deviantART: by:yvanklestein

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I Know It's Old...

But it still makes me giggle.
Have removed the racism.
Yes, I know this story isn't exactly how The incident went down, but it's the funnier rendition.
Photos below, Followed by by some wisdom.
Today's Features are, appropriately, all Aircraft Related.

The Tale Of The Flight Crew..

The brand spanking new Airbus 340-600, one of the largest passenger airplanes ever built, sat in its
hangar in Toulouse, France without a single hour of airtime. Enter the flight crew of Abu Dhabi Aircraft Technologies (ADAT) to conduct pre-delivery tests on the ground, such as engine runups, prior to delivery to Etihad Airways in Abu Dhabi.
The ADAT crew taxied the A340-600 to the run-up area. Then they took all four engines to takeoff power with a virtually empty aircraft. Not having read the run-up manuals, they had no clue just how light an empty A340-600 really is.
The takeoff warning horn was blaring away in the cockpit because they had all 4 engines at full power.
The aircraft computers thought they were trying to takeoff but it had not been configured properly (flaps/slats, etc.). Then one of the ADAT crew decided to pull the circuit breaker on the Ground Proximity Sensor to silence the alarm. This fools the aircraft into thinking it is in the air. The computers automatically released all the brakes and set the aircraft rocketing forward.
The ADAT crew had no idea that this is a safety feature so that pilots can't land with the brakes on.
Not one member of the seven-man crew was smart enough to throttle back the engines from their max power setting, so the $200 million brand-new aircraft crashed into a
blast barrier, totalling it.
The extent of injuries to the crew is unknown.

Finally, the photos are starting to leak out. Airbus $200 million aircraft meets retaining wall
and the wall wins....
Now look at the photos!
http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/20852517/ Mon, 06 Oct 2008 04:29:13 PDT Deviant =yvanklestein | "Dream A Little Dream Of Me"

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Why Do I Want Small Childs?

simple answer: I Don't. However, I have an 8 year old nephew, who could do with a penpal!

Anyone willing to help, who may want a penpal themselves, please note me.

Cheers.

Features

=firedance99 Is the best friend I could ask for. She's a talented photographer, and she shies away when you nudge her on MSN.

All featured images are from her trip to New Zealand

=http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/20759778/ Tue, 30 Sep 2008 13:20:36 PDT Deviant =yvanklestein | "Dream A Little Dream Of Me"

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DotY

Nominations Open:
Click Here For Info.
Dooo Eeet.

Features

=ratcats Is a cool kiwi deviant, who seems to enjoy sending me weird picture messages, including a picture of a packet of "Wipe On Sex Appeal"

*markh255 A good flatmate, with a great eye for photography. Some of these features were taken in the backyard. Including Blowing up watermelons. ^{Not Shown Below}

=yvanklestein Important Announcement! http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/20559825/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/20559825/ Fri, 19 Sep 2008 00:04:28 PDT Deviant =yvanklestein | "Dream A Little Dream Of Me"

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I Got A New Jacket

And I Looks Good In Eet.

New Features Below: From The last Two Visitors To My Homepage:

Features

~ToxicPaprika Is a Dude from a place

~dawny Seems to be a cool chicky from the states!

http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/20284289/ Tue, 02 Sep 2008 15:17:29 PDT Deviant =yvanklestein | "Dream A Little Dream Of Me"

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Competition Winner

CONGRATULATIONS: *Trapiki

And the title of the movie is:
The Devil Wears Prada

She now has he subscription.

New Competition

Just note me the name of the movie I am watching at this second. The first one to name it correctly wins the sub.

There is another hint, due to the lack of entriest:
indeed she does
This is a 2006 movie, nominated for two Oscars.

I have noted myself the answer to myself. And screenshotted it to make sure I donât forget.

For the meantime, here are the specifics:
Title of the movie must go in the subject.
If you want to donate the sub to someone else, leave their name in the body of the message. Otherwise leave it blank.

Get noting.

Features

=firedance99 My best friend, in the world, and she lives in England. She is awesome.

http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/20124305/ Sun, 24 Aug 2008 04:32:44 PDT

.

naw serious, he's awesome. go give him love.

1.Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.

Adpobe Photoshop CS2 user Guide
>"to move a pallette to another group, drag the"

2.Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you reach?
The wall.

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Russell Peters: Outsourced

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
Elevenish

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
11:16

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
Sam Sparro - Black and Gold

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Walking from my house, crossing my moat, and going to the shack

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
Eriq's Journal

9. What are you wearing?
Boxers. Socks. Polypro. My Eternal shirt.

10. Did you dream last night?
Yes

11. When did you last laugh?
Just before i kissed =LP4ng3l-for-lif3 buh bye, she going home for two weeks.

12. What are on the walls of the room you are in?
this poster an old calender, and a Print of this

13. Seen anything weird lately?
Yuss

14. What do you think of this quiz?
Quiz?? Are there prizes involved?? -

15. What is the last film you saw?
Office Space. Again

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
A Home In yorkshire. Where i can live with my awesome girls: =firedance99 =LP4ng3l-for-lif3 and two kitties. one called Toast. One called Omelette.

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know about
I have a weird birthmark on my inner thigh.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
make it so i can emigrate to england withouut having to go thru all this sponsorship bollocks.

19. Do you like to dance?
Only Nude, Alone, and To JONEZETTA

20. George Bush:
Waxed Bush

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Svenja

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Alexei (Ah-Lex-eye)

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Planning to move to england somewhere in the next decade.

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
I'm sure this is your round...

25.Tag six people who must also do this in THEIR journal:
*Queen-of-Randomness =firedance99 `timmy64 ~Kyleniebob *unwanted-princess ~lizelei *KatherineDavis

]]> =yvanklestein Surprise My Pants Off! http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19912224/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19912224/ Wed, 13 Aug 2008 05:58:24 PDT

Firstly:
-The Prize

A Subscription OR

A 8x12 or 8x10 print of ANY of my photos I still have the originals to, that you choose. OR

Both.
[Edit]: I think there was a misunderstanding: You don't have to answer all of the three. they were just suggestions of what you could use to shock me!

Secondly:
-The Challenge

Shock My Pants Off.
(Some Suggestions of what you could do)
-Tell me something about you that I didn't know.
-Ask me a question that I would not expect you to ask, or one that makes me blush. (I will not answer any question that invades the privacy of someone else. One of my lovers, confidants, or family members.)
-Show me something. (I don't want porn, or anything dusgusting. Show me something that makes me laugh, cry, or poop myself.)

The one that shocks me the most. Comp closes 12am, NZ Time, 31 August 2008.

SO get shocking.

]]> =yvanklestein Apologies... http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19807920/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19807920/ Wed, 06 Aug 2008 11:51:57 PDT I have been organising my photographical processing procedures (i.e. the way I deal with photos once ive taken them), and have recreated my archiving system to one that actually has some form of order.
In doing so, i have come across various photos from over the past year, which have missed being submitted, so have been submitted as I came across them in the last 10 hours.

On the plus side, however, I am now, completely, up to date with Photos.

It's 0645am.
My butt is numb.
In the last 15 hours I've had 2 pies to eat.
I endevour to now eat some pasta, and drink coffee.

No bed for me until 6pm tonight.
:sigh:

But also, on friday, I'm going home to go see my family for three days.

Take Care,

Stay Safe,

And Be Kind to One-Another.

Yvan

]]> =yvanklestein What Men Say & What they mean http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19656243/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19656243/ Tue, 29 Jul 2008 07:47:25 PDT He says: "I can't find it."
He means: It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I am completely clueless.

He says: "That's women's work."
He means: It's difficult, dirty and thankless.

He says: "Will you marry me?"
He means: My roommates have moved out, the laundry is piling up, and I have no idea about grocery shopping.

He says: "It's a guy thing."
He means: There's no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical.

He says: "Can I help with dinner?"
He means: Why isn't it already on the table?

He says: "It would take too long to explain."
He means: I have no idea how it works.

He says: "I'm getting more exercise lately."
He means: The batteries in the remote are dead.

He says: "We're going to be late."
He means: I have a legitimate reason for driving like a maniac.

He says: "Take a break, honey, you're working too hard."
He means: I can't hear the commentary because of the vacuum cleaner.

He says: "That's interesting dear."
He means: Are you still talking?

He says: "Honey, we don't need material things to prove our love."
He means: I forgot our anniversary again.

He says: "You expect too much from me."
He means: You expect me to stay awake?

He says: "It's really a good movie."
He means: It's got guns, knives, fast cars and naked women.

He says: "You know how bad my memory is."
He means: I remember the address of the first girl I kissed and the registration number of every vehicle I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday.

He says: "I was just thinking about you, and got you these roses."
He means: The salesgirl selling them was a real babe.

He says: "Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself, it's no big deal."
He means: I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt.

He says: "Hey, I've got reasons for what I'm doing."
He means: Oops! What did you catch me at?

He says: "She's one of those rabid feminists."
He means: She refused to make my coffee.

He says: "I heard you."
He means: I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and hope I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me.

He says: "You know I could never love anyone else."
He means: I am used to the way YOU yell at me, and realize it could be worse.

He says: "You really look terrific in that outfit."
He means: Please don't try on any more outfits, I'm starving.

He says: "I missed you."
He means: I can't find my socks, the kids are hungry, and we've run out of groceries.

He says: "I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are."
He means: No one will ever see us alive again.

He says: "This relationship is getting too serious."
He means: I like you almost as much as I like my car or bike.

He says: "I don't need to read the instructions."
He means: I am perfectly capable of screwing it up without printed help.

]]> =yvanklestein Here's to the Fathers http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19656225/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19656225/ Tue, 29 Jul 2008 07:45:32 PDT On the outside of children, But looking in.
Such curious men snapping cameras like mad,
Recording the moment, they turn into "Dad."
Here's to the fathers, who put in their time,
Who don't say to Mother, that's your job, not mine.
Who wipe chins and noses and never say "won't"
Who do with the nappies, what some fathers don't.
Here's to the fathers who manage to stay
When so many fathers are turning away.
When so many run, leaving families to rot,
Here, then, a cheer, for those who do not.
Here's to the fathers whose big money dreams,
Die in the corner, while their baby screams.
And yet without anger, dread or regrets,
They comfort the child, hold it close to their chests.
And as the child grows, they grow with it too,
Learning a depth, that they never knew.
And soon they are older, their hair slightly gone,
Chasing two children around the front lawn.
Or carpooling teams to rugby and netball games,
Buying them hamburgers after it rains.
They mend broken dolls and fix broken wheels,
They cringe when their daughters try their first pair of heels.

They reach in their pockets, but never keep count,
They pay dear for parenthood, awful amounts.
They postpone their plans to sail across seas,
Instead they sing "Wiggles" and bandage skinned knees.
Here's to the fathers who miss on promotions,
Who forego the bonus, for birthday commotions.
Who come home from work and a boss they don't like,
Pull in the drive and run over a bike.
Here's to the fathers who get off the phone,
To hear their sons practice their new saxophone.
Who leave work to see their daughters recital,
Here's to the heroes who work without title.
For this is a world now full of neglect,
With everyday stories of lives that are wrecked.
Of fatherless children who take up with guns,
To kill other children of fatherless sons.
Divorce shattered families, childhoods derailed,
Mothers still waiting for checks still unmailed.
You wonder what wrongs these souls ever did,
To make a grown man turn away from his kids.
So here's to the fathers who won't compromise,
Who see a light shining in their children's eyes.
And feel a rare glow as if from a gem,
And know that once someone saw this glow in them.
For all the good boys, they have raised in the world,
For all the examples they set for their girls,
For all the loved children, whose stories they'll tell.
Here's to the father's that taught them so well.

]]> =yvanklestein A Different Kind of Prayer http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19656154/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19656154/ Tue, 29 Jul 2008 07:40:14 PDT
Father, Help us remember that the jerk who cut us off in traffic last night is a single mother who worked nine hours that day and was rushing home to cook dinner, help with homework, do the laundry and spend a few precious moments with her children.

Help us to remember that the pierced, tattooed, disinterested young man who can't make change correctly is a worried 19-year-old college student, balancing his apprehension over final exams with his fear of not getting his student loans for next semester.

Remind us, that the scary looking bum, begging for money in the same spot every day (who really ought to get a job!) is a slave to addictions that we can only imagine in our worst nightmares.

Help us to remember that the old couple walking annoyingly slow through the store aisles and blocking our shopping progress are savoring this moment, knowing that, based on the biopsy report she got back last week, this will be the last year that they go shopping together.

Father, remind us each day that, of all the gifts you give us, the greatest gift is love and tolerance. It is not enough to share that love with those we hold dear. Open our hearts not just to those who are close to us but to all humanity.

Let us be slow to judge and quick to forgive.

Bless us with patience, empathy love.......and tolerance
AMEN!

]]> =yvanklestein Men Myth Explanations... And More... http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19656145/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19656145/ Tue, 29 Jul 2008 07:39:26 PDT Myths have sprung up about the nature of men for ages.

However, until women learn from the findings of the Great Male Survey, they'll continue to believe the stories they've made up about us when it comes to dating. Here, we look at the common male myths surrounding the controversial subject of dating.

10) Men like younger women
^{Conventional wisdom suggests it's hardwired into men to go for younger women, that it's instinctive, and on that deep, animal level we're looking for a woman who has the best chance of giving us children. Of course, younger women are more likely to do this than older ones, however, it is by no means a hard-and-fast rule.

Then again, it's the younger women who make themselves more attractive. They're the ones hitting the clubs, dressed to impress. They're also the ones least likely to be locked into an established, long-term relationship. Maybe we're just taking our pick of what's on offer? We'll have to wait and see...

9) Men hate chick flicks}
^{Gentle humor and predictable, heart-warming endings: Why wouldn't guys like chick flicks? The fact is they're targeted at women. The stories they want to hear, the men they want date, the plucky, if slightly overweight, girl gets her happy ending -- and not a single gunfight, car chase or explosion throughout the entire thing.

However, do men "hate" them? Hate's a strong word. While guys don't walk into a bar and tell their buddies to check out the latest chick flick at the movies, most have sat down and made it through Bridget Jones' Diary. Some might have even liked it}.

8) Men are eager to cheat
^{Women have this firmly held belief that the only thing stopping us from falling into bed with their best friend, the hot barmaid or the nearest stranger is their constant, steely gaze upon us. When it comes to sex, myths have sprung up claiming men are ruled by the penis and not even relationships, promises or consequences are able to stop us from sleeping with someone else.

This could be true for some men, but it'd be rather harsh to judge us all by these standards. And maybe women shouldn't be so quick to propagate this myth. A recent poll found 40% of guys think dating should be exclusive, while just 33% of women agreed to that same statement.}

7) Men are intimidated by intelligence
^{The stereotype that men are looking for a blond bimbo girlfriend is a commonly held one. According to this myth, we men don't want a woman who can think for herself and actually hold an opinion or read the odd book or two. No, that would undermine our own intelligence. We just want a girl to look pretty and keep quiet.

Maybe it's our (almost) constant lusting over airhead models and actresses that makes this seem like a plausible myth. However, research suggests that 70% of us highly rate intelligence, with 50% ranking looks as being important. Of course, stick a guy in a bar with a super-smart, yet rough-looking, woman and a stunning, ditzy chick and these stats may just evaporate.}

6) Men are intimidated by success
^{Men tend to be competitive by nature. Throw a bunch together and before long, just like peacocks or stags, we'll be trying to find out who's the best; who can shoot the most hoops; who earns more, etc. At times, we can get close to whipping out a measuring stick just to see who's really the man amongst us.

So the myth perpetuates that this must-win attitude carries over to our dating. Apparently, we don't want to meet successful women because that would somehow make us less manly -- after all, we're supposed to look after the chick, right? In reality, just 6% of men would be concerned if their date earned more than them. However, the rest might change their minds when their date picks them up from their mom's house in her brand new BMW.}

5) Men are scared of marriage
^{The Kryptonite of all men, allegedly, is the institution of marriage. It's the one thing that can send an otherwise functional guy in a happy relationship completely insane. Faced with the prospect of a wedding, a guy will chew off his own leg before going through with that long walk down the aisle.

This logic means that every married man on the planet was either tricked, coerced or bribed into settling down with the woman he loves. It's not even like women are that desperate to head down the aisle these days. In figures that would shock Jane Austin, just 18% of women say they are looking for marriage.}

4) Men want to be eternal bachelors
^{And who wouldn't? A constant stream of women looking to share your bed and as much beer and PlayStation as you can handle is the life of the real bachelor. A wife, kids, responsi... ]]>} =yvanklestein Fading Out http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19595253/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/19595253/ Fri, 25 Jul 2008 18:06:57 PDT
Seems my interest in this site is waxing and waning.
I still have as much love for everyone on here as i ever did, but my enthusiasm is fading...

I will still be here, checking on your art, and replying to messages and such, but I'm not sure I'll be posting anything new...

Love to you all,

=Y

Yvan@Drake.net.nz
+64274657754

]]> =yvanklestein Clitter! http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/18996399/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/18996399/ Mon, 23 Jun 2008 07:17:46 PDT
Clicky For Clitter

Who's Scared?

^MA++

luffs for you all.

]]> =yvanklestein So I Heard You HAET mudkipz? http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/17919670/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/17919670/ Fri, 18 Apr 2008 22:14:15 PDT Thanks To =gothic-anomie for this deviation, to which im sure many of us can relate:
^{(Three month sub is going to =gothic-anomie when i have the money)}

Also: Props and a three month sub to *Lucanos for this blessing: [link]

]]> =yvanklestein ZOMG I DROPPED MY LENS! http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/17825529/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/17825529/ Sun, 13 Apr 2008 04:31:56 PDT

Devmeet

ZOMG =firedance99 STOLE MY CAMERA!!!1!!111

ProjectX

Birthday

Going Back

Top Tips

Devmeet
Was fantastic! Starting off at starbucks, Citymall, we then ventured off to rockpool,
Photos and full journal to come when i get my camera back, but for the meantime, here's the rollcall:
^{*Equinox2004
=firedance99 (All the way from England, Ladies and gentlemen!)
=LP4ng3l-for-lif3
~Psycho-Llama
~TehFeeesh
~digitalJackalnz
=RealmKnight (+Anjela)
=Bostwickenator}
Overall a great turn out!
^{(Yes, I did drop my lens after the devmeet. Fortunately it was my shitty kit-lens, and it's ok, apart from some superficial scratches. From what I can tell. I'm waiting to get my camera back to double check)}

ZOMG =firedance99 STOLE MY CAMERA!!!1!!111
Kinda.
We have the same camera bag, and were in a hurry to get to the airport, so somehow my camera ended up in her bag, and hers in mine. Nonetheless. w00t for international couriers.

See some of =firedance99's works from NZ:

ProjectX
What... ]]> =yvanklestein Yvan Is Back! http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/17308380/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/17308380/ Wed, 12 Mar 2008 20:47:24 PDT Am well, and all that shit.
Loving living in Christchurch, Settling into my flat, living with *Equinox2004, and finally filtering thru most of my photos.

Of course, still much loving for *LP4ng3l-for-lif3.

Below are some of my latest photos,
I can't show enough gratitude to those who have favourited my work, or left comments. Especially to those who have bought my prints.
If you do want any of my works added as prints, just let me know...

Taggies!
I've missed out on a few lately, so note me with links if you want to tag me with something.

Other Things:
There is something that has happened lately, which was fortunately not publicized in NZ too much, but i believe it was huge in Aussie,
And i would like to later on, Share my opinion.
Please, until i have loaded the journal, no speculation, please.

Until later on, peeps, feel free to check out some of my latest deviations below,

Blessings,

Yvan

]]> =yvanklestein Sydney devMEET! http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/16772152/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/16772152/ Sat, 09 Feb 2008 22:16:49 PST Much thanks for =monochromatic-stains's effort into setting this all up.

Photos taken by me will show in my gallery sometime early march, once i move in with *Equinox2004 and have decent intarwebz again.

Take care darlings, and im looking to set up another in Christchurch, at the end of march, just a quick heads up.
any suggestions for it that you wnat to throw my way im definitely up for suggestions.

Until next time, for the final time, before i head home at 9am tomorrow morning,

This is Yvan the great, Coming to you from sydney.

Hooroo

I Am here in Sydney and it's time for a spiffy devMEET.

Details:
Date: 9/2/2008
Time:10am
Location: Starbucks Circular Key! [map!]
Then Moving to: HSC artworks exhibition (ArtExpress) is at Gallery of NSW,

Contact: =yvanklestein on 0406976373 (Or +61406976373 if you're outside Aus)
Ask for Yvan
Feel free to ring/sms Me

Thanks very much to =monochromatic-stains for organising this, and i look forward to seeing you there!

]]> =yvanklestein Alive In melbourne... http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/16660291/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/16660291/ Thu, 31 Jan 2008 14:35:00 PST Im writing to you from the inbuilt ICafe in my backpackers, in the middle of Melbourne city!
oh how i anticipate the shopping here! *drool*

So How Is Everybody?
If you want to contact me while im in Aus, use 0406976373

So how is everyone?>

]]> =yvanklestein IM ALIVE http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/16425929/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/16425929/ Wed, 16 Jan 2008 01:20:07 PST A CSS free journal cos i dont have time to muck around.

i have 1000 emails, 113 journals, 364 deviations and ive just finished on comments.

i am still alive and still going to parachute festival in hamilton, and then to AUSTRALIA!

If you want to get hold of me when i am in aussie text or call me on +61406976373 . Special thanks to `timmy64 for the number.

take care darlings

much love to you all

]]> =yvanklestein Prolonged Absence http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/16254727/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/16254727/ Fri, 04 Jan 2008 12:18:30 PST
My Gallery My Stock My Prints My Favourites My Journals My Stamp Collection My Prettier Half My Wishlist Poll Of The Day Note Me Email Me

Friends

http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/14806947/ Wed, 26 Sep 2007 22:02:50 PDT

Christchurch

Tag

Photoshoots / Models

Shameless Whoring

Featuring ~Beckieflitz

Is slowly coming together, and can't come fast enough. Have at least two job interviews with my next trip down (23-25 October), hopefully I get a job out of one of them. Next step after then is finding a flat.
Anyone got a room i can live in till approx new years? There's this flat down there in shirley i'm keen for, but need somewhere to stay once i move, until then, when it becomes available.
Also, if you want to offer me a serious job down in Christchurch, feel free to hit me up.

deviantMEETS: Hoping to make the September 2 devMEETS a regular occurrence, who's keen?
Also wanting to do a devMEET in palmy Between now and when I move, Who's up for one?

Also, hopefully before i move i can make another trip up to go see debbie/`Tepara (Love ya hun!), otherwise ill have to make it my next trip after i move down.

Stole this from the wonderful =Punk-rock-chick

1. post these rules.
2. Each person tagged must post 8 random (hopefully interesting) facts about themselves.
3. Tags should write a journal of these facts.
4. At the end of the post 8 more bloggers are tagged and named.
5. Go to their page and leave a comment telling them that they're tagged.

^{1. I have/do own(ed) over 20 Cellphones

2. I buy lollipops 200 at a time

3. I do not iron my underwear

4. I own two suits

5. I send and recieve over 150 emails a day, on average

6. I must have a tri-pillow on my bed

7. I must be sucking a lollipop, or chewing gum when conducting a photo shoot

8. I've only just bought my first Lens Filter (Lens Polariser)}

<... ]]> =yvanklestein Blow Me and Call Me Bubbles+Features+september2 http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/14546695/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/14546695/ Fri, 14 Sep 2007 16:04:40 PDT

Featuring

Comment On This Journal In The Next 48 Hours to have your artwork Featured.

Thats really all i had to write about.
Freatured deviations of=obsidian-nightfire

Freatured deviations of~unwanted-princess

Freatured deviations of=eRiQ

=yvanklestein Tagged+Christchurch+No, I'm Not Engaged http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/14422261/ http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/14422261/ Tue, 04 Sep 2007 09:08:51 PDT

taggeded

Contests

devMEETs

Final Word

I Was Tagged By about Half A Dozen People, not least by `timmy64.
So Here we Go:

1. Post these rules
2. Each person tagged must post 8 random (hopefully interesting) facts about themselves
3. Tags should write a journal of these facts
4. At the end of the post 8 more bloggers are tagged and named
5. Go to their page and leave a comment telling them that they're tagged.

In Thirteen Hours I'm Hopping On A Plane to Go To Christchurch.

I Am Moving To Christchurch.

I Want To Die Dramatically. In A Way That Makes The Papers. I Dont Want To Just Fade Away.

There Are Three deviants I want to meet before I Die.

A Deviant Very Close To My Heart May Be Coming To See Me From Overseas

I Want To Be An Air Traffic Controller

If I Cannot Become an Air Traffic Controller, I would Seriously COnsider A Profession in Personal/Close protection ROlls.

I Find Boyshorts and Briefs Sexier than Thong Underwear On Ladies.

I TAG: *firedance99; @sine-out; =MaliceTear; =HyperCannon; *twitis; =http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/14183535/ Wed, 15 Aug 2007 16:38:31 PDT

Im Sorry

devMEETs

Your Fayse

... For Those who can't handle the truth.
Recently, I posted a comment on a deviant's journal. ^{(This deviant and i have sorted things out, this was written before that happened, and this person is no longer shitty at me.)} This deviant had said that there was a person, who didnt like said deviant.
Im sorry to all who dont realise, that this is actually the real world, and there are people who dont like you.
I can assure you, there are probably millions of people who don't like me. However, every time i get told to kill myself, or get told "I Hate You", or a recent favourite, "Go slit your wrists, you Gay Emo Fag", I dont write a journal.
Unfortunately, I am what i call, a realist. I Call it how i see it. Im not going to sugar coat things to make you feel special. Those people, who create all the "Woe Is Me, My Feelings are hurt, Reassure me that people love me" journals, or even the people who send texts etc, can expect no sympathy from me. I used to write journals like that, i admit. But I hate that part of my past, and will be the first person to admit it.
If You DO NOT LIKE MY HONESTY CLICK HERE And Click the Checkbox next to =yvanklestein in the "Remove" Column, and click Update.
For Those who say "If you have nothing nice to say, dont say anything."and this is addressed to all who say that, not just this one person concerned, Fuck You. Just because you may be having a bad day, doesnt mean all you are going to hear are the things you want to hear. This Is reality.

September 2 Is coming together nicely
After many hours of deliberation (I Dread this Month's Phone Bill), Things are slowly coming together with =sevenworldscollide, with the plans for our September 2 devMEET.
FOr Those who dont know, it will begin, at 3.30pm (or as close to then as possible, depends how long it takes Someone to get ready. ^{Apparently girls arent that good at just Getting up, Having A shower, getting dressed, running yer fingers thru your hair, and away yer go. . Just joking luv, yer know I love yer.
=yvanklestein

What. A. Fucking. Day. + devMEETs
http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/14101345/
http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/14101345/
Sun, 12 Aug 2007 10:10:05 PDT

devMEETs

What. A Fucking. Day.

On A Side Note...

And lastly...

My Gallery
My Stock
My Prints
My Favourites
My Journals
My Family
My Stamps
My Wishlist
My PhotoBlog
Poll Of The Day
Note Me
Email Me

So, there are a few devMEETS im going to be involved in, So here they are,

If you would like to help with any of them, that would rock, especially the ones in aussie, i will need someone to help me on that end, because I dont know Melbourne,Brisbane, or Sydney.

Christchurch, New Zealand.

Sunday September 2. Starbucks, Cashel Street, 3.30pm Start.

Click HERE for more Info.

Palmerston North, New Zealand.

Date and Venue Not Yet Set, Still Collecting Interest.

If you ARE interested, Please note me...

Melbourne, Australia.

Friday, February 1, Venue Not Set, Please Note Me if you can help.

^{Click Here For More Info On My Trip To Australia}

Brisbane, Australia.

Tuesday, February 5, Venue Not Set, Please Note Me if you can help.

^{Click Here For More Info On My Trip To Australia}

Sydney, Australia.

Saturday, February 9, Venue Not Set, Please Note Me if you can help.

^{Click Here For More Info On My Trip To Australia}

If you are in a similar area to me, Palmerston North, New Zealand. (Will Be In Christchurch from February), And you are interested in co-ordinating a devMEET, Note me, and im sure we'll be able to sort something Out. http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/14025312/
Sun, 05 Aug 2007 07:37:11 PDT

On The Agenda

Stuff And Things

Everything At Once

If You Make Me A Bright Green And Blue CSS for my journal, That I decide to use, You will win yourself a 3 month sub. Note me if you have any questions, or would like to submit an entry.

CONDITIONS: _{It must have a Sidebar, and little boxes for avatars that i can use for at the bottom where i have my Watch0rz and such. dowsnt have to be horixontal, they can be vertical, or like the ones in =Punk-rock-chick's Journal.

You will need to submit it as a deviation, with a screenshot of what it should look like. And Note me a link to it. Competition closes in at least two weeks. Basically, until i find one i really like.}

Yes, `Tepara who recently got promoted to Senior deviant, Blew me in Taupo Pizza Hut, on april 27 2007. I made a smart arse comment. She responded. I Said "blow me". And she blew on me. And my Pizza .

You can check out my Polls Of the Day Journal, to see the past polls, and to suggest new topics. I try to get a new one up every day. If i miss a day, dont hound me for it, however. It doesnt mean i dont love you. It means im having a rare day, controlling my life OUTSIDE of deviantART. Yes Chillens, I'm Scared Too.

Oh, Go Give some Love. And Lots Of Hugs. And Rubbings.

My watch0rz:

http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/13979517/
Thu, 02 Aug 2007 00:13:50 PDT

On The Agenda

Holiday Photos (MATURE CONTENT)

DeviantOfTheYear

The Move

Holiday Photos (MATURE CONTENT)

Got These In An Email From `Tepara and I Have To Share:

DeviantOfTheYear

Everybody check out *deviantoftheyear

and DeviantOfTheYear's Wiki

The Move

YES! It's Happening!

I AM MOVING!

Im moving from the wonderful PalmyVegas, to Christchurch.

I've been talking about it for months, even years, but I have decided to actually DO it.

I wont be in Palmerston North for long after I return from Australia. I Look forward to any deviantMEETs I can arrange down in Christchurch, And possibly a farewell-type party for when I leave Palmerston North. Any suggestions? for deviantMEETs in either city, Please feel free to contact me, by note or emailing deviantART@drake.net.nz.

Thats about all I can think about putting down here, so, yeah.

Dont forget to check out my Poll Of The Day

And Stay Tuned For September Second...

http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/13742332/
Sat, 25 Aug 2007 06:41:48 PDT

Poll Of The Day Is bought To You by =yvanklestein

Suggestions For Future Polls, Can Be Made At The Polls Of The Day Forum.

[EDIT] The List Has Been Inverted, So The Most Recent Poll Is At The Top

The Polls:

04/11/07What Is Your Favourite Cookie?

02/11/07Do You Liek packing to move?

01/11/07Am I As Awesome As I Make Myself Out To Be

31/10/07After you "Turn your head and cough" for the doctor, would it be innappropriate to ask to cuddle?

30/10/07Have you ever used an abbreviation in conversation without realising?

29/10/07Do You Like Boston Legal?

28/10/07Do You Ever Plan To Have Children?

27/10/07Friends

26/10/07Do You Think I'll get It?

23/10/07Do You Own any Â£deviantWEAR?

22/10/07Do You Read NOVELS for pleasure?

20/10/07Have You ever Been To A devMEET?

19/10/07Which do you find more Intimate

18/10/07Have you ever found "The One" only to be heartbroken?

16/10/07How Would You Rate My Photography

14/10/07How Hawt Is =LP4ng3l-for-lif3

13/10/07Do You Support My Latest Project: =DeviantFeatures

12/10/07Should I Create A New Account For My POLLS OF THE DAY

11/10/07Have You Ever Had Sex With Another Deviant?

10/10/07Ever Slept With A Coworker?

10/10/07Have You Ever Had SexyTiem At Your School or Workplace?

08/10/07What Form(s) Of Contraception Do You Use?

07/10/07Who do you prefer sexytiem with?

6/10/07When Do You Do Your Sexytiem?

04/10/2007Do You Approve Of pr0n?

03/10/07Have You Watched The Paris Hilton Sexytiem Video

02/10/07Lights on, or Off

01/10/07How Do You Do Your Sexytiem?

30/09/07When Did You Last Have Sexytiem?

29/09/07Next Weeks Polls Should Be About:

28/09/07Do you/Would You let a cat sleep in your bed?

27/09/07 Do You Judge A Cat By It's Colour or Personality?

25/09/07 Do You Prefer A Long Or Short Haired Kitten?

24/09/07http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/13691106/
Wed, 11 Jul 2007 04:16:53 PDT

On The Agenda

So Here's How It Works:

SO WHAT DO I DO?

The Puzzle

THIS CONTEST WAS WON BY =andipandixx - After ONLY 20 mins

So Here's How It Works:

Sudoku is a logic-based number placement puzzle. The objective is to fill a 9x9 grid so that each column, each row, and each of the nine 3x3 boxes (also called blocks or regions) contains the digits from 1 to 9. The puzzle setter provides a partially completed grid.

You can find more information about it Here

SO WHAT DO I DO?

Well, Below is a standard SuDoKu grid.

All you need to do is fill this in, in whatever form you like, as long as you use ENGLISH numbers, or whatever you like as long as the only characters you use are ( 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 or 9 ) and send it back to SudokuChallenge@Drake.net.nz as an attachment, in either a .txt document, as a .jpg, or as a .pdf .

The first, and only the first correct entry will win the 3 month subscription to deviantART .

If you want to donate the subscription, that's fine, just say who (which deviant) you'd like to give it to, and, of course with your entry you will need to include your deviantUSERNAME.

Any questions, please feel free to reply with them,

Good Luck To You All!

=Y

My watch0rz:

http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/13604770/
Sat, 07 Jul 2007 07:30:42 PDT

On The Agenda

ublic Transport

You gotta love the Canadian sense of humour.

Till Death Do Us Part

The Blonde Will Do Anything!

You Find Out Interesting Things When You Have Sons,

InterTasmanLove

Lettim Dig

RISQUÃ RIDDLES

KIDS WRITING ABOUT THE SEA

Public Transport

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I do apologize for the delay to your service. I know you're all dying to get home, unless, of course, you happen to be married to my ex-wife, in which case you'll want to cross over to the Westbound and go in the opposite direction."

"Your delay this evening is caused by the line controller suffering from E & B syndrome: not knowing his elbow from his back-side. I'll let you know any further information as soon as I'm given any."

"Do you want the good news first or the bad news? The good news is that last Friday was my birthday and I hit the town and had a great time. The bad news is that there is a points failure somewhere between Stratford and East Ham, which means we probably won't reach our destination."

"Ladies and gentlemen, we apologize for the delay, but there is a security alert at Victoria station and we are therefore stuck here for the foreseeable future, so let's take our minds off it and pass some time together. All together now.... 'Ten green bottles, hanging on a wall.....'."

"We are now travelling through Baker Street ... As you can see, Baker Street is closed. It would have been nice if they had actually told me, so I could tell you earlier, but no, they don't think about things like that".

"Beggars are operating on this train. Please do NOT encourage these professional beggars. If you... ]]>
=yvanklestein

NEW CONTEST...
http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/13546708/
http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/13546708/
Sat, 30 Jun 2007 01:42:51 PDT

On The Agenda

About The Contest

Timeline

Rules

About The Contest

Once again, not an overly artistic contest, other than the fact you will get a sub out of it.

BUT: What I want from you, in this contest, is ideas for future contests. What you think a good contest for me to run would be.

If your idea for a contest is chosen for one of the four contests,(run every 3 months), I run over the next year, you will win a 3 month subscription.

Please share this around, itÂs about the community, lets make the deviantART community aware of it. Please link back to THIS journal.

Please read the below rules before taking any other action, in regards this contest.

You Can Copy This Code To Let Others Know About This Contest...

(<a href="http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/13546708/">=Yvanklestein's Idea For A Contest Contest</a>)

Timeline

Sunday July 1: Contest Announced, Entries open to contest.deviantART@drake.net.nz ONLY. (no entries accepted by note, comment, text message, snail mail, sky writing, valentines card, bumper sticker).

Saturday September 1, 12AM NZST: Entries close. All entries are considered and narrowed down to 10 Entries.

Monday September 10th: Top Ten entries, as chosen by me, are sent to my Ghost Judges. These are anonymous deviants who will vote for their favourite contest ideas.

Monday September 17th: Ghost Judge Votes will be collected and counted. The top 4 contest ideas will be decided.

Monday October 1st: First Winning Contest entry Announced and prize awarded. And the next Winning entry announced and prizes awarded every three (calender) months from there (i.e. from the first of the month).

Rules

If you wish to discuss any of the rules stated, please either note me or email me contest.deviantART@drake.net.nz . Do not comment or question the rules in the comments section. They will be Hidden, Ignored, and not replied to.

Rules and final decisions are subject to change at any time, you may make recommendations, but in the end, itÂs at my discretion.

If you contest or challenge any of these rules, please contact me, or simply, do not take part in this contest.

Entry rules

^{Â You can enter as many times as you want. BUT. Each entry must be in its own email. With one Suggestion per entry.

Â You can enter the contest for which you suggested the idea. However IF you do enter, you can have no say in the voting/judging process.

Â You MUST be a deviant

ÂIf you wish to donate your prize (if you are selected), You MUST include the dA Username of the person/club you wish your prize given to in your entry email. If you do not, your decision to donate it to someone else may be missed, resulting in you receiving your prize, not your nominated deviant.

Â Entries must accompanied by a brief, easy to understand description of how the contest works. (I.e deviants must submit a deviation based upon [idea here] ).

Â Entries MUST be received at contest.deviantART@drake.net.nz . BEFORE 12 AM, NZT, on the morning of Saturday, September 1.

Â Entries Must be submitted to contest.deviantART@drake.net.nz Entries to any other note, comment, text message, snail mail, sky writing, valentines card, bumper sticker etc. WILL NOT BE CONSIDERED... ]]>
=yvanklestein

You Asked For It...
http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/13546700/
http://yvanklestein.deviantart.com/journal/13546700/
Sat, 30 Jun 2007 01:42:03 PDT

You Asked For It...

So Here they Are: All the entries to my, now completed, Did You Know... Contest,

Congrats to =blueisyourcolor, =warstar and *Maria87 for their entries,

But without further ado, Here are all the entries into this contest.}

The Entries...

"More people die each year from falling coconuts then shark atacks"

Canada had a political party called the Rhinoceros Party

A man's beard grows fastest when he anticipates sex.

Sri Lanka has lowest divorce rate in the world - and the highest rate of female suicide

It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide.

By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage must take place.

Horses may not be kept in bathtubs.

It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays.

North Carolina Law says that: If a man and a woman who aren't married go to a hotel/motel and register themselves as married then, according to state law, they are legally married

It is illegal to give or receive oral sex in South Carolina.

did u know that a pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes?

did u know iguanas have two penises?

did you know horses can't vomit?

did you know marilyn monroe had six toes?

did you know turtles can breathe through their butts?

Did you know that cows and sheep produce more green house gas emitions then cars

did you know if you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb?

did you know cat's urine glows under a black light?

did you know ribbon worms will eat themselves if they cant find any food?

"More then 2500 left handed people are killed each yearfrom useing right handed products

from useing right handed products"}