http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:tukhida&section=today deviantART RSS for by:tukhida en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 08 Dec 2009 03:48:05 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/21616350/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/21616350/ Sat, 22 Nov 2008 15:32:02 PST
i'm tired of pretending. the face everyone sees everyday is fake. behind that i'm falling apart, i just want to get out. i even thought about leaving for manchester for good, just to get away, but i went up there for a week and realised that i couldn't stay away from this place, i missed everyone too much, as shit as the actual town is.

my life came crashing down around me in March this year, my mum was told that she had breast cancer on the 5th March, and less than 2 weeks later she had an operation to have the lump removed, and then things got hectic, since the 1st april we've been to the macmillan unit at our local hospital at least once a week. Everytime I go with her, its like a knife in my gut, because i think, in 30, maybe 40 years if i'm lucky, it will probably be me going through all that, and i don't think i could cope if i have to do it. I've only just stopped hiding from it all, and i'm sowly beginning to pick up the pieces, its like the last 7 months haven't been real, and its been like one very odd dream.

my friends are what makes life worth the trouble, i love every single one of them, and i don't think they realise just how much.
i realised that people actually worry about me, and they shouldn't i'm fine, really. i'll just keep on pretending life's ok, so really, i'm fine, please, stop worrying about me?

anyway, over and out... don't worry, i'm not about to go kill myself, like i said, i love all my friends too much, they mean the world to me

~X~
Friends:
100 Themes Challenge: [link]

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/21202672/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/21202672/ Tue, 28 Oct 2008 13:58:38 PDT

Well I bought myself Twilight the day before yesterday, and read it within about 6 hours of buying it, and completely fell in love with it and now want to read the other 3, but can't until my birthday or xmas *cries* its no fair, on the plus side, its only 40 days until my birthday, and then just 2 and a half weeks or so until xmas, so not that long to wait really

i haven't posted much on here in a while because i've been too tired, if that makes sense?

meh, anyway, over & out. got stuff to do.

Chloe xx

~X~
Friends:
The Boyfriend:
100 Themes Challenge: [link]

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/20417020/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/20417020/ Wed, 10 Sep 2008 09:35:31 PDT it took me fucking ages to get my parents to agree to letting me get a contract phone, and they only agreed because i'm spending too much on credit, now i've gotta go beg them all over again to pay the damn thing for me. That is going to be impossible. if you knew my dad you'd understand.

anyway, over and out, bitching isn't helping matters right now




______________________

EDIT(roughly 5 hours later): ok, so my mother is nice, she ordered the phone for me am now paying her £20 a month for it, but its worth it
~X~
Friends:
The Boyfriend:
100 Themes Challenge: [link]

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/20142892/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/20142892/ Mon, 25 Aug 2008 06:03:47 PDT mainly because of work, and family holidays. but yeah, got a fair amount of stuff written, mainly for my 100 themes challenge [link] so i'll get that posted over the next few days. There's some varied stuff, and i've learnt an interesting lesson, when i'm drinking large amounts of alcohol and writing, you get some very interesting results.

On a sidenote, my parents have just had a new kitchen fitted, it makes me happyful, and want to do lots of cooking. i'm gonna start by making gluten-free brownies . (i'm a coeliac you see) if anyone knows of any other good gluten-free recipes, please do let me know

Anyway, not much else I can think of to write in here. so its over & out for now.
__
Friends:
The Boyfriend:
100 Themes Challenge: [link]

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/19548872/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/19548872/ Wed, 23 Jul 2008 04:11:19 PDT . I've spent the best part of the last week with Darren He makes me so goddamned happy its unbelieveable.
But yeah, i'm gonna be away after today until the 31st July. I'm actually staying at Darren's flat with him, as my parents are away.

on another note. 1500+ pageviews. I will honestly love the person who gets a screenshot of my 2000th. They may even get a fic written for them.

Over and Out

Friends:

100 Themes Challenge: [link]

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/19293148/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/19293148/ Wed, 09 Jul 2008 13:38:12 PDT Also, the mood thing won't change. i'm not amused, i'm very fucking pissed off.
_________________________

What the hell is the problem? For the first time in at least 2 years, i'm actually happy. and i mean completely happy. I've found a guy who i like, and he likes me back. He's dead sweet to me & makes me smile a lot. So of course, i'm gonna tell people. Now, these people, all they seem to do is moan at me. One of them even said "you're making me vomit with all your happiness". This person is supposed to be a good friend of mine. And i've sat there and listened to all of her "omg i'm so happy" conversations, most of which when i've been feeling like total shit.
_________
Sidenote: I've suffered from depression for the last 5 years. I've been on medication for at least 4 of them years.
________
So yeah, anyway. Whenever people have been happy, i've sat there and taken it all, even when i've been in tears, i've even said, "i'm really happy for you" to them, when all i really want to do is yell at them and go "shut the fuck up, i'm in tears here, i couldn't give less of a shit about how happy you are". Thats the sort of person i am, i care about my friends one hell of a fucking lot, they mean the world to me, because, without every single one of them, i would not be here today.
For once in my life, I'm actually happy, i've found this guy, so why can't people just be goddamned happy for me? but no, instead, i'm getting moaned at for being "too happy".
For the first time in 4, maybe 5 years, i've felt ready to stop taking my antidepressants, and i'm so fucking happy about that. My life isn't controlled by tablets anymore. I've even hidden it from my parents, they've got no idea how bad i've actually been. not even my closest friends have known. I'm only telling people now because i feel i'm ready to.
So, my question, Why the hell can't people just realise that i've found a bit of happiness in my life? and actually just be goddamned happy for me?


]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/19275760/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/19275760/ Tue, 08 Jul 2008 14:38:38 PDT [ ] I am shorter than 5'4. [5ft5, haha, take that]
[x] I think I'm ugly sometimes.
[x] I have many scars. [mostly self inflicted too]
[x] I tan easily.
[ ] I wish my hair was a different color. [i tend to decide on a colour, then buy it]
[x] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color. [hell, my boyfriend hasn't seen my natural hair colour]
[ ] I have a tattoo. [getting one when i'm 18 ]
[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[ ] I have/I've had braces.
[x] I wear glasses.
[ ] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
[ ] I've been told I'm attractive by a complete stranger.
[x] I have more than 2 piercings.
[ ] I have piercing in places besides my ears. [want my nose done]
[ ] I have freckles.


Family/Home Life
[x] I've sworn at my parents.
[ ] I've run away from home.
[ ] I've been kicked out of the house. [its come close to it several times]
[x] My biological parents are together.
[ ] I have a sibling less than one year old.
[x] I want to have kids someday.
[ ] I've had children.
[ ] I've lost a child.


School/Work
[ ] I'm in school [just left. forever ]
[x] I have a job.
[x] I've fallen asleep at work/school. [i've perfected the art of falling asleep with my eyes open ]
[ ] I almost always do my homework. [if almost always is code for never, then yeah, i almost always did my homework]
[x] I've missed a week or more of school [german exchange, and illness]
[ ] I've been on the Honor Roll within the last 2 years. [*is british*]
[ ] I failed more than 1 class last year.
[ ] I've stolen something from my job.
[ ] I've been fired.


Embarrassment
[x] I've slipped out an "lol" in a spoken conversation.
[x] Disney movies still make me cry. [i'm emotional, what do you expect?]
[ ] I've peed from laughing.
[x] I've snorted while laughing.
[x] I've laughed so hard I've cried.
[x] I've glued my hand to something. [my other hand.... *facepalm*]
[x] I've had my pants rip in public.


Health
[x] I was born with a disease/impairment. [i had a turn in my eye, causing a slight loss of sight]
[ ] I've gotten stitches/staples.
[x] I've broken a bone. [at one point or another i've broken every single one of my ribs]
[ ] I've had my tonsils removed.
[x] I've sat in a doctor’s office/emergency room with a friend.
[ ] I've had my wisdom teeth removed.
[ ] I had a serious surgery.
[x] I've had chicken pox.


Traveling
[ ] I've driven over 200 miles in one day. [managed it over 2 days, does that count?, not even passed my driving test yet ]
[x] I've been on a plane.
[ ] I've been to Canada.
[ ] I've been to Mexico.
[ ] I've been to Niagara Falls.
[ ] I've been to Japan.
[ ] I've celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
[x] I've been to Europe. [i live in Europe 0_o]
[ ] I've been to Africa.


Experiences
[x] I've gotten lost in my city. ["my city" is manchester, its big, and confusing, go figure]
[x] I've seen a shooting star.
[x] I've wished on a shooting star.
[ ] I've seen a meteor shower.
[x] I've gone out in public in my pajamas. [for charity]
[x] I've pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[x] I've kicked a guy where it hurts. [also elbowed someone aswell, by accident :s]
[ ] I've been to a casino.
[ ] I've been skydiving.
[x] I've gone skinny dipping.
[x] I've played spin the bottle.
[ ] I've drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
[ ] I've crashed a car.
[ ] I've been Skiing.
[x] I've been in a play.
[x] I've met someone in person from myspace.
[x] I've caught a snowflake on my tongue.
[ ] I've seen the Northern lights.
[x] I've sat on a roof top at night. [its great for watching the sunrise]
[x] I've played chicken.
[x] I've played a prank on someone. [we get bored at work easily. we think up pranks. its amusing]
[x] I've ridden in a taxi.
[ ] I've seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[x] I've eaten sushi.
[ ] I've been snowboarding.


Relationships
[ ] I'm single.
[x] I'm in a relationship. [realised this like 10 mins ago http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/19242749/ Sun, 06 Jul 2008 20:38:16 PDT
_____


so yeah, its 4.21am (bst) and i'm still awake, i cannot sleep, my parents are away, and i'm supposed to be doing housework, which they asked me to do 2moz, but i already made plans, and i'm not cancelling them, because i owe this person muchly . i've just spent roughly 3 hours doing ironing, not a fun task my shoulders absolutely fucking cane, i still have to completely tidy the kitchen, like, make it look dead neat and all (which will take a fair while). and just generally tidy up, including my room, which will hopefully only take me 2 hours or so, thus bringing me to half 6, when i will shower, and wash my hair, before waking my little brother up at 7am, then doing the hoovering, both downstairs and upstairs. which will then hopefully bring me to 8am. when i will walk out of this house, at the same time as my brother leaves for school, and catch the 8.15 bus.

I tell you, Darren, you better fucking appreciate what i'm doing for you, this is the sort of thing i do for my friends, stay up through the night doing the cleaning, just so i don't have to cancel on them. Its how much i fucking love you lot.

___

it won't let me change the mood thing

anyway, over and out, that kitchen is calling.
_______________

Friends:

100 Themes Challenge: [link]

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/18985123/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/18985123/ Sun, 22 Jun 2008 14:47:57 PDT ____


still reading? ok, you've been warned

_____


this is gonna sound dead maudlin and depressive, but right now, i'm too far gone to care.
_____

I was just on facebook, looking at random stuff, as you do, and i happened to notice one of my friends albums had been flagged up as having new photos in it, it was an album of 6th form stuff (for those of you who don't know, i've just left 6th form) and looking through this album i was reminded of just how much i miss the damned place, i never thought i'd say that, not that i miss the lessons, more the people, my friends. Anyway, I digress, I was going through this album, smiling at the memories it brought back. I went onto looking at other friends 6th form albums, and i noticed after a couple of minutes that there were no photos of me in there at all, not even group shots, when i know i'd been there on the day, in the goddamn room with the people, and there were several instances where photos that had me in aswell seemed not to have been included. SO it feels a bit like i was never there in the first place, and that i'm not even missed, when i miss every single one of my friends in the goddamn place.

*takes a deep breath*

ok, so yeah, sorry, got kinda carried away, i'm having a bad time atm.

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/18795561/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/18795561/ Thu, 12 Jun 2008 03:50:47 PDT
Mum recovered well from her op, and has started chemo. She has her third cycle this afternoon, and i'm taking her. It seems to be going well, she has no hair. but that was to be expected. So yeah, things at home are a little interesting, everything revolves around mum's good weeks and bad weeks.

I've been to a 2 day music festival, Give It A Name, which is where the 30stm pics came from, i've got more pics on my pc, i'll upload them at some point.

And I'm leaving 6th form, and entering the world of full time work. My main reasons, are that I'm just not enjoying being at 6th form, and that when i'm around large groups of people for prolonged periods of time, i freak out, and can't deal with it. Like right now, a couple hours ago I was in a room with a large amount of people, and I couldn't cope with it, so i'm now hidden in the school library avoiding everyone except about 3 people. Odd thing is, music concerts don't phase me at all, I can cope with them.

________________________

Also just wanted to say many thanks to everyone who has faved and commented on one of my deviations, it means a lot, and gives me the confidence to write more so thanks muchly, as writing is one of my coping tools.

_______
ttfn
Chloe xx

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/17390302/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/17390302/ Tue, 18 Mar 2008 05:37:34 PDT
Anyway, i'll write more later, i'm too sleepy for this =[

Chloe xxx

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/16561804/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/16561804/ Fri, 25 Jan 2008 06:00:03 PST
and for those who have absolutely no idea what i'm going on about, go to this website =====> [link] and you will be educated =]


much loves and all that jazz =]


Chloe xxxxx

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/16402237/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/16402237/ Mon, 14 Jan 2008 12:29:16 PST

i'm still working on my story, i've got like 1700 workd of it typed up, and several more thousand to go :s ah well it'll be done soon, i hope it gets read, but i love writing it... =]=]=]

anyway, in other news, i'm losing it, my ocds are beginning to get the better of me =[ i've got a wierd alphabet type one, where i have to do it backwards, when i'm alphabetizing things. like going from z to a, not a to z, even writing it like that it feels odd, then there's the straight line one, things have to be perfect. I've somehow ended up with a new-ish one, i don't let people touch me at all, unless i trust them, however, sometimes its worse than others, like today, i couldn't let anyone touch me at all, without freaking out =[

anyway, love to all my friends and watchers and such, i'm going back to writng my fic

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/16024489/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/16024489/ Fri, 21 Dec 2007 06:08:38 PST taken a while, but i'm finally there.... oh and have a great xmas and new year all of yous =]]]]]]]



xxxxxxxx

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15849219/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15849219/ Sat, 08 Dec 2007 13:42:39 PST but it was funny

Use an mp3 player to answer the questions below.
Put it on "Shuffle".
The answer to the question is the name of the current song.
Skip to the next song when on the next question.

1. What do you want to be when you grow up?:
a million miles - Lostprophets
[wtf? XD]

2. What kind of dreams do you have?:
heart shaped box - nirvana
[hmm... ]

3. What do you think of Christmas?:
you know what they do to guys like us in prison - mcr
[haha.... odd huh?]

4. What are your current thoughts?:
shinobi vs dragon ninja - lostprophets
[now you come to mention it.... ]

5. What would you say to the person you like?:
all my life - foo fighters
[haha.... seriously.... wtf]

6.What do people think of you?:
life is a rollercoaster - ronan keating
[don't ask why i've got this... but LOL]

7. What is you favourite possession?:
POD - Tenacious D
[hmm... ?]

8. What do you do in the evenings?:
Jingle Bells - Frank Sinatra
[ok i have a lot of xmas songs on my pc.... but still LOL]

9. How do you say goodbye to your friends?:
by the way - red hot chilli peppers
[]

10. How do you say goodbye to the person you like?:
a little less 16 candles - FOB
[hahahahahahahahahaha]

11. What would you use to kill someone?:
walkie talkie man - steriogram
[well... you never know when one might be useful]

12. What would you like you bf/gf to be?:
settle for nothing - rage against the machine
[LMFAO!]

13. What do you think of life?:
Bet on It - Troy (High School Musical 2)
[interesting....]

14. What do you do for your friends on their birthday?:
Do or Die - Papa Roach
[haha......... how appropriate]

15. Who is your best friend?:
Parallel Worlds - Elliot Minor
[huh?]

16. What does it smell like?:
Ashes in the Fall - Rage Against the Machine
[lol, how appropriate]

17. What do you often shout to people?:
time is runnning out - muse
[why yes, i do actually]

18. What is you current mood?:
the fantasy - 30 seconds to mars
[haha... lies...]

19. What did you do last night?:
one last kiss - madina lake
[how appropriate]

20. Which possession do you use most often?:
we still kill the old way - lostprophets
[hmm...]

21. What did you do last time you got drunk?:
down - blink 182
[lmao, how fucking true... ]

22. What is the meaning of a funeral?:
unstoppable - the calling
[haha...]

23. What are you scared of?:
this aint a scene, its an arms race - FOB
[hmm true...]

24. What hurts you the most?:
drunk on shadows - HIM
[tehe]

25. What do you want to do when you see a school teacher?:
any other world - mika
[yeah, thats where i wanna be ]

26. What has one of your friends done?:
rape me - nirvana
[HAHAHAHA.... lol... lets not go there....]

27. Where is your newest teddy bear?:
last summer - lostprophets
[haha... not quite true, thats when i got it]

28. Your bf/gf is?:
the pros and cons of breathing - FOB
[well if i had one that'd be true.... however, there is someone....]

29. Your favourite food is?:
house of wolves - mcr
[haha...]

30. What do you hate the most?:
feuer frei - rammstein
[hmm interesting...]

31. What do you think of the quiz so far?:
everybody's screaming - lostprophets
[haha... how true]

32. What do you spend the night doing?:
shut your eyes - snow patrol
[yep, everynight baby]

33. What do you get sick of doing?:
feeling good -... ]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15817043/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15817043/ Thu, 06 Dec 2007 05:53:11 PST
also i've written several poems, just haven't had the chance to post them, along with a lot of photos i've been playing with, coz everytime i try to add stuff my pc goes haywire.... meh, i'll try and do it tonight

laters...

comment if ye will

Chloe xxx

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15489555/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15489555/ Tue, 13 Nov 2007 07:12:50 PST ah well.

Enter Shikari was most awesome, i had loads of fun =] ended up covered in bruises tho i've had a bit of a poo week :s been ill, and jst bleh in general =[[ anyway, am gonna go now, feeling too lazy for an update now

Chloe xx

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15371332/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15371332/ Mon, 05 Nov 2007 03:44:28 PST
anyway, irl, things are basically going the same way, down the drain, i managed to upset someone on saturday night, because of something that happened to me, that i couldn't control at all, that i have since discovered is linked to my bipolar disorder, however, the problem is, i've got no idea what happened to me in those 5, maybe 6 hours where i basically lost my mind, and to be honest, i don't actually want to know what i did, because, quite frankly i'm scared.

i'm still paying for it now, my head fucking hurts, i feel like shit, i'm having problems keeping food down, i've decided, i'm never ever drinking again, it fucking sucks.

sorry was ranting time, no i don't feel much better for it, infact, i quite possibly feel worse, and could quite happily die.

thanks for reading this, i don't know why you did, but thankyou anyway

on the plus side, i'm going to a concert tonight, at the UEA in norwich, which should be fun =]]

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15318047/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15318047/ Thu, 01 Nov 2007 14:57:16 PDT
i'm not doing so well with the writing it to time, i wanted to finish it for yesterday, it being halloween an all, but still i shall post it, and bloody well soon if it kills me

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15296864/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15296864/ Wed, 31 Oct 2007 05:18:06 PDT [x] You love hoodies
[x] You love jeans.
[x] Dogs are better than cats.
[x] It's hilarious when people get hurt.
[x] You've played with/against boys on a team.
[x] Shopping is torture. [I hate shopping. I shop only for books or sweets.]
[ ] Sad movies suck.
[ ] You own an X-Box.
[x] Played with Hotwheels cars as a kid. [Wellll...it was long time a go...]
[ ] At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
[x] You own a DS, PS2 or Sega. [ps2]
[x] You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
[x] You watch sports on TV. [only @ work, on the big tv, when there's nothing else for me to be doing]
[ ] Gory movies are cool.
[ ] You go to your dad for advice.
[ ] You own like a trillion baseball caps.
[ ] You like going to football games.
[ ] You used to/do collect baseball cards.
[ ] Baggy pants are cool to wear.
[ ] It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
[x] Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
[x] You love to go crazy and not care what people think. [It kinda depends...]
[ ] Sports are fun.
[x] Talk with food in your mouth.
[ ] Wear boxers.

Total = 13 points

Your Girl Side
[ ] You wear lip gloss.
[ ] You love to shop.
[ ] You wear eyeliner.
[x] You have some of the same shirts in different colors.
[ ] You wear the color pink.
[ ] Go to your mom for advice.
[ ] You consider cheerleading a sport.
[ ] You hate wearing the color black. [i wear black a lot]
[ ] You like hanging out at the mall.
[ ] You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
[x] You like wearing jewelry. [only this one necklace, and some earrings
[ ] Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
[ ] Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
[ ] You don't like the movie Star Wars. [omg i LOVE star wars]
[ ] You are/were in cheerleading, gymnastics or dance.
[ ] It takes you around 1 hour to shower, get dressed, and put on make-up and accessories.
[x] You smile a lot more than you should.
[ ] You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
[x] You care about what you look like. [only sometimes]
[ ] You like wearing dresses when you can.[i don't known any dresses]
[ ] You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
[ ] You wear girl underwear.
[x] Used to play with dolls as little kid. [didn't we all?]
[ ] Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy of it.
[ ] Like taking pictures of yourself with your cell phone/camera when you're bored.

Total = 5 points


hmm now what does that say about me?


oh and i am now dropping maths, i just need 3 more signatures and i'm there =]] i'm sooooooo happy ^^

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15282416/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15282416/ Tue, 30 Oct 2007 04:54:11 PDT
]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15273068/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15273068/ Mon, 29 Oct 2007 13:44:13 PDT 2. Consumed alcohol. [x]
3. Slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex. [x]
4. Slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex. [does the floor of a hall count? (we were curled up with each other)]
5. Kissed someone of the same sex. [x]
6. Had sex. [x]
7. Had someone in your room other than family. [x]
8. Watched porn. []
9. Bought porn. [ ]
10. Done drugs. [ ]
Total So Far:7

1. Taken painkillers. [x]
2. Taken someone else's prescription medicine. [x]
3. Lied to your parents. [x]
4. Lied to a friend. [x]
5. Been to rehab. [ ]
6. Done something illegal. [x]
7. Cut yourself. [x]
8. Hurt someone. [x]
9. Been to a club. [ ]
10. Seen someone die.[x]
TOTAL SO FAR: 15

1. Missed curfew. [x]
2. Stayed out all night. [x]
3. Eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself. [x]
4. Been to a therapist. [x]
5. Snuck out of the house. [x]
6. Dyed your hair. [x]
7. Received a ticket. [ ]
8. Been in an accident. [x]
9. Wished someone to die. [x]
10. Been to a bar. [x]
TOTAL SO FAR: 24

1. Been to a wild party. [ ]
2. Been to a Mardi Gras parade. [ ]
3. Drank more than four beers in a night. [x] i hate beer tho
4. Had a spring break in Florida. [ ]
5. Sniffed anything. [x]
6. Wore black nail polish. [x]
7. Wore arm bands. [x]
8. Wore t-shirts with band names. [x]
9. Listened to rap. [x]
10. Owned a 50 Cent CD. [ ]
TOTAL SO FAR: 30

1. Dressed Gothic. [x]
2. Dressed prep.[x]
3. Dressed punk. [x]
4. Dressed grunge. [x]
5. Stole something. [x]
6. Been too drunk to remember anything. [x]
7. Blacked out. [x]
8. Fainted. [x]
9. Had a crush on a neighbor. [ ]
TOTAL SO FAR: 38

1. Snuck into someone else's room. [x]
2. Had a crush on your friend. [x]
3. Been to a concert. [x]
4. Dry-humped someone. [ ]
5. Been called a slut. [x]
6. Called someone a slut. [x]
7. Installed speakers in your car.[x]
8. Broken a mirror. [x]
9. Showered at someone of the opposites sex's house. [x]
10. Brushed your teeth with someone elses toothbrush. [x]
TOTAL SO FAR: 47

1. Consider/considered Ludacris your favorite rapper. [ ]
2. Seen an R-rated movie in theater. [ ] R rated? i'm english....
3. Cruised the mall. [x]
4. Skipped school. [ ]
5. Had surgery. [x]
6. Had an injury. [x]
7. Gone to court. [ ]
8. Walked out of a restaurant without paying/tipping. [x] without tipping yes, without paying no
9. Caught something on fire. [x]
10. Lied about your age. [x]
TOTAL SO FAR: 53


1. Owned/rented an apartment.[ ]
2. Broke the law in the police's presence. [x]
3. Made out with someone who had a gf/bf. [x]
4. Got in trouble with the police. [x]
5. Talked to a stranger. [x]
6. Hugged a stranger. [x]
7. Kissed a stranger. [ ]
8. Rode in the car with a stranger. [x] (had only known him 2 days)
10. Been verbally harassed. [x]
TOTAL SO FAR: 60

1. Met face-to-face with someone you met online. [ ]
2. Stayed online for 5 hours straight. [x]
3. Talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight. [x]
4. Watched TV for 5 hours straight. [x]
5. Been to a fair. [x]
6. Been called a bad influence. [x]
7. Drink and drive. [ ]
8. Prank-called someone. [x]
9. Laid on a couch with someone of the opposite sex. [x]
10. Cheated on a test. [x]
TOTAL SO FAR: 48

-If You Have Less Then 10.. write [I'm a Goody Goody.]
-If You Have More Than 10.. write [I'm still a goody goody.]
-If You Have more Than 20..write [I'm average.]
-If You Have More Than 30..write [I'm a bad kid.]
-If You have more than 40..write [I'm a very bad influence.]
-If You Have more than 50..write [I'm a horrible person.]

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15270939/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15270939/ Mon, 29 Oct 2007 11:02:54 PDT
1) i'm only doing it to please my dad,
2) i don't understand anything that the teacher goes on about,
3) i need the time to try and not fail everything else i'm doing, which, for the record is German, English Language, and Government & Politics.

I did want to go into Law, but i'm not so sure anymore,

my reasons for keeping Maths:

1) my dad won't be disappointed in me


so yeah, i really don't know what to do, advice would be much appreciated please?

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15270259/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/15270259/ Mon, 29 Oct 2007 09:54:25 PDT

[link] << link to their site lol, yes i'm mental.... oh while you're there enjoy this song [link]FaBKg5iEwU

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14950447/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14950447/ Sun, 07 Oct 2007 04:40:00 PDT
anyways ttfn xxxxx

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14899508/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14899508/ Wed, 03 Oct 2007 13:42:22 PDT
its not my fault that i've been brought up hearing people talk differently to how they talk, its just so grrringly annoyed, and i hate it. I'm proud of how i talk, because it is different to them, and i don't want to sound the same as them, so just because i have a *slight* northen inflection in my voice sometimes... DONT take the piss, or you'll incur my wrath...



sorry about the rant, i was a little angry @ these two people, and had to let it out somehow, lol....


woah 3 journal posts in one evening.... hmm...

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14897614/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14897614/ Wed, 03 Oct 2007 11:07:47 PDT [link] they make much more sense than the other parties, yes, i am most definitly not sane, get over it

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14896905/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14896905/ Wed, 03 Oct 2007 09:56:38 PDT
ich habe das spiel verloren (i have lost The Game)

right, now who wants to kill me

so yeah, been doing a lot of deep thinking recently mainly about my own life, and everything in it =[ i won't go into detail if you really wanna know, email me, (i'll go amend my contact details now) lol


chloe xxxxxxxxx

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14630065/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14630065/ Fri, 14 Sep 2007 12:11:43 PDT
]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14547760/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14547760/ Sat, 08 Sep 2007 15:20:10 PDT

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14486998/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14486998/ Tue, 04 Sep 2007 12:38:32 PDT
anyway, no new deviations for a while, well a couple of days, i've got some poetry written out, just not posted them on here yet, i'll do so later when i find my notebook.

I start 6th form tomorrow, it should be interesting, not much time for poetry and/or drawing though =[ well i'll see how things go haha

anyways over and out, i'm gonna go watch the end of holby before i go back on msn ^^

chloe xx

]]> ~tukhida http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14398016/ http://tukhida.deviantart.com/journal/14398016/ Wed, 29 Aug 2007 15:47:08 PDT
chloe x

]]> ~tukhida