deviantART: by:xX--Silver--Xx

deviantART: by:xX--Silver--Xx http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:xX--Silver--Xx&section=today deviantART RSS for by:xX--Silver--Xx en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Wed, 09 Dec 2009 09:37:51 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png Gaia http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/28695761/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/28695761/ Tue, 01 Dec 2009 17:15:29 PST
I'm xX--SilverMiller--Xx on Gaia, I just started playing zOMG! and I'm loving it xD

So anyways, drop me a line and a friend request, and I'll see you there!

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Glasses http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/28288079/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/28288079/ Wed, 11 Nov 2009 08:56:23 PST
My scabs fell off, so now I have cute little scars on my belly x3 I can eat without it hurting, but I guess I have a quick metabolism because I'm still not gaining much (plus the three pounds I just lost because I am sick).

BUT As soon as I'm done with my homework (I have today off; Veterans Day) I might draw some or take some pictures and upload them. We started watercolor in Art and I'm LOVING it.

Hmmm any requests? I might be able to draw some things or sketch some things before Christmas.... SO
First two to ask will get something drawn! =3 I have no ideas of my own, so I need something to draw xD

KBAI

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Taking note http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27957448/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27957448/ Sun, 25 Oct 2009 10:35:48 PDT Bob and Jekkie
tMotB
Cats
Birds
Rodents
Fish
Autumn
wingless flyers
Neverwhere
Humans-MM,MJ, etc
Update
Faust?
Currency
Righam
Colonies/provinces
Other worlders
Etherworlds
mountainside castle-built in
Cat clan-characters
my cpu drawings
freezerlands
rainbow
hot rod car?
old forests
herd
underwater air flyers
instruments

time to go D:

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Ideas http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27859353/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27859353/ Mon, 19 Oct 2009 17:44:13 PDT Though the wind at lunch kind of makes it a bit colder...

But any ideas anyone? Just whip up a quick plot like this happens, but this needs to be helped or changed. Something drastic, like an adventure or something I can really sink my teeth in. I need something to liven up my days when I have spare time aside from watching TV and sleeping...

But, I got a new jacket made of soft leather... it makes me feel really pretty, and my new haircut helps me out too. So, if I get time I'm going to draw myself. My jacket is a bit darker than my hair, so it goes nice... Plus, we've been talking about the Lost Boys in English, and she asked us what it would take for us to leave if something you don't like goes on in your country, and I said Next to nothing. I'm craving adventure and danger... to go out in the wild... because my imagination is being suppressed right now, and in art we're doing still life (not that there's anything wrong with that).

So, PLEASE someone give me a concept... or something to maybe brighten up my life... As soon as I don't have much homework and I can get online I'll draw my brains out and RP and just have a ball. I can't wait till then.

See you all soon!

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Work http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27799430/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27799430/ Fri, 16 Oct 2009 14:51:38 PDT
I'm a bit glum from the week, the Prozac still helps; I don't dwell on stuff as much or long. For the most part I'm in a calm mood, a bit on the sleepy and my belly hurts a bit.

A guy at school I talk to told me the day I came back that if I brought in my guitar(we can bring in drums, guitars, but nothing really loud to school) he'd buy me a string for the one that broke, he'd tune it, and play it for me.

He tries to show off, but not in a cocky way, and he carries my little roley backpack(I have to have the roley backpacks because of my scoliosis.)to all the classes I go to that he can too without running out of time. He's a sweet guy but he knows how to keep his distance. My friend Kira says he's clingy, but he knows when he's needed or wanted around my lunch group. I wish all of my friends would sit with me, especially the ones that just walk around.

One poor guy has trouble with his emotions, and he tries his best to fit in, but he just gets made fun of behind his back. I'm one of his only friends, so I tell him whenever he wants to sit with us he can. He walks around, but he never comes and sits unless if I see him and call him over. I help him with geometry

He sits next to me in that class and I try to help him all I can. People can't see that he's a really sweet guy, but he gets upset about bad grades(just like I did). He came up to me one day with tears in his eyes because he said no one could accept him for who he was, and that everyone made fun of him. I tried my best to make him feel better, but he's one of those guys that he thinks the only way to work it out is to keep on that until it passes. I swear, I hate the people who make fun of him, even my friends talk behind his back. D<
I've been eating lunch the last few days (been too lazy to do homework) and I have to scarf down my food to try to eat it all until the bell. I buy a cookie every day(yum) and I have to eat that on my way to class D:
It turns out one of the kids that was in my grade school is in my Biology class =O I always thought she looked familiar >_> She's really sweet.

Hmm, let's see... weird dreams, whoever wants to hear about them just note me... lots of homework.
BETTER ART! I ROCK at still life now. Thanks to my teacher ^_^ She puts all of our art on the wall and critiques it. I like it, because now I'm challenged, and I can improve my art instead of, yes it's wonderful, just fix this. My current art teacher says, if you don't want to start over, do this, this, this, this, a bit of that, and this, and it should be okay. I like it. I hope I can take some of my work home to scan it to put it up =3

WELL. I think I'm going to do some homework and go sleep. Because sleep is good. And I have three papers due Monday (also known as lunes in Espanol. They don't capitalize their months or days. Por Que? D: I'm not sure. Me cumpleanos es la primero de erero! = My birthday is the first of January =3 Dia de los muertos es right around the corner, too. Fenomenales, pero yo soy still getting to know the basics D: ) One paper of which is five typed pages long, another is a normal essay, and another is for a test.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Glue D: http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27610671/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27610671/ Tue, 06 Oct 2009 07:27:25 PDT

I have to go, going to go see grandma and show her my wounds. xD Then I have to start on homework D;

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Swine Flu http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27405630/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27405630/ Fri, 25 Sep 2009 08:07:09 PDT Oi, I've been having some cool/weird dreams too. =3 Dad says the Prozac might be causing that, but I've always had weird dreams. =O
As far as I know, I'm still getting my surgery next Friday, so everything should be smooth sailing from there.

I have 25 more minutes online ;o; Notes AWAY!~

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx 7 Stitchpunk? http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27341168/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27341168/ Mon, 21 Sep 2009 15:22:40 PDT [link] from the movie 9

And I'm wondering what I will use. I'm going to sew out an outfit, and hopefully make little metal hands, but I don't know how to sculpt her skull mask and spear. I think I might use wood... but I'm open for suggestions. =3
I hope I get to see 9 again this weekend with dad <3 I LOVE that movie. =3
Now back to homework. >_>

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx STONES http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27245268/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27245268/ Wed, 16 Sep 2009 13:04:39 PDT
Back to homework D:

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Schools http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27174270/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27174270/ Sat, 12 Sep 2009 16:35:03 PDT Sam, the girl I was talking about earlier, has a twin brother, which is also in a lot of my classes. They're polar opposites; Sam's reserved, while Michael's outgoing. And, I think he is what the world needs. He still has a spirit of a child, and he jokes and plays around. He has a good sense of humor, but he's also kind and can be serious when needed; in class. He's nice to be around because it's the first time in ages that I've wanted to play with someone like two puppies play... it brings out my inner child, and it feels like I regain some of my youth.

He gets my paper in art class whenever he can, and I told him, "If you get any sweeter, you'll give me diabetes." x3 He almost chocked on himself laughing so hard. But him and his sister think I need a hamburger... Sam says I'm a stick(what I call girls that look like they're make up out of twigs, toothpicks and sticks.), and Michael tells me to not loose anymore weight. >_>

Anyways, I saw 9.

I LOVED IT. I want to go see the movie again. It was so trippy, but very touching. 7 rocks. So does 9, 5, the artist, and the twins, 3, and 4.

I think my personality is a mix of all of them. <3 I loved all of the characters, but those stood out to me. I'm going to go see if there's any art out yet on dA!

See everyone later

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Apocalypse http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27066262/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27066262/ Mon, 07 Sep 2009 02:35:44 PDT but it still makes me uneasy of the dream. I just hope the dream is not one of my intuition dreams....

The clouds... they spun around the sun in the afternoon. A few clouds where off and pointed inward at the sun like a sign. They started swirling quicker and quicker around the same spot, then a horrible jerk pushed our planet in motion. The sun drifted closer and closer, and a rainbow ring shot out from it. The trees caught fire, and another ring, bright white/yellow, shot out, blinding us all, and bringing the heat wave that would end all life on Earth.

There was more to the dream. I think it was telling me what to do... I don't know if it'll change anything, or everything... I just have to try my best.
Now I shall finish my history paper =3

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx If the bombs go off... http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27029078/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/27029078/ Sat, 05 Sep 2009 06:07:32 PDT And I have heard it said,
that every mushroom cloud
has a silver lining.

Well, my depression medicine is working

Prozac is good stuff. Though mum and I think I have an overdose of serotonin from the medicine because I'm deathly tired, but I think it's school. I have from 6-8 hours of homework every night, so I come home, eat, do my homework, then go to sleep. =/ I don't mind, it's not that hard, plus, with the program I'm in, once I graduate High School, I'll already have two years of college done, and an Associates Degree, so it's worth the extra work.
I had my first Spanish test of the year(it's the second week of school here), and I think I did good. So, that was the fifth test I've had this school year all ready, mixed in with quizzes, pop quizzes and more. I'm reading three books right now for my English class. I have to read 600 pages every nine weeks and get points on a test for reading them to get a passing grade.
I met a lot of new people (with the help of my medicine) and they're pretty cool individuals. I befriended a guy and his sister, and they're in two classes of mine together (which I think is cool.) I've improved in art phenomenally. I've never thought I'd get this good ever... my art class is helping a lot, plus my own practices. Maybe I can draw over the weekend at dads and scan some sketches.

I had a lot of dreams last night... more than usual. And I know what kind of dreams they where; the kind of dreams with once I see them, they'll come true. So far one part of my dream has come true; my two male betas, which mum put one in a floating cage in the others cage, Jin got out, and they beat each other to pieces. They're still alive, but their beautiful fins are torn to pieces....and they had such a beautiful display, especially Rouge, I've never seen a fish like him. But, that was one of the dreams.
The other ones where that Embers had died, claiming by a demented lady vet, but what she actually did was mess up her brain, and gave her some syndrome that was slowly killing her. Another was my friend became dangerously diabetic, and had to give herself insulin more than usual. Also, dad hit a couple in his car, and killed the guy, and injured the woman. The couple had gems growing in their front yard and dad and I where trying to get them, is what led up to it. Another dream was a preppy girl was getting in dad and my way so she and I started fighting, then dad and her mum started fighting, and I hurt the girl bad and she ran away, so we went after her, for reasons unknown, and found ourselves in a canyon with little bridges and flotation devices on the water. I almost fell in, and saw a large fish right under everything, and it freaked me out and I clung onto the things for dear life. That's all I can remember vividly, but there where a lot more... I just hope they don't come true.

But, I'm leaving to see my dad in 30 minutes.... and I can't wait to see him....
Dad and I went to Disney the weekend before school, then mum and I went to the Zoo last weekend, to say the least. (I'm running out of time online) I GOT TO PET AND FEED STING RAYS. Oh freaking yes. I love the cute little squishy creatures now.

Now I want to buy some as pets when I get older D: I also saw the same Harpy Eagle that was there last time <3 Oh he was such a gorgeous bird... He was displaying to me, too <3 The Disney trip was amazing, as well.... but I can't say what all happened, it would take too long D: Hopefully this weekend dad will let me get online again. D: If not, I won't get to talk to anyone for another few weeks. >_>

I miss everyone dearly.

Laurel, I hope you feel better... I've been gone too long to know what's happening.
Eilish, I want to ask you what was the book you read where children where taken apart for others to use, because I think they have that same book in my library at school =O If they do, I'll be sure to read it for you

Ani, call me sometime D: I want to see how your little Gus is doing, and I still want to commission you ;D
Natalie, I miss you dearly, we gotta hang out some weekend with Dalt... ]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx 15 minutes http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26836820/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26836820/ Wed, 26 Aug 2009 13:11:33 PDT
I won't be on for another week+ because it's my therapist that is telling what I can and can't do right now, so no art still. I started school Monday, and just yesterday I had to stay up 'till 11PM to finish my homework. I'm in Art class and the room smells like somewhere I used to go to in Michigan, so it really calms me. I've improved A LOT since I've been on, so when I do come back, expect really good work.
Dad got me a new album on Sunday, by the band 'Owl City' and now I'm hooked. I love their album 'Ocean Eyes' just listen to the whole thing, there is not one bad song on it. 'Cave in', 'Hello Seattle', 'On the Wing', 'Fireflies', and 'Vanilla Twilight' are my all time favorites.

But, school started and I'm swamped every night... I'm not sleeping well, either. They gave me depression medicine, and it feels like it's working a bit, so that's good.

It won't take full effect for a month, but it seems to be kicking in quick. I guess I just was deprived of the chemical, and just the slightest of changes are the biggest to me.
I have one more week until it's been 10 weeks after my surgery; after that point I won't hemorrhage anymore, so I can pick stuff up, and not worry about getting hit in the face.

And the surgery is working, I still get sick, but now I don't have to take antibiotics just yet. I have to take a LOT of Vitamin C pills, and get sick for 3 days but then I get over it.

I got allergy testes Yesterday, and I got 50+ needles pokes in my back, then they did deeper testing with injections, and I got 12 shots in my right arm. They FINALLY found out the obvious, I'm allergic to cats and dust xD I already knew that, because if I get cat hair in my face, I have bad allergic reactions, and dust doesn't help, either. But, I convinced my mum not to get rid of my little Meow meow. <3 So kitties stay, dust goes.

Well, I have one minute left, so I guess I'll just wrap it up.
Real Life friends, call me when you get this, all other friends note me, e-mail me, or something, cause I want to hear from you all and how you're doing.

I won't get it for a while, but still.

See everyone later. ^_^

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Me achin back D: http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26656820/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26656820/ Mon, 17 Aug 2009 18:36:52 PDT School starts next week today. I'm really angry about that because I'll be stuck with the same people for the next four damn years. And for the next years I won't have a life, because I'm in the International Baccalaureate f---nuts programs. I hate it I hate it I hate it.

I want to move, or get away from this place. I hate it. It's too hot and too muggy, and my dogs keep ruining things dear to me, and I'm just ready to break. I'm in a very bad mood, and I haven't realized it because this is the first time in a few days I got to actually say what I'm thinking without someone loosing their mind on me.

But, yada yada yada. I'm going to go back and read now, so, see ya never!
I want to draw something, but mum won't let me, so you won't see any art from me in a while, too.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Medicine http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26564398/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26564398/ Thu, 13 Aug 2009 08:18:19 PDT But, we're going to the doctor again, because the long list of what's wrong with me just keeps getting bigger. Mum's going to try to get them to put me on the medicine that helped a kid that has the same asthma as me, and was depressed like me, when we where young. Let's hope I can get some, at least. If they don't work, there's no hope left. I'll just stop the pain myself.

So let's hope the medicine, if they give me any, works, or else you won't be having any more journals from me.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Let the rain come down http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26524875/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26524875/ Tue, 11 Aug 2009 10:48:11 PDT

_{Into the ocean, end it all.}

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx I guess http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26497922/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26497922/ Mon, 10 Aug 2009 04:47:40 PDT
Well, I went to bed crying last night, so, I guess it's hopeless for me. I don't get a week of relief anymore, I just get more depression. It just will never end...

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Only If http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26487980/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26487980/ Sun, 09 Aug 2009 16:31:36 PDT

When there's a shadow,
you reach for the sun.
When there is love,
then you look for the one.
And for the promises, there is this land.
And for the heavens are
those who can fly.

If you really want to,
you can hear me say
Only if you want to
will you find a way.
If you really want to
You can seize the day.
Only if you want to will you fly away.

When there's a journey,
you follow a star.
When there's an ocean,
you sail from afar.
And for the broken heart,
there is the sky.
And for tomorrow are those
who can fly.

Ooh go doe bay mwa.
Ooh go doe bay mwa.

Ah! Je voudrai voler
comme un oiseau d'aile
Ah! Je voudrai voler
comme un oiseau d'aile, d'aile...

Ooh go doe bay mwa.
Ooh go doe bay mwa.

If you really want to
you can seize the day.
Only if you want to will you fly away.

Silver's been singing it to me all day.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx HAPPY BIRTHDAY dA! http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26448445/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26448445/ Fri, 07 Aug 2009 16:02:34 PDT I'm currently watching them [link] and waiting for the party to start! I'm having my own little party here, too! So as soon as their party starts I'm going to get some cake I made, and start playing some music! 8D I'm going to ask mum if I can take pictures =3

And, I'm just about to get two more dA shirts! 8D Go watch dA party, and wish this great community a very happy 9th birthday!

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Cherry Cherry http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26396797/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26396797/ Wed, 05 Aug 2009 07:35:29 PDT

There's nothing else I can say~

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Kjarni http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26284664/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26284664/ Thu, 30 Jul 2009 20:09:31 PDT D Kjarni means 'Nucleus, Theme, substance, subject matter, and short' in Icelandic.
Listening to Man Research as soon as I thought of the name and got it, too. ;D So now I'm going to associate it with the song.

_{this is the breakfast club!

bring me coffee in the know
see the taffu on the send
i got sunshine, i got you
there's nothing, nothing life can do -oh -oh-oh

yeah yeah, ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya
(you're the hero, you're the hero)

bring me junkie in the love
he said nothing in the tongue
to kill the model from my door, oh yeah
to kill the model from my door

[Chorus]

to kill the model from my door
to kill the model from my door
from my door
from my door}

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx E before I http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26251932/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26251932/ Wed, 29 Jul 2009 10:16:47 PDT The real rule is I before E except after C, but in this case, it differs.

Introducing, Veiw.(Pronounced same as view.) A Spirit of Good and Guidance. She is the white dragon in my recent pictures. The form of the Purest Simplicity.
I might make a ref soon.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Neil Gaiman http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26194748/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26194748/ Sun, 26 Jul 2009 16:43:20 PDT "You get ideas from daydreaming. You get ideas from being bored. You get ideas all the time. The only difference between writers and other people is we notice when we're doing it." and "Sometimes you wake up. Sometimes the fall kills you. And sometimes, when you fall, you fly." - Neil Gaiman.

Greatest guy, other than dad. Neil Gaiman is the most whacked guy I've known(but haven't met); he's demented, he knows the right words to scare and intrigue the readers, and he never seems too happy, but happy in his own way.
He's a cool dude.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Dream and Hate http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26136722/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26136722/ Thu, 23 Jul 2009 18:53:06 PDT was dead.
Dreammoods dream dictionary says:
_{Slaughter
To see or slaughter an animal in your dream, signifies a loss or an end to an aspect of yourself. Consider the significance of the animal being slaughtered. If a lamb is being slaughtered, then it represents a loss of innocence. If a pig is being slaughtered, then it signifies an end to your greedy or lazy nature.
Meat
To see raw meat in your dream, signifies that there will be many obstacles and discouragement in achieving your goals.

To see cooked meat in you dream, denotes that you will see others obtain the object for which you have been striving for.

To dream that you are eating meat, signifies that you are getting to the heart of the matter. It may also indicate that you are recognizing and utilizing your instinctual energies.
Pig
To see a pig in your dream, symbolizes dirtiness, greediness, stubbornness or selfishness. Alternatively, the pig may represent opulence and overindulgence. Perhaps it refers to someone who is dirty or someone who is chauvinistic.
Cow
To see a cow in your dream, symbolizes your passive and docile nature. You obey others without question. Alternatively, a cow represents maternal instincts or the desire to be cared for. For some cultures, the cow represents divine qualities of fertility, nourishment and motherhood.
Horse
To see a horse in your dream, symbolizes strength, power, endurance, virility and sexual prowess. It also represents a strong, physical energy. You need to tame the wild forces. The dream may imply that you have been horsing around. Alternatively, the dream indicates that you need to be less arrogant and "get off your high horse". If you see a dead horse in your dream, then it indicates that something in your life that initially offered you strength is now gone. This may refer to a relationship or situation.
Sheep
To see sheep in your dream, indicates docility, conformity and that you lack initiative to venture out on your own. You lack individuality and tend to go along with the group. You are showing a lack of creativity in some aspect of your life. The dream may also be a metaphor on being sheepish. Perhaps you have done something wrong.}
Hahahaa only gives me more reason to be angry with me.

Anyways, for the second subject, yes, I've been very hateful lately. I haven't been this angry, and disgusted in myself, I think, ever. The odd thing is, is it feels good to be a disgrace, to know society hates you and wants you dead, even yourself. I've been finding some lovely songs to describe how I feel, too.

Bite to break skin (Liegon of Doom Remix)- Senses Fail
This Broken Soul - Spyro Soundtrack
What have you done now? - Within Temptation
Never Be Free - Garbage (Love this song <3 It really shows the inner conflict in me)
Welcome Home - Coheed and Cambria
Scream - Kill Hannah
Breathe Into Me - Red
The World is Black - Good Charlotte
Send Me An Angel - Deadstar Assembly
Red to Black - Fort Minor
Given Up - Linkin Park
Kill the Lights - The Birthday Massacre
Don't Stop - Innerpartysystem
Hate Me - Blue october
Forget It - Breaking Benjamin
Suppuration - Core
Orchard of Mines - Globus

I didn't put the links because I don't think anyone would really care to listen to them. I dunno, long enough for you all?

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Coraline http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26095898/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26095898/ Tue, 21 Jul 2009 20:32:16 PDT You where here to see us rise, we will be here when you fall! there's more to it than that, but that's what I remember most from the book.

There was a preview before the movie though... about 9. The movie is coming out 9/9/09, so, you know I have to see it. It is by the same people who made WANTED, my favorite action/kill movie <3 That movie looks out of my imagination... I HAVE to see it. I'm surprised I didn't make it, honestly. =/ It has dead animals with machinery moving them, the dolls(main characters) have these little lazer/flashlights for eyes... oh... it seems like a dream come true for me! I want to see the movie so bad.... I want to try to find a trailer to put it up here so everyone can see this gorgeous move, even though it hasn't come out yet.
9 - The Official Trailer
[link]
Watch it, or you're missing out of the wonderful, horrible things going through my mind.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Why? http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26077188/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26077188/ Mon, 20 Jul 2009 23:12:23 PDT
Why am I like this? Why did I turn out so horrible? I'm such a fucking horrible person.... I mean... I don't know, I just don't deserve any of this anymore.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Broken Promise http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26074346/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26074346/ Mon, 20 Jul 2009 20:12:04 PDT
It's not like anyone reads these sorry excuses for journals. But, anyways, I didn't win the competition, because I'm not good enough. I put all my effort, heart and soul into that picture, and I did my absolute best, but I guess I'm just worthless because I can't do anything right. Well, that picture was just a week wasted in my life. So, I'm down more money because I spent the whole week on that picture instead of doing my chores.
Maybe I should just stop trying. It's not like someone gives out awards at the end of your life for 'Most Improved' or 'Best Achieved', but, hey, I'd never get any of those, either. Maybe I should just become another drone in society. People who spend all of their lives in a cubicle seem to just pass life by like it's nothing, and maybe it is. Ah, if only in the mood section they had a suicide smiley. It would be fitting now. But don't worry, I'm too much of a wimp to kill myself, because I know no one would come to my burial, so what's the use dying if you won't be missed in the afterlife, either?

Well, don't mind me, I'm off to be depressed and draw some stuff that will never matter to anyone, and will never be good enough, no matter how much I change it. It will always be worthless.
I think some of you know what I mean.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Stomach http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26073131/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26073131/ Mon, 20 Jul 2009 19:04:20 PDT

I might as well stop eating. It hurts too much, and afterward my body tries to throw it back up. I usually don't throw it back up, but when I do, i won't eat again because my stomach hurts even worse.
I just ate something, and I went into a fit where my stomach keeps trying to expel what I just ate, but I didn't let it, so now it feels like I got punched in the stomach and it hurts really bad.
I'm going to monitor what I eat from now on to keep this from happening, because it just hurts too much, and it makes my body loose energy. It feels like I just ran after my fit.
I just took a tums so I'm just getting a bit of acid reflux of tums in my mouth. At least it tastes better. =/

Anyone have any ideas of food that is easy on the stomach?
I'm not going to eat much from now on. If it keeps hurting like this, I don't want to eat.
Night.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx D: http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26063602/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26063602/ Mon, 20 Jul 2009 10:56:10 PDT I don't like taking my asthma meds because, not only, does it raise my pulse to about 140 bpm, but it makes me dizzy and I get headaches. I was exercising with mum on the Wii last night, after I took my rescue inhaler, and after I was done with my 32 minute exercise, with some running, I felt like i was going to pass out and throw up.

I just took my Advair, which is a bronchial dilator and it has a steroid to release swelling in my lungs, and my hands are really shaky because my pulse is up, so no drawing for me anytime soon.

I'm working on a lot of pictures right now, but I don't know if I'll ever finish them >_> I want to paint with acrylics today, but I have no canvas boards, and no brushes for my acrylic paints...

Otherwise, I have no plans for today, so another day wasted in my summer. Oh well, who cares. Eh, I want to loose just a bit more weight... then I might be happy with how I look.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Coffee http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26045826/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26045826/ Sun, 19 Jul 2009 14:00:15 PDT
It sounds nice right now.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Devious Journal Entry http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26034001/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/26034001/ Sat, 18 Jul 2009 21:14:08 PDT
Honestly, what color is your underwear? Tan

Honestly, what's on your mind? Horses

Honestly, what are you doing right now? Talking to Natalie and Dalton, on the phone and Eilish and Natalie(again) on IM.

Honestly, who is your best friend? I have a bunch, so in no order: Natalie, Eilish, Ani, Daddy and all you people who watch me <3

Honestly, have you done something bad today? No, not that I know of D:

Honestly, do you watch Disney channel? No, i don't like what they play, unless it's a good movie. =3

Honestly, who is the last person you talked to on the phone? Natalie and Dalton.

Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now? Nope.

Honestly, what makes you mad most of the time? I get mad all the time, but usually at myself or ignorance.

Honestly, do you bite your nails? Ooh no D: I let them grow until they get in my way xD

Honestly, do you want to see someone this very moment? Yeah

Honestly, are you keeping a big secret right now? Yeah, I guess. xD

Honestly, do you have a friend you donÂt actually like? xD no, if I don't like someone, I'm not their friend xD

Honestly, does anyone like you? Like me as a friend, a lot, my parents love me =O

Ability

Can you blow a bubble? Yup =3

Can you dance? I wish D:

Can you do a cart wheel? no D:

Can you tie a cherry stem with your mouth? Hahaha! no. xD

Can you touch your toes? Yup, and I can touch the floor with the palm of my hands, but that hurts bad D:

Can you whistle? Yup =3 When I was young i couldn't, so I said "whoot whoot" when i called my dogs xD But now I whistle all the time

Can you wiggle your ears? Individually and together.

-skilled-

Can you wiggle your nose? Yup

Can you roll your tongue? Yup

Can you make a clover with your tongue? Yup, too

Anger

What do you do when youÂre mad? Work out, exercise and scream until i'm done D:

WhatÂs the worst thing youÂve done when you were mad? Made a lot of people bleed...

Ever made anyone cry when you were mad? Most likely I have, but i can't remember D:

Do you swear when youÂre mad? Yup D:

Tears

Ever really cried your heart out? Yup

Ever cried yourself to sleep? All the time.

Ever cried on your friendÂs shoulder? Nope. Don't cry in front of people.

Ever cried over someone of the same sex? Yup.

Do you cry when you get an injury? Nope.

Do certain songs make you cry? Yeah D:

Do certain movies make you cry? The boy in the striped pajamas made me tear up, and K-Pax did, but that's all D:

Happiness

Are you usually a happy person? Not really.

What makes you the happiest? I don't know... Video games and drawing, I guess D:

Does being with your friends make you happy? Yup.

Do you believe in yourself? At times...

Do you wish you were happier? Yeah. D:

Is being happy overrated? At times, yes.

Can music make you happy? Yup =3

Love

How many times have you had your heart broken? Let's see. I guess 4 or 5 -can't remember- And other times, just not by people.

Have you ever loved someone so much that youÂd die for them? Yup, I'd die for any of my friends because I'm too weak to see a loved one die.

Has anyone besides your friends/family ever said ÂI love youÂ to you? I guess, but i put most people under the friend category regardless. D:

Do you actually hate anyone? Haha I'm good at hating.

Ever made a hit list? No...

Have you ever been on a hit list? Yup.

Are you a mean bully? I just hate on people that hate on me.

Do you hate George Bush? Big Brother is watching.

Self-esteem

Is your self-esteem extremely low? A bit.

Are you good looking? Some say so, but i need to loose more weight in my eyes, though i am considered underweight...

Do you wish you could be someone else? Yes D=

Physicality

What is your current hair color? Champagne blond D: It's turning duller it seem... ]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Updates http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25988277/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25988277/ Thu, 16 Jul 2009 15:08:51 PDT I have a few more dollars at my dads, but this is the money at my place and in my bank

So, in three months I've raised half of one thousand dollars. Oi, I'm going to have plenty of money once I can go!

That means I can do a whole bunch of things!

Thanks to =Novemwolf, I have successfully talked my mum into buying me a new diet! I'm now on a gluten-free diet, to see if it helps me any

If it does, mum will continue feeding me gluten-free products, if not, I'll just have to try to go find another diet that will fit my needs D:

I'm getting ready to clean out the rest of my closet soon, so I can get rid of some more things =3 I'm going to try to get some empty bins from the garage and pack away some stuff. Hey, I've got a whole bunch of stuff that I'm getting rid of, so if you'd like anything, just ask about it! The only thing is for pay for shipping, because I don't want to pay for giving my stuff away, I'm better off just giving it to Goodwill. I'm thinking about taking out all of the shelves in my closet and putting in a drawer, and an easel on top so I can draw... but we don't have the money for that >_> Well, dad just moved, so I can put some stuff in my room there

My nose has healed enough that i can start doing my exercises again. Mum and I are going for walks every night with the dogs, and it's actually making me really happy. A mixture between exercising, being with my fuzzy monsters(the dogs) and talking with my mum (along with showing off Embers, my beautiful little baby puppy <3 But she is still aggressive, so i have to keep her away from people which makes me even more happy <3). My grandma's physical therapist assigned my grandma some exercises that she can do with me today (I have no idea what they are, I just overheard her saying that), so maybe that will give us a chance to actually bond...
Grandma was actually watching me play video games a few days ago when mum was doing her nails(she can't do them on her own), and that made me happy. One, I LOVE when people watch me play video games, two, she probably had no idea how the character was turning into a wolf, or what the imp was when she appeared out of his shadow <3

I am a few steps away from being finished with my entry for *iProxy's contest, I just have to add a few things, then I'll post it. I'm actually incredibly happy with how it's going, and my mum ACTUALLY likes it. She doesn't like my digital art, so it really surprised me when she said, "Wow! That's really good!" She NEVER says that about my digital work, so I know that that picture is wonderful!

Well, I'm off to make salad for my family, then I'm going to spend the rest of the night, like usual, on my contest entry

Ta~

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Snake and Silver http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25863635/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25863635/ Fri, 10 Jul 2009 15:45:19 PDT It's cool because you could see her little teeth marks x3 It stopped bleeding after I washed it off with soap and water, I haven't done anything else with it, and it's healing very well already. I don't think she did it as aggression, but as fear, because when she bit me I was putting her down on a baby tree to crawl around on (a new toy) and I think she thought I was going to drop her. I'm still going to hold her. Just because I got a measly bite doesn't mean anything negative, I just have to socialize with her daily so she can get used to the fact that I won't drop her.

My Dads grandma sent us something today, she sent us a 21 oz bottle full of silver. Silver can cure a bad immune system, cuts and wounds, infections of the ears and sinuses, help calm lung troubles, high blood pressure, etc. Silver rocks ;D I have to take a tsp. every day, and I'll keep everyone updated on how the silver is working for me. I also have to take Vitamin C daily and a teen vitamin for girls, so I can keep healthy, and I feel like I'm getting sick again.

I'm going to go lay down on the couch and probably play some video games, I'm getting very tired.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Question-Meme Generator http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25814367/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25814367/ Wed, 08 Jul 2009 09:56:19 PDT

made by

1. In a race between you, Eilish and Starling, who would win?
Probaby Starling because she's super tall D:

2. Who would win in a duel, Rai or Tay? And what kind of duel would they pick, anyway?
Neither, they'd pick a starling contest and they both chose their own little way of keeping their eyes open, until they sizzled out or something like that.

3. Have you ever been in Natalie's house?
Actually, no I haven't... I've known her at school about a year and a half now, but I usually don't venture from my house )= I'm afraid I might do something wrong at someone else's house, so everyone comes to my place

4. Will Ani eat those green eggs and ham?
Yes. Yes she will.

5. Do you think Tay is a virgin?
>_> <_< Ahem I remember a journal about something like that so.... no. x3

6. Who is Dad's best friend?
Me =3 Friend wise, James

7. Does Silver have any pets?
Silver as in me, yes. I have: 3 dogs, 1 cat, 13 snails(and counting), 2 betas, 5 other fish, 2 shrimp, and I think that's it...

8. Who would you rather get stuck in handcuffs with, Starling or Eilish?
Eilish

9. What do you think of Shadow?
She's awesome =3

10. What song could be Sakura's theme song?
Sakura Sakura

I feel okay now...
I'm going to do this again once I get home xD

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Birthday http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25793562/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25793562/ Tue, 07 Jul 2009 11:00:12 PDT
I had a bad dream last night. It took place after the apocalypse and me, and a few other people(I didn't recognize them) where in the ruins of my house. Suddenly a doberman came into the house and began to track us. We tried closing the door, but the dog was smart, and it could open it. A pack of them followed the one doberman and picked us off one by one. For some reason everyone was exhausted, and we couldn't do anything but watch as the dogs took a person by the leg and dragged them off. Then a crew of bikers appeared in the doorway, and apparently I knew them, because I got up and we started fighting the dogs. The bikers and I created a distraction long enough for the others to get out of the house and into a car in my driveway. I was the last to run out, and I locked the door behind me and closed it. Every time I ran a few steps the doberman unlocked the door and tried attacking me. In a while, the dogs got loose and I picked the doberman to fight with. It snapped and clawed at my face and tore at my neck and chest, and I did the same... I began to beat the dog into the ground until it became mush... I looked up and something went through my mind that I had just killed a part of myself in that act. I looked up at the sky and it was dark and glum. I woke up.

Honestly, I think the doberman was supposed to resemble my anger, and how it affects me, but by getting rid of it, is just like getting rid of a part of me. The dream made me accept that part of me. I know I'm always going to have a quick temper and stay angry for long periods of time, but that's just a part of who I am.
' If the dog is vicious and/or growling, then it signifies some inner conflict within yourself. It may indicate betrayal and untrustworthiness. If the dog is dead or dying, then it indicates a loss of a good friend.' - Dreammoods at [link] and also 'To dream of the apocalypse, signifies an emotional and dramatic change taken place within. The dream may also indicate the end of one kind of lifestyle and the beginning of another.'

I always say that it's time for change, but I think this time change is not an option, I just need time with myself to get to know me, and to grow in my mental and spiritual state.

Well, otherwise the day just started... Hmm. Last night I was playing with my cat's belly, and he started clawing and biting me, and he left a cool little cut on my thumb. I don't want it to go away... it's cool.

[edit]

Oh yeah, I forgot to say this.

My snail had MORE babies. D: It never stops! We have little baby snails all over the fish tank! I'll have to count them again, but I'll have to wait till night when they come out...
This edit is not minor D: Snail babies are important!

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Screw a title D: http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25784598/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25784598/ Mon, 06 Jul 2009 21:43:36 PDT
I went to the ear nose and throat doctor for another post-op checkup. They ripped out some blood clots(same as scabs inside your nose). They didn't get one, because the suction on the metal pipe they where using wasn't strong enough, but they did rip the top, and that hurt.
Eh, I really don't feel like writing. I'm not in the best of moods. I'm not really angry or sad, I'm just emotionless. I don't feel good, but not necessarily bad, either.

Blegh. I'll make a journal in the morning or something...
See ya

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Asthma http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25715836/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25715836/ Fri, 03 Jul 2009 12:47:42 PDT Back on Halloween I had a sleep over with two of my friends. I was the last to fall asleep, at about 4 in the morning. Well, one of my friends I heard was wheezing like an asthmatic, but she doesn't have asthma. I got worried for her and stayed up to see if she would be alright. About an hour later the wheezing subsided, and I calmed down and went to sleep. The next morning I told her what happened and how worried I got. I told her to get tested for asthma because I knew she had it. She said, No she couldn't get tested because her parents kept saying she didn't have asthma. Every few times a month I would remind her to get tested, and she's say that she asked her parents and they kept refusing to test her.
A few months later...
Today after all of this time she called me and said she had been tested for asthma. She has asthma. I feel so bad for her, because all this time she's had a case of asthma, and still had been forced to run the mile in this hell-like heat, and she's been having troubles in her sleep... and the list goes on. I'm glad that they diagnosed her, though asthma is a horrid disease to have, at least she can have proper treatment.
She's lucky she never went into anaphylactic shock before then...

Aside from that, yesterday I got two Beta fish, Jin and Rouge, meaning Red in French named after my dad. Jin is suicidal, and he tries to jump out of his vase, while Rouge displays to the other fish in the big fish tank. Rouge looks like a floating rose, he's so gorgeous, and Jin is Red White and Blue just in time for the Fourth of July

So far my day isn't going well. I think I just need to take my minerals and vitamins. Maybe I should talk to my dad and see if he can help me with some of my anger and stress.

My friend that has asthma is coming and sleeping over tonight, so I'll be on maybe later tonight when she's asleep.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Back Up http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25649388/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25649388/ Tue, 30 Jun 2009 11:11:01 PDT I've been talking to =Novemwolf, ~no1speshal2u and ~Vitskertur the last few days and they've been making me very happy, and I've decided I needed to grow some. So, I'll try to be more nice, but I might not post as much as I should and all. In the time that I'm gone, I'm going to practice making my anatomy and art better thanks to ~Vitskertur for kicking me into it.
That's about it. Adobe quit on me, so I can draw for a while. My scanner doesn't work, so no scanning traditional work. So, I'll be laying dormant for a while.
Peace.

"Feelings, sensations that you thought was dead
No squealing, remember that it's all in your head.

I'm useless, but not for long, my future is comin' on."
[link]

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Done Updating http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25610313/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25610313/ Sun, 28 Jun 2009 15:37:10 PDT I know this is rude to say, but, I really don't want to talk to anyone anymore, and I don't want any of you knowing how I am or what I'm up to. Honestly, I'm just done.
This doesn't mean I'm like leaving, I just don't think I'll talk to anyone much. I'll probably cancel roleplay, and if you send me a note, good for you, I probably won't respond to it. I'll still post and fav on art and stuff, and submit my own, yada yada.
Nothing happened, so don't ask, I just want to be left alone.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Surgery Update http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25591324/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25591324/ Sat, 27 Jun 2009 17:06:11 PDT My dad gave me his old laptop so I can go online when I'm in bed, but I'm on my computer now because I'm putting the Kathy Griffin show on my Zune to watch it in bed.
Well, my teeth don't feel like someone punched me in them today, and my throat doesn't hurt so bad anymore. I had to be intubated so I could breathe. (they stuck a breathing tube into my throat) It's weird, because now I can feel the empty space in my sinuses, and I've never been able to experience that before, and my ears are draining for the first time like they should. I'm on antibiotics, and I think that this will actually clear up.
Monday morning I have to go back so they can take out the sponges from my nose(to keep the bleeding down) and I'm dreading that because I know it will hurt, but it's just another step to recovery, so I'm also looking forward to it.
I know how my grandma feels now; how to not be able to get up quickly and move around without help. I feel bad for her, and understand what she's going through, and I wish I would have learned it quicker... But, mum told me that yesterday night I couldn't walk straight (In my head I was doing fine xD) and she had to assist me every time I got out of bed. I remember her assisting me, but I though I was walking just fine. I also realized something was different when my eyes told me my hands where on opposite sides of the keyboard and they touched one another... my eyes where crossing without me even realizing. I decided that it was time to get off the computer then xD
Mum brought in my little plant babies (my watermelon and honey dews I planted with the seeds I gathered from the fruits we bought at Wal Mart) and the Honey Dews I planet on Wednesday are already growing over the top of the pot

You can't see the dirt under them they are so thick. Ever since my step mum gave me those vines I've acquired a green thumb

Everything I plant grows.

Today I am a bit more aware of what is going on around me, and I think my body now understands what happened and is fixing the problem quite fast. I knew that surgery is what I needed, my body just had to get a kick in the right direction. My nose hasn't bled once since the surgery (which is phenomenal, because the doctor said I wouldn't stop bleeding for a while). It just shows my body heals quick. What I've also noticed is my skin is a bit more pale, and I can see my once hidden scars on my skin again(yeah, I'm so white my scars just blended into my skin. Yes, my scars are white, but the new ones are a pinky color until they age and also become white).
It hurts to inhale through my nose, and it hurts to flare my nose just because there is caked blood inside my nostrils and it's tugging at the skin.
Because my ears are draining in the first time, in who knows how long, everything is intensified, and I can hear a lot better and I'm a bit more jumpy because of it. I get scared more easily because everything is so loud.
I also cut my nails for the first time in a few months(I wanted to see how long I could get them without them being a pain xD They got good size =3 My longest was 1/4 of an inch!). Well, I cut all the nails on my left hand, and the thumb nail on my right hand, then I got sleepy and fell asleep xD So, I have four more left on my right hand. Which reminds me I have to cut my toe nails and get that dang nail polish off of them that I put on when I was on my period...(I get too girly on my period... ugh I hate it)

By next week I should be up and drawing again, and that is the estimated time I will have to be on a strong narcotic. After that I think I will just be on pain medicine like Tylenol. They think it will take about a month to three months to fully heal, and after that it should be smooth sailing.
Well, I'm tired again so I'm going to watch Kathy Griffin make some drag queens and gays laugh, which will make me laugh ;D And I will also get a sneak peak at the airline I will take to New Zealand (Air New Zealand), because that's the plane Kathy and a plane full of happy gays are on in the show.

Talk to you all later.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Ow http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25569169/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25569169/ Fri, 26 Jun 2009 14:32:26 PDT Ahhh I'm tired. I'm going to sleep now and check in later.
The pain medicine doesn't work D:

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Surgery Today http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25559641/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25559641/ Fri, 26 Jun 2009 05:49:40 PDT I don't think tears have left my face since last night, I'm just so stressed, because I don't know if I'll come back. My will is low, so it's up to them to keep me a live. It seems I've been noticing a lot of things about death and whatnot, and I'm really pissed about it, because i'm already imagining the worse, and I don't need any help...

Look, I'll see you all after the surgery... I'm just not handling anything well because for the past month and a half I haven't been able to take my minerals, so I'm back to my old stressed self.
Yeah, I'm listening to Kathy Griffin to see if the crazy bitch won't help me smile a bit.
116 BPM and I don't know my blood pressure, but it must be pretty high because my veins are jumping out.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Haha Blisters http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25524973/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25524973/ Wed, 24 Jun 2009 19:16:39 PDT I did about 1,500 stair steppers the other day on the Wii when I was showing my friend Megan, who spent two nights because she didn't want to go home, how the Wii Fit worked. Well, I did them all on my toes, so my calf muscles hurt xD I haven't exercised in about a month because of the antibiotic I was on, and now that I have, it's hard )=

My surgery is on Friday... it keeps getting closer. I don't know how I'll be after it; if I can get online or not... if I can't, I'll tell my dad to post something on his account, or tell him my pass and let him post here.

I'm finishing up the front legs on my Silver plush, I should get is completed by next week if I'm able to, because of my surgery.
I'm really angry, because I'm going to have to take off all of my jewelry for the surgery, even my silver bracelets... So, I'll be a very bitchy person that day for sure. So, afterward I will hopefully be able to take my B-12 and Silica and all of my other vitamins and minerals, so I might be a bit happier.
I've been forcing myself to eat more because my mum and dad keep telling me to, and now my stomach hurts... this is the exact reason why I stop eating; everyone pressures me about it. I'm smart, I know when I'm hungry, so I'll eat at my leisure, not when someone puts food in front of me and expects me to eat! I get weaker when I eat like this. I eat healthy stuff, carrots, oats, chicken, etc. I don't like the unhealthy crap my mum and grandma eat. I wish mum would just let me eat on my own.

I'm lucky, get a load of this, I haven't exercised in 24 days says my Wii, and it says since I have not gained nor lost anything down to the tenth of a pound.

If I eat what I please, when I please, I don't loose or gain anything; I know my body and what it needs.

Well, my head hurts, and so does all my muscles D: (they hurt because I spent two nights sleeping on the sofa because my friend spent the night, so they'll heal after tonight because I get to sleep in a real bed tonight.

) So, I'm going to go out to the sofa to finish up the rest of my Silver plush's front legs.

Tata~

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Bad News http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25454246/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25454246/ Sun, 21 Jun 2009 13:35:48 PDT
So, I want to help him, bad, but I don't know what to do. I wish we could move to New Zealand, but mum won't allow me to go with them.

I need to find them a home, and jobs. I have to...
I wish I could help them. I don't have a job, and the state laws says I have to be 16 before I can get one. ;__; I can't call around, because I don't exactly know what he's looking for, either... so I'm stuck.
The greatest girl in the world was helping me last night to find jobs in New Zealand, but now I don't know what to say...I want to go there now, but my dad doesn't have custody of me, and I still don't have the money.

I know things will get better, I just wish it would be sooner...

NO MY MOOD IS NOT CHEERFUL D:

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Overshot http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25401554/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25401554/ Thu, 18 Jun 2009 18:43:58 PDT This weekend I will have $500 for my trip~ Half a thousand!

I got the extra money from my dad

he's been sneaking in his money to my savings; he knows I really want to go. I haven't gotten to talk to him yet today because he's at work, and I had to help mum fill something out for my surgery... and now he's not answering D: But, his account is ~no1speshal2u so if you have time send him a message thanking him, it would be very appreciated by us both.

Today my mum and I went to Joannes Fabrics today after we went and saw grandma, and, sadly, no, they have no more of my fabric D; But, we bought a new fabric, similar to the old one, AND I KEPT THE NUMBER. So, if they run out of it, I can order more fabric by giving them the number... which I didn't know for my old fabric D: So, I will be starting over on my Silver plush, and I'm going to use the same fabric when I'm done to start my fursuit.

While we where there I found a CD (SonicAid: Music to Inspire Positive Thinking) for me to use before, and after my surgery. So, once we got out of the store, we started listening to it, and I began reading their booklet(how to get the best out of the cd, how to maintain a healthy being, steps on how to keep happy and positive, and steps on what to avoid, etc.).
Right away I began to feel relaxed, and I ACTUALLY felt like I was important and that I COULD achieve anything I set my mind to... which, I haven't really ever felt before.

I love this CD.

Once I got home, my mum and I ate, and I went to bed(4 PM in the afternoon) and I woke up at about 8:30 PM; an hour ago. I still feel tired D: They had to take me off the antibiotic, because they noticed it had started to damage my muscles and joints. So, now I'm antibiotic-less until my surgery, and we're all hoping nothing will go wrong(I could relapse and get very ill before the surgery again). I've heard them talking about the pain medicine I will have to take afterwards, and I overheard that I might be taking pain killer high enough to class... D: Well, at least I know I'll get out of it too much to care how much it hurts xD Honestly, I think it'll be more relief than pain. Everyone is telling me it's going to hurt like all hell, but I think after all the pain I've gone through with the cyst and the infections, it'll be like a walk through the park.

I'm going to see if I can't update Zune(they went offline a few days ago, and came back with an update) and put my new relaxing and aiding music onto it.

I'm sorry I haven't gotten all my due art out, my hands have been very shaky lately, because of my asthma medication, and I don't want to ruin it because of that. D: I'll try to get all due art finished before my surgery.

Don't forget to join the Love Train! [link]

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx People around the world! http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25356009/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25356009/ Tue, 16 Jun 2009 15:54:42 PDT We might as well get his started as soon as possible! I'm planning on making a love train, to show that it is possible for everyone in the world to love one another. I want to get at least one person from every country in the world to join the train, and after I've rounded up everyone from around the world, I'm going to draw a picture with everyone in it!
Starting: Now!
Leaving: When at least one person from every country joins.

After that, I will still add more people if they want to(even after the picture is done, too!)
(Africa and other poor nations can count as a whole, because I know some people don't have computers there.

)
You can sign up with your current country, or where you where born, and all you need to do is post, note me, or contact me somewhere else if you have any of my information xD Just tell me the name you want me to put you down and where you want to be placed in. (example: I want to be called Silver, and I was born and live in America(U.S.A.)) Then I will take your name, put your screen name next to it, and put you under the name of your country.
That simple! I want to do this because it might bring us a step closer to bring world peace. No fee, nothing! You just have to tell me the name you want me to put you down as, and your country!
If you want to, spread the news! Tell your friends, tell your friends friends, even if they don't have a fursona, or a picture of themselves(for the final picture I will make of everyone) I will still put their names down. (Example, if my mum would want to join I'd put down her name next to me, to show relation, or who told her about it.)

ALL ABOARD!
Who have joined: [link]

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx People around the world! People version. http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25355962/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25355962/ Tue, 16 Jun 2009 15:52:43 PDT We might as well get his started as soon as possible! I'm planning on making a love train, to show that it is possible for everyone in the world to love one another. I want to get at least one person from every country in the world to join the train, and after I've rounded up everyone from around the world, I'm going to draw a picture with everyone in it!
Starting: Now!
Leaving: When at least one person from every country joins.

ALL ABOARD!

Afghanistan

Africa

Albania

Andorra

Anguilla

Antigua and Barbuda

Argentina

Armenia

Australia

Austria

Azerbaijan

Bahamas

Bahrain

Bangladesh

Barbados

Belarus

Belgium

Belize

Bhutan

Bolivia

Bosnia-Herzegovina

Brazil

Brunei

Bulgaria

Burma

Cambodia

Canada
Icey, =ice-or-fire

Chile

China

Colombia

Costa Rica

Croatia

Cuba

Cyprus

Czech Republic

Denmark

Dominican Republic

Ecuador

El Salvador

Estonia

Finland

France

Georgia

Germany

Greece

Grenada

Guatemala

Guyana

Haiti

Holy See (Vatican City)

Honduras

Hungary

Iceland

India

Indonesia

Iran

Iraq

Ireland

Israel

Italy

Jamaica

Japan

Jordan

Kazakhstan

Kuwait

Kyrgyzstan

Laos

Latvia

Lebanon

Liechtenstein

Lithuania

Luxembourg

Macedonia

Malaysia

Maldives

Malta

Mexico

Moldova

Monaco

Mongolia

Nepal

Netherlands

New Zealand
Worsett, =Novemwolf

Nicaragua

North Korea

Norway

Oceania

Oman

Pakistan

Panama

Paraguay

Peru

Philippines

Poland

Portugal

Qatar

Romania

Russia

San Marino

Saudi Arabia

Singapore

Slovakia

Slovenia

South Korea

Spain

Sri Lanka

St.Kitts e Nevis

St.Lucia

St.Vincent e Grenadine

Suriname

Sweden

Switzerland

Syria

Taiwan

Tajikistan

Thailand

Trinidad and Tobago

Turkey

Turkmenistan

Ukraine

United Arab Emirates

United Kingdom

Uruguay

USA
Silver, ~xX--Silver--Xx, Red, ~no1speshal2u, and Marla.
Anneke, = ~xX--Silver--Xx Surgery, soon http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25334071/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25334071/ Mon, 15 Jun 2009 17:02:58 PDT But, he was also very scared and worried about the antibiotic I am on, because it's recommended (we found out) for 18 years and older, because it stops joint growth and bone growth, and could permanently damage my muscles. D: So he moved it down to 4 more days of it. I hope he knows what he's doing, because after a week off antibiotics, I'm sick again. Hopefully I don't dive back into the red.

While I was waiting to go in at the doctors, they where playing a movie about greatest places to hike and trek, and New Zealand was one of them

Where they where at(I'm not sure where because we got there after they announced the area) was an absolutely beautiful place.... just breathtaking. Now I have to take a camera there because I want to take pictures

Other then that, I got to deposit more money into my bank, and my total is $387 so a little less than what I expected, but still pretty good

I'm going to talk to my dad tonight to see when I get to see him next so I might be able to mow the lawn there.... or something =3

The whole day I've been sleeping... so nothing else important D:

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Ozone http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25292086/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25292086/ Sat, 13 Jun 2009 13:53:00 PDT I went outside to wash the sliding glass door, and within the few minutes of doing so, I was sweating bullets and breathing started to get hard. I stayed in the rest of the day. Yesterday the temperature already reached 100 F (that's what my mum said, i don't know if it was heat index, or what). I hate where i live. I'm stuck here until I get out of highschool and go to New Zealand for a while, but then I have to come back and bear with it again >__>
Later on today there was a BAD storm, and believe it or not, even with the temperature, it hailed. D: Out power went out for a few minutes, and the thunder was rattling the house. My poor dog Embers looking like she was going to pass out. D; I wish I could help my puppy, but I don't blame her for being fearful after what she had to go through in her last "home". She was bred over and over at the puppy mill she was at, she was beaten, starved, and was in dog fights. On top of that, she has breathing problems, and the vet she had says she had the worst case of heartworms he had ever seen. When they found her she was barely able to stand up she was so skinny. When I first saw her(4 months after they had her in the animal shelter) I still could count every bone in her body. It wasn't until after I got her when she started gaining weight. We fostered her at first because everyone told us she would die in the next few months, but even though my mum gave up on her, I didn't.
I love that dog. My mum says that we might as well be twins. She's so sweet to me, but always so aggressive towards everyone else... she's just like me in every aspect.

Anyways, today I took some pictures of some baby plants I'm growing(wildflowers, foxgloves, watermelons, and a peach which i don't think is growing x3). The watermelons are flourishing; almost every seed i planet is growing. =3 I'll try to get the pictures tonight if my mum lets me.

Last night i seemed to be disaster prone xD I scraped both of my ankles on my desk chair(the fibers are like twine), fell out of the chair when my snake tried to strike at my cat, and my cat went after my snake, my cat ended up clawing my leg(the tender part right above the knee), and Abbey, my bloodhound, ran into my out in the florida room and I fell on the concrete. (It's not over!) I chocked on my pill(antibiotic), I sprain my hip, and it swelled up to where I couldn't move it, and when I tried to get something to eat(Jell-o x3) I slipped on the tile and messed up my knee. xD
Last night was such a fun night!

My cat just clawed me. 0:
I'm just about to get paid again, and hopefully on monday I'll get to go to the bank and send over another hundred dollars into my CD(I can't get money out for a year, and I get higher interest!!)

That's all. =3 Ta da! your done

[edit]
HAHA! It's going to be 105 F on Monday. Wow that's going to suck. So much for going outside D:

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx New Zealand Trip Update http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25202890/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25202890/ Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:41:23 PDT

I started an account at [link] and I've started actually planning my trip, and setting dates and times and setting up where I'll stay... etc. It will be four years, but at least I have the time to plan, and sort everything out so once I'm there, there won't be any worries.

I have an appointment with another ear nose and throat doctor(my main one is out of the country) tomorrow to see if I need the surgery sooner, and anything else we need to know. I'm feeling okay, my sore throat is gone, but every few seconds I cough up my lung D: I'm still very weak, and spend most of my day(and night) in bed sleeping, or in bed eating x3
As for my grandma, she's in physical rehab, and she'll stay there for two weeks; after that they'll asses if she is capable of coming home or not. She's been there for about a day, and she's already fallen >__> no matter where she is she'll find a way to fall; grips on the floors, handles on the walls, you name it, she'll find a way to get herself on the floor.

I'm really sad because I'm sick, because I can't do the things I was planning to do; clean the house, train the dogs, etc. It feels like I'm wasting my summer because I'm sick. And it's always like this; whenever something fun is going to happen, I'll get sick. )= That's a main problem of my depression. But, hopefully the surgery will work, and I'll stop getting sick at much.
But, I'm still happy because now I get to plan my vacation to New Zealand, and with their website I can share it, so I'll be sending to to my dad so he can add in some things.

I can't wait to go to New Zealand.
"_{The Life Back Promise
Any holiday can give you a break from your daily routine, but it takes a special kind of vacation to give you back your life. In New Zealand you can rediscover the things you love about yourself and the planet you live on. Start fresh with nine days (or more!) of fresh scenery, clean air and amazing adventures.}"

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Hospital http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25155428/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25155428/ Sat, 06 Jun 2009 04:31:10 PDT Anyways, they gave me an IV drip(the man-nurse messed up the first time when he stabbed me in my inner arm to give me a pain killer, which hurt. The second time he got it in my wrist, which I was conscious enough to think it was pretty cool when they turned it on, because I could feel the liquid running in my arms. Sadly, I could feel it up to my shoulder because I'm so skinny ;_; but still. It was cool

)
I'm sorry I didn't reply to everyone's comments, I'm still not myself, and I'm not functioning properly. I still have to see if I can draw >__> But, thank you all for being here for me in these dark times, I really appreciate it.

They gave me a new medicine so I can eat(it's still an antibiotic, but it's a lesser strength.). My sore throat has almost faded from existence, and little by little I'm becoming more aware of what's going on

I'm very happy right now, because I can drink, eat, and everything doesn't hurt as bad as yesterday, so I know I'm getting better.

Love you all, and I'll probably be back on tonight.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Dieing http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25136998/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25136998/ Fri, 05 Jun 2009 04:11:06 PDT I don't think I'm going to get better. I wish I could just get the surgery now, because I feel like I'm living through hell.

I've been up for about 10 minutes, and I'm too tired to keep myself upright in this seat. That's not good. I'm going to go sleep now.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Surgery http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25126426/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25126426/ Thu, 04 Jun 2009 13:58:19 PDT
I'm not afraid. As soon as I get this done, I might stop being sick so much. Today when I woke up I had(still have) a horrible sore throat. I've had strep throat before, and this is nothing like it; it hurts worse than strep. As long as I'm out of pain, I'll be happy.

It's lightning out here, and I'm not supposed to be online, so I'll update everyone more later.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Journal http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25091592/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25091592/ Tue, 02 Jun 2009 15:38:00 PDT
I think it's my subconscious telling me I need some time alone, or maybe to think. For the last few days I've been cleaning a lot, not for my chores, but for me. I cleaned my entire room in three hours(the floor was not visible when I started, and my closet was a wreck) and I started on the garage. I had to stop in the garage because something spilled, and the fumes made my head hurt.
But, I still have plenty to look forward to, which is keeping me happy: schools almost out, I have a few days left of my period, and after i can wear my lovely robe to bed again, I've been saving money for only two months for New Zealand, and I already have $322, so I know some good months are to come, because I might get my killed dog watching job back in the summer when the owners go away for some holidays.
My mum and i are getting the pool up, so I can do some swimming... and since I'll be out in the sun, my hair will turn a light blond(also known as a silver blond). I got a yoga ball, so I can exercise and work on my balance.

for the first time in ever, I've written something(I posted it, A Simple Melody) and it actually turned out good, and now I'm working on the visual for the scene it takes place in.

Oh, for the last day of school, Fruity is going to shave his head bald, and I'm going to (hopefully, hopefully hopefully) get my hair braided in 'corn rows', AKA those braids that they braid down to your scalp. I know it won't look good, but it'll give me a reason to put beads in my hair so i can 'clack' when I walk

Well, back to cleaning~

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Hospital and Money http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25030996/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25030996/ Sat, 30 May 2009 15:08:07 PDT right as my mum and my grandma's physical therapist says. they took CAT scans and X-Rays and one showed she had a blood clot in her chest, but the next X-Ray, the clot was gone, and we don't know where it went. My grandma has a heart disease where her heart throws out blood clots, which makes her have so many strokes, but I think this one is more serious. But, usually something will tell me something bad will happen, and that something is not saying anything; so I'm not worried at all. She'll be back home in no time.
[edit]
She's lost hope and her will; she wants to die. She never wanted to live like she is, she says; taking medicines to keep her alive and such. Before we left the first time Silver and i gave her some of our soul, but only she can decide to take it. I hugged her before we left, and her life aura is low as well. She's dieing. A Death beetle was in her room, too, but it was only a small one. It died, and I think it's trying to set a bad omen on her. She's the one who decided if she'll make it through this or not; I just hope she chooses to live a few more years. But, if she thinks its her time, I'll let her, because I somewhat know how she feels(taking medicines to keep you alive and healthy), but i don't know how it's like to be in delirium most of the time. Poor soul. I'll keep everyone updated on her.
[/edit]

I currently have $322 dollars for New Zealand

Next week I'm getting my ID for my account, and I'll get to add more money to my CD bank account(more interest).

I've got my computer running, and I'm on it. The screen is TWICE the size of my mum's computer, so everything looks so small xD Everything is also in higher resolution and more quality. I have Windows Black on my computer now, and I love it! I'll take some screen shots of my desktop soon to show how big it is. Big screen means big pictures!

Later today I'll probably spend most of my time in my room for a change; I'll be cleaning and getting rid of stuff so I can live in it instead of just being in it.
Oh, and *IgnisAlatus, I'll take pictures of your snail probably tonight, because they're nocturnal, and I haven't gotten around to it. =3 I'll try to take pictures of videos of all of my pets tonight, if my mum allows it.
Well, my mum and i are just about to leave to see my grandma in the hospital then we're going to cruise around town aimlessly because we have nothing better to do D:

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Unacceptable http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25009267/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/25009267/ Fri, 29 May 2009 04:29:45 PDT 1. Just before went to bed I saw a commercial for 'Drag me to Hell', which sparked the demons after me.
2. I was listening to music with my frieneny(we're friends, but we really hate each other; she wants me to die, but I don't want her to.) Lindsay and we were listening to rap most of art class(Eminem; Crazy in love, and my 1st single. The other music was Innerpartysystem; Don't stop, and at the end, Sigur Ros; Von, and Dogun.) She liked the music, surprisingly so we were both happy to listen to it.
That's all I'll say. I'm not telling anyone the dream; not even who were in it, because it shames me. If you listen to the songs(especially 'crazy in love', but listen to the Hateful parts of the lyrics), it might tell you a bit what happened. But, I'm glad I know it was one of those 'just for the hell of it' dreams; I had nothing much to think of last night, so that dream is what came out.

It was my mums birthday yesterday, and I gave her about 5 pieces of my art(I still have to take pictures of them and put them online) and she was really happy with them =3
Today's Friday; last day to dress out in Gym, and after that we have 3 and a half days left of school!

I can't wait to get out of there.

p.s. Spiders are plotting our demise; I know it. Last morning when I was brushing my hair a spider darted out from my eyebrow and into my hair. D: I couldn't find him afterwards. That, and a spider crawled out of one of my friends pants in gym xD Don't know how that one got there. xD

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx One for the money, two for the show http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/24963788/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/24963788/ Tue, 26 May 2009 15:39:07 PDT
Aye, that's what went through my head when this horrid little broad passed me at school today and spat, "Excuse you." If I see her again, and she says that, I will tell her, "One for the money" and punch that little barbie and "two for the show." and punch her again. Let's hope that doesn't happen, for both of our sake.
I have a quick temper D:
In other news, I have to take more tests after school is over(in one week! I can't wait to get out of that place! Sadly, I love my teachers dearly, but the kids there are horrid little monsters). I have to get another blood test, an allergy test, and if all doesn't go well, I might have to get nasal surgery and get my something glands removed because they're inflamed so bad. D: I'm not really worried about any of it, but I don't like getting blood drawn because of what happened last time >_>
But, I'm very happy, and a little jumpy from my asthma medicine, but okay. I'm going to get to put another $100 in my CD/savings at the end of school towards my New Zealand trip(and I'll get to see how much my dad put in there as well, because my last bank statement was printed before he put the money in xD)
I have about 3 more weeks or hard antibiotics, and they've already took quite a toll on my digestive system, but I'm trying to keep a steady weight for =Novemwolf so she knows I'm staying healthy, and won't worry

Dad (~no1speshal2u) is helping me greatly during this time, too(when I take a lot of medicine it depressed me very bad) because he always gives me life lessons and good advice. I love my dad, because he knows exactly what to tell me because he went through it, too. You hear that dad? I love you! I know sometimes you don't think that, but I do, always and forever!

Well, I have to get my Algebra homework done(my break is over) but I only have four pages left, so I'll be on within the next hour or so. Tomorrow starts are 2-day test, followed by the start of our next test that follows the next Monday, then Tuesday, Wednesday, and half of Thursday AND I'M OUT OF JR. HIGH! 8D

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx The Adventure http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/24946171/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/24946171/ Mon, 25 May 2009 16:14:32 PDT Now, it is time for the ultimate question: "Am I ready for the next Adventure?"

You better believe it. I'm more than ready... I can't wait for life to begin again. Most of all, I can't wait to be done with High school and go to New Zealand.
[link]
I wanna have the same last dream again
The one where I wake up and I'm alive
Just as the four walls close me within
My eyes are open up with pure sunlight
I'm the first to know
My dearest friends
Even if your hope has burned with time
Anything that is dead shall be re-grown
And your vicious pain, your warning sign
You will be fine

Hey oh here I am
And here we go
Life's waiting to begin

Any type of love it will be showed
Like every single tree reach for the sky
If you're gonna fall
I'll let you know
That I will pick you up
Like you for I
I felt this thing
I can't replace
When everyone was working for this goal
Where all the children left without a trace
Only to come back as pure as gold
To recite this all

Hey oh here I am
And here we go
Life's waiting to begin
Tonight
Hey oh here I am
And here we go
Life's waiting to begin
Tonight
Hey oh here I am
And here we go
Life's waiting to begin

I can not live
I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I can not live
I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I can not live
I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I can not live
I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I can not live
I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me
I can not live
I can't breathe
Unless you do this with me

Hey oh, here I am (do this with me)
Here we go
Life's waiting to begin (do this with me)
Hey oh, here I am (do this with me)
Here we go
Life's waiting to begin
Life's waiting to begin

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx None http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/24936002/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/24936002/ Mon, 25 May 2009 04:22:08 PDT I've been put on a higher dose of antibiotics because my infections aren't gone, and I've decided to stop eating; it just hurts too much. I have to go back home with my mum, which will probably make things worse, because blah blah blah...whatever.
blah blah blah, blah, blah blah blah. Who reads this crap anyways?
I'm going to go take my antibiotic so I can go puke it back up, then lay in bed until my tears lul me to sleep again.
Ta

P.S. Eilish, none of what I'm feeling is your fault, okay? There's other stuff that's bothering me in real life.

]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx Power out http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/24928833/ http://xX--Silver--Xx.deviantart.com/journal/24928833/ Sun, 24 May 2009 17:35:41 PDT
]]> ~xX--Silver--Xx