http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:talon-morgenstern&section=today deviantART RSS for by:talon-morgenstern en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Fri, 18 Dec 2009 04:30:07 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9189246/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9189246/ Mon, 26 Jun 2006 12:31:13 PDT
My hair is irretrivably soaked from shuffling round Brighton in the pissing rain with Dani and Danni looking for a present for my mum. It was her birthday today and I forgot until yesterday when we went out to dinner with her parents and they asked her if Dave was coming down for her birthday. I'm a bad daughter. :< We decided to give up and go home and just have me draw her something and make a card, but on the way the rain eased up so we scooted off into Worthing and grabbed some chocolate from Thorntons for her. Then it rained again, so we did the logical thing. We sought shelter in that beacon of hope and joy for the bored, wet, cold and broke waifs and strays of Worthing: Steve's house.

Steve's mum is hardcore. She slapped a wrestler for being mean to Steve. It was a fantastic moment. Then everyone sat on Steve and Emmy's bed and threw chewits at Dani and I laughed so in retaliation he pushed me off the bed. I don't think he actually meant to push me off but I was perched on the edge and sort of wobbled off with a small prod. Then everyone got bored of abusing Dani and started tormenting Ads about watching Dani's gay home video porn.

And that's what I'd define as an average normal day off school, yes. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9169607/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9169607/ Sat, 24 Jun 2006 13:53:55 PDT
You're pathetic.

I could have lived with it if you'd told me straight away, you know. I could have understood. I could have handled it. But you had to lie. You had to abuse my trust and my friendship, after I poured my heart out to you, I told you my secrets, I trusted you, I thought you were wonderful. I really did. I thought you were the best person I ever met. I didn't judge you for being nineteen years old with a baby when everyone else said I was crazy to think that was no problem. I just wanted to make you happy, I loved being in your company and I wanted to return the favour. I spent well over fifty quid in a month on credit just so I could text you because I couldn't see you face to face and I wanted to talk to you 24/7. I had the best conversations of my life with you. I had that supposedly magical moment, the first awkward, stupid, inept teenage kiss with you. I sorted this whole mess out on a fucking patch of grass opposite a gay pub after school one Monday. I told you I'd wait for you after you'd waited for her, I asked you if that was what you wanted. And you said yes.

And that was a lie.

And I HATE YOU. I hate you, Dani. I hate you because you lied to me and because you just charm everyone somehow and I can't be angry with you because I fell for it, even though you're immature, and you have no concept of money management, and you must have some kind of ADHD, and you have greasy hair and bad teeth and actually, you are just fucking wierd looking, and rude, and you don't think about how what you do makes other people feel, and you've slept around, and you lie. I really hate you. I wish I'd never met you. I hate you so much I can't think of a way to type it. I want to punch you. I want to scream at you and hit you and tell you you're a liar and a bastard and I wish you were dead.

But tomorrow you'll sober up and you'll call me and tell me you're sorry, and you're guilty, and you know you're a horrible person and you feel like a bastard and you hate yourself for what you've done. And you'll tell me you want a hug. And after ten minutes I'll adore you again. And I'll see you on Monday and I'll give you a hug. And we'll sit on Brighton beach and talk about school and work and little Faith, God bless that little girl. And we'll be friends again, although it will hurt for a long time knowing that's all we'll ever be. But I'll get over that. Life goes on. And quickly we'll forget I wanted you and you lied to me and I hated you, like kids always do when they shout at each other in the playground over boyfriends and girlfriends and best friends.

I'll cry a little and you can teach me to throw pebbles at the sea again and you'll make me laugh like you always do when I'm upset. Maybe we'll buy some sweets from that shop in the Lanes. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9065141/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9065141/ Wed, 14 Jun 2006 09:50:48 PDT

lol, bomb scares. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9037741/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9037741/ Sun, 11 Jun 2006 14:17:56 PDT
Whatever you think you're playing at you better come clean tomorrow. If you think I'm going to take you back you better work a fucking miracle. I'm not even sure I WANT you back not matter WHAT you do. I'm not sure you're worth the pain you've bought upon me and her tonight. In fact right now I'm more leaning towards 'I never want to see you again and neither does she with good fucking reason.'

The truth will out, boy. The truth WILL out. 3:45 PM. You better show. You better have a fucking good excuse and a lot of apologies. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9035984/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/9035984/ Sun, 11 Jun 2006 10:46:25 PDT
And also, HEE HEE. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8926650/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8926650/ Wed, 31 May 2006 03:21:26 PDT Now I just have to stop my mother from reminding me that this isn't an excuse for me to think I can go off and have sex with everyone now. I assure you, I didn't think it was to start with.

Dad's off to Turkey with JAYYYYYYYYNE on Friday. God I hate that woman, but this leaves me his house for Saturday and Sunday. This makes for fun.

I never ever want to hear Mr Macdonald-Bowyer say 'alright' to me again. I just don't.

Wrestling and sherbert tubes and Littlehampton and electrical tape, oh dear. Chicken fried rice on Brighton pier with the tramps? Answer phone messages? I love the weekend. Apart from getting Goatse'd and Tubgirled by Alke and Emma DIE FOR THAT BOTH OF YOU. If you don't know what I'm talking about FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT GOOGLE IT. EVER.

I probably have some vitaly important schoolwork to do soon. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8853090/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8853090/ Tue, 23 May 2006 09:39:54 PDT
Me = THE WIN! ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8844432/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8844432/ Mon, 22 May 2006 12:20:25 PDT
That bitch had it coming. I win! I win against Clark-Lyons with pure unleashed shouty hatred and blatant rudeness. I can't belive I got away with sassing a member of staff that badly, especially her! I think her voice wobbled! If I made her cry I am going to be so, so proud of myself. I was powering purely on adrenaline, I swear I was shaking like hell after but god, did I get congratulations afterwards! I don't think anyone in our year has ever been so fucking RUDE to her, much less got away with it, but this time I was just pumped from the mad weekend and wanted to just stand up and lash out at her hypocrisy and dicatorship and verbal abuse and incompeteance, so I let rip. The way she treats her classes is abysmal and from now I'm not making any secret of the contempt I have for her, and I told her so myself. She's a disgrace to the teaching profession.

I can't believe I got as shouty as I did, though. Really, I have never pushed my luck that far before, not even with the real pushovers. More unbelieveable is that I think I've got away with it! No letter home! No detention! No nothing! Being my luck I'll probably get it all tomorrow when she's thought it over but hey, you do the crime you do the time. Right now I'm just liking being asked to tell the story by everyone. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8834975/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8834975/ Sun, 21 May 2006 12:31:05 PDT I love Brighton. I love gigs. I love Augie and his kiddies, I love scooping, I love air guitar, I love cookies, I love Taccus and Rag Freak, I love I NEED A FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAG, I love pepperami, I love Augie's lager, I love car boots, I love knowing that shitty people are geting beaten up tomorrow and I love pay phones in Churchill Square.

Now all I have to do is do a whole piece of coursework by Thursday ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8807017/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8807017/ Thu, 18 May 2006 11:32:25 PDT
He looks like some freaky post-rehab hobo man who's trying to look like a normal member of society. For a moment I wasn't sure if it was my dad or not. That beard's demise is a loss for the civilised world. I hope to god he grows it back soon, because he's going to Turkey soon and without it he won't be able to use his passport. THAT'S how scary and wrong and no it looks.

Last time he did that I was six months old and I took one look and cried. Fourteen years later it's still that scary.

No, this entry contains no other information. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8749863/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8749863/ Fri, 12 May 2006 13:19:05 PDT
Today was a good day though- 31 out of 50 on my German listening test, and... FULL MARKS on the two eight-mark questions I had to do for Religious Studies! So put that in yer crackpipe and smoke it, Mrs "Single-Parent-Mothers-Have-Scummy-Retarded-Children-That-Go-To-Hell-And-You'll-Never-Do-Antything-Good-Amber" Clark-Lyons! So, yes. Feeling quite sucessful against the odds of late. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8698272/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8698272/ Sun, 07 May 2006 07:57:07 PDT ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8520951/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8520951/ Wed, 19 Apr 2006 12:58:37 PDT
What are you doing in my house?

Apologies for my innatentivity of late (Is that even a fucking word?). I've been chasing small children out of my bedroom, defrosting freezers etc. Movement will take place soon, I swear. Once I finish something artistic/scan some photos. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8393641/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8393641/ Fri, 07 Apr 2006 04:33:50 PDT It was wonderful. It always is. Pictures will grace your Devwatch shortly, when I can be arsed to get them developed. I now own loads and loads of touristy shit, including a mini Trabi car (LOVE), a mini Reichstag, and, erm, a WW2 Russian tank commander's hat. Which was sold to me by a strange man of Turkish descent on a bridge, somewhere in East Berlin. You know love it.

Am still tired as hell right now, my feet ache like mad from traversing every side street, high street and back alley in the city.

And the bus journey went horribly, horribly wrong in the best way imaginable, and we got stuck in a hailstorm on the Kurfurstendamm. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8313909/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8313909/ Thu, 30 Mar 2006 12:03:00 PST

Toodles, y'aaaaaaaaawlllll. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8303818/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8303818/ Wed, 29 Mar 2006 11:00:40 PST

Friday is SEXY FLEXIDAAAAAAAAY, a whole day dedicated to Art class, which involves making clay fish, dancing and Mrs Harrison's unholy obsession with bits of frozen sea life.

Now I am going to eat a toasted sandwich and giggle over the word 'offal', for no reason other than it is so, so funny. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8283681/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8283681/ Mon, 27 Mar 2006 11:04:09 PST ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8283674/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8283674/ Mon, 27 Mar 2006 11:03:35 PST
4 DAYS UNTIL THE HOLIDAYS! 6 DAYS UNTIL BERLIN! Dance with me. All of you.

(Meat! Meeeeeeeeeeat!) ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8262138/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8262138/ Sat, 25 Mar 2006 06:14:34 PST
I witnessed the most awesome thing the other day. Jess heaved a meat sandwich at Emma and Amy, and it broke open. Amy grabbed the big slab of meat, screamed "At last, all my dreams have come true!" and put it over her face. Then Emma took pictures and we hid some of it in this tea trolley that someone left in the hall. And after school I found a big black chain on the floor so I took it.

Weeeell, it was just lying around going to waste.

We managed to traumatise Sophie the vegetarian with the meat fight.
"I'm going to have nightmares about people with face smade of meat!"
"Sophie... our faces ARE made of meat."
"OH MY GOD MY FACE!"

]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8244533/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8244533/ Thu, 23 Mar 2006 09:39:06 PST
Day off tomorrow (and a choir of angels descends and sings the halleluja chorus). I was going to revel in pure inactivity all day but I have Maths, Art and Chemistry to do for Monday and Tuesday so fuck that. AND guess what- I have a mock Religious Studies exam on Monday! The real thing will be in May, I think, and will account for 50% of my GCSE score. I'm going to fail it so very very badly, which I have been promised will mean a punishment of as yet undecided severity and a 'good talk' about wether I should be in the class or not. It's okay, though- according to last week's lesson, I'm not going to learn right from wrong and will always be slightly below the academic and mental par because my dad doesn't live with my mother any more, so Mrs Clark can be comforted by the fact that I've been nominated by the Christian contingent of the class as 'most likely to go to hell and burn for my many dirty sins.'

What else... can't stop listening to my two new albums, Meds by Placebo and Termination Bliss by Deathstars. Keep drawing but never seem to find the time to finish anything. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8215147/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8215147/ Mon, 20 Mar 2006 09:23:27 PST
Yeah, when I can be arsed I'll write more. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8178311/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8178311/ Thu, 16 Mar 2006 12:46:01 PST Dave had his annual cancer check-up today and got the all clear for the third year running. He only has two more years to go before they give him the permenant all-clear.

I'm so up to date on my work it scares me. I've been feeling really good lately. More healthy, more happy. Sleeping better. Thinking clearer. Been better tempered, better at talking to people, not so worried about what they'll think about me.

THIS WEEKEEEEEND D:
I will be at Dad's. I need to-
Buy a load of Mother's Day stuff
Buy Termination Bliss and make Dad order me Synthetic Generation
Buy Meds (Placebo is love)
Make plans for a big canvass I want on one wall of my bedroom at Mum's
Buy useless shit for Berlin! 17 days to go, woo yeah! Seriously can't wait.

A whole day of DT tomorrow. I pity poor Mr Boswell. We're goign to make Emma paste a note to his door saying "I HEART CARL BOZ." We do, you know. We really do. Even though I nearly set his workbench on fire.

Now, however I have to go draw random shit and see a man about a techno-box. Or rather, I have to laugh about Emma and AlkeSophie seeing Augie about a drum machine.

I'm so sure I've forgotten something. D: ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8148709/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8148709/ Mon, 13 Mar 2006 11:44:53 PST I'm super-creative right now, it's just finding the time to transfer things from notes to finished piece that's hard. On the upside I only have my DT to do for homework, we get the Friday after next off, and there's only 20 days until Berlin!

I get to spend Wednesday night at Dad's again as Mum is going to see Dave. Dave has his yearly post-cancer checkup on Thursday, I hope everything goes okay.

RS is funny. Marriage and Divorce topics. ZOMG if you have teh sexx0rs with anyone other than your husband, you get AIDS and die and THEN you go to hell. D: We get to learn about abortion next week. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8137994/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8137994/ Sun, 12 Mar 2006 09:42:46 PST AND I forgot to get new headphones (mine are broken) AND none of the stores that do credit for my phone were open.

Now, though- a tie for Link of the Week:
[link] FOR THE WIN. Really.
And...
[link] Say hello to ANDREAS. He's from Stockholm, Sweden. He's the frontman of Deathstars and he likes my work and he's lovely. 'Nuff said. And thanks to Mrs FUCKING Huntcunt's double-sheet of math work, I missed him on MSN by about eight minutes, which is crap because I have new stuff to show him.
I've done all my English essay, all my Math work, all my History, made a start on my Art and still need to do my DT... -__- ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8128039/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8128039/ Sat, 11 Mar 2006 06:11:26 PST
Now, something I got in a junk-mail that I actually really liked:
The five-song questionairre.

1) List five songs that make you happy/want to dance
-Iggy Pop: Lust For Life
-Alanis Morrisette: All I Really Want
-Motorhead: Jailbait
-Deathstars: Synthetic Generation
-Marilyn Manson: I Don't Like The Drugs

2) Five that make you cry
-Rammstein: Stirb Nicht Vor Mir
-Nine Inch Nails: Hurt
-Marilyn Manson: Coma White
-REM: Everybody Hurts
-Metallica- Nothing Else Matters

3) Five and the people they remind you of
-Hell is for Heroes: Slow Song (Andreas)
-Mouldy Peaches: Downloading Porn With Daveo (Megan )
-Green Day: Longview (Bethan )
-Rammstein: Amerika English version (Maddi, Kelly and Sophie)
-Foo Fighters: Learn To Fly (Mum and Dad)

4) Five that inspire you
-Rammstein: Hilf Mir
-Nirvana: Come As You Are
-Rage Against The Machine: Guerilla Radio
-System of a Down: Chop Suey!
-Deathstars: Little Angel

5) Five that you listened to today
-Pink Floyd: When The Tigers Broke Free
-Seether: Remedy
-KreuzDammer: Walking Wounded
-Depeche Mode: Personal Jesus
-The Prodigy: Firestarter

6) Five that have a special meaning and what meaning
-Rammstein: Mein Teil... The song that started it all. A million happy memories.
-Rammstein: Wo Bist Du... Christmas 05. I was missing someone who wasn't there for the first time, and it hurt, no matter what I said about him.
-Deathstars: Cyanide... Again- the one that started it. Late night at Dad's, on my own, and if there's one thing I love it's those damn hats.
-Placebo: Protect Me/Protege Moi... Standing at the bandstand in the rain waiting for a lift home a hundred times on a Saturday afternoon.
- Simply Red: Stars... Reminds me of when we all lived in Durrington, before it got shitty, and before the divorce.

7) Your all-time favourite five
Prone to change, but today in no particular order:
-Deathstars: Cyanide
-Hell is for Heroes: Slow Song
-Placebo: Because I Want You
-Rammstein: Amour
-HIM: In Joy And Sorrow

Now wasn't that fun? ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8112101/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8112101/ Thu, 09 Mar 2006 12:29:56 PST
Like, really, really, REALLY FUCKING HAPPY. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8092259/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8092259/ Tue, 07 Mar 2006 10:24:18 PST

Ahem. It has come to my attention that nothing has really happened since my last journal, apart from the fact that I have bought a HUGE SEXY SKETCHBOOK oh yes and am filling it with pure graphite joy as we speak.

No, this journal serves no purpose other than to be a vehicle for the phrase 'pure graphite joy'.

Oh yeah, I watched Sam try to make out with Grant on a train. It's TRUE what they say about exclusively male-pupilled schools. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8026182/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8026182/ Tue, 28 Feb 2006 09:24:45 PST Really, she's just BEGGING for an arsewhipping when she's got me, Maddi, Jasmine and the two Katies in a class when she's teaching us about why divorcees go to hell. This is even more of an opportunity to anger her by not sharing her views than the whole 'SINGLE PARENT FAMILIES LEECH FROM TEH BENEFIT SYSTEMZ D:<' fiasco was.

33 days until Berlin. Believe me when I say I can hardly wait. I've been dying to be back there ever since, well, about three minutes after I came home from the last visit.

Emma stole my tin foil and make it into a flower. Which Kelly squashed. And thanks, Sam and/or Grant, for nearly shutting my hands in the train doors after trying to anally violate each other in the middle of the carriage.

Now I am going to take neurofen because something in my internal workings has a grudge against me. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8016054/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/8016054/ Mon, 27 Feb 2006 08:35:33 PST

Technically this is journal spam but, hey, I don't really give a shit because I'm going to fail, like, everything except German and Art, and nobody cares about those subjects. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7970078/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7970078/ Wed, 22 Feb 2006 09:35:13 PST
In other news, it is Cold. Not cold, Cold. And all the muscles in my legs have rebelled against... something. Possibly gym class. And are now taking revenge. My foot is actually numb, but that's probably because I'm sitting on it.

But yeah, socks. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7962621/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7962621/ Tue, 21 Feb 2006 13:34:02 PST
I should REALLY do those three A3 sheets of DT work, but right now I'm gonna go get cheese. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7915704/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7915704/ Thu, 16 Feb 2006 12:02:46 PST Yup- we're jetting off on the 3rd April for 3 nights in a four-star bigass hotel in the Alexanderplatz, just on the east side of the river that if my map-reading skills don't fail me, is called the Spree. £150 for two people over three days in a four-star ain't bad, you know. I can't wait to drag my vertigo-ridden dad up the TV tower. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7852183/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7852183/ Fri, 10 Feb 2006 01:18:39 PST
At dad's all weekend, again. He's working all Saturday.

I have three things lined up for this year thus far- Placebo gig, London, April, possibly with Fishy
-Big show in Lonond Hyde Park, Foo Fighters and Motorhead headlining, some time in June
-Berlin in Easter holidays (YES )
Unfortunately, all that together could cost anything up to £1000. Whichw e kind of don't have. Hence Dad working the overtime.

So not much really, other than flu DEATH oh god I'm going back to sleep. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7807633/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7807633/ Sun, 05 Feb 2006 10:02:04 PST
Speaking of music- Anyone (and by anyone I'm looking at Lupie and Raziela ) got any good Rammstein single remixes or any of the various members' old work? I'm talking Feeling B, Orgasm Death Gimmick (love that name ) and so on. I've heard Feeling B are meant to be quite good, although certain First Arsch tracks have been reported to induce ear-bleeding. yousendit.com is the way to go, you know my email. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7787095/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7787095/ Fri, 03 Feb 2006 04:31:33 PST
I want cereal. Specifically, honey nut cornflakes with splashes of milk and a sprinkling of sugar. And when I say want, I mean CRAAAAAAAAAAAAVE. Unfortunately, anything I eat currently has a tendancy to make a wild break for freedom some ten minutes later.

BUT I REALLY WANT CORNFLAKES. Or rather, I really want the cornflakes but I don't feel like eating anything. This is stupid, I know, but have some pity on me, I haven't eaten in over 50 hours. I'm living on milk, apple juice and the odd segment of orange which is just orange juice in a little fibre bag anyway.

I gave into pressure and played with the rest of the clay I got ages ago to kill some time. I was going to make a Morgenstern but it eventually developed into the MGM demon because oh my god does that look fucking awesome or what. He's a bitch to build up in clay though. If those wings fall off once more I'll go mad. I just need to wait until he dries, which takes FOREVER, and then I'll paint him.

So right now I'm watching an advert for Sex Week on This Morning. Daytime TV is so wierd. I think I'll sleep some more. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7776824/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7776824/ Thu, 02 Feb 2006 01:03:35 PST
I'm off school today because my stomach hates me this week and my hormonal system has teamed up with my own menstrual cycle and turned on me. Too much info I know but HEY WHAT YA GONNA DO DON'T FUCK WITH ME.

Go to ~calicokatt for the Mann Gegen Mann video. And don't say I didn't warn you. All I'm saying is... I love the boots. And... the hair. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7750998/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7750998/ Mon, 30 Jan 2006 12:19:19 PST
I am ill. My entire digestive system seems to have imploded and I busted my hand playing fucking VOLLEYBALL in PE. On the upside I did get an A in my German coursework. Which is nice.

My mum's boyfriend Dave keeps accusing me of smoking pot. :/ HE's the one who calls everyone gay and keeps BEES. I mean, wow. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7721339/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7721339/ Fri, 27 Jan 2006 09:06:22 PST She's been suspended. It's going round that she was done for dealing, but I think she'd be thrown right out if she had a stash in school. Either way, I got to spend the last few minutes of the day watching a foul little creature getting her comeuppance and not liking it one bit, and deriving visible smiley and heartwarming feelings of happiness from her abject misery at her punishment. Which was a nice way to start the weekend. Really, if you knew her, you'd know just why I hate her this much. I could watch her being gunned down by a firing squad with joy and I'd kick her dead body as hard as I could when it was done for everything she's done to me and the people I care about and anyone else she's preyed on. I got a real rush of vicious joy to see her knocked off her pedestal in such a hard way. It's your turn to cry, Alex. It's time for you to finally reap all the shit you sow and see how it feels to have hell happen to YOU.

So! Off to dad's for the weekend, although there will be the customary Fish Invasion on Saturday, whee, because I am never one to not take advantage of someone else's offer of food and a house for the evening. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7702426/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7702426/ Wed, 25 Jan 2006 08:30:04 PST

Yeah, not a lot really. Just wanted to vent that. >_> ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7683522/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7683522/ Mon, 23 Jan 2006 09:24:05 PST
Also, me and Fishy managed to mentally damage one of the guys on the train by discussing hysterectomies. After Maddi harrassed Grant about the tragic loss of his emo fringe. See? I do NOTHING in school. It all happens after hours.

Cannabis foot cream. It's the ONLY way to go, man.

In theory I should be doing my English essay, but... no. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7647764/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7647764/ Thu, 19 Jan 2006 11:43:41 PST During which I will be... guess what... WORKING. MY. FAT. TEENAGE. ARSE. OFF. Yeah. Again. And again and again, until I die in a heap of ungraded DT papers.

I played with clay tonight at last. ^^ I made a mini-Omega (no I don't blame you if you don't know what I'm on about), which isn't great but not too bad for a first try. I still need to paint her.

I've been listening to the original Personal Jesus all day long. Beepy distorted noises are love. I needs me some TECHNO. Preferably from the eighties, for maximum cult weirdness vibe.

Today I watched someone get smeared with cheese. It was a life experience. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7637908/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7637908/ Wed, 18 Jan 2006 09:59:34 PST
Why?

Because I've been working constantly since I got back to school. I haven't been able to do anything for myself. I've been working every night, I've been dealing with my mum's problems, I've been trying in vain to show my dad that I exist and I've been living on takeout food since Monday because I have no kitchen, and I've been fielding shit from the chavs, dropouts and the people who don't matter at school.
And all of the above makes me tired and shitty towards the people who do matter.

So tonight, I'm going to go on MSN. I'm going to have a nice long shower, I'm going to do some drawing and some writing, and I'm going to go to bed before two AM.

And if Boswell, Bromfield and Harrison don't like it they can shove it up their collective arse.

And I'm sorry Alex, but I'd rather lick the filth off my bathroom floor than 'suck your tit'. You make me SICK, you WHORE, you and all your little friends. I'd like to wring your scrawny little neck until your ugly mulleted head hangs limply from your broken spine and spinal cord like a slaughtered chicken. And the fucking same goes for Vicky Martin, and all her pinch-faced little minions, and her nasty little rat of a sister. I hope you all get AIDS when you go off and fuck all the local emo-band boysluts whose second names you won't even remember the next day.

A good evening to you all. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7618661/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7618661/ Mon, 16 Jan 2006 09:21:00 PST
*twitch spasm*

Anyway. I have clay! Which I have not yet been able to play with because I'm SHIT BUSY RIGHT NOW with all my work and, y'nkow, my lack of food/a kitchen to cook it in. Small thing that. And my dad is quite possibly the nastiest, stupidest bastard I know.

I do love my MP3 player, though. It's my baby. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7590758/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7590758/ Fri, 13 Jan 2006 08:55:31 PST She's jealous of our hardcore.

What else... WHOLE DAY OF DT ARGH. I have so much work to do this weekend. I'm at my dad's, too I have about three DT sheets to do, two History questions, a still life composition to sketch and some twatty Chemistry sheet. Oh well... Mr Boswell is now traumatised forever by me and Bethan and our random shit. (YOUR MUM AND THE POPE! YOUR MUM AND PAUL! YOUR MUM IN A BOW TIE! YOUR MUM IN CUFFLINKS!) "Half a cabbage... whole cabbage... CABBAGE PATCH!" "Shpadoinkle!" "NAKED MAAAAAAAAAAN" And all that shit. Me and Alke (Sophie) got yelled at for listening to her MP3 in class... we were singing Mein Teil. That song has a special place in my heart for so many reasons. Then Amy taped over Jess's eyes with double sided taped and they went into hysterics and Amy got sent out for the rest of the lesson. At lunch Emma tried to make Kelly steal various things in the hall and started dragging Maddi around the building on her chair. Then I got the hiccups something chronic and I kept making horrible noises while Mr Boswell was talking and he scared me by walking up behind me and breathing on my head. Megan tried to cure me by yelling ANAL at me. It was an awesome day.

Now I am off to my dad's, and I fully intend to kidnap Fishy and make her stay to get rid of the boredom. NO SAYS STEVEN! My dad's a gay bishop! Bumsex! Teach me to bang (like) Christoph! We need lives so bad.

(I apologise for the injoke-ridden journal to everyone who doesn't go to school with me, but... MEEEDIUM DAAAAVE.) ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7572139/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7572139/ Wed, 11 Jan 2006 09:12:42 PST "

The good:
Mum is out tonight. Wahey! Loud music, dancing, crap TV and phone abuse calls.

The bad:
I should really send this time on my German and History coursework and my Chemistry homework.

The ugly:
Messer isn't being delivered until LATE FEBRUARY ARG. Flipping amazon.com have decided they're going to plonk their collective arse down and have cream tea and scones before they get round to doing the post-christmas imports. Suffice to say I am going to be royally pissed if they decide they can't get it after all. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7552178/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7552178/ Mon, 09 Jan 2006 08:51:31 PST
I worked solidly all weekend, you know. I finished all seven bits of homework I had, and I finished all my German coursework. Two hundred words of hopefully fluent German, checked and double checked, sourced from everything from the school textbook to the lyrics booklet from Reise Reise (and thank fuck for Rammstein, because without them my Gemran GCSE would be ROYALLY SCREWED). I'm actually improving on German so much this year. I don't give a shit about RS exams and fucking Chemistry modules, because it's earning the little "well done"s and the "your'e improving quickly"s in my Art and German books that give me purpose. Not filling in a crossword on acids and alkalis. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7543895/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7543895/ Sun, 08 Jan 2006 11:03:44 PST

Because I'm bored, an interesting item from a Rammstein interview I found today:

Has anyone in the band ever been injured onstage?
“Yes, but we like the pain. We used to have explosions on the stage, and Till would kneel right next to them so he could feel the pain. It had an effect on his hearing, but he likes it when it hurts. It doesn’t have to look good as long as it hurts. We’re from Eastern Germany, don’t forget, and we can take worse [than that]. Only the Chechens are tougher than us!
Till can also eat wine glasses, including the stem, but you have to be able to chew properly. There are so many show-offs where we come from. When you’re out in bars, people will give you dirty looks and bite through glasses to start fights. Those guys spit it out, but Till’s thing is to keep eating the whole glass while still staring and swallowing it. Nothing happens if he does that.”

I'm not sure if that's quite cool... or really, really stupid and fucked up. I can't even imagine what kind of havoc those wine glasses are wreaking with his throat and digestive system. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7534345/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7534345/ Sat, 07 Jan 2006 10:03:36 PST
Pissing hell. Onthe other hand, I have discovered that when I really sit down with the intention of getting down to it, I can ramble on about absolutely fuck all in German without needing a dictionary. Oh yeah, I have learnt. I know stuff now. Ha.

What else... I'm getting all my homework done today so I can draw all of tomorrow. Fnarrr. You know what? I want clay. I want to make a little clay Morgenstern. Blame ~Psycho-Claw and her clay-making goodness. Who knows where I can buy good clay round here? Everyone talks about this 'sculpey' stuff but I don't know anything about that. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7515918/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7515918/ Thu, 05 Jan 2006 09:18:20 PST
The rest of the English class got their first draft 'creative writing' coursework marked, graded, and covered in pointers as to how they can improve, what bits don't work etc, to help them gain the A* our teacher wants of us. I couldn't wait to get this done. Creative writing, Art and German are teh only things I can do for toffee in school, so I was hoping she'd be impressed and I'd get a good mark.

But she didn't mark mine. She didn't even read it. She said she hadn't done anything with it because she couldn't read my handwriting. She also lost my media coursework, which my old English teacher told me was the best she'd ever seen, and when I asked her where it was, claimed she never had it and I didn't do it, and told me to stop talking about it because it was irrelevant to the lesson.

If the litte bitch wasn't several months pregnant I'd have heaved a fucking table at her. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7506883/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7506883/ Wed, 04 Jan 2006 09:56:19 PST

On a lighter note, phrase of the day is "tit face knee spoon", which we cam blame entirely on Sophie and Maddi.

And it's the fourth of January, of course. "Twenty-nine years is not an age difference!". He's still younger than you, Mum and Dad. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7487811/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7487811/ Mon, 02 Jan 2006 10:44:46 PST
So with the new year, I bring a pile of new art for your personal disgust, I mean delight. Now, in theory I should be doing the DT coursework that has has to be handed in on Thursday, but... who really gives a shit?

Two big deliveries coming up this month- my fine brand flipping new copy of Messer in all its shiny disturbed poetic glory, and a new kitchen, which isn't half as fun.

So. Here's hoping I get to do as much fun crap this year as I did last one. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7429624/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7429624/ Wed, 28 Dec 2005 03:16:09 PST
Yes, my aunt and uncle were as utterly humourless, straight-laced and disapproving as could be. In one evening they managed to slag off midgets, Germans, Greeks, the French, people with houses with less than four floors, people who let their children eat more than two biscuits per afternoon, people who don't take exactly two minutes to brush their teeth, people who don't win awards at school every year, and people who don't make cakes. And Germans again.

Of course the look on their faces when I explained that the book Mum and Dad had got me for Christmas was a book of exculisively German poetry written by a German whose main job was writing and singing the German-language vocals in a band comprised entirley of Germans was quite a nice Christmas present. Oh yeah. Messer is turning up between the 29th and the 14th. Consider me HAPPY.

So aside from that, much drawing material and CDs were gathered, as well as UNDERWEAR (no Lupie, not quite the Panties of Fate, but close), but its not quite Christmas without a packet of underwear under the tree. Take that as you will. Also, a huge book of mythical beasts in art, containing a PHOTOSHOP GUIDE. At last I shall conquer that bastard program. Right after I've taken back my wanky MP3 player. I think it's got a duff battery and something screwy in the actual machinery. My usual luck, then.

Ha. I love the Christmas message on Rammstein.com. A whole one line. Bless their little hearts, or something. Incedentally, would anyone happen to know if one N. Hutton has an art site on here or another such site? There's some of her work up on rammimages and it's very very good stuff.

EDIT- New MP3 is bought, and currently charging. Hopefully this one will work. And I'm sitting on a COW PRINT BEANBAG my dad and his girlfriend got me. Oh, rock the fuck on.
Incidentaly, if anyone got MVC vouchers, you wanna go spend them now because the entire chain has gone into liquidation and they're not going to be accepting the vouchers for much longer, as in, they might stop accepting them tomorrow. Which is pretty crap. Luckily I spent all mine on a big CD collection Dad wanted, so he now owes me £15. He just doesn't know it yet.

Well, if I've forgotten anything, it's because I'm knackered and can't be bothered to write any more. Ha. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7388707/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7388707/ Fri, 23 Dec 2005 04:06:32 PST
BUT YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT MY WHINGY FAMILY. I digress. We're setting off tomorrow morning at about ten, having an Indian takeaway for a Christmas eve meal and coming back first thing on the 27th. Between that will be screaming, laughing, alcohol, sugar, arguments, and wholesome educational activities. Sam has a little guitar. This might just make for FUN. Mum is now my partner in crime. She's bringing the Lichtspeilhaus and LAB DVDs. I'm bringing the CDs. We are going to rock Topsham hardcore or something.

First, in a few hours me and Mum are heading round to Gran's for lunch and later this evening my dad is coming round to give me the things him and Mum got me as joint presents- my new MP3 player and something else he won't tell me about. I THINK I know what it is, but I can't be sure. If it is what I think it is, you won't see me without it until I've translated it all perfectly and learnt it off by heart.

So! If I don't hear from you before the event, have mad fun, drink and eat too much, wake up on Boxing Day, cry with regret and shame, write out a cheque for the damage to the bar, argue with your relatives and take an aspirin. See you all around. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7353268/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7353268/ Mon, 19 Dec 2005 10:04:10 PST Comment here and...

1. I'll respond with something random about you.

2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.

3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in. (wtf is jello?!)

4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me.

5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.

6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.

7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.

8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal. You MUST. It is written.

Why? Because I'm BORED. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7345765/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7345765/ Sun, 18 Dec 2005 13:21:49 PST
Quite a good show, actually. I was sat behind the four weirdest fans in the whole of Earls' Court- four blokes, abut twentysomething, leaping and screaming and generally really enjoying themselves. Good stuff. And- a no show on the Jayne front! She did in her back the morning before and couldn't come. So what did me and Dad do? We became ticket touts for the evening. No-one bought it. Seating, y'see, high up at the back. Good for me, as I got to see the arena-sized light show (and it was an excellent light show- love the lasers) and all of the stage and the crowd and whatnot, but not for the bigtime fans who turned up to get into standing and into it. So... the injoke with my dad for the next forever is going to be "...anyone want to buy a ticket?" at random moments.

Oxford Street during Christmas shopping = teh no. *death and wheezing* I don't know what it is, but the moment I begin to shop with Christmas in mind, I become enraged. I will swear, take the piss, shove through crowds and get angry and tearful very, very fast. Then when I've bought what I want, and leave the store, it's cheerful smiles all round. Luckily I braved it this weekend and all I needed is now got.

Fishy- BETTER THAN CURLERS! ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7325963/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7325963/ Fri, 16 Dec 2005 08:23:00 PST
no body said it was easy but no one ever said it would be so hard says:
i met a girl down at the disco
no body said it was easy but no one ever said it would be so hard says:
she said hey hey hey hey lets
no body said it was easy but no one ever said it would be so hard says:
MILKY MILKY COCO POPS

Last day HILARITY. Anal probe the squirrel! Beware the wet table! And all kinds of hoo ha and buggery. "I MET A MAN. He is my favourite man here."

Ahaha I'm FREE. And tonight I'm invading Fish'y housing space, woooargh. And then I'm at Dad's all weekend, seeing Foo Fighters in London on Saturday. Then XMAS SHOPPING LIKE THE WOARGH.

Ignore me, I'm off my face. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7317691/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7317691/ Thu, 15 Dec 2005 10:50:35 PST

ONE MORE DAY UNTIL THE HOLIDAYS. ONE MORE DAY. God, why is the week soing so SLOWLY? But we get to leave an hour early tomorrow, yay. Besides, all of tomorrow is an Art flexiday, so I'll be holed up in my little Art room corner with a pot of glue, a line drawing of some vegetables and some tissue paper. Apparently we're meant to be building up the texture of the veggie on the picture so we can paint it just like the real thing or something. I don't know, I was chewing on pencils all lesson today. Frigging lead poisoning.

-STUFF WHAT I NEED TO DO-
-Fishy's present (20% done)
-Lupie's present (90% done)
-Raz's present (20% done)
-Buy Mum something
-Buy Dad something
-Search my dad's house and find out if he ever did order me Messer.
-Finish Teh DT Coursework of Suxx0rs.

Soemone list some 'unwholesome' activities that I can harass my prim and proper aunt with. We've already had masturbating and fishing. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7290442/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7290442/ Mon, 12 Dec 2005 10:08:55 PST
Other than that, not much. German was fun, with Emma and her trouser-dwelling phone. I love German lessons. We always have so much fun, and yet we still get the work done. I feel embarrassed when I have to read bits out though, because I put on the proper accent and everyone else just reads it with an English accent. It's auch, not 'owsh'. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7279284/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7279284/ Sun, 11 Dec 2005 03:09:10 PST
On the other hand I have a christmas tree. It's got blue lights on.

Oh, and I have a sneaking suspicion I'm now sharing the fandom with my mum now. I'm minus my copies of Mutter. Reise Reise, Rosenrot and my LAB DVD. I have a terrible feeling that it might be my fault. Still- that's two of us to drive my dad up the wall, then. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7263568/ http://talon-morgenstern.deviantart.com/journal/7263568/ Fri, 09 Dec 2005 09:43:46 PST We went and hung out in the fitness suite, and had fun on the running machines. As in, three people running on one machine, and Emma sitting down on it at top speed and flying off the end. Oh god, I haven't laughed so hard in ages. And lunch was just as good- pawning off Emma's coke can ("It has been touched by my hand! Rubbed on my nose! Balanced on my head! SOPHIE PUT KIWI FRUIT IN IT! I EVEN LICKED IT! SOMEONE BUY IT!") and the spillage ("I came on the floor! Don't tread in it!").

My mother is walking around muttering 'ooo arr' every time she leans near me. I am terrified.

Only one more week of schooling horror to go and then the christmas hols, with a ding dong merrily on high or something. Me and Mum are buying a tree tomorrow. It's going to be tragic. ]]> ~talon-morgenstern