I just feel like I need to share this because I’ve been thinking and thinking about him lately. It’s so strange because I really feel sad about him not being here anymore. It’s just that, to me he really was a king of a music and he really did stand alone at the top. And I’m not even a fan. His death doesn’t change anything to my personal life, there is no difference but I still feel that sense of loss.

I sympathize with him and in some ways I really understand him. Of course he’s loved so so much, he’s truly one of the most famous people ever. And at the same time he’s hated by so many. And I don’t think it’s fair, how can you possibly hate someone you don’t even know? It’s just ignorant people who read magazines and tabloids and believe everything they read. They don’t understand that more than half of the stuff in magazines is made up or exaggerated. It’s sad really. It’s also heartbreaking to hear Michael pleading to not read them, to not believe stories or people until you’ve heard both sides of the story, and he’s right. He was a revolutionary singer/songwriter/dancer but his personal life almost got more attention then his artistic abilities.

I do honestly believe Michael was innocent, there’s no way he molested a child, I do not believe that. He was just a child at heart. He was a lonely child that grew up as a lonely man. A lonely man that never had a childhood. I do not disagree that he became a little obsessed with children, he refused to grow up. He said: “I am Peter Pan”. But he wasn’t obsessed with children for the wrong reasons, he loved them for their sense of wonder and imagination, for their love and pure honesty. They did not judge him, children love without limits. That’s what he loved. He did not understand that you don’t necessarily have to lose these things by growing up. You can be an adult and still love and play.

I was surprised to learn he’s very shy and sensitive but also honest. You can just hear and see he’s truthful about something. I believe the things he said about himself except for the plastic surgery thing. I do not believe he was honest about that and you can see it in his eyes, he also gets really defensive about this every time. I think he did have plastic surgery more than twice.

The truth is, he was just a lonely guy with a sad history and I think the media just made it worse by targeting him and making up these weird stories about him. And he’s just so sweet and shy and he does not even defend himself. But he’s such a good person, he gave SO much to charity and he really did try to ‘heal the word’. I found his honesty and love very touching. There’s this part at the end of the documentary ‘Living with Michael Jackson’ where Martin Bashir and he are talking about the sleepovers and he says he’s just trying to help kids form a broken family and how they need attention and care. He says: ‘We need to bond again, that’s very important Martin’. Just the way he says the last sentence really touched me, he was trying to explain himself to Martin Bashir, who did not seem to understand. It’s like he explains later: “I’m just very sensitive to their pain. It means a lot to me and I want to help”.

Watch it for yourself if you want, I can't link it here but search Living with Michael Jackson (part 9/10) and you'll find it.
It’s around 5:20. I found it painful to watch because Martin was opinionated and just trying to damage him more. It’s sad when people can’t just be honest and loving anymore, they must always be destroyed. And the way they destroyed Michael is just heartbreaking. “I have a heart and I have feelings. I feel that when you do that to me. It's not nice.” & “ People think they know me, but they don't. Not really. Actually, I am one of the loneliest people on this earth. I cry sometimes, because it hurts. It does. To be honest, I guess you could say that it hurts to be me.”

Poor poor Michael, he never really had a life. It’s like he said on Oprah: When you are famous you give up yourself a lot.



Whirl

Hi!

I'm so excited, I'm going to spend two weeks in California! I'll be leaving the 27th of July!
I'll be staying at house first, then we both go to 's place in LA, where we will meet & ! I've known these girls for yeaaars so I'm really excited to meet them!

& A few weeks ago I got a new hamster and she's adorable! Her name is Alaska, named after the girl in the book Looking for Alaska from John Green. She's really sweet but with some strange habits. She likes to bite in your clothes & she runs ON TOP of her hamster wheel instead of actually going in the wheel

Here are some pictures:



She loves my jeans


Whirl