http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:the-perfect-drug&section=today deviantART RSS for by:the-perfect-drug en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Fri, 18 Dec 2009 08:13:22 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/28743297/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/28743297/ Fri, 04 Dec 2009 09:29:59 PST
Personally, if I had been in his place, I would have jumped out of the car and been babbling things like "Are you ok?" and "Please don't sue me." :/

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/28076267/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/28076267/ Sat, 31 Oct 2009 23:25:55 PDT Unless one of you could help me.
That'd be swell.

(I legitimately bought the serial key for this version, I just need the link to download it.)

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/26674992/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/26674992/ Tue, 18 Aug 2009 15:49:48 PDT

I got a kickass new desktop and I'm SO excited to have a computer that doesn't suck for once. And I ordered myself a new tablet (Intuos3, 4s are too expensive). AH so excited.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/26539299/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/26539299/ Wed, 12 Aug 2009 00:50:49 PDT The last two times my friends and I tried to buy tickets they were sold out in like less than an hour. But we got them!

I cannot WAIT. This is the second best day of my life. The first being when I actually get to see them.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/26369217/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/26369217/ Mon, 03 Aug 2009 21:54:44 PDT
]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/25904624/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/25904624/ Sun, 12 Jul 2009 17:54:18 PDT
I got a new phone in December, however it is an AT&T Quickfire. For those of you who don't know, they were soon nicknamed "Quick ( to catch on) fires". So very soon after I got it, there was a factory recall, and not only do they have a tendency to burst into flames, it's also made quite poorly and freezes and fucks all the time. One of my friends has an iPhone 3G S, and loves it. I just want a phone that's made well and that I can depend on.

I was also finally able to register for classes at NKU. They'll only let me take two classes towards my major (a foundations art class and an art history). So I'm in three gen eds. After this I'll only have two gen eds to take, so they better let me in more art classes in order for me to be a full time student.

I'm also finally getting the deer damage from December (alliteration is fun)on my car fixed this week!

Not much else going on, my life is mostly boring.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/25252827/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/25252827/ Thu, 11 Jun 2009 11:21:07 PDT
At least there's a Clutch concert in Cinci the same night I can go to. That softens the blow a bit.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/24712917/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/24712917/ Mon, 11 May 2009 23:01:59 PDT
Besides that, I've been watching a lot of Star Trek. I love that there's a new movie, so they're showing old reruns on like 10 different channels all the time. Even though my parents are Trekkies and have almost every episode on VHS. Yeah, I'm the spawn of Trekkies. And sadly none of my friends will see the movie with me. I'm the only Star Trek nerd. Sad face.

I'm also OMGSOEXCITED that I'll be getting an apartment with two of my best friends soon. I love that we are all going to the same college now. We found a bitchin townhouse that we can afford. This is amazing because if I have to be stuck in my tiny hometown too much longer living with my parents I'm just gonna go ahead and eat some lead paint.

Now all I need is a job so I can pay rent.

Finally, in one of my Sci Fi channel marathons, I watched the Descent for the first time. I expected a lame modern day horror film full of cheap scares, like something jumping out at a character, then showing it's just a cat. I hate that so much. But I was very pleasantly surprised. It was actually very well made, with a great premise that for once was properly executed. It was consistently suspenseful, and genuinely scary. I haven't been freaked out by a movie since IT. Plus the acting didn't suck, which always helps.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/24593935/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/24593935/ Mon, 04 May 2009 23:32:46 PDT
Let me give you an example of how I've been feeling: I've been too scared to even call or text my BEST friends. I'm afraid they hate me, that they don't want me around. So I've reverted quite a bit. I hate this, I want my old self back. I used to be so happy and outgoing around them.

I don't know how to go about getting back to normal. I want to be my old self again, I'm not happy being this terrified shell of myself.

I don't really care if anyone reads this, it's just one of those times typing out how I feel and getting everything out of my head makes me feel a little better.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/24470870/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/24470870/ Mon, 27 Apr 2009 20:07:35 PDT
I'm glad to have that off my mind.

In other news, I got tattoos on my hips (one in February and the other just a couple weeks ago). I'll put pictures up soon.

Also, I need suggestions of things to do to entertain myself. After losing my job, I've been going CRAZY with boredom. I can't wait to start school again so I can get out of my lame little hometown. It is so dead here.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/23977318/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/23977318/ Mon, 30 Mar 2009 21:52:52 PDT
Oh, and I was going the speed limit the whole time. I told him that and he said "Oh. Well I didn't clock you. It just seemed like you were going fast." WTF. Might want to make sure someone is actually breaking laws before you pull them over.

As for driving "erratically," all I did was get in the right lane to pass someone who was in the left lane going 35 in a 45, and I was obviously doing the speed limit. (And yeah, I used my turn signals and obeyed every fucking traffic law. I knew there was a cop behind me.)

He didn't give me a ticket, but he said "You're a young driver, you don't need to be driving like that." So I should drive ten miles below the speed limit like all the little old ladies that live here? Because I think it's sad when everyone drives so slowly a cop thinks it's dangerous for someone to go the intense speed limit of 45 mph.

So yeah, slow down there Jeff Gordon, at those speeds you never know what might happen.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/23778639/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/23778639/ Thu, 19 Mar 2009 11:30:56 PDT
I am surprised that a used Graphire2 I got off eBay has lasted me four good years. So I guess I'm forced to stick with my oil painting until I can get a new one or this one decides to work again. So yeah. That's all I got.

_________________________
During my time of unemployment I've been spending my time watching NCIS, painting, reading, and discovering some kickass bands.

"Little Boots" and "Natalie Portman's Shaved Head" (yeah, that's right) are simply amazing.

Everyone should listen to "Meddle" by Little Boots and "Sophisticated Side Ponytail" by NPSH.

[link]
Have a listen.

That's pretty much it. Not much else is up with me lately.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/23280283/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/23280283/ Wed, 18 Feb 2009 21:42:21 PST
I'm currently:

1. Losing my job on February 27th due to the economy currently being located in an epic shit storm. (The store where I work is going out of business.)

2. Job hunting.

3. Taking the semester off and visiting schools to decide where I'll go next semester.

4. Getting tattooed. World's best therapy, I love it. I have two, getting the third sometime in next couple weeks.

5. Seeing Avenged Sevenfold in concert next week.

6. Road tripping to New Jersey in May for BAMBOOZLE. I'm SO fucking excited for that.

7. Gettin' by.

8. Realizing that I am, without a doubt, incontestably awesome.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/22359997/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/22359997/ Wed, 07 Jan 2009 23:57:40 PST **Update**

So here it goes. I have recently gone through a horrible breakup. Despite telling myself I'd never let some man reduce me to a groveling wreck, when something like this actually happens, it's a lot harder to deal with than you think it will be. What happened to me is something I never thought I would have to deal with in my lifetime, let alone at the age of 20.

The story is that my ex drank a lot, and admitted to being an alcoholic. Despite about two months of my begging and pleading with him to get help, promising to go with him and stand by him in therapy, support groups etc., he refused to get help. I finally had had enough. I told him that his problem was putting a lot of strain on our relationship and that it was becoming unhealthy for both of us, that I did not want to break up, but just have both of us take some space for a couple weeks. He took it well, obviously wasn't thrilled, but said that he knew we both wanted to be together and that the break wouldn't last long.

Not long after this he began talking to all sorts of different girls on Facebook. And then pictures showed up of him kissing another girl. Not only were we not broken up, so as far as I'm concerned he cheated on me, but this chick was trashy as fuck. She looked nasty, like she'd be full of some kind of crotch rot or another, and also she and her friends were whoring it up for the camera and kissing each other. How original. I know he hated girls like that. Not only is it lame to do that, but it also says they aren't interesting enough on their own, so they have to do such things to get attention. She probably couldn't hold an intelligent conversation to save her life. After all, he and I fell in love because we loved talking to each other.

What bothered me about this the most was that he'd stoop so low to do that to get revenge. And with a girl the man I loved wouldn't touch with a ten foot poll. It killed me to know that he'd changed so much and become that pathetic and transparent.

It was obvious that we needed to talk. He ignored me. After a year and three months of being together, he didn't even have the decency to talk to me and give me closure. I did what I regret most and poured my heart out too him, and finally got a text saying he "loves me so much" but he can't be with me because he "can't trust someone who doesn't love themselves." Apparently the fact that I left him in the first place because I refused to let him drag me down with him while he drank himself to death means I don't love myself.

In addition to this, he tried to guilt trip me, saying he was there for me the times my depression got worse. That may be so, but the defining difference between the two situations is that when I had problems, I took the initiative and went to my doctor to get my medicines fixed. He made no such attempt to get himself help.

I sent him a final text message. It read: "I have realized I no longer love you. I loved who you used to be, but that Michael is long gone. Goodbye."

This whole experience has torn me up. What hurts the most is that he lost everything that made me love him in the first place, and that as hard as I tried to get that person back, he was gone for good. The man he is now is not something I would be proud to call my boyfriend. He is still drinking and partying as much as ever, but that is no longer my problem.

I am not ashamed to admit that I'm going to see a counselor this week. I am once again getting myself help, because if this whole shit storm has taught me anything, it's that I have to take control of my life and rely on myself to be happy. I relied on him for too long and it only made me more miserable. I regret that things had to end this way, but I am going to take what I've learned to heart and never let something like this happen again.

So heres to cleansing my life of all destructive influences. Happy 2009!


*****
I tried to start some art a few weeks ago. I can't finish it. My life feels like a train wreck. I'm taking a semester of school so I can get myself together. I was planning on transferring anyway, but things just got so complicated I can't go to any of the schools I got into yet, and I haven't even gotten to visit them.

My fiance and I take a break. We both say we don't want it to be long and we want to get back together, just need space. Apparently this means he starts talking to a bunch of random girls and has pictures show up on his Facebook of him kissing a random piece of trash at a party. And then ignore me when I pour my soul out to him. I'm so hurt I honestly can't think where to go from here.

My computer barely works. It needs new RAM really badly, and is so slow I can barely get on Firefox.

I hit a deer last week. And even though the damage is minimal, the estimate is $2000. If insurance doesn't pay for a l... ]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/21886669/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/21886669/ Mon, 08 Dec 2008 17:39:41 PST
]]> ~the-perfect-drug http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/15081744/ http://the-perfect-drug.deviantart.com/journal/15081744/ Wed, 13 Feb 2008 10:50:37 PST [link]

Just thought I'd put that out there for all to see. I like friends.

]]> ~the-perfect-drug