http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:xXOdakotaXx&section=today deviantART RSS for by:xXOdakotaXx en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Mon, 28 Dec 2009 09:14:03 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/29243937/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/29243937/ Sun, 27 Dec 2009 20:18:33 PST Xstrawberyxswing (10:29:18 PM): quick!
Xstrawberyxswing (10:29:21 PM): say something random!
sallyton3 (10:29:24 PM): we need to talk tmrw hon
sallyton3 (10:29:26 PM): i have to go to bed
sallyton3 (10:29:27 PM): and
sallyton3 (10:29:36 PM): HYPERSPONGEYNOODLE!
Xstrawberyxswing (10:29:41 PM): perfect.

Had to throw that in there.

Aaanywho..I hope you all had a faaabulous Christmas! And Hannakuh! And Kwanza! And Ramadan! And Winter break! And Snow day! And if you didn't have any of that, I hope you have had a fabulous time anyway, and an even better New Years!!!! My Christmas was very very nice, my mom went shopping for me all on her own, I was so proud of her!! (she really cannot shop ) and I was so so so happy she loved the gifts I got her, as well. She was so surprised! She's very hard to buy for and I really wanted it to be special for her. Aaand! We actually had a white-ish Christmas here in NJ!! That was the last thing I'd wished for, thanks Santa!!! ^^

..lol I really just wanted to use the Jolly emote, cause it's so damn cute. Right now I'm really missin my friends...I'll see them soon, though. Work and lack of communication (friend lost her phone lol) have been the main causes..yea lol. It's just...I feel so sad and insecure sometimes. Deep down, I'm constantly terrified that I'm not as important to them as they are to me, you know? Like, I have different groups of friends, too. Well, two. And that feeling goes for both of them...I'm hoping I'm just paranoid, I just can't handle being lonely, it scares me more than anything...

Oh noes! Didn't mean to make this journal so depressing, I was just writing as I thought lol. I KNOW this summer will fabulous, though. I can't wait for Spring to come. I can't wait for New Years! My one friend is throwing a party but I'm not going, though I really want to, another friend (~applexcinnamon) and I have an ongoing tradition-ish thing that we spend New Years together, plus I never get to see her anymore and I misses her epicness...well, her alter-ego's epicness, anyway >=#

Other than missing my friends, life has been good. My family is doing well (my four legged ones too), I got a new job at a coffee & tea shop, school has been going well (all A's except for algebra 2...which I'm failing T.T) aaand I'm graduating this Spring, 2010~!!! God, that will DEFINITELY be the happiest day of my life haha

Soo how have all you been?? Lemme know, I'd love to hear from you, if you watch me or not, lemme know how you've been!! I promise promise promise I've got photography coming, but...my laptop broke T.T And I haven't gotten another yet...and I don't have photoshop...so...you'll have to wait...again You love me, remember?!?

All right, before I head off to bed I want to feature one of the deviants I watch. She's fairly popular so you may already know her, but I draw so much inspiration from her, and really look up to her as a photographer, that I wanted to feature her here, even though not many look at my journals lol
Here's the lovely =Ronaaa, enjoy! She very talented and very beautiful

Cheers, everyone!!! Have a healthy, happy and safe New Years!!!!!!!!
's
Odak
uhmm...

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/28095271/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/28095271/ Sun, 01 Nov 2009 19:28:31 PST
P.S.: A thousand apologies for my long absence here on dA, except for some very rare occasions I am on here every day, I'm one of those people that never logs out haha. I've just been disgustingly busy and lazy and the combination of the two means no artwork for my loyal watchers =[ Though since Tennis season has ended I'm about to have a lot more free time so start expecting a poop-load of new work!!!!

Following =bitchinblack's example and writing my journal for the self-promotion month. For details on this, see $Moonbeam13's journal.

1.Who are you?
I'm a senior in high school counting down the days till I leave those 4 years of hell behind me and start college. I want to major in photography and journalism, and am slightly terrified of the fact that it will be a VERY hard job to get... I'm first and foremost and artist but athletics are important to me, too. I work part time on a horse ranch and would love to ride for college; I surf and run in my free time and am in love with tennis ^^ As for art, I’ve been a martial artist for three, going on four years. Music keeps me going through the day, I definitely could not live without it

2.What is your artistic passion?
Like any aspiring photographer, I have a constant, almost insatiable thirst to capture the "perfect" picture. And by perfect I mean the weird, the beautiful, the ugly, the sorrowful, the amazing and bizarre moments of life that are, inevitably, very hard to caputre haha. Besides photography, writing is my passion in life. My writing skills have blossomed since I took a creative writing class in my sophomore year, and I know wherever my life takes me, with photography or anything else, I'll always be writing.

3.How did you get into art?
It's funny, because even when I was teeeeny tiny (even though I still am lol) I was always writing little stories about my stuffed animals and my pets, and when I got into middle school and "stole" my mom's piece of crap digital camera, I felt compelled to capture anything and everything that peeked my interest. And now, those are the only things I could see myself doing in the future. Art, from photography, writing, martial arts and of course music, is the best way I can express myself.

4.How do you inspire yourself?
With other art, of course Music from my favorite artists gets me in the perfect mood to create, while the amazing works of the people I watch here on dA get me inspired and motivated to challenge myself to create something better than my last piece. Nature provides for me the most though, with never-ending inspiration and beauty to learn from.

5.Where would you like to see yourself in five years?
Hmm...*thinks hard* In five years I wiiiilll...prolly just be getting out of college o.O Oh gawd I CANNOT think that far ahead haha. Well...I hope to be seeing my novel being turned into a movie hahah That's probably my number one far-off dream lol...I hope to have a steady beginner job as a photographer and/or writer for a magazine by then...and to definitely have a guy by then T.T Oy haha

Guess that's it? So tired right now =_= Talk to y'all soon!!
~Odak
uhmm...

HOW BOUT THEM IGGLES?!?! BOO YEAH!!!

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/24114082/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/24114082/ Tue, 07 Apr 2009 15:10:21 PDT 어딜 봐도 네 모습이 보이고(무너지는 내 맘 )
숨길 수가 없어 baby 단 1분 1초도
I can't let go(go go go)
...*turns music down to type*

Save the Wolves!!!

[link] "I'm prepared to bid for the first ticket to shoot a wolf myself." -Idaho Governor Butch Otter

Nice guy, huh?

On March 6th, 2009, U.S. Interior Secretary Ken Salazar approved the Bush Administration's discredited plan to eliminate Endangered Species Act protections for wolves in Idaho and Montana--a decision that could lead to the deaths of more than 1,000 wolves! This plan ignores current science on what wolves need to maintain a healthy population over the long term. It also ignores the hundreds of thousands of citizens who have asked for a better plan. Urge President Obama to stand up for the wolves. [link] Click here to go straight to a form to send to President Obama to stop Salazar's plan and maintain Endangered Species Act protections for gray wolves in Idaho and Montana.

The Defenders of Wildlife Organization
is a national nonprofit membership organization dedicated to the protection of all native animals and plants. They work to protect and restore America’s wildlife, safeguard habitat, resolve conflicts, work across international borders and educate and mobilize the public. Joining the organization DOES NOT COST money, it helps get your views across in a mature, affective way and DOES make a difference. There is no long-term contract, mandatory contribution, and signing out of receiving emails is just as easy as signing up! To learn more, check out their homepage [link]

*features below, you guys don't have to read my personal crap, I'm just spilling my thoughts*

Personal
Hey all, me again...Ah, sorry if you got this same opening as another journal, I accidentally pushed the "send" button before it was done lol. Anyhoo...I quite hate my world right now...I crashed into a canyon full of pointy rocks at the bottom but I'm not dead. That was a lousy metaphor for failure. Failure is quite amazing, I must say. No matter how many times I try and continue to fail, it proves to be just as awesome as the last time, if not more. People you love come and go all the time, just like acquaintances, I guess the only real difference is how much you become attached to them. I'm not a bad person, I'm just amazingly stupid and careless. I deserve this pain to an extent, and I've accepted that. The one thing that really bothers me though, is this damn stupid little hope that I can't crush just yet. I'm hoping it'll fade over time. I just find it incredibly annoying.

Once again, I find myself with nothing to hold onto except dreams. It's like grasping vapor. It's there, you can see it and smell it and maybe even hear it, but you just can't touch it. Not yet. Living for a dream is like gambling, in the long run I could end up with everything I've ever dreamed, or I could end up like my amazing pessimistic side is thinking right now: with a relatively boring but calm life with only a tiny slice of my dream-life come to fruition. I don't want to get let down by own hopes and dreams again. I don't know if I could take it. I don't want to hurt anymore. But for some stupid reason, I'm embracing that hope of my dreams coming true, I'm going to embrace it wholeheartedly with everything I've got and go for it, because if I've learned anything from the people I loved (and I guess still do) it's that if you think you're going to fail, you will. I've made that mistake twice before, once the major time that pretty much landed me where I am in this unhappy state (to say the least), so if I really don't want it to happen again, I better fucking get it together. For myself. For no one else but myself, cause that's all I've got left to do.

Other Important Links
What is Global Warming... ]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/22913117/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/22913117/ Fri, 30 Jan 2009 21:12:33 PST
Personal
Aaaaall right!! I'm quite ashamed of myself haha, I haven't journaled since November o.O quite rude of me not to even try and wish you guys a Merry Christmas (holidays)or Happy New Year. I did get in two scrap photos for the occasions, but they weren't art, just a little somethin' to let you guys know I was thinkin' of you. I'm gonna do a quick personal update now and then get serious. Wass been goin on? Lesse...a couple weeks ago, me, my best bud Alyssa (xXSaruNinjaXx), my dad, my Sensei and his fiancee all went to the martial arts expo at the Tropicana in Atlantic City, NJ. Boy, was it awesome Just a small gathering of dedicated martial artists, but there were some big names there, too!! The Shaolin Warriors of China were there, in all their kick-ass flippyness and hawtness (omg that one guy didn't speak a word of English but I KNOW he understood somethin!! He took his shirt off RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME ) And I got to meet Bill Wallace, Cynthia Rothrock...also, Don the Dragon Wilson, John Pelligrini, Joe Lewis were there, and many more!! I had a lot of fun sparring and getting my ass kicked by black belts XD, shopping in the Quarter, getting drunk on Vanilla Frappuccino, and running around in the spinny doors at the entrance to the Tropicana (rofl. that is a story for another day XDDD)...
School has been going well. I just got done Midterm exams yesterday, they were annoying and I bombed my History one, but overall I did decently...And I can't believe it lmao, for once I am ABSOLUTELY caught up on ALL my homework Let's hope I can somehow keep it that way...Everything else has been going okay, too. But I'm just kind of apprehensive, because it never stays easy for long =/ The only thing I'm really worried about is whether my crazy mother will let me play on the lacrosse team this year...she's convinced it'll ruin my life and I'll fail everything and that I'll suck...which isn't true at all...but...we'll see :gloomy:

[In]Fluence
All right, things that you really care about now haha. If any of you watch ^kkart, you'll know about his recent inspiring journal. Here be a link in case ya don't [link] Check it out, mates =] It's important to contribute in every aspect of your life, and if you expect something to come to you, you better be puttin' somethin out there to be deserving of that something in return. I wish for good critiques and advice on my photography, because I know, I am only a decent artist, I'm only a beginner and I need help, so to gain that, I need to give something in return. I need to try and contribute to this amazing community more, even if it's only little at first and even if no one really sees it at first. So...from now on, there'll be something important in each journal. Features of less-noticed artists, links to important art articles, world articles, and other such things. I need your help, guys, so...let's give it a start =]

***So You Wanna Make a Difference?
2009!! Politics!! Obama!! Holy crap!!

What do you guys think so far? How many of you stopped to watch the inauguration? He hasn't had time to do much so far, but I feel Obama will be this generation's FDR. He's got a lot on his plate though, and some more important aspects seem to get lost among all the hustle and bustle, and that's where we come in. It's out job to remind the Obama Administration about what's important to us! The Defenders of Wildlife is a national nonprofit membership organization dedicated to the protection of all native animals and plants in their natural communities. They work to protect and restore America’s native wildlife, safeguard habitat, resolve conflicts, work across international borders and educate and mobilize the public. Joining the o... ]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/21418210/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/21418210/ Mon, 10 Nov 2008 09:34:53 PST
Not knowing this person at all, never having seen this person before, made for a different kind of take on things. Before I link you guys to the article, I wanna say a few things....things which are pretty powerful, things which are a reality check.

What really did it to me is the cry for help, a LOUD cry for help, this deviant is yelling out. When I read her page and looked and saw what was under their avatar in the top left corner, it stopped me cold. When I read their journal, and read what they said, it stopped me cold. "She's just 15!!!!" I thought to myself, and facing death at such a young age hardly seems fair...death from being sick.

I ask you guys to swing by and READ the news article, fav it, it's only a sentence long, and then, swing by her page, and let her know that are people who care, people who will keep her in their thoughts, people who will send a few prayers upstairs for her, and people who can interject some positive vibes onto her.

Here is the article-- [link]

Thanks guys, karma will find a way to repay ya all! Believe me!
---Odak-chan

Crap!! PLEASE OH PLEASE OH PLEASE LOOK HERE TOO GUYS PLEASE!!!
Another one of our dear deviants needs our help!! Please spar three minutes to read this article too!!!
[link]

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/20959485/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/20959485/ Sun, 12 Oct 2008 19:34:12 PDT
[link]

[link]

And just for the record, THIS IS NOT AGAINST SARAH PALIN, IT IS AGAINST THE SLAUGHTERING OF INNOCENT WOLVES AND CUBS

What is this world coming to? I'm just so sad all the time now...is there anything happy out there anymore? I can't find anything anymore...and when I do, it's inevitably overshadowed by the bad...I know I'm not usually so pessimistic but it's the truth...*sigh*

~Odakota

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/20410491/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/20410491/ Tue, 09 Sep 2008 16:54:15 PDT adoooorable Odak-chan!!!

Aha yeah anyway.

Gonna switch to serious mode for three point two seconds here, but everyone needs to follow--I suck. At life. A lot sometimes. And lemme just say while I have only one second of seriousness remaining--you can never truly and fully realize how much something/one means to you, how much your world really relies on that one thing, until you lose it. I came extremely close to that those last two months of summer, and I have to say I can't imagine there ever being a darker hour of my life than that...but, by some superhuman act of mercy and perhaps even love, I got another chance and am on my way to making everything better. It'll be good, it'll be okay. And I know now that, God forbid and give me strength to prevent it, if the nightmares came true and I ever fuck up like that again, I know for real that I wasn't meant to have that one thing.

Haha oooh I definitely exceeded my three point two second time span, now I must punish myself by doing 3000 push-ups. Brb

Back. Phew! I love the smell of sweat after a good workout XD Moving on.

Man, I'm so proud of myself. I've been exhibiting a massive amount of self-control lately, and I hope you don't mind but here comes another mini-rant. 3. 2. 1. OH MY GAWD WHY would a mom would want to hold her kid back? Okay, bit of an exaggeration. She isn't now per say, but her thing this summer & now has been fantasizing about how, since she doesn't like/can't do certain things, neither do/can I. Sports in particular. She thinks I'm physically incapable of anything except photography and writing, which is crap. I'm very fit and GAWD I'm so freaking hyper lately, I don't know what to do with myself DXXX She was never even fond of Martial Arts, gawd I don't know what I'd do if I at least didn't have that. She's a control freak, anyone who knows her for a week can see that. She's an amazing mother, truly, and I know I'm her kid and she has every right to tell me what I can and can't do, but holding me back is too much, and I will show her she's wrong. I'm a very vengeful (and sometimes narrow-minded) person, but again, I've been very very controlled lately. I won't even let myself rant uselessly in my mind anymore. I suppress the irrationality with rationality and think, "Okay. Right now, I just have to work at what I can, not for her, but for me. And later, maybe during college or after, I will show her, by doing everything she told me I couldn't, and doing awesome, that she was wrong." I'd say something small like, "This is for when you told me I couldn't." And leave it at that and just let her be proud of me, but she'd know to an extent that she was wrong and that's all my rational-thinking side wants. If I told you what my irrational-thinking side wanted we'd be here for another fifteen journals XD W00t for self-control!! I think I'm getting better Too bad I don't have enough self-control to make these journals shorter...ehehe

Moving on.

Photography check up. I know, I've been horrible to you lately DX I've been updating, but with crap. And that is due to the lack of photoshop. Stupid thing crapped out on me again and now I have to wait until my college friend can find time to come fix it for me. Which, knowing him, will be in another three months *sigh*

Omg *knock on wood* school's actually good I'm praying every night that it stays this way well, no. I'm praying it gets even better but not any worse Writing's...slow. *sigh* time is short lol...CHEESE sorry it was in the song I'm listening to XDD okay well I'm gonna head out afore I spazz on your anymore lol ttyl much love to all and luck to those in school!!! I hope this year is... ]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/19904071/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/19904071/ Mon, 11 Aug 2008 19:22:52 PDT
But first I wanna start this journal with a big ol' mushy spiel on how much I love dA and the devoted, dutiful and true-blue staff that keeps her shipshape and running. Without them, we'd just be a mess of fizzled arteests all dressed up with no where to go (I hope that made sense, I'm brain dead right now XD). Same must be said for the thousands of deviants that make up the artists' community. If you read this, pat yourself on the back cause you rule Though I believe some of us definitely have room to improve on the whole community aspect of being part of dA. Not that I don't also, but...some more than others (deviantART not deviantSPACE. Remember that, ppl.)

LUV YOU DEV, STAFF AND DEVIANT FOLK!!!!!!!!!



Hokay, moving on. Where the HELL have I been for the past month and a couple weeks??? Simple. Fucking. No where. If I recall, however, I did submit a couple new photos and a writing work, to show I wasn't completely dead. ...yet. As for this last weekend,I was going to compose a new journal before I left, but procrastination got the... ]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/19134524/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/19134524/ Mon, 30 Jun 2008 19:39:58 PDT uugh...cheezits, merry and joseph ellis. Danggummit. *Sigh* >:#

To do:
-finish my new curtains *FREAKING FINALLY*
-update here
-practice T'ai Chi and MA
-work out
-draw more
-finish my f***ing novel
-learn to skateboard

Wishlist:
-devART subscription (any amazingly kind, wonderful contributers??)
-new bike
-rice steamer
-cash on Gaiaonline.com ^.^
-2 pretty necklaces on Yesstyle.com DDD
-food from Asian Market (pocky, YanYan, panda cookies, etc...)

*Sigh* So yeah. Well, I'll figure something out. Something good'll happen, I'm sure. For now, I'm gonna go try and edit some more and then turn in for the night. Happy Summer and Fourth of July, which is this Friday =] Ja mata ne!!
<3's
Odak-chan
uhmm...

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/18710149/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/18710149/ Sat, 07 Jun 2008 08:00:32 PDT
I promised myself my novel would be finished by the end of sophomore year. Well, not including the weekend I've got three days left of sophomore year and over 400 pages to edit/write. I need to learn to balance my time better... As for having too much time, for the next week, maybe two, I'm gonna be stuck on the couch/bed recuperating from whatever just attacked the nerves and tendons and shit in my lower back Mucho luckiness for me, my dad's a chiropractor (for those who don't know, he's a doctor that treats diseases by manual therapy like spinal adjustment and other joint and soft-tissue manipulation, its an alternative to too much meds and pills and crap, and really does work wonders) so he helped me a lot...This is the third time that's happened to me this week, my lower back, sides and stomach go freaking crazy, I can't sit, stand, lay down, and I puck my guts up every ten minutes. It's a bitch and a half, I'll tell ya XD Yesterday I went to the mall with my friend, got home around four and was cleaning my room, JUST WALKING AROUND AND CLEANING MY ROOM and around 5:30 it came back full force. That's what I'm talking about when I say moments drag on for so long you think you're gonna die...why can't it be reversed? Why can't the good moments last forever and the bad ones just fade away? *sigh* I love life. Life is cynical and cruel THAT'S RIGHT LIFE!!! I SHAKE FISHES AT YOU!! XPPPP

Whateva. So yeah, kinda pissed about that. I'm a really energetic person and I love to move around and work my body and sitting around and doing nothing really doesn't sit well with me...aha, sit. No. But I guess it's for the best, since I really need to catch up on writing. Suppose it does have a good side, right? Trying to be optimistic lol...

Well, summer's basically here except for the last three days of finals, and I'm actually almost done with updating here on dev, YAAAAY!! LoL...Besides that, once again, summer holds a treasure trove of possibilities and opportunities and I just can't wait to dig into them and take it all and give nothin' back hehe, pirates...i freaking love pirates XD PIRATES AND NINJAS!!! bwahaha I'm BOTH!! XDDD Cause I love the sea and I'm a little theiver and I also love martial arts!! ...man that was random

Moving on. I suppose that's it, though. School's good, I'll be passing everything and I promised myself that next year was going to be great, and I was definitely going to work really hard this time, and set the bar higher for all A's, or at least A's and B's. Though geometry might be the exception, 'cause I can't do math to save my life, but I'll work hard!! Also, once I'm better, I'm gonna commit myself totally to becoming the best Martial Artist I can be!! oh yeah baby

Well suppose that's it for now, I'll be updating a lot soon so keep a look out, and tell you're friends, too!! I'll also be sure to update you guys on all the things I'll be doin this summer, but until then, I need to go write, so I shall ttyl. Wishing you all a happy, healthy summer, ja mata... ]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/17931330/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/17931330/ Sat, 19 Apr 2008 17:07:59 PDT So, let's recap...

Last time I left you guys, I'd been having a horrible time in just about everything, and the stress level was so over the top I was getting ready to give up. But I'm okay now...in fact, I'm much better than okay, and it's all thanks to my sisters and mom, who never fail to help me back up after I fall on my ass...repeatedly I actually cranked out a B+ in Algebra on my last report card, which is fucking AMAZING (scuse the language), however I passed french, english and history by the skin of my teeth with D's, and...hopefully with english and french, I can at least keep a C for the last quarter, but otherwise, I am really damn good

So school's pretty okay, I'm pretty okay... This summer is so full of opportunities and possibilities, I can't wait!!! It's going to be positively wonderful We had a college fair the other day at school, and its funny because at first you're very specific, looking for one or two things you really want, but after a while you're like, "Oh what the hell, gimme that one, and this one, just gimme all that shit, I'll take it all!!" XDD I think signed up for like, 15 different newsletters, my parents are gonna get the mail and be like, "...the hell?" XD I still have some major college-research to do, but so far my top two are Moore College of Art and Design and Antonelli Institute. Both are art schools, cause I refuse to go anywhere else Antonelli's only photography, and two hours away from where I live. Moore is all sorts of art, and only one hour. Since I need to stay close to home (will be commuting, no dorms for moi XD) Moore's in the lead right now, especially since it has more than just photography, and even though that'll be my major, I'd still like the chance to minor in the other arts as well

I got my yellow belt in Martial Arts, happy bout that, writing is going well...slowly, but well. Photography is blossoming, just like nature, and I'm getting some great new shots thanks to Spring

Calander:
-38 more days of sophomore year
-9 more days of braces
-11 more days til my birthday

Guys better wish me a happy birthday mark it down!! May 1!!!

So, guess that's it, ja ne, and have a happy,healthy spring!! And no matter what, just keep ooon truckin'
<3's
~Odak-chan
uhmm...

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/16996390/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/16996390/ Thu, 21 Feb 2008 16:28:29 PST yourself anymore. I learned that the hard way recently. It takes more than one person to bare the stress of an average life, and I can only image how much harder it is for the people whose lives are just that much harder, and that's why I try to be there for my friends as much as possible, and because they're always there for me. But sharing and dividing the burden isn't the only way to alleviate the pain. In fact, its only half. You have to control yourself, you're own attitudes, thoughts and actions, because as cliche as it sounds, if you have a good outlook on the day, the day will surely be better. Same with life. Trust me people, I know what I'm talking about.

On a happier note...

My oldest bunny J.J. was uber sick and we thought we might lose him, but he's SO much better now and will hopefully be with us for another ten years

I'm doing a lot better in all my classes, though history is still a major strain. I'm praying and breaking my neck that I pass. Pray for me, guys. I need it

Martial Arts, eh...good, I guess. Want my damn yellow belt. GRAWR!!! But can't get that until my school grades get better, how gay is that??? Ugh...whatev, man. Writing, going well. Photographing...nothing to photograph, its still dead outside. DAMMIT I hate the snow!!! But like I said in my most recent deviation, I've got loads to post and its ALL ready, I just have to find the time to post it...soon guys, soon. I promise I'm just been uber busy with writing and school work lately...graah, I so need a break ><
<---winter blahs
Well, I really think that's it for once I gotta go finish my damn history essay, wish me luck, guys!! I'll try and deviate as SOON as I have a free hour, I PROMISE!!! (but don't hold your breath...)

<3's
~Odak-chan
uhmm...

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/16256233/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/16256233/ Fri, 04 Jan 2008 14:06:05 PST
Wowzers I haven't journaled since Halloween >< sorry bout the procrastinating guys, there's no excuse for it. I've had all the time in the world to update and journal and such, I've just been a lazy butt. Truth is, every time I decided I would do one of those things I literally felt sick to my stomach and continued to put everything off. Have no clue why, but I have been feeling a bit down since the holidays and I so wanted to submit something for Christmas and the New Years too!!! Grr...well, better luck next year, right?

Schools a bitch, like usual. I am guyless, which really sucks when I'm feeling a bit...well you know, during school dances and such. But then I found an uber cute Asian guy and..."danced" (hehehe...) with him for bit hehe...
Not quite failing anything yet, but I'm only passing a few classes by the skin of my teeth (mostly D's) and that's not much better, but at least I'm passing at all...oh well, I'm workin on it best to my ability, really

Writing and photography are great, I just need to update lol XD and surprisingly enough, I'm actually making a dent in my personal To-do list, which makes me very happy lol, and also means surprises for you guys and my bestest budd Kelly. Kell hun, if you read this, I love you so much and please don't give up. You'll get better, I promise, it's just a severe case of writer's block, happened to me a few times to (and not just the regular writer's block, i mean too) I'm getting something finished up that will hopefully spark your inspiration again, just hang in there hun, you'll be fine, I promise. And I don't care what you say, your talent is NOT inferior to mine so shove it

Oh yeah!! Martial Arts is going great too, so thankful for that lol.

Tragedy has struck. I broke my laptop *sobs uncontrollably* Hoping to get a new one soon but that doesn't look probable

Other than feeling a bit down from time to time and the death of my laptop, I'm doin okay for now. Hangin in there. 106 more days of sophomore year. Get my braces off in March. Haaaalelujah hehe

*Takes deep breath* Hokay, well ~Scsii (Alisha) has made it quite clear that I am way past due for an devious update hehehe so I will bring this entry to a close momentarily and get right to that so she can stop hounding me hehhe

I wanna thank all you guys for the support you've given me here on dev. I've found new people who constantly keep me inspired and offer kind words that help me trudge on when I get discouraged. Of course, my sisters are the ones who deserve the most thanks, as always and forever they are more important to me than my own life and I love them with undying sisterly love. Who says you need blood to be sisters? We're more than that, those guys are my life. I'd sincerely die without you all. ...Alyssa and I just need to stop fight over guys XD

Much Love,
's
~Odak-chan
uhmm...

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/15290991/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/15290991/ Tue, 30 Oct 2007 17:49:29 PDT cause I've got at least five truckloads of photos AAAAND prose ( )just WAITING to see the light of Deviant lolz...tomorrow's Halloween and this weekend I've got Martial Arts and am going to my first out-of-school PARTY party (alcohol, fire, guys...the whole nine yards) on Saturday so I can't guarantee anything until NEXT Thursday, cause I've been blessed with a three day week of school next week HAAALELUJAAAAH!!!

So...yeah, some shit's been goin on...I'm doing very poorly in school right now, so my ass is in hot water there...out of school, I still have nothing to look forward too...writing, photography, martial arts, ska8bording (lol I'm a loswer...oh great typo. whatever I'm keeping it) has all been pushed aside for school, which is literally scrapping me brain raw...if I even have a brain...mm hmm...

Nothings been going my way lately, and I seem to have fallen into another funk of "I HATE EVERYTHING." But I refuse to be a little bitch and blame everyone else (well, that's ONE good thing about me), so I will first acknowledge the fact that my life is absolutely wonderful, I could not ask for anything more and I'm thankful for everyone and everything in my life. Now then, what's the problem, you ask? Simple. Me. I'M the problem in my own life...if that makes ANY sense at all. I won't go into detail, you don't wanna hear about it anyway lol

So...yeah...look forward to some new photos and prose, mostly composed by myself but some co-written with some buddies of mine... I just wanted to update for ya'll real fast, but I gotta go finish math hw and look over History a bit...oh wait I can't, Alyssa has my notes...okay, math it is, then sleep theeeen...

MWAHAHAHHAAAA!!! CAAAANDDEEEEE!!!!

Love,
Odak-chan
uhmm...

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/14476719/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/14476719/ Mon, 03 Sep 2007 18:14:27 PDT
Most of all I hope that poor Lala's, xXSaruNinjaXx, world will get better...its not fair to her, its just not fair...things'll get better, I now it, but they need to get better really SOON...

Oddly enough, everything feels pretty normal...for me, anyway. I've only got a slight feeling of anxiety, which will probably grow in the morning and when I actually reach the school, but will probably settle once I see my friends lol... I keep picturing myself at school, and it looks and feels right...even better...than last year, I mean. So much has changed over the last half of freshman year, and the summer. I feel, for the most part, that I've found myself, and I've lost that fear of...whatever it was, that irrational fear of not being able to express myself, maybe...of not being accepted? Well, for once and for always I've figured out how to not care about that. This is me, World, like it or not. Truthfully, I almost want to get out there and show the whole damn world...okay, maybe that's going a little far.

I act brave, I do my best to not care, but sometimes that "girl next door" aspect of my life seems overwhelming, like I can be nothing more than the main character's best friend. ...Okay, maybe that's not completely true, cause you're always the main character in your own life...but...you get what I mean

Anyhoo, I know if I just keep my cool, do what feels right and what I know is right and just keep...being myself, it'll be a hell of a lot better than last year, that's for SURE

This is me, World...better watch out.

Ja mata ne!!
Aishiteru~
~.Kirri-chan.~
uhmm...

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/14065916/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/14065916/ Tue, 07 Aug 2007 20:23:55 PDT
Just wanted to post a new journal causea the occasion--HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DEVIANTART!!! WE LUV YA!!!
:deviantlove:

Aah...emoticons have got to be one of the most brilliant things ever made...next to toilet paper

So...tired...*zzz...* I don't even...want to finish this entry...I'm bored...and tired...and you know, I'm probably not even tired from the physical things I did today, more so all the thinking I've done...if that's even possible lol...

I've been thinking so much lately, about the future...for the longest time now, my secret dream has been to be able to get my book published, and with that money, save my house and my woods when my parents move, which is what they're planning to do when I'm done highschool...if I'm lucky, they'll wait until my sister's out of high school as well; she'll be a freshman when I'm a senior... Anyway, my friend Monica just told me the other day that she didn't want to move either, and she hoped that when her parents moved, they'd give the house to her (obviously, she'd be 18 by then). I was shocked and relieved at that, and prayed to God that my parents would be willing enough to do that for me too...

So many ideas floating around for that...what jobs I would have by then to keep up the mortage and shit, how I could turn my dad's home office into a place to rent out to college students and such...God...then, just today, I went shopping at CVS with my mom, and all the worries of money and what I would go and buy and stuff weekly at the supermarket and things like that just randomly started floating through my head...

And jobs? I've got many now that I'd love to do...author, photographer, perhaps even part-time martial arts instructor...haha oh God...I know, I know, its all so...blasphomous, unrealistic...but I can't help those crazy mental-popups lol...Lalaaa haha...

I'm torn...between today and tomorrow, so to speak. So much as to be focused on the now, and yet again, so much as to be spent preparing for the later...which do you commit yourself to first? As the later, all I've mostly got are thoughts...though, for the "jobs" I'd like to do, I'm slowly making building blocks for...I've almost finished my book, and just found out the other day that one of my dad's patients is the head of a small publishing company..; my photography is only flurishing, thanks to deviant, and one day I'll convince my mother to let my sell prints...(she still doesn't even know I have an account on here lolz...); and as for martial arts...its the love of my life.

I was working on that today, actually, my martial arts and tricking skillz...by tricking, I mean acrobatics and shit, though so far I know VERY little lol... Its a new passion, and I simply cannot wait to get better. I'm taking every precaution there is to garatee success in this...I'm starting from the very beginnings, so I don't screw up, and I'm putting my whole heart into it...its a dream. And you know how I am about dreams, I have to make them come true no matter WHAT
... ]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/13487856/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/13487856/ Mon, 25 Jun 2007 16:33:03 PDT
As of today its been exactly two weeks since school let out. Remarkably, I passed every final exam (if only by the skin of my teeth...) and got a mixture of A's, B's and C's on my last report card. For me, pretty damn good and MORE than enough reason to celebrate. Maybe not officially, but I am now a sophmore no more freshmeat!!! Hehehe...

Well, on the first Saturday of Summer--the day after school let out--I drastically changed my appearance by getting my hair cut all the way up to my jaw line and getting side-swept bangs. I must admit, it looks rather gorgeous Maybe I'll post a pic later, dunno...

Anyhoo, the guys must like my new haircut too, because in the last two weeks I've been checked out and hit on by 5 guys A course, I'm a little ham and soak it all up mwahaha...

The first was hours after I got my hair cut, when I stopped at Lindy Hopp's for an ice cream cake for my friend's birthday. The dude was pretty cute hehe he was on his cell and kept lookin up every three seconds lmao...

Then I went to Borders a few days later. This guy, pretty damn cute, musta been 16 or 17, walks by me and takes an exaggerated double-take before leavin the isle of books. My mom comes up to me all smug and smirking and goes, "Hehehe *evil snicker* That guy was checkin you out..." I stood there dumbfounded for like, five minutes lol then I stalked off to the music section and caught the guy out the corner of my eye staring at me. Every time I turned to look at him he'd quickly look away, embarrassed. Best part of that little incident was that I later saw him leaving the cafe section, hand in hand with his GIRLFRIEND

Last three occured last Friday, when I went to the mall with my best friends Alyssa and Nicole. First time without parents for me. Was I the happiest little midge ever?!?! HELL YESS!!!!!!! Mwahahahahaaa...

I'll elaborate on our insane shopping, crazy-dress-trying-on antics later (lmao) but for now, the guys. Lmao. Two were Asian. One had a Scottish accent. lmao. Hmm...well, the first Asian dude over-exaggeratedly wanted to help me find some video game, while Nicole insisted that any other time she came to that store, the people who worked there NEVER offered to help. I noted that he was only talking to me, too. (MAN was he hawt...aaaargh...)
http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/13154387/ Wed, 30 May 2007 17:32:01 PDT

Hmm...let's start from where we left off, shall we?...oh right, my b-day...well, my friends made it special for me and that's what counts! About four days later my mom finally found time to give me my gifties lol and I got the night of, so...lol yeah ^ ^;

Since then, I've been a little less...myself. Over the past month (May), I starded feeling horrible again, pretty much about everything. I started letting myself think again that my dreams would never come true, I started putting myself down again and things with the hawt guy (Mark) just kept getting worse. THEN, oh GAWD, I got my bottom braces on, and since they did such a shitty job, one of the brackets popped all the way off and the mean little voice in the back of my head convinced the poor little inocent side that I looked like a hockey player with a missing tooth, only it was with my braces lol...and I partially did hehehe
Needless to say, I was not very happy

Wellp...I don't know what turned it around, but eventually I got back on my feet

I picked up my pen and paper and started writing again (after a looooong "vacation" lol) and the novel my friend Kelly and I are writing is once again underway

Been getting so freakin AWESOME shots lately, specially since mom's had the sprinkler on and the blooming flowers get all wet with dew hehehehe...will post soon, promise

Hmm...school...well, everythings goin pretty well, if I do say so myself...finals are right around the corner so I've barely had time to do anything lol BUT I've still managed to fit in exercising!!! WOOT WOOT!!!

Last Sunday, I ran THREE FREAKIN MILES MWAHAHAHAHAHA...but then I felt fat and lazy cause I didn't do anything Monday hehe...Tuesday, yesterday, I did 2 miles and today I did 2...lol, yes I'm sweaty and nasty-smelling while eating some saladish-thingy for dinner...that just...fell on the floor CHOKUSO!!! Brb, need paper towels....

Back. Spill cleaneded. Continueing.

AAAAANYhoo...running. yes. I been runnin bunches lately, STILL attempting to get rid of that nasty fat...hehehe and I must say, I'm well on my way. If I didn't suck my stomach in and you just looked at it, you'd sw... ]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/12806612/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/12806612/ Tue, 01 May 2007 17:36:04 PDT Happee birthday to mweeeee!!!!! *dances* WEeeeeeeeee hehehe...

Wellp, today was pretty darn good...cept for the damn bird that woke me up an hour before my alarm lol...I got to school and ppl glomped me and poked me and my friends murdered my locker with decorations hehe...twas fun. Got a shit load of hw though and have yet to celebrate How RUDE of my stupid teachers...

My mothers being a bitch, my sisters being annoying and my dad is being...weird. None have really acknowledged the day for what it is and its kind of made me a little dissapointed...

...AHHH FUCK THEM!!! THE HAWT GUY AT SCHOOL GAVE ME A BIRTHDAY HUG THAT WAS THE BEST PRESENT EVER!!!!!! WHY SHOULD I CARE ABOUT MY STUPID FAMILY!!!! *waves hand in air nonchalantly while laughing too forcedly* AHA!! HAHAHA!!! HA!!! HAAAA...

...ah fuck. I hate this house lol I WANT CAKE AND PRESENTS DAMMIT ALL!!! Lol...I KNOW okaa-san bought my favorite chocolate icecream cake...least I think she did...I looked in the fridge and there was a white box but--TOO FUCKING SHORT TO REACH so I can't be sure but...*siiiiigh* Ah well...

Oh yeah...got HORRIBLE sunburn yesterday ugh gawd it hurts like a BITCH MY SHOULDERS AAAAAAAAAAAH

Hmmm....well, tis eight twenty and everybody's still ignoring me...guess I'll juss have to have ma own little party
*sets up single candle and stolen tastey cakes* HAPPEE (yes i know i spelled that wrong, its MY... ]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/12555672/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/12555672/ Wed, 11 Apr 2007 15:37:45 PDT Hey ya'll, me again. Was moping around, noticed I hadn't written since St. Patty's day so decided to update...lol I know I don't do that much but...eh. And I know I need to add more pictures but I've been lazy about that too lol gomen...

*sigh* what to do what to do...I've been really...free spirited lately, and I must admit I'm getting so much better at not giving a rat's ass about what people think of me. I dress as cute and chic and stylish as I possibly can, especially since I'm into that kind of thing and I just love being different and putting togther things no one else would think of...but the only drawback now is..."the pretty factor." I've asked a lot of my close friends time and again if I'm pretty or cute, and everytime they say yes and...I look in the mirror and I love to think that I am pretty, but I can't help but think that that may only be because, ya know, its my face and I've lived with it forever so I'm kinda used to it...I know it kind of contridicts what I said ealier about not caring what ppl think, but sometimes I wonder if, when I look in the mirror and see someone somewhat pretty, if other ppl, when they look at me, see the same...

Argh, its ridiculous I know but...*shrug* I'll figure it out eventually...

Sooo...along with trying to be the free-spirited, hyperactive, cutie girl among my peers and friends, I'm also gonna be...*dramatic music&lighting as I turn around in chibi form with naruto headband on forehead* A NINJAAAAAAAA!!!!!! weeeeeehehehheeh...

No, seriously, I am. I've been training since...eh...late...february, doing crunches every night and morning, and recently got into a very strict work out scedual that will hopefully result in a rockin body by bikini season Though I only weigh 83 pounds and, I admit, am rather skinny, I want that extra jelly belly baby fat (that, coincidently, no one else seems to see...>_< GONE so I can have a REAL flat stomach lol...

But in all seriousness, my bestest tomo (one of, anyway) Lala (Alyssa, Lalami...you should all know her as the most popular model on my page hehe) are gonna officially join a dojo and overtime become kick ass ninjas!! MWAHAHAHA!!!! We even decided on a name--KANS. Kick Ass Ninja Sisters!! MWAAAAHAHAHA!! I came up with it teehee so clever, iya? http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/12217281/ Sat, 17 Mar 2007 09:30:38 PDT


WAAAAAAAAAHOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! *dances dublin pub dance*
HAPPY ST. PATTY'S DAY EVERYBODYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!! WEEEEE
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

In case ya haven't already noticed, I am VERY hyper rightnow-
-and very green!!!! Got ma shamrock sockies... ]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11922911/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11922911/ Thu, 22 Feb 2007 14:53:42 PST
Anyhoo...

Uh oh, I feel laughing fit arising...hehe those are fun. My random high-moments-off-of-life, lol... NO I don't to drugs, I'm too much of scardy cat to do any of that shit (which is probably a good thing...), no I get high off of climbing trees and life in general--the best and cheapest kinds of highs

Hmm...ASJDFLKADSFJS I SMELL YUMMY DINNERRRRRRR!!!! WOOT!!! But...ugh...nasty calories...well, just gonna have ta do extra crunches tonight

Okay, I know I'm blabbering and no one cares what I've got to say so I guess I'm gonna go... BUT WHAT WILL I DO?!?!?! ...Fine. Edit. Nyaaah I HATE EDITIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!!!!!!!!

<3
~Kirri-chan

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11858521/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11858521/ Sat, 17 Feb 2007 18:02:31 PST
Ugh. Yeah. Anyone wonderin about the title of this entry? Haha...weeeell if anyone's been keeping up with xXSaruNinjaXx and xXGedweyIgnasia501Xx's recent deviations, the Ice Island we've all been crazy about latey was the cause of it, lol. Or rather...my klutziness. Kirsten-ism, by the way, hehe...

So aaaaanyhoo, we were messin around, takin pics, and I was like, "Hey guys, hold my camera while I climb up here!" I start to climb onto the ice and then BOOM I slip, fall, slide and lay, stunned, on my back. Then I fly up and clutch my knee, which feels like its on fire, and Nicole goes, "Kirri, you're bleeding!" I look at my hand and uh, EW. Blood.

Yeah.
And all for the sake of photography.

Well, just goes to show how retarded I am really, lol. I've got a nice scar on my hand and my knee looks like something off the butcher's table--black and blue on the outside and pink as fresh meat in the middle of my kneecap haha... Cept stairs are rather painful and it’s a little tricky typing with bandages on my fingers...hehe...Seriously though, I have no clue how I managed to cut myself seeing as all the ice was SMOOTH *sweatdrop*

Yeah so...who knew photography was so dangerous? Haha...
Speaking of which, I almost commited suicide the other day.
...By trying to convince myself that I was never going to write again.

While I'm still a little iffy on the subject and have yet to build up the nerves to tackle my story again, after a slightly violent lecture from Lala-san and reading a book called Writing Magic by Gail Carson Levine, I've felt recently that at least HALF of the giant boulder that's been crushing my delicate spirits has been lifted off my chest, and for now, that's as good as anything hehe.

I greatly recommend the 161 page book by Mrs. Carson to anyone with writer's block, needs help starting/finishing/writing a book/poem/anything-writing-related, because it not only offers excellent advise, it shows you how to keep writing, gives great starting ideas and is an brilliant source of inspiration. Mrs. Carson definitely knows what she's talking about and it helped me so much.

Ugh. OOOMG...a few hours ago I got back from watching Bridge to Terrabithia (sp? gomen!!) with my oneesama, Kelly. Holy crap, we were BOTH sobbing at the end, lol, she stole my tissues...
And it was horrible cause this little kid in the audiance started sobbing, which totally set me off, especially after the main character started crying, then this little kid a few seats away from us, in the most adorable little-kid-voice, goes, "Mommy, why did she diiiee?" I was like "STFU YOU'RE KILLIN ME!!!"

*Sigh* Ah well... I guess I'm gonna go read more of Writing Magic, since I haven't finished yet...TTYL, I'll try to update more often, hehe SAYONARAAAAA!!!
<3
~Kirri-chan

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11533067/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11533067/ Mon, 22 Jan 2007 17:23:22 PST _<

Anyway...yeah...I've multiple things thrown at me today. This morning going to school, my okaa-chan thought it would great to throw snow at me. In english, Brietzman threw a note pad at me so I took it. Mwahaha. Ooo...then I threw a stick at Nicole and she turned around and it hit her RIGHT on the nose. I died. Most of the snow melted, so she and I went all the way down my neighbors driveway (which is right on the side of my house, I'll have to post a pic for you guys) and ran all the way back up, jumping in every puddle we could find. Mwahaha. We were so soaked by the time we got into the house, I couldn't feel my legs...

Supposed to be studying history...I've got an F in that class and the mid term test on it is tomorrow...but I also need to write out my science note card (which I was kinda doin but then decided to update my deviant journal) cause I have an F in that class too... lol. I'm not the smartest person in the world.

Welp...I'm gonna go post some pics real fast and get back to work...lol Sayonara!!
~Kirri-chan

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11440309/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11440309/ Sun, 14 Jan 2007 21:05:20 PST
To make things worse, my ex just made fun of me for crying (it was UBER sad, believe me), saying I had "emotional episodes." Pft. What a fag. Now I remember why I broke up with him in the first place.

Anyhoo, I'm gonna post pics of my beautiful little puppies in honor of the awesome Wolf's Rain characters.

Wolf's Rain woofs (maria!!!):

Kiba, da white one
Tsume, da grey one
Hige, da brownish one
Blue, da black one with GORGEOUS eyes
Toboe, ma fav, other brownish one. I LOVE HIM. HES ADORABLE.

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11401630/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11401630/ Thu, 11 Jan 2007 17:38:10 PST The trees are gorgeous and fanciful with vines so thick they seem like tree branches but they curl and twist in the most amazing and bizarre ways. During the summer season especially, when everything is green and flourishing, it’s like stepping into a tropical forest found only in far-off lands. ...I should post pictures so you guys can see what's going to be destroyed in a year or so...
I've got a dream...an idea...this novel I'm co-writing with my best friend Kelly...300 some pages so far, we're not even close to being done...if...if I could get it published...and...if it...became...a huge hit...then...I could use that money...and save the land...
Its my dream...and yet I feel horrible for thinking it in the first place. Christopher Paolini (author of Eragon) NEEDED that money. His family didn’t even always have dinner on the table! And HE has some real talent and skill…a 601 page book at FIFTEEN? I mean seriously…first of all, how can I ever hope to compete with that, and second of all…how DARE I want what he has! I have everything I want and yet it’s still not enough? Well…not enough in the real world, anyway…
And, that too...if the book thing doesn't work out...I have no idea how I'll make it in life. ...I like to think I'm a good writer, but I can't help but feel that Kelly's the one keeping the book together... Failing school, weighed down so heavily by empty dreams and out of control ambitions...god...what am I going to do?

I wish someone would follow me into the dark.

]]> ~xXOdakotaXx http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11340939/ http://xXOdakotaXx.deviantart.com/journal/11340939/ Sat, 06 Jan 2007 18:28:25 PST
]]> ~xXOdakotaXx