http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:xary&section=today deviantART RSS for by:xary en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sun, 06 Dec 2009 06:13:34 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/22879892/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/22879892/ Thu, 29 Jan 2009 06:17:48 PST his turn and no easier sorrow. he will remain with us, under the fig tree (his favourite). the pillow-pouf which he wore ad nauseam for rest and dreams won't have much use for now. and even if a new friend comes along, to heal the sad emptyness that he left behind, things will be strange for a while. but every day a little bit better. or so i hope.

old in age but puppy at heart, cuddles forever.



(2000-2009)

]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/22736409/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/22736409/ Thu, 22 Jan 2009 14:24:50 PST
it's about time to turn the page and... think of new choices. hopes. dreams. and everything more a person is entitled to.

i know i still Am.

]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/15811971/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/15811971/ Wed, 05 Dec 2007 18:17:10 PST
no love. no more. for us two together.

in some other path, with somebody else, who knows. perhaps.

]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/14532186/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/14532186/ Fri, 07 Sep 2007 15:01:54 PDT
much, much better.


(i was lost and you found me. once more.
4 years. for life.)

]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/11362367/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/11362367/ Mon, 08 Jan 2007 12:59:01 PST not even sure it can take me where i want to go and who i want to be.

damn it.

]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/10109168/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/10109168/ Mon, 18 Sep 2006 07:52:25 PDT at all. not even a fibre twinkling with hope. but here you are. still. you are here still.

med school for you, hooray (two years after your first try, congratulations. you deserved it from day one and now you finally got it. such a bittersweet prize.)

♥ ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/9798361/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/9798361/ Sun, 20 Aug 2006 22:09:12 PDT

i guess things are better. we kind of sorted things out towards the end. we are more aware now that 'keeping alive' such a group of people together might sometimes offer hard work but is worth it.

looking back, this year has been successfull in terms of reading. i wish i could have read more but still i read a lot, more than i used to some years ago. such a crap i was back then. gave up on dancing, gave up on reading - what the hell was i thinking? dancing is still THE thing i miss the most and at the same time what i dread the most when i'm given to think about coming back. but that is another topic...

some changes are going to take place in the future. prague seems the place-to-be for you. honestly i do not know how i am supposed to deal with all of it because it seems so out of place (contradictory to what i said before but whatever) and at the same time so here. so now. now as in september. now as in for the next six years. * silence *

yup.

and another school year is about begin. two more years to go until graduation and then me and some college friends can put our dream-machine to work for a bookstore of our own. haha i just laugh out loud when i think about it. it would be nice though. very nice. ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/7913188/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/7913188/ Thu, 16 Feb 2006 05:48:53 PST
yesterday i found out i had passed all my exams. first time that happens for me (at college). felt good about myself. the semester hadn't been one of the best but the grades rewarded other aspects. and maybe the next one will be better. at least i feel it can be

yesterday my dear portable computer crashed. it all started with a strange sound like in nails-scratching-board. now when i turn it on a warning comes in: no hard disk found. that can't be good and the best part is, i have nothing backed up. amazing, right? i said i deserved it, didn't i?

oh well, now it's pc clinic time for it.

(be strong, dear ^^) ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/7395834/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/7395834/ Fri, 23 Dec 2005 19:45:50 PST

May you Spend this couple of days the way you find most fit.


Be cheerful, be hopeful, be nostalgic. Be in some kind of mood filled with union and joy


And don't forget New Year

]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/7223143/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/7223143/ Sun, 04 Dec 2005 18:35:46 PST great company this saturday. erasing some of the setbacks, everything went pretty smooth and i guess we found a manage to have fun. loved every single moment with all of you: the laughs, the smiles, the hugs, the talks, the jokes, the moves, the songs, the surprises, the empathy.

she loved the surprise gift, i mean, the private show and the puzzle hehe

just liked you said, twin, two years ago we didn't know each other and now it's this... this unbelievable love that joined us together. i feel blessed when i'm with you guys

and now i will try to get some sleep cause going to bed at 7 in the morning is definitely no life for me. the garfield in me is killing for his thrill -- sleep.

nighty night ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/7192784/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/7192784/ Thu, 01 Dec 2005 08:40:11 PST strange monday. mixed feelings. same thoughts all over again. some ghosts seem to want to live through every person i know. you. always you.

thank dog for the holiday today. time for us two maybe? missing you, love.

nice weekend ahead. two days of fun, laughter, bonding, happy tears probably, dancing till we drop. i'm so thrilled about what we have in store for those days. so happy for being able to share it all with you. actually, without you guys things wouldn't be possible.

LET'S ROCK! ^^

[very anxious to see the outcome of all our efforts. our little secrets to your own amusement. hope you like it, babe ] ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6919931/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6919931/ Mon, 31 Oct 2005 19:46:33 PST i'm feeling so amèlie this week.

wish i had a red-with-white-dots umbrella, shoes that seem some sizes too big, only red and black clothes, a funky haircut. the sun shining through my smile. a peaceful look. silence. quietness in all my gestures and actions.

i have to watch the film one more time. missing her figure once again.

[you're my nino; found you again. followed the arrows. tore away the mask. you're my nino. again.] ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6811694/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6811694/ Wed, 19 Oct 2005 17:01:38 PDT 2 years and six months. of love. of care. of friendship - well, no, actually that is more than 2 years and a half. of laughter. of support. of tenderness. of emotion.

we've come so far from that time. we've grown, specially together. and it's been nice to have you around. for everything. and nothing at all.

you very very much pooky. always will, no matter what. i know it sounds a bit cliché but it's the truth. it's all that i can give you and that you deserve. you're a kind, wonderful man. i feel blessed to have you in my life. as a best friend and as a lover. as everything you and i are to/with each other.

you're my wonderwall ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6721724/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6721724/ Sun, 09 Oct 2005 14:18:37 PDT rain is finally here. time is getting ready for hot chocolate, scarfs, gloves, cold and reddish noses, firewoods lit up all night.
rain is finally here and i am ready to get warmed up in your arms. with the rain pouring outside, setting the rhythm of our sweet lovesong. ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6674061/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6674061/ Tue, 04 Oct 2005 00:06:30 PDT insomnia the night before. this night i went to bed at 10pm and slept like a baby. felt sooo good

i wish i could be sleeping still but oh well... to college i must go. ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6660352/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6660352/ Sun, 02 Oct 2005 14:14:06 PDT

<sub>i have loads of books to read. some for college, others for my own amusement. the list is long, they pile up in my room's floor. i have a bookcase but it isn't enough. and i kinda like them lying around.
last night i (finally) finished One Man's Bible by Gao Xingjian. my problem is that i tend to read many books at once and so i take a long time to finish them. but some grasp me so unexpectadly that i can't read anything else. one man's bible wasn't one of them, but it was fine. i enjoyed some of the chapters. others were difficult to understand, maybe because they portrayed a culture and moment in time so different from mine. some years later i might give it another try.

so now i have more 3 books to continue reading and another one has been added to that list (the List in the Main List): The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera. unbearable? you got that right. don't know why but something tells me i'm going to be absorbed by this book...</sub> ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6647966/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6647966/ Sat, 01 Oct 2005 04:01:23 PDT and a new brain. ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6636110/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6636110/ Thu, 29 Sep 2005 17:02:32 PDT
there are still thoughtful people in this world. thank them for that. ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6584685/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6584685/ Fri, 23 Sep 2005 19:36:08 PDT
today i feel hopelessly tired. my emotions are shattered and my thoughts have been killed in a blink of an eye. suddenly i had nothing to hold on to. and all that crappy mumbo jambo, that stupid bullshit, clinging to every corner of my soul.

oh fuck it. if nobody cares why should i? not today i won't.

going to bed now ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6575563/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6575563/ Thu, 22 Sep 2005 18:09:11 PDT já fugi de ti, sabes? há muito tempo atrás. o amor era tanto que tornei-me sufocante. amei-te demais, não soube estabelecer limites. mas não estava fatalmente cega de tudo, ainda me restava alguma noção. e o afastamento foi decisão minha. agora peço-te, afasta-te também.
não aguento o teu sorriso, a tua pele escaldando a minha, o toque que me provoca o amor já morto, insistindo no seu regresso à vida. não aguento o teu desejo, o teu beijo capaz de viciar, não te aguento, não te quero, não. já gritei ao meu coração que não te quero.

[no reality added. plain fiction.]

= [link] = ]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6566360/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6566360/ Thu, 22 Sep 2005 12:00:01 PDT
]]> ~xary http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6565944/ http://xary.deviantart.com/journal/6565944/ Wed, 21 Sep 2005 17:34:56 PDT i tend to feel divided: i want to see my friends there, laugh and talk with them, spend some quality time with them but the other side of me wants to stay in bed, read a book, curl up in myself...

oh well. just hope next week it will be different. i wake up on time and nothing brings me down. i miss fall. the greyish sky and the mist that would be with us for an entire day. enough with the sun already...

* ]]> ~xary