take the stage, they are looking confused as the speakers overhead are giving descriptions of events. There's only one I can semi clearly recall and its a story of a couples youth. A projection screen flies in and the lights go to blue as we focus our attention on the screen that is more stage left than normal. It is much like a fairy tale and begins with a lovely, tall, curvy dark haired woman walking around in circles. There is little sound but you hear many young men talking about how they would love a woman like that on their arm. The young men are dressed up as sharp as one would expect one from the 1950s to look. They all just mutter to themselves about how lovely and beautiful she is, and one speaks a little louder than the rest "I am going to marry her" and next to him is a shorter woman with big glasses and ragged grey hair says "I must kill her". The projection fades out and a new one fades in with a new video showing a short time later and the couple was married and the two looked happier than and two people couple be. They are helping the town with many problems and they are making too much money. The woman however is aloof and very distance all the time, she is like a shell with a piece of a person left inside and the rest died long ago. They are seen walking on the top of a tall building and the other women with the ratted hair is standing in the road talking to herself saying, "I made her that beauty, she has to die, she is nothing and would have been less than nothing without me". Fades out and fades back in with a blurry scene that I can't quite recall except that the woman with the ratted hair is talking to the man saying, "You must let her die. you can not save her. She can not stay living" There is no reaction from the man. Fade to a very tall tower, dark clouds against a purple sky, the beautiful woman is lying on the edge of the tower, a piece of which is detached and floating less than a foot away, her head and chest and arms lying on it. She asks her husband "what if I fall from here?" the man is silent "you are going to have to let me die" he struggles with what to respond. The piece holding her head and arms has floated away and now from the torso up is upside-down against the side of the tower. she falls and grabs a window that is just a hollowed out piece of the tower. He is floating next to her and supporting her waist. He is hearing the lovely womans voice, "you have to let me die" she falls slowly and grabs the next window, it is small and heart shaped. The way she is falling does not give anyone the impression of falling, more like floating heavily. she grabs at another window before she gives up and falls into the nothingness below. lights black out and only the back half of the theatre is cheering and crying. They are all older people and the younger kids in the front are reactionless.


Afterwards I see a friend of mine crying over the scene on stage and there are people selling inexpensive pizzas outside. I am impressed and I buy one. We are walking to an outside parking lot and the surroundings cut to the inside of someones pretty little house. There's blood on the walls and a man is running around and freaking out inside trying to find any indication of who it was. There two steps down that leads to a den where there is a girl dressed in an alice in wonderland dress lying on the floor crying and convulsing. She is talking and choking for air, "Bleed more, everyone loves a bleeder". She gets up and runs into an open room and slams the door and I wake up.

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/18533910/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/18533910/ Wed, 11 Jun 2008 20:12:37 PDT




Give his account a look if you could, its simply great and he and I would greatly appreciate it.


<3

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/18400088/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/18400088/ Mon, 19 May 2008 14:10:24 PDT
But that's okay.

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/18265167/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/18265167/ Sat, 10 May 2008 23:00:10 PDT
But then theres some stuff that's gonna be awesome soon
-Taking math and english now will help me later
-Taking psychology next year is gonna be awesome
-Taking graphic design and photography and tech next year are gonna be awesome
-I'm OVER the both of you
-Jordan's gonna come back [I just know he will]
-Ernons teaching me how to draw!


I know what I want to do with my life and the people I would work with are just great.


I need someone to help me make a CCS Journal that looks nice. My Dreamweaver won't open and I want a pretty journal!

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/18107071/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/18107071/ Wed, 30 Apr 2008 18:35:03 PDT that's okay.




btw you are epic fail.



























if you have facebook, you should go to [link]
and vote for ninas jellyfish. its a cute design and it deserves to win. vote as much as possible!

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/17919470/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/17919470/ Fri, 18 Apr 2008 21:55:24 PDT My Adonis is ill and I am without contact.
My brain is starting to hurt on the right side behind my eye.
David Foster Wallace dragged me through every emotion and left the story ending with half a sentence.

I feel like I am forgotten and ignored. In a less dramatic sense of course, because it's not like it's the end of the world or anything, it's just lonely.

My dreams have become increasingly vivid and include past dream people that have not been in my subconscious for a long time. They make me feel not so alone and very sexually frustrated when I wake up. The dreams don't always involve sex, actually rarely do they, but more like inspiring. But I tend to associate happiness/inspiration feelings to the horny feelings. Which is frustrating but the same time gives me enough energy to keep practicing and stuff.

Distance is very frustrating.

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/17733853/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/17733853/ Mon, 07 Apr 2008 15:18:51 PDT




People you should check out





]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/17597020/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/17597020/ Sun, 30 Mar 2008 20:39:27 PDT Thing are starting to work out



David Foster Wallace is a great writer, you should read books by him^^
he writes a decent sex scene, and he's actually an intelligent writer [which is a plus!]













So yeah, how about that for a Journal entry?

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16808514/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16808514/ Sat, 09 Feb 2008 22:39:37 PST














In the meantime, someone tell me a sickly romantic love story.

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16745683/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16745683/ Tue, 05 Feb 2008 20:22:43 PST
My birthday is on friday.
Jordan comes back on thursday.
ALLIE CAME BACK TO SCHOOL!.

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16609593/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16609593/ Mon, 28 Jan 2008 09:04:22 PST
My birthday is soon!!!!!
next Friday Melissa will be turning 17!

Jordan's coming back for a few days so imma be incognito for awhile.

Happiness ensues for the time being^^


















Haha, I'm funny

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16512301/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16512301/ Mon, 21 Jan 2008 19:54:57 PST
It's okay though, I got some truth so it'll be fine...

right?

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16399902/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/16399902/ Mon, 14 Jan 2008 09:00:42 PST
I need to know what about me drives people to become far away. Some of my closest friends are people I have yet to come in contact with in real life. The man who treated me like a queen is 5000 miles away wondering how it went wrong. And new to this list, which is shortened a lot because I don't want to get too repetitive, is that lovely line "I'm coming back, don't be sad"

Do you know what "I'm coming back" means?

It does not mean that "by the way im moving back in with my parents and I'm only coming back for a couple days for your birthday just so you wont cry on my shirt"

Usually when you tell people, like the girl you told you care about, that you're only going to be gone for a month or so, it means that you're not moving away and only coming back for visits. I can't beleive you did that and I can't beleive you have the nerve to call me and tell me about how you're having the time of you life with all your friends and your family, which I don't even mind. But then when I mention that I can not do anything or leave my own house because you're not here you almost immediately tell me that you'll call me back "in a few minutes" and then proceed to not remember to call me back until I call you back at least a day later.

No, I am not fine.


I don't know yet if I am going to be able to handle distance again. It's ruined me before and I don't know if im worth enough to you that I should risk my mind again.

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/14068125/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/14068125/ Tue, 07 Aug 2007 23:49:33 PDT Joy-_-



and Stock rules [which btw you should use]
~use it!!! [itll make me a happy melissa]
~credit me
~link me the result
~I really dont care if its on dA or not, I just want to see the finished project


~~~
I'm sick when I can't stay in at least the bare minimum of contact with you, so whenever you're ready, we should talk..
~~~


If anyone has the cure for forgetting everything in your world midsentence, note me

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/14020315/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/14020315/ Sat, 04 Aug 2007 20:25:45 PDT


~things with Bruno are semi alright
~all my best friends are happy with life[ish]
~people at my job like me
~ME AND MARISSA ARE OKAY!
~boyfriend that treats me so good i almost cant beleive it, starting to lower the pedestal and its great




I love you all
<3

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13788415/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13788415/ Wed, 18 Jul 2007 22:46:20 PDT When everything I remembered held true.
The joy inside was overwhelming.
Beautiful, pristine, charismatic, slightly obscene.

I just know that when I see you..
You'll be judging me, and me, you.
I'm scared at the thought but I know if we try.
We'll be just fine."

~~

part of somethign Josh wrote after I explained my thoughts
hes very good at that...

Yeah, seeing you smile makes me feel like everything has light, it like, brightens my life. and thats good^^

~~

"Do you forgive me yet?" "No, I don't think so" "Well that's okay. I dont care"

~~

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13740808/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13740808/ Sun, 15 Jul 2007 05:17:16 PDT
It kinda worked, ish

I really miss stuff
like
school
and having things work
and stuff
-_-

but at least things are okay now

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13721455/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13721455/ Fri, 13 Jul 2007 13:50:36 PDT

IM HAPPYYYYY


[Hello Happiness, I'm Melissa, I think I might finally deserve you now<3]

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13640556/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13640556/ Fri, 06 Jul 2007 22:54:35 PDT
have someone who wants to talk to me
accomplished something to be proud of on photoshop
am getting a job


HUZZAH!!!

]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13621547/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13621547/ Thu, 05 Jul 2007 13:16:34 PDT
I start to get stable and it goes upside down again

this just, it doesn't make any SENSE. ]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13582261/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13582261/ Mon, 02 Jul 2007 18:35:08 PDT -Modest Mouse
-50s Music

~Talking to Josh
~Talking to Ernon
~Talking to Danny

=hanging out with Jamie

i love my family<3

sooo done with girls for awhile
long while
><

Contentedness ]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13571198/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13571198/ Sun, 01 Jul 2007 23:45:47 PDT Hey Melissa.. umm.. I dont think this is going to work... I didnt want to hurt you, but the more I think about it, the more my gut tells me it's not right..
you havent done anything wrong but I wont make you as happy as you should be. I don't talk to you at all, and when I do it's the same thing so
I think that it would be best if we didnt talk for a while, I need a weeKs or two. ]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13566641/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13566641/ Sun, 01 Jul 2007 16:50:03 PDT
mmm, some commercials just impress me like no tomorrah^^ ]]> *steelxcorpsez http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13519102/ http://steelxcorpsez.deviantart.com/journal/13519102/ Wed, 27 Jun 2007 23:48:28 PDT
I thought I almost my ability to orgasm over music
^^
luckily.....
i didnt
<3

]]> *steelxcorpsez