http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:yorukami&section=today deviantART RSS for by:yorukami en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Mon, 21 Dec 2009 17:21:59 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/29087112/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/29087112/ Mon, 21 Dec 2009 15:26:38 PST

Definitely going to be on my shelf as soon as it hits DVD (because I think Blue Ray is an unnecessary extravagance when I can't fucking see with my own eyes well anyway)

But oh, my, god. I really did enjoy this movie a lot. I couldn't help thinking about the line, "I had a dream I was flying" about something or other, in the real real beginning, before you even see what Jack Sully looks like.

I mean - just - even if the plot has the same time honored cliches, and there aren't very many twists at all (and it could have used a few), really, the movie was more about the people, the Na'vi, and another slap in the face by tree-hugging movie producers about the dangers of using up our limited natural resources. As if we didn't already know that.

And yet we're completely willing to expend ridiculous amounts of resources to drive to a theatre and go see a movie about it.... HRM.

At any rate, the visual aesthetic was definitely there. I intended to go in with "oh god I hope this doesn't suck or I'm gonna be REAAAAALLY pissed", but I went with my bf, so we enjoyed it together. It was the first movie we'd gone to in awhile where neither of had gone to see it before. So it was feckin' awesome. I wasn't really disappointed, once I went in knowing what the movie was and wasn't going to be.

It was not:

A blow-up smash-all deathfest involving blue aliens. A blow-up, smash-up deathfest involving giant blue smurfs in a giant jungle. It is not a thrill ride from end to finish.
You must allow yourself to be immersed from the very start, or you'll sit there staring at the bits barely covered by little loin cloths and blue alien boobies barely covered by VINES
I'm telling you though. Shit DOES blow up, but you'll feel like SHIT.
And they really try... TOO HARD - to make the villains evil. It's like they're pointing a giant "BASTARDS" sign at them, like we didn't exactly get it that they were bad from the start.. what are we, toddlers? we've never seen a movie with bad guys in it before?? It was almost completely juvenile, the way they portrayed the bad guys.

All in all, I liked it.
But everyone's entitled to their opinions.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/29085328/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/29085328/ Mon, 21 Dec 2009 14:10:09 PST
*Sighs...thinking about making Christmas cards... but can't be bothered. Just... too tired and sad already*

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28955334/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28955334/ Tue, 15 Dec 2009 04:41:42 PST
When the man came to install my internet, he stank of marijuana.

Does everyone in this fucking world do some kind of drug or another? I'm *really* not pleased.

He did a good job. But he came half an hour early, around 10:30 (I was in a compromising situation with my bf over and all, was not expecting him till 11), got the job done around 11, and took my money with a happy smile. I was pissed off because I had to go into work anyway, late, and ..uggghhhh.... yesterday was a nice day for me, though, 'cause Kir stayed and hung out and it was great.

I MISSED HOUSE. WHY? DONT ASK.

I WAS WEARING MY "IT'S LUPUS." SHIRT AND EVERYTHING.

NGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

it was a xmas special

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28937564/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28937564/ Mon, 14 Dec 2009 08:16:56 PST _> But I'm not complaining. I'm here, at my own place, and doing my internet thing.

I'm just annoyed 'cause it's eleven and I could still go to work if I want to... I'll just call and ask, 'cause I don't want to miss a day.
Umm, I called in, so now I gotta go. Okay? Bye.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28803483/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28803483/ Mon, 07 Dec 2009 10:55:28 PST
The final boss fight (which is the only way I can describe it as such) is epic.

GO SEE.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28418556/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28418556/ Tue, 17 Nov 2009 16:58:28 PST 's SEEKRIT SANTY, I want to let you know, I want someone to draw a picture of Cotton. >3 ya'll can find him in my gallery. If you want to draw something more suitable to your style, draw Gun Totin Freak guy. Because he's awesome. >_>

I am moving into Red Maple Apartments. GO MEEEE

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28389551/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28389551/ Mon, 16 Nov 2009 07:01:09 PST
WOOOOOOOOO

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28307587/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28307587/ Thu, 12 Nov 2009 06:08:11 PST
pictures to come. Maybe. If I feel like it. Ugh... *Expatorates some more phlegm* GOD WILL IT EVER END?

I miss hanging with the Kirface. I think I will arrange to do so... but wants to hang out wiff me too. So I dunno how dis is all gonna work out...

I'll find a way. I always do!

Bye, everyone!

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28193365/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28193365/ Sat, 07 Nov 2009 07:56:40 PST I HAVE LOST MY FUCKING MIND
I NEED TO STOP TALKING TO MY DUMBASS EX. UGH

And stop listening to this song, Zydrate Anatomy. As well as songs by Zombie Girl. AWESOMEFUCKINSAUCE

Drawing more of Gun Totin' Freak. Go check him out. Gonna find a scanner somewhere and post him up nice. He looks like Alucard/jack Frost. It's great... oh no...

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28119840/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/28119840/ Tue, 03 Nov 2009 06:31:14 PST
But I'm feeling better. As long as I don't go to sleep. Because sleeping sucks when you wake up and you have to hack up a lung every morning. I threw up like, twice today. But I'm still going to work!! Yay!!

So I've posted a bunch of pictures on here, and even more on my facebook account.

*Does a little dance* Tonight I'm gonna cuddle with my boyo and watch a scary movie in honor of our missed Halloween dating thing. At least that's how I want to look at it.

I LOVE YOU BEBE!!! *Snuggles her ol' man*

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27972681/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27972681/ Mon, 26 Oct 2009 06:12:19 PDT
Lots of them.

*Work work work... THEN BAKU-CON WOOOOOOOO*

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27884043/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27884043/ Wed, 21 Oct 2009 06:21:36 PDT , I have your Lamb of God t-shirt on my person. Come to work to pick it up at some point or something. Or I'll bring it to you.

It's clean and folded

And ummm....

I'm hungry.... .... *sighs*

I HATE YOU BK. WHY DID YOU MAKE DOUBLE CHEESEBURGERS ONLY A DOLLAR? UGGHH LIKE WE NEED TO BE MORE BUSY!

I do not envy the burger-making folks at my job. poor Evie...

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27866985/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27866985/ Tue, 20 Oct 2009 06:24:05 PDT
more goddamn pointless appointments
and then to be told I am now on the highly esteemed month or several month-long waiting list
for a goddamn apartment
I must engage in my own search. I mustn't let that other prick let me down...

I mean it when I say I want to find an apartment.... and get out of this place.
I just found out for sure that one of my neighbors shoots up. Another neighbor does pills. And not so very far away, someone in apartment answered the door with a gun in his waistband. This is all nice to write about... but it scares the shit out of me.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27811208/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27811208/ Sat, 17 Oct 2009 07:37:46 PDT yesterday... it was nice to see a familiar face. Jeez, his hair got LONG. XD And he's lost a bit of weight, and I was glad to talk to him, watch Zero Punctuation stuff, then hurry off to work. It was exhausting. Why are Fridays always like that?

Umm... Bleh. No news is good news, I guess?

*runs*

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27775603/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27775603/ Thu, 15 Oct 2009 06:54:15 PDT The sky is over

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27757287/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27757287/ Wed, 14 Oct 2009 05:38:11 PDT
That shit seriously messed with my head. But so is this cold. I'm coughing and phlegmy. God. I guess it was a cold waiting to happen, that sore throat and... stuff...

Man, I was really shitty yesterday. I didn't go to work Monday, had like half a day yesterday, but I'm going to let it all hang out for tomorrah.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27747999/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27747999/ Tue, 13 Oct 2009 16:08:04 PDT
I EVEN BOUGHT SHOES, REAL LIFE SHOES, THAT I CAN WEAR. OMG.

Momo's mama is gonna sew on a snap button at the top of the blouse. YOU WOULD BE APPALLED TO KNOW THAT IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO FIND JUST A SIMPLE SHORTSLEEVE OXFORD LOOKING SHIRT IN A BLOODY MALL OF ALL EFFING PLACES.

WHEEEEEEEE

I'm gonna make a poll about cosplaying soon too. 'cause I wanna know if you think it's stupid or not to do it. Just outta curiosity. Your opinions will not stop me from doing it.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27723892/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27723892/ Mon, 12 Oct 2009 11:02:10 PDT
]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27610224/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27610224/ Tue, 06 Oct 2009 06:40:59 PDT I keep waving at the taxis, they keep turning their lights off
But Julie knows a party at some actor's West side loft
Supplies are endless in the evening by the morning they'll be gone

When everything is lonely I can be my own best friend
I'll get a coffee and the paper, have my own conversations
with the sidewalk and the pigeons and my window reflection
The mask I polish in the evening by the morning looks like shit

And I know you have a heavy heart, I can feel it when we kiss
So many men stronger than me have thrown their backs out trying to lift it
But me I'm not a gamble, you can count on me to split
The love I sell you in the evening by the morning won't exist

You're looking skinny like a model with your eyes all painted black
Just keep going to the bathroom, always say you'll be right back
Well, it takes one to know one, kid, I think you've got it bad
But what's so easy in the evening by the morning's such a drag

I got a flask inside my pocket, we can share it on the train
And if you promise to stay conscious I will try and do the same
We might die from medication, but we sure killed all the pain
But what was normal in the evening by the morning seems insane

And I'm not sure what the trouble was that started all of this
The reasons all have run away, but the feeling never did
It's not something I would recommend, but it is one way to live
Cause what is simple in the moonlight by the morning never is

It was so simple in the moonlight now it's so complicated
It was so simple in the moonlight, so simple in the moonlight
So simple in the moonlight...

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27556546/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27556546/ Sat, 03 Oct 2009 10:55:55 PDT
Thank you to the asshole who rented the apartment before he even gave me the necessary paperwork to hand in to DSS. Now I have to find someplace else close enough to work AND affordable enough to stay it... AND IS HUD APPROVED.

WHORES. WHORES ALL!!

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27313312/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27313312/ Sun, 20 Sep 2009 05:50:48 PDT _< Umm, but I'm going to go look at it and see if it's an affordable, feasible place to go live.

Maybe it's just a waste of time. But I should know what kind of questions to ask when I go, and stuff.

Also, you should totally all read The Sight and its sequel, by David Clement-Davies. They are AMAZING ASS BOOKS. WICKED AWESOME.

...Also: All the books seem to have a flavor of conservation of wildlife and their habitats in them, without disrupting the flow of supernatural and myth in them.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27227552/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27227552/ Tue, 15 Sep 2009 13:20:45 PDT
01 - I will NOT draw your request until I see this in your journal.
02 - In your comment, include a link to a reference picture of the character you want me to draw. Or write me a description.
03 - Only one character per person- Remember, this is FREE.

(I just realized I don't have my scanner >_<

WOOT

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27108746/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27108746/ Wed, 09 Sep 2009 06:16:27 PDT
I learn something new all the damn time.

At the same time, I'm depressed again. I don't know WHAT it is. I am afraid to leave the motel I'm at, since it's startign to feel, once again, like home, but I have to be ready to move so that I can move on to bigger and better things, even if it's something as pathetic as an efficiency apartment for poor people. Like me. Yay!

This weekend is the weekend I'm going to Mo's house to take a look at all my crap in their garage, and decide what I am going to put into their garage sale. It may end up being quite a bit because I refuse to put up with so much stuff ever again. I'm even willing to give up a fuckton of books that I have already read and done with. Donations to libraries are awesome, 'cause I'm sure SOMEONE will enjoy the books I donate, since I sure as hell did.

Umm.. but yes, this weekend. Ohcrap, I forgot. Library in Keeseville is open on Saturdays for the winter now. So I get to be on the internet on Saturday, at least, even if I have to share with the community. Oh well! Not all that upset about it, honestly

Social Services is happy that I have a job, but my worker will call me if she needs to start seeing my paystubs.

And that's all for now. Nothing new. I have a job, so now I want to work very hard at it and make sure I learn the ropes quickly so I can be a good helper. Yay! I started during Fall - it's the time when it seems to slow down, they say. Lots of college kids come visit though.

Bye, everyone.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27089550/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/27089550/ Tue, 08 Sep 2009 07:36:56 PDT
Although I have done some things outside of work, relationships, things I've done wrong... but he's better off without me anyway. Someone who can actually motivate him in ways other than providing sex. I'm trying to keep a happy mind set about getting a job. This IS a good thing. I keep my appointments. I let people know what's going on.

Mo's dad took me grocery shopping yesterday at Wal-Mart because it really is cheaper in some regards than going to someplace like Stewart's (it's like a convenience gas station for the North Country, if you're wondering), basically just being my taxi for the day. We had Wendy's. Then I got home and realized I shouldn't be thinking so much about a guy who means so little to me when I've hurt the one who should mean something to me.

I've been conducting a horrible little number, an affair, I guess, only not really, because I told Kir and now he is understandably livid with me.

I'm... I don't know what to call love at this point. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm 22 years old, female, and I feel like a cheating whore. People have been telling me, it's not cheating, you're not, you're not, you're human and people have needs that need to be met, physical needs, and it's only natural... I can't trust myself to be around beautiful men because it's become an art to just stop caring about the repercussions and being the "good girl" who never does anything wrong. I've actually done something I've never done before: reached out to something I liked and got what I wanted. I have to stop this pathway of behavior, but I don't know who to talk to.

I've officially broken up with Kirby. I don't feel freed by any means, only trapped - am I now condemned to go from one bed to another, because loving someone feels too dangerous? After everything else, I'm afraid to settle in, sink my fingernails into a relationship and TRY, when I'm afraid to lose it like everything else has slipped away from me. I'm not strong enough to handle that disappointment again. I'm not strong enough to live without the familiar warmth of someone, even if it's as superficial as sex. I'm not a whore; I don't exist for the ever-elusive orgasm. I just... I guess I just want the illusion of being cared for, when no one really cares at all. (Don't get upset at me, people! I know you care, but this is Male, a force as powerful as gravity when it comes to certain things).

Things are always so out of control and I'm tired of being the one who tries to fix it, so maybe I need to be a little out of control too... but not at the cost of other's feelings. Not when it makes them disappointed in me. I keep thinking, "As long as I don't wear my heart on my sleeve, I'm okay." But that doesn't matter, it's about my integrity as a woman and a human being. Once it stops feeling fun, I'll put an end to it. And it will stop being 'fun', I know this because it's happening already.

Now more than ever.

No more. Stop it, Yoru-idiot. You can't start something you don't want to finish.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26973112/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26973112/ Wed, 02 Sep 2009 08:22:03 PDT
I says, "YES" and it is done. The job is acquired. Life is looking up. Joy is mine. I am happier for it.

Also: haven't been drawing half so much as I want. I've been doing lots and lots and lots of writing, though. If you want to check that out, I have a FF.net account over here: [link]

SONNY STRAIT CANCELED FOR BAKURETSUCON. MEANIE HEAD. NOW I AM VERY UNHAPPY >_<

If only someone else would go. Like my mind-voice Alucard A.K.A. Crispin Freeman.

OH! I have to let work now that I can't work those days. I hope they do not mind, so long as I give them due notice. IT IS NEXT MONTH. I CANNOT BELIEVE IT IS FALL/SEPTEMBER/ALMOST 2 MONTHS LEFT BEFORE MY ANIME CONVENTION.

HOLY SHIT.

SQUEEEEEE!!!!

Good thing it falls mostly on a weekend. I'll probably just have to take off Friday or something. No big deal. NO BIG DEAL AT ALL NUUU.

Anyway, um... I have nothing else a lot to say except I'm probably in a world of hurt where it concerns relationships. I no longer feel as if waiting for Kirby to come around with a job is something I should do. It's a waste of time. I have to get out of this motel and get my OWN damn apartment.

...suddenly I feel very, very alone. But... I'll be okay... because things are looking up for me and in the end, you have to look out for number one.

Love you all. Seeya!

P.S. I AM SO FUCKING HUNGRY I NEED MY FOODSTAMPS NOW PLX D:

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26936004/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26936004/ Mon, 31 Aug 2009 12:45:28 PDT
...it's the music, really. And Brown the dog. Yay!

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26352940/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26352940/ Mon, 03 Aug 2009 06:44:19 PDT
]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26324062/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26324062/ Sat, 01 Aug 2009 18:48:39 PDT
I'm screwed and this person I'm staying with probably won't say he just hates me. It's a nice way of saying, 'Sorry but gtfo, you're cramping my hermit style'.

So that was a stupid ass fucking mistake.

Moral of THIS Story: Never move in with a psychopathic hermit who means well because in the end, he'll get hives and kick you out.

And I hadn't even heard back from the places that were hiring yet.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26174388/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26174388/ Sat, 25 Jul 2009 16:29:11 PDT
[link]

Expect fanart. Lots and lots of fanart. Oh, and slash, I think.

It's a Korean manga. I think it's called manhwa in that country.

Without giving too much away, a girl goes to a new high school only to discover herself caught in the middle of a war between the four districts of Amityville - and trying to discover the truth about what REALLY happened to her before she arrived, and the strange fate she's got intertwined with a powerful, terrifying guy named Jack Frost.

XD Lots of shameless pantyshotting in the beginning, but fear not. It gets cooler. XD

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26148030/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26148030/ Fri, 24 Jul 2009 10:09:35 PDT deserves better.

In other news, I want to die because the job market hates me also.

Constantine and Devil May Cry, ftw. Yay.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26122998/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26122998/ Thu, 23 Jul 2009 05:41:23 PDT THEY CANT EET YOU IF YOU MAKE THEM DEAD
SHOOT THE ZOMBIES
SHOOT THE ZOMBIES
SHOOT THE ZOMBIES
HAY!!

THEY LIMP AROUND IN BLOOD AND COVER THINGS IN STAINS
THEY MOAN AND GROAN AND TRY TO EAT YOUR FLESH AND BRAINS
BUT IF YOU LEAD THEM DOWN AN ALLEY YOU CAN SNIPE THEM PRETTY BADLY
CUZ THE BEST WAY TO KILL ZOMBIES IS BY SHOOTING THEM IN THE HEAD

----

Songstowearpantsto.com, for everyone's enjoyment, please.

stwpt.com if that doesn't work (I think)

AND THAT GAME IS FUCKING AWESOME. I can't help but feel a little bit... um... white supremecist when I play. It takes place in Africa, yes. So ninety percent of the zombies I kill are black people who have been infected with the Plagas 3 virus.

Kinda sucks.

But my one complaint: all the new RE games aren't scary, but they are intense. I dare you all to play RE1 and tell me it's not nerve-wracking when shit actually jumps out at you.

Rawr.

I'm still waiting for a miracle a little bit. Going to fill out Best Buy applications for my store location and stuff.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26107233/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/26107233/ Wed, 22 Jul 2009 11:48:33 PDT
I've gone to Great Escape twice this summer. Lucky me! My arms are all farmer's tanned and shit, it sucks. Um. I haven't drawn much, but I've drawn a little. Mostly been taking pictures... for memories and stuff, you know? *sighs* I'll miss the family in Chazy, but I'll never be able to continue my life with them when they're so busy...

I count myself lucky that I got to have a break from the town life, anyway. They really do live in the middle of nowhere!

Pictures coming soon.

HAI HAI EVERYONE!!

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/25253506/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/25253506/ Thu, 11 Jun 2009 11:58:56 PDT
What the hell is going ON?

Ugh.

Anyway, I go on Gaia, thinking, "Surely someone must know of Bakuretsucon!"

And no one responds to my pathetic little thread. So I'm pissed. 'Cause I KNOW other folks are going and I wanna goooo.... *wails*

Sorry. I'm done wailing now.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/25085480/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/25085480/ Tue, 02 Jun 2009 09:34:00 PDT
It's really quite amazing.

Their kids are awesome and their dog is a rare and happy flat-coated retriever named Strawberry.

I'm at a friend's house though, they don't have internet. I need to pick up another job. I have bruises all over my body from moving furniture ALONE since the only men in the house jumped ship like a bunch of starving burning rats on fire.

My PS2 died.

I am bored. But strangely busy all the same.

And I'm going to an anime convention in Vermont for Halloween this year. I'm going to spend it with my friend Momo and we're going to be awesome. I may not have a fan costume to wear but I'll dress up and be my own anime character. SO HA. XDDD (Though I sekritly wish I cud be SEFFYWOFF OR AWOOCAADO)

Aaaanyway. Not much else to report. Been drawing. Been writing a lot more (momo says hi~)

KAAAAMEEHAAAMEEHAAA(*poot*)

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/23439977/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/23439977/ Fri, 27 Feb 2009 19:50:39 PST
1. Two people left the house leaving us with the $800 dollars to pay rent. Me, my lovely big bro figger C-man, and my loving dear (but pathetically jobless boyfriend) to pay.
2. I GOT FIRED FOR SOMETHING I DID NOT IN FACT DO WHICH CLEARLY SHOWS THE GODS ARE FUCKING WITH ME.
3. I'm looking for a second job, and possibly a shotgun, to blow my head off. I am clearly not going to be able to handle the immense pressure of constant heartache and dread.

So yeah.
I may have to move again. Don't know if C-man wants to seek a cheaper place to live since it's not possible to find another housemate. In fact, it's not possible at all, I'm thinking. Unless I go around colleges looking for idiots to move in and pay 200 a month or something.

I'm at my friend's house right now, bawling my eyes out on my friend's mom's shoulder because I feel so goddamn hopeless. My endeavor to actually succeed in the world is making no progress at all and I'm miserable as hell because I don't want to go back to my grandparents that are Christian and scary beyond all living reason with their beliefs. I need to sell or give away all my shit and move to Florida. There's better luck in Florida. I could be a prostitute. Or not. Like I'm going to get by on my writing, good looks, and witty humor.

I'm massively in need of money. If I had a paypal account, I could approve donations and such to my cause so I don't have to do all that.

In town, there's this guy named Reverend Phelps that came to Plattsburgth once. Look it up. I don't know if I spelled his name right, but look up PLATTSBURGH and ANTI-GAY RELIGIOUS MOVEMENT and you'll come up with this shithead. The last time he came, the entire town got together to peacefully protest his protest with "HATE IS NOT A PLATTSBURGH VALUE". He seriously had the balls to come to Plattsburgh once, before I moved up here, and tried to have some kind of antigay day or someshit. He's coming back this week apparently. I better stay indoors or my intolerance for ignorance will outmatch his intolerance for equality. And right across the street from where they'll be holding their little hate get together, there'll be a ... well, gay get together, I guess. I dont know. I don't watch the news because we don't have cable or satellite, I just found this out talking to Momo's parents.

So. Um. At any rate. I got a chance to play Persona4. It's bloody awesome. A lot of chat for an RPG though. THey weren't kidding when they wrote in Game INformer that the first three hours are you occasionally pressing the X button to advance mountains of conversation that are basically explaining everything. But the plot is thick, the voice acting is good, and there's lots of humor and characterization going on that kept me pretty interested.

I feel sick. LIke I'm coming down with a cold, too. The spring always gets me. It used to be fall that made me ill but now it's becoming the spring cold. It hurts my brain.

Um. More updates, maybe. I'm going to come back to this house to do some cleaning for them, for money, but we'll have to talk about it later. I have to reschedule an interview at the new workplace on Monday. There's even a slim chance I might get my job at Macro back. If that's the case, I"ll work those two jobs to the bone and save up in case this disaster shit happens again.

*Sighs* And ... that's it. I don't know. I've rambled for too long. Sorry for not being online, everyone...

-Yoru-chan

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22630960/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22630960/ Sat, 17 Jan 2009 10:24:57 PST
Seriously hated that guy lol but in the end it was a good movie.

I guess.. >_> I was half-asleep as it was finishing up. Then we got to cuddle togever and it was nice. *SIGH* GOOD NEWS too (sort of, for me, not for him, since he needs to see his family), Kir is staying a bit longer than I thought. Money is short.

I'm not sad about it since I'm stocked on food for a little while.... *sighs* A little scared of being so short on cash...

LOL I just want to point out how much it sucks that we have no hot water whatsoever right now. We haven't for alittle while. It got so cold a few weeks ago and we had none then but it came back. Now the pipes are being retarded. Ice cold black flecked water is coming through the hot water now ... >_< I'm dirty and cold and grumpy and I wanna throw something! >_<

-Me

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22615042/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22615042/ Fri, 16 Jan 2009 13:34:34 PST
Someone tell me how. Please...

I'm sorry...

-Me

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22170385/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22170385/ Wed, 24 Dec 2008 15:41:03 PST [link]

And it's not really within my price range. So here's where I have to challenge myself to actually save up for it. I've always wanted to make and mix music. It's one of those easy simple things I can do without really forcing anything and I love to experiment musically. I don't havea piano keyboard anymore, it was lost to the four winds when I moved (possibly I forgot that I gave it away to make the burden of moving easier).

But anyway.... something like that. Just a random thing I've desired. one day, though.

One day. *Sighs dreamily* ...One day music will be mine to command...

-Me

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22087224/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22087224/ Sat, 20 Dec 2008 14:58:42 PST I got Kingdom Hearts RE: Chain of Memories. And I don't really feel like playing it. It's weird. I usually lock myself into a dark room and play new games I love for hours.

But Kir randomly vanished to his dad's on a 'don't-know-when-i'm-coming-back' basis. >_> For Christmas, apparently. So. Yeah..

Working too many hours at once lately... just... sick with loneliness and holiday blues. Wish I could just go into a hole for the entire three months of Octnovdec.

EDIT: You know, now that I think about it... it would not feel so lonely if I had a family that actually felt like my own. Not like some stranger's life. They're beliefs are too radical for me. I'm no Born-Again-protestant-Hail-Mary child. And my grandma... she's just so... fragile. It's very hard to be myself around her when I'm so rough around the edges... I'm afraid I might, y'know, cut her with my sharp humor.

...I'm just... entirely depressed... she was mad when I said I got her a gift. If she doesn't want it, fine... I'm just really upset that Kir left and I'm lonely. I feel like ordering a pizza or something to console my stupid ass and stay warm and feel nice and fat.

Most of all, I hate work. I hate work. I hate work. I HATE WORK. It's gotten so bad where the minute i walk up the steps to go inside, I'm ready to leave. It's really quite sad. I can't bear to even talk on a regular phone on personal terms. Being without Kir is like being without an arm. I feel pretty stupid, like, "How can I have forgotten how to ENJOY being alone for once?"

And all my friends on LJ... I practically don't know if any of them still read it. I know i've been distant, but my mother DIED, and I'm just now learning how to do things the way I used to...

with the exception of having my usual complaints. Now I have more adult issues facing me. Like health insurance. And whatnot. *shot*

(Copy-pasted from my LJ 'cause I'm lazyyyy!)
To my DA folks:
I don't mean to drag you guys down, I sincerely hope you all have a decent holiday, something you can smile on! I hope so for me too...

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22011320/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/22011320/ Tue, 16 Dec 2008 08:07:42 PST _< I don't know. But watch those. You can't go wrong.

MtR: FUNNY AS HAIL
TDK: LONG AS HAIL BUT JUST AS GOOD.

ENJOY EET.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21895590/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21895590/ Tue, 09 Dec 2008 09:39:42 PST
But I'm going to look around some more for that Sephiroth figurine... because I want one. A poseable one. Yeah >_< I've wanted one ever since Advent Children came out... and I think I can attempt to order one online...

In any event... I've had an art funk lately, a writing funk.. and pretty much everything else... But I've had a strong desire to make music but I don't have any decent music-making program either. The kind of music I want to make like, with a synthizer computer and a piano keyboard.

*sighs* Anyway... being a creative person with limited outlets kind of blows... makes me a bit ashamed because... well... I am so poor and pathetic and I could make so much money being creative if I had the resources.

So, guys. I'm done being emo about not having creative outlets now. I hope everyone has an awesome holiday or whatever you celebrate.

LOVE YOU ALL!!

-MEZ0RZ

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21846945/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21846945/ Sat, 06 Dec 2008 11:41:31 PST

I AM FREEZING MY ASS OFF.

ANAGRAMS:

Because I have nothing to write about

A Dam Darn Rag I
Armada Daring
A Drama Daring
A Grandma Raid
A Diagram Darn
Grandma Ad Air

[link]

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21507222/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21507222/ Sat, 15 Nov 2008 19:35:54 PST

10 things that Start with W that I Like:
1. Watermelon
2. World of Warcraft
3. Wine (sake, technically btwfev)
4. Winning
5. Wind
6. Warmth (*Snuggles meh Cubbeh*)
7. Whips and chains omg
8. Wyverns (they're LIKE dragons only not.)
9. Wordplay
10. ..WEINER

I tag everyone who wants to do it with the letter Y!!

I FINALLY BOUGHT VAMPIRE HUNTER D VOLUME 11. THE BOOK IS HUGE. *READS*

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21291591/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21291591/ Sun, 02 Nov 2008 21:17:01 PST
But apparently, we came back. Got a 30 pack of Bud for Kirby and some Green Apple Smirnoff for myself, since I haven't had any of those fancy schmancy flavors!

I drank three down. REAL fast. Apparently? I get real tipsy. And cuddly. And giggly. And i'm a teetotaler. Fuck off.

And we RPed this Silent Hill inspired thing. It was based on rolls of levels of success-failure and it was pretty fucked up. And we ordered pizza. Dude. It was great.

Then? Corey and Kir and I switched rooms with Danny. So I, like, totally have the bigger room. And it's awesome. It's awesome. I feel like a new woman - now that I'm not like, strugging for space amidst KIR'S DIRTY LAUNDREHZ.

Woot. Anyway, it was awesome. XD And the sex was great. I was so happy that night, just to be accepted and hang out. And stuff.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21123331/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21123331/ Thu, 23 Oct 2008 10:04:52 PDT
I have no reason to believe I'm out of the woods yet. I have to think of school soon and it's going to get a little ridiculous, balancing two things I've never done before. I'll have to get a planner and make damn good use of it so I won't lose track of all the things I have to do.

So, yeah. It's just a matter of getting a more active life. Having a pathway... carving toward the future, gritting my teeth, setting about the rotten task with a steeled will and a firm heart.

I may not see all of you very much but it will be a pleasure to talk to you once in awhile and express my woes in a variety of pixelated phrases on a screen. It's better than nothing.

I'm really effing cold. I can't believe I have to live in this place with no heat. Guess what I'll have to buy soon? Thick-ass socks, and hats, and new, thick sweaters to wear 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Winters here are notorious people-killers if you're a complete moron and don't bundle up.

I'll never complain about the heat after this winter, I swear to the Nine Circles of Hell.

*sighs* Anyway... drop me a comment or love?

I am aware of our art trade. I'm getting it together in my mind. >_> I'll get it on paper soonz.
-Me

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21043091/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/21043091/ Sat, 18 Oct 2008 07:19:37 PDT
I'm bored... Gaia is awesome, go join.
Why can't I change my mood on DA? Well, I can but I'd get a random mood that doesn't match how I feel 'cause I can't see the icons... wtf...

HALP!!

INKDEATH IS AWESOME but lately it's taking me ages to finish a book. You can't just go from VAMPIRES and DEATH and beautiful prose to... Inkdeath, a book intented for kids 13 and up... which, honestly, should be 15 and up since a character named Orpheus is written to "often take his pleasure with the maids".

"Mommy, what does that mean??"

Mommy: "...!! WTF U BE READIN BOA!"

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/20824512/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/20824512/ Sat, 04 Oct 2008 11:52:48 PDT
I STAYED UP TIL 5AM LAST NIGHT, TRIPPIN' ON MOUNTAIN DEW AND PIZZA.

YAY FOR REWATCHING SH THE MOVIE AGAIN

PYRAMID HEAD FTW (needs more Pyramid Head. A Pyramid Head MOVIE would need more Pyramid Head.)

WEWT.

And btw, when the hell did it start taking me a Life Age to finish a goddamn book? HURRY UP AND FINISH SO I CAN START READING INKDEATH NOW PLOX.

*Dashes off to consider what other arts to finish inkin'...*

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/20737800/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/20737800/ Mon, 29 Sep 2008 08:38:53 PDT
So maybe this weekend you'll see me puttin' up some artwork. Kir too if I can wrench it away from him. *grins*

But, well, second of all... MALLOWEEN is something that happens in October. People can dress up in their Halloween costumes and run around the mall like freaks. YAY!! I'll take pictures so you can see the horrific stuff I done did. *woots*

Anyway... *sighs* WORK TODAY AT 5.. as usual. But I have lots of fewd. Kir made country fried steaks for me on Saturday. I helped (a little)... and they WERE awesme. Spent months, a year, telling me how great these steaks are, and he did it, and it was AWESOME!! YUM YUM. I ate it so fast I almost got ill *giggles* But it was delicious, I helped make the four-cheese potatoes we got too. And country gravy... *burps* It was rather peppery! But it was uber double-plus gewd.

Soo... BAI BAI NOW.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/20631980/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/20631980/ Tue, 23 Sep 2008 08:21:10 PDT [link]

I JUST WENT TO HEAVEN. IT HAS ICE CREAM. AND PYRAMID HEAD.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/20055245/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/20055245/ Wed, 20 Aug 2008 07:43:40 PDT
So, lately I've been working and playing old video games I haven't touched in years, like FF8, and FF9..and a game I never GOT to play, FF2 which was not released in the US. I'm playing it on FFrigins. It's really cute!

So I work at Macro, which is a telephone survey job. I call people and get yelled at all day long for bothering them!! OHNORZ D8

But I'm used to that, I don't take it personally. And therefore, I am not limited to eating such items as ramen, drinking water, or anything like that. I can't wait to get paid this Friday so I can treat myself to anime. And maybe treat me and out to eat to Jade Buffet or something like that Yay!

And someday... someday, I'll get a damn scanner. BLARGH!!

Kk, gotta go for now, love ya'll.

-Me

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/19694300/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/19694300/ Thu, 31 Jul 2008 06:36:26 PDT
But I went to Labor Ready (Crappy emergency emplyoment thing, paid by the day). It sucks. They pay you less than if you actually worked for the people they send you to go help. But it's money... I worked for four hours, got really sunburnt. I helped get some turf flattened ni front of target and laid down some grassy sod so, now I can say I helped make the new Target at our mall look pretty.

Yay.

I'm so sick of ramen. I am starving. HELP ME PLZ.

QUIZ TIEM (STOLED FROM :Icontrala: HEE.

1. What is your one FLAWLESS talent?
Everyone says it's writing... so, yeah....? But it has flaws... *Shrugs*

2. A new food/tasty thing you have recently discovered:
Oriental-flavored ramen? >_> SO GOOD.

3. Name a few guilty pleasures you have:
Yaoi, chocolate, manga. (LAME, I know )

4. Something that has been bothering you lately:
I feel like my special someone has been ignoring me and that he's not putting all his effort into finding us work so we can live.

5. Something that made you happy recently:
I discovered I have a Jaxter (JakxDaxter) fetish deep in my soul. Now I'll be occupied for a few days

6. What are you listening to now, in terms of music? (if there is no music what did you listen to last?)
Era of Peace by Nemesis Theory

7. On the subject of music, what kind of music seems to have peaked your interest?
Trance, ambient, techno.

8. How often do use Japanese phrases?
Not very often.

9. What do you plan on doing with your life:
Get a job, try to finish what I began with school, make my special person realize he's an awesome person and should treat himself with more respect. Oh, and MAYBE publish a fiction novel...

10. A burning passion you have:
I want to publish a book.

11. Cutest couple you know here on DA!
I'd say me and my special person but we're more of a tragic thing, really. But it's still cute.

12. Did you ever own a Neopets account, and if so what was your user name?
Holy shit. Um, it was young_gunslinger. And now it is abandoned to the internet tides.
13. What do you think of when you look at a sunset?
How it seems to transform everything into a different world. I like how mundane a place can look until you see it in the light of twilight. THen it looks... strange/creepy/awesome.

14. What is one thing you have really been itching to do lately?
Get a job.

15. What element would you consider yourself?
Fire.

16. Something that has made you very sad/nervous:
I need a job. And it's a bitch to get one.

17. What is one thing you ALWAYS keep track of?
My DA and fanfiction.net.

18. Favorite number EVER!!!!
3.

19. Do you consider yourself to be a genius in any field?
...Nahhh.

20. A hobby you have that not everyone knows:
I collect fuzzy stuffed kitties and lions.

21. The ideal age of a person is:
8.

22. Your room is...
Organized chaos.

23. Describe your mood, now, in one word:
Desperately depressed.

24. What do you think of fangirls?
A pall on the face of all humanity.

25. Your favorite word/phrase:
"Nyuu".

26. Your ideal place to be...?
Swimming somewhere, having fun.

27. What is your favorite reality TV show?
I don't have none. I hate them all! >_<

28. Something you have always hated with a fiery passion:
Liars and lazy people.

29. Any last words before you tag 3 people?
I has a special person and I wuvs him very much!!!!!
I don't feel like tagging. Do it if you wanna.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/19105564/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/19105564/ Sun, 29 Jun 2008 08:06:13 PDT
I refuse to talk about my relationship problems. Same old same old. He's a stupid slut; I'm just trying to be nice.

Anyway!

I has no scanner. But I have a drawing that's in my BIG sketchbook that I want to share. So I'll be uploading photos taken of the same picture so you can see it. I think I'll put it in sketches and whatnot... but you can go see it if you want.

I hope everyone else is doing okay! Have a nice Fourth if I don't update before then.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18932118/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18932118/ Thu, 19 Jun 2008 14:33:38 PDT My grandparents disowned me. No wonder my mother never talked to them. Foolish old people. *sighs*

Anyway... uhh... I'm okay! Gonna go uh, set up my bedroom now.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18798156/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18798156/ Thu, 12 Jun 2008 08:25:39 PDT
So. Found out where my friend lives that said in a previous entry that I may live there. MAY. I'm hopeful. I worked hard to figure it out. My grandparents drove me there the other day, and today I biked to Plattsburgh again and I'm at the library here so I can type this entry.

My only new problem now is I must plan to take care of the stuff in my mom's old apartment. Which means I may need to get rid of even more stuff so I don't take up so much space IF I MOVE IN ELSEWHERE. T_T I have nothing to show for all this effort. But at least today I finally submitted my FAFSA. Now I've got to see if I need to fix it after they "process" it. Like SPAM. Wow.

But I've got a ride home today. At 4:30, I'll get a ride back home with my uncle.

You know what? There's something awesomely liberating about being able to ride a bike somewhere, and not have to think about anything else. It's definitely not as hard as it was before. My only complaint was that it was a LITTLE chilly - and my nose was running the whole time. But I feel great, and I can tell my legs are getting nice and muscly from all that pedaling. OKAY. So it's mostly downhill but THERE ARE UPHILL PARTS. And flat parts, wher eI've got to make myself go faster. DX

Anyway... uhhh... I don't have any new drawings scanned yet because I didn't bring my sketchbook to take to Ray's house to scan. I figured I'd save myself some trouble by traveling light. It paid off.

Seeya!

And TNLK. Get hold of me, wouldja? CALL THE HOUSE NUMBER T_T.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18659541/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18659541/ Wed, 04 Jun 2008 10:02:10 PDT It may be my last visit.)

I've also discovered I can bike six and a half miles if I have to. I can't stay at my grandparents' house. Their values and religion is suffocating. I'm practically going nuts there. I want to go elsewhere.

I'm grateful I can pedal a bike at least. But a twelve mile (adding getting here and back again) is a hard pill to swallow, especially since I'm not all that physically inclined to begin with.

I can't tell you how much pain I was in when I got back Monday. *Shudders*

*doodles*

See ya...

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18356178/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18356178/ Fri, 16 May 2008 18:24:43 PDT
That's what mine said today.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18289705/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18289705/ Mon, 12 May 2008 13:29:03 PDT
I've been watching way too much Animal Planet too. Someone make me watch something else.

ALSO!! October seems to be the month for manga/anime this year. Remind me to save up for it all. And whatnot. I've also got a couple Okami artworks to submit - a bit late. But I know I'd never be able to win a contest of that magnitude!! Especially considering who WON. Congrats to 'em.

Additionally, I might not be on the internet this summer. We'll see what happens.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18099251/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/18099251/ Wed, 30 Apr 2008 09:49:41 PDT
Yeah. That's all I'm saying for now.

BUSY.

But updates! I switched an image from Dante And Alucard to a scanned image, so ya'll can see it proper-like.

Bai-bai.

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/17563163/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/17563163/ Fri, 28 Mar 2008 19:25:07 PDT
I love Kirby. He will never belong to me - but I will never stop loving him. SO GET OVER IT, YARRR. *Waves angry pitchfork stuff*

No time for drawings. This makes me a sad Mandaface. And life hates me just a bit - time management is hard to do ... quickly. T_T

]]> ~yorukami http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/17163097/ http://yorukami.deviantart.com/journal/17163097/ Mon, 03 Mar 2008 11:19:40 PST
Um, um. I'm not going to be on the cmoputer as much, I'm assuming. Over spring break which starts next week, I'll apparently be shuttled around a bit between folks... I really, really want to visit my friend in Rochester (*sighs* I never get to see or do anything I want with my spare fucking time). Anyway, uhh... My mother's online friends had instructions from mom to send me money in case she died >_> Which is freakin' me out. But I don't care... or mind. Or whatever... I don't care anymore. Money? I don't care if I end up on the fucking streets.

It's getting warm out. Yeah. So it's all good. Hnnn...

Kirby's been really good to me. He was here for a long time, helping me when I cried, actually talking instead of looking hopelessly off to the side as if he were trying to mentally displace himself from the immediate area. Yay! <3 <3 Sadly he had to go somewhere today, but I'll be all right... I need my space for awhile. Got to play catch-up with my stupid homework. *sighs*

I just want to say thanks to everyone who has left comments of understanding and love. <3 I really really appreciate it. It means more than words can say...!
-Amanda

]]> ~yorukami